What a horrible little scrotebag he is, laughing his head off at the flat tyre, he really is a horrible horrible little bleep. He would have gone with Deek for the train too but either he has to wait with her because she's going back to the tat cave, or he seen someone here mention it so wants to prove us wrong, I hope she sees how self centred the prick is. No wonder he has no real friends and his family hate him.
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The back of his heed….wtf is going on there….am creased 
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so people will eventually be able to use the wifi password in the hall? They’ll be getting papped out by 7pm!Just had a proper look at Hannah's stories. Why does she talk in that sing song patronising way.
Love that Mario looks up to her like she's the Duchess of Cambridge, she's so common.
So Mario has the lassies coming roon tonight, bracing myself for another night of debauchery, ie bingo and bed by 9pm for Mario, then for me mild flirting with johno and Margrit from 10pm until my battery runs oot.
Ooh will he slap on his out of date make up on them, give them a blast of the dyson like being blessed by the Pope.
And, my other half spotted Deek in Glasgow Central.
Given he’s aw air fresheners and no car I doubt it’s happened to him before!!
When he was a wee baine he was so ugly that his Mammy couldn’t bare to pick him up. So he just laid in his crib 24/7, hence the flat head. Hope that helps ma lovelyThe back of his heed….wtf is going on there….am creased
Reminds me of Sloth from the Goonies ma lovelies, so aye...The back of his heed….wtf is going on there….am creased
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Looks like his wigs slipped forwardThe back of his heed….wtf is going on there….am creased
The past 24 hours has basically been H and Mario reposting each others instagram stories. No wonder Derek fucked off, they've both had their noses in their phones the whole time 
Where ever she has gone from in Yorkshire she’s had like a almost 5 hour drive for that! Wasn’t hardly worth it was it
Why the duck are they parked in a disabled bay??? 
It’s ok my lovely. Mario has his sunflower lanyard. The bleeping prickWhy the duck are they parked in a disabled bay???
Now he has people coming over it is time for the high footfall flooring to shine 
He does that pathetic laughing thing that I do when I’m nervous or in the presence of my husband’s colleague who is so bloody hot I’m sure I could get pregnant just looking at him. But I tend to do that laughing hysterically whenever he says anything mildly amusing
Marion obviously thinks Hannah is so superior to him that he’s that pathetic simpering way!!!!I’m still convinced it’s a doop Deek!!!I actually cannae believe Deek fucked off and got the train
Actual feel uncomfortable with the fact he was on ma side of the river for the night, ma luvlies. I can almost smell the wealth 
Going to the wee lovely small businesses at Braehead the day for some bespoke meatballs, so will report if he's anywhere to be seen, doing the sights tour with H so aye and so forth.
Going to the wee lovely small businesses at Braehead the day for some bespoke meatballs, so will report if he's anywhere to be seen, doing the sights tour with H so aye and so forth.
Do we think the coo’s are coming to marios tonight then?
I hope whoever is visiting spills a massive glass of red wine all over his crapet
Seriously???? I have a disability badge and it fucks me off when people like that park in the bays and I can’t get parkedWhy the duck are they parked in a disabled bay???
I get people have hidden disabilities but put your bleeping badge out. If she’s parked there without a badge I hope someone gives her a bleeping dressing down. Stuck up cow. Sorry about that. This subject really riles me!
No brain that’s why.The back of his heed….wtf is going on there….am creased
If I ever see that wee shite out in Glasgow I’ll bleeping strangle him with it. Then again we don’t mix in the same places. Smell ma wealth ya wee prick.It’s ok my lovely. Mario has his sunflower lanyard. The bleeping prick
As if Derek fucked off and got the train Mario wouldn't have been laughing if he had to pay the tyre bill, no he'd have been pure crabbit! That's gratitude for you.
Anyway, at least he'll be home soon to prepare the no cheese cheeseboard, Tap-ass and lethal Aperol Spritz ready for the bingo lasses coming round to fawn over his Dyson hairdryer as If they've never seen one before. I can smell the Elizabeth Taylor perfume and desperation from here ma lovelies so aye.
Mario wouldn't have been laughing if he had to pay the tyre bill, no he'd have been pure crabbit! That's gratitude for you.Anyway, at least he'll be home soon to prepare the no cheese cheeseboard, Tap-ass and lethal Aperol Spritz ready for the bingo lasses coming round to fawn over his Dyson hairdryer as If they've never seen one before. I can smell the Elizabeth Taylor perfume and desperation from here ma lovelies so aye.
I can't believe Derek just left them and got the train home. What an ignorant little arse he is. I'm convinced he's a can short of a 6 pack anyway if I'm honest 
And what's so funny that a flat tyre has Maz in fake hysterics. You can tell he doesn't get out much.
Bet Hannah doesn't get back in a while after this weekend fail
And what's so funny that a flat tyre has Maz in fake hysterics. You can tell he doesn't get out much.
Bet Hannah doesn't get back in a while after this weekend fail
I’ve had longer tampon strings
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