Cleaning with Mario #9 Baldilocks & The Three Hairs

[Johnnoijones]

After watching what he has in his essential cleaning box I am going straight to watch the highlights on his story about the toilet brush at the start of his jurney. Oh Melvin we are so jealous or you lying on your toilet floor in you filthy housecoat

 

[Exhausted Pigeon]

Since he is a boring bastard maybe we should just keep the same thread title and just change the number Baldilocks and the three hairs is inspired!

I agree. The suggestions made are all far too clever and funny for a thread of his. Keep it basic. Like him.

 

[Here for the truth]

On my weekly trip out for necessities I saw that Tesco bathroom anti bac spray that smells unreal. I had a sniff. Don’t bother. It’s like every other cheap cleaner out there. His sense of smell is as bad as his eyesight.

 

[Bostonx]

Honestly this pandemic has taught him a new word. Everything is essential. My essential wax melts. My essential cleaning products. Eugh

 

[Cagayu]

Cleaning with Mario #10 - fanny cushions

 

[Wheretonext]

Why doesn’t he get Ava May to make a tesco anti bac toilet cleaner wax melt. He f**king hasn’t stopped going on about the smell. He Lloooooovvvveeees it so much

 

[lauramars]

Mario #10 proof that you can’t polish a turd but can roll it in glitter, please remove the pubes before you wipe the shitter

 

[BananaClub]

Maggiemuffin definitely has IBS ..irritable b*astard syndrome

 

[Goldieoldie]

I actually think he is so lonely. Xx

 

[GiftedWaxMelts]

After watching what he has in his essential cleaning box I am going straight to watch the highlights on his story about the toilet brush at the start of his jurney. Oh Melvin we are so jealous or you lying on your toilet floor in you filthy housecoat

Cleaning with Mario #10 Boujie Toilet Brush Journey

 

[TheNiceBeardMan]

So ma lovelies.

Has mazdaprice found a parking space for his shark steamer yet?

 

[Dollylollipop]

I actually think he is so lonely. Xx

I agree..all he has is Instagram

 

[D2theyawn]

So super Mario has a dose of the shits. Well it’s not just a dose of the shits. It has to be so much more with him. It’s IBS. The rest of us eat something dodgy and we get a dose of the shits... but not Mario. His arse is special.

Everything about this wee scrote is special.

why does everything have to be a jurney???? duck me

 

[lauramars]

Maz now has a favourite alcoholic drink?? He hardly drinks apparently

 

[Badaboom]

I actually think he is so lonely. Xx

That is maybe true, but Derek will only work for say, 8 hours, so he is not alone ALL day. He has Ryan, pets are good company. He could volunteer, he could offer to help out neighbours. He could go out and exercise every day. I think rather than lonely maybe he just doesn’t have any hobbies other than Instagram and content for many accounts has become difficult since lockdown as they rely on buying so much all the time.

 

[D2theyawn]

That is maybe true, but Derek will only work for say, 8 hours, so he is not alone ALL day. He has Ryan, pets are good company. He could volunteer, he could offer to help out neighbours. He could go out and exercise every day. I think rather than lonely maybe he just doesn’t have any hobbies other than Instagram and content for many accounts has become difficult since lockdown as they rely on buying so much all the time.

The guy is so insecure that he barely leaves the house without dereks company. I mean, up until this lockdown, Derek was still meeting him at Paisley gilmour street station after his work? I don’t know if it’s been the years of abuse for being gay or whatever (so he says) that’s made an impact, and to be fair I would t like that to he the case with anyone, but really I think what gets me most is that he makes out he has this larger than life personally via instagram and doesn’t take any tit etc yet then again we can all see the contradictions when he does duck all by himself? And the total made up stories like the fans on the train, the postman saga, the big drama crossing the road, as his luvlies constantly messaging him blowing smoke up his arse??? None of these things actually happen, he is looking for attention and to be liked. The wee scrote wouldn’t say boo to a goose. he just likes to spread false rumours to Instagram that he’s so very well liked and adored when in reality no one gives a flying duck mate

 

[GiftedWaxMelts]

Oh God guys, I’m so bored today that I actually just watched his sodding toilet brush highlight! Curiosity got the better of me!

I can’t believe he used to bin one every fortnight before he discovered the miraculous disposable head Duck one. I wonder how many toilet brushes he’s sent to landfill over the years!

 

[BananaClub]

Oh God guys, I’m so bored today that I actually just watched his sodding toilet brush highlight! Curiosity got the better of me!

I can’t believe he used to bin one every fortnight before he discovered the miraculous disposable head Duck one. I wonder how many toilet brushes he’s sent to landfill over the years!

well with the amount of tit that come out his mouth as well as his arse ...I’d say a tit load

 

[Kikini Bamalam]

That is maybe true, but Derek will only work for say, 8 hours, so he is not alone ALL day. He has Ryan, pets are good company. He could volunteer, he could offer to help out neighbours. He could go out and exercise every day. I think rather than lonely maybe he just doesn’t have any hobbies other than Instagram and content for many accounts has become difficult since lockdown as they rely on buying so much all the time.

Melvin would never volunteer to help others if there isn't anything in it for him. If it's not about Melvin, he's not interested.

 

[cleaningupthecrap]

I think we should petition him to change the name of his account to "surface cleaning with Mario"

or "superficial cleaning with Mario"