PLEASE DO THIS ANYWAY
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I think we all know the real reason Derek conks out at bedtime is because he sedates himself with the wacky baccy, most likely to deal with living with that great walloper. No wonder Mario has to ‘plug himself’
I’d imagine the thought of having to touch Marios private bits is enough to give wee Derek PTSD. No wonder the poor bleep smokes his pan in at bed times.
I’d imagine the thought of having to touch Marios private bits is enough to give wee Derek PTSD. No wonder the poor bleep smokes his pan in at bed times.
Am I being oversensitive or is it in very poor taste to post about the Dunblane tragedy and then #plugmasel talking about his disgusting oil? 
Coming to a story near us soon...Marlene gets carried away with the black paint and makes Derek unrecognisable!
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Just playing catch up so sorry if repeating masel ma lovelies.... a week ago he said his intercom didn’t offend him, well it clearly did you liar, cos you have painted the fucker! 
. P.S. Marion, that filter makes you look like a cross between Toy Story Woody and Aunt Sally from the original Worzel Gummidge 
. P.S. Marion, that filter makes you look like a cross between Toy Story Woody and Aunt Sally from the original Worzel Gummidge Bellend
Doncha wish I'd stop downloading these appsOh my god. My eyes
Nightmares the night lads! If only I had some soft firm luxury pillows 
So he's painted his intercom buzzer. ?
derek passes out from the fumes of Marios aroma 
Aye I bet he does, mario should promote how well it hides the aroma of weed after derek hotboxes the flat 
Aye I bet he does, mario should promote how well it hides the aroma of weed after derek hotboxes the flat 
No, he's boiled ma pish about this too! He'd completely forgotten about the Dunblane anniversary til it was on telly. Fake sympathy, flogging tat and then wanting to go out raving to 90s dance tunes. He's all over the place with his content.Am I being oversensitive or is it in very poor taste to post about the Dunblane tragedy and then #plugmasel talking about his disgusting oil?
“My brand” 
OMFG! Whit an arse!
He was talking again as if he had personally mixed the scent rather than it being a ‘dupe’ he takes all the creddit. Step aside Tom Ford and the ‘lovely’ Hannah the success of this is ALL doon tae oor wee Melv
I heard the shares in Tom Ford have dropped after people discovered that Marion McKnight and Ava May actually made Black Orchid originally.OMFG! Whit an arse!
He was talking again as if he had personally mixed the scent rather than it being a ‘dupe’ he takes all the creddit. Step aside Tom Ford and the ‘lovely’ Hannah the success of this is ALL doon tae oor wee Melv
It’s an awful scent anyway. The only Tom Ford ones worth talking about are the Private Blends.
And right back intae ma lane a go.
I’ve found a photo of ooor Marion without his hoosecoat lads!
Hair on point!
Hair on point!
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