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My bladder cannae cope with all of this, I literally cannot stop laughing 
I canny believe ma een wi these 2, first thought when denek stepped oot was why's he in his jammies. Whit a bleeping state. If I'd bought my holiday clothes fae Primark and shein I'd be admitting it tae nae fucker, so oui.
Deek reminds me of special officer doofy reporting for duty, when he steps out showcasing his polyester nightmare ensemble! 
just waiting for the salute! 
just waiting for the salute! 
Ah'm beginning tae think youse ur Mario, and your photies ur real and no photoshopped. A bit like how Clark Kent and Superman huv never been seen in the same room. Huv youse and Mario ever been seen in Castlevecchi the gether
God he's bleeping insufferable isn't he?
The way Derek stands there like a blow up doll. His bag! It’s bigger than his head. Why do they need so many bags?
He's jist like a Glesga maw fae the 80s, there's nae way they two huv sex, mebbes wee Deek gets bitty fae maw Beak's moobs though.Ma lovelies, it's wild that this entertainment is absoluuuuuuuutely free
Why does he insist on wearing women's clothes?!. I wonder how many people elbowed each other in the restaurant whispering 'He's wearing a woman's cardi!' 
Mario's little witch part 2
We don't need telling you're no fashionista mate
Mario's little witch part 2
We don't need telling you're no fashionista mate
Ah've goat an exclusive of night three and four outfits.Wtaf is that granny cardie! What in earth do his family think when they see this parade of absolute stupidity.Amazed also. Affronted, appalled.
I don't even know if I can cope with another 5 outfits.
The crocheted granny cardigan has tipped me over the bespoke edge.
The crocheted granny cardigan has tipped me over the bespoke edge.
I just love this.
The way Derek was waiting to be called out. He obviously got an earful for his lackluster performance on night 1 and hit every mark this time (except for the leg bend to show off his little shoes). My favourite was how he managed to drop down his sunnies on cue.
Another five nights of outfits on the balcony await us. I’m so excited. My fave actually lit up when I saw night 2 was posted. Like Mario feels on an October morning when he sees his Christmas tree.
The way Derek was waiting to be called out. He obviously got an earful for his lackluster performance on night 1 and hit every mark this time (except for the leg bend to show off his little shoes). My favourite was how he managed to drop down his sunnies on cue.
Another five nights of outfits on the balcony await us. I’m so excited. My fave actually lit up when I saw night 2 was posted. Like Mario feels on an October morning when he sees his Christmas tree.
He looks like he’s been on holiday to Mercury the top hat. I’m guessing Spanish chemists don’t accept Klarna so buying in date SPF is out of the question.
“Come oot Derek”
I keep showing Mr Ellis his stories and he has come to the conclusion that Deek must be drugged up a la Jeffrey Dahmer
I am actually loving how excited they are, bless them
I keep showing Mr Ellis his stories and he has come to the conclusion that Deek must be drugged up a la Jeffrey Dahmer
I am actually loving how excited they are, bless them
Is there a translator in the hoose?
I love the way Deek was posing side to side like he'd been coached to, & then flashed the sole of his shoe right on cue!
Why does this idiot wear feminine fragrance? I just don’t get it. It’s the same with the Pandora charm bracelet. Makes nae sense in my brain 
OMG deek goin oot fur dinner in his pyjamas All he is missing is a pushchair to fall asleep in while Marion has a cheeky wee cocktail while watching the entertainment.
All he is missing is a pushchair to fall asleep in while Marion has a cheeky wee cocktail while watching the entertainment.
That luxurious boujee material polyester
Why is he wearing his mam's lace blouse?
Deek wearing a ''really nice material shirt'' - polyester, jeez.
His squinting is so bad.
Deek wearing a ''really nice material shirt'' - polyester, jeez.
His squinting is so bad.
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