I don’t know where to begin today - I’ve just watched all his stories & it’s like all my Christmases have come at once
Face hydration mist
Caroline “Herons” who he loves & follows & watches & trusts, yet doesn’t know her name
“Ah’ve been doin’ ma eye seeruhm all wrong” Well, Mazda, if those strangler fingers doing the tippity tap is wrong, maybe I don’t wanna be right
And this unprecedented breaking news of an unnamed product: “It’z ma skincare bybul” but sadly, we’ll never know: “Ah’ll nivur show it oan Instagram beecoz ah doan’t wahnt it tae sell oot”
It’ll undoubtedly be some high end, luchzury bewty proaduct whilst poor Deek was “treated” to a £2.99 “doop” from Aldi
although I’m sure the other day he said Derek had bought it for him, not the other way round?
Must’ve been mistaken though, it’s not like Mazda ever just makes
tit up
And the glasses, THE GLASSES
Then he tried to do a serious piece to camera wearing them
“An’ this wiz suhmin’ else ah treatit mahsel tae...it’s in pink & it’s for, basically, for mah unit, jist as a display bewk”
What other kinds of books are there, Mario, what other kinds of books are there?
And I’m done
Done!
And so forth...