Cleaning with Mario #46 Xmas PJs smell the wealth, our very own Mario elf on the shelf

[Alansbigplate]

And isn’t his brother an actor? So if anything, Mario, as we all know, is the least talented person in that family. Pathetic little man. His parents must be so proud

Now hen he has got a talent for turning money into shite

 

[Babybail93]

With the shite he eats I think he will need something like this…

Can you imagine how long it’d take for the water to run clear? Paisley would be on a hosepipe ban in the middle of winter

 

[Cagayu]

I thought his talent was managing to fit through his front door with that massive head of his

 

[Pabsy]

Mah lovelies! I just popped into b&m the day and I had the entire Christmas section all tae mahsel. I had to reframe mahself from buying the whole wee shop but I didnae. Anyway have a cosy day lovelies

 

[Dawn Dayn]

Mario is in Wilko. Vein throbbing in my temple. What year is it.

 

[TheNiceBeardMan]

Still can't get over he said an actual wooden tray had a wooden effect. Mate, it's real wood you Plank.

*paints couple of stripes of paint on a wooden sleigh*

*decides I now have a talent*

Bow down bitchez

 

[Babybail93]

I love how he is calling the Lays crisps “holiday crisps” like he has ever been abroad in his life

 

[Badaboom]

Hurt his neck doing wit??? He’s got nae content and making up shit about he’s no well. Get tae bed ya fanny!

He has been jumping in and oot of the seasonal laines, sped out of Autumn into Halloween then straight onto Christmas. He has given himself bespoke whiplash, so aye.

 

[Babybail93]

Is that a mushroom on the keyring?! ....... Oh it's a jellyfish, but read the quote
That has to have been sent as a wind up

Funny that, cause I wouldn’t piss on him if he were on fire

 

[menopausalmargrit]

Fucking DEEED at this ma lovelie

Do we have a translator among us please
I have tried my best but I just cannot plod on….

Up on his feet more? He’s talking like he’s been paralysed for months!

 

[Babybail93]

Aw lovelie ah think we’re in for sum jurney along Clutch Ma Beak Lane!
Can any of the Original Marion fans tell us the main highlights tae look oot for? Other than:
Cosy!
Festive!
Candles oan! And so forth.

His “Boy Wonder” highlight shows how awful he speaks to Derek. Also check out the one where Ava May visited him by surprise. He comes out the toilet saying he’s got the shits and clutching his stomach. We all think he’d just done a massive stinking jobby just as she knocked on the cell door

 

[Skyflier6727]

He must have such a sad life to constantly be wishing it away. Can’t enjoy balmy summer nights as he wants an autumn “jurney”. We are barely in autumn and he wants it to be Christmas. No sooner will his tree go up he will be hiding Easter eggs. I cannae keep up. I barely know what day it is half the time and he’s confusing me

 

[Dawn Dayn]

Today must go on the wiki. Only oor Mario could reveal that sky are robbing him blind on the day they've given every single other account a free TV. But he's not bitter, he hates them.

Ok, so it should've been "their new release".

And I thought using "youse" interchangeably for "you" and "use" was bad.

He's from Ardrossan, which he spells adrossan. I don't think there's a single post or story without many spelling and grammar mistakes.

 

[Alansbigplate]

My fave new masda poasting style is the list:

Crabbit!
Am no well!
Cosy!
All am sayin the day!!

 

[menopausalmargrit]

Margrit has just given us a small glimpse of Christmas at his own hoose. Is it you, or Mr Margrit dressed as santa ma lovelie?

*runs off laughing*

Oft ma lovelie, Mr Margrit and I are too pished on Christmas Eve to even contemplate a game of hide the sausage.

 

[menopausalmargrit]

I’ve got visions of me having to goto Beruit on 6th November to see the big Christmas reveal in person. Obv I’ll take photos for aw you trolls.

 

[menopausalmargrit]

Remember the time he deep fried eggs and thought they were the best eggs ever!!! Oh Marion, never change!!!

 

[hopethishelpsallthebest]

View attachment 794092
It’s ‘something new is coming’ Marian. FFS, it’s a basic enough sentence how can you not get it right?!?

I think it's going to be a bespoke Mario Moppit cloth.

Smell the wealth my lovelies.

View attachment 794100

Message him and say he can have it for 15 pound.

 

[hopethishelpsallthebest]

Hello ma lovelies, just putting ma favourite wee parts of the speed clean up. I particularly loved the foot pumping action. And the wee gaze out the window. The slippers on his little footsies. And his arse in Christmas pj's. The back of the head which resembles a thumb.

 

[honey&lemon]

Ok so I’m not cleaner ( it’s not ma Joab!!) but surely you don’t mop a bathroom FIRST then go on to mop the rest of the house with the same mop!

And why wear gloves to clean the toilet if you then continue wearing them while cleaning the shower and touching your towel and this is his ACTUAL job