Ah'm thinking something bespoke like this fae that wee small boutique homemade business Shein.What’s the guess on his birthday outfit, Summer vibes, classy, or boujie designer
Pyoor stunning, etc & also
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Pyoor stunning, etc & also
He’s fiiiine, hens.
He has a concrete sofa with mismatched cushions that he hasn’t been able to milk for content.
He has a kitchen renovation that looks completely unfinished because he didn’t fix The wonky handles or box in the leccy meter.
He doesn’t go anywhere so can’t keep up with the other Huns posting about their days out and summer holidays.
But he’s fiiiiiine. Just fiiiiiiiine.
He has a concrete sofa with mismatched cushions that he hasn’t been able to milk for content.
He has a kitchen renovation that looks completely unfinished because he didn’t fix The wonky handles or box in the leccy meter.
He doesn’t go anywhere so can’t keep up with the other Huns posting about their days out and summer holidays.
But he’s fiiiiiine. Just fiiiiiiiine.
Let’s hope and pray he doesn’t whip oot the mankini for his birthday outfit 
I thought we were going oan a boxing in jurnay, Marion hen please update xo
also I’m going on a journey that will take me through Beirut tomorrow so I’ll keep my wee eyes peeled and hope for a sighting
also I’m going on a journey that will take me through Beirut tomorrow so I’ll keep my wee eyes peeled and hope for a sighting
We can't wait! 
*insert sarcasm* 
Big fanny
*insert sarcasm* Big fanny 
Oh good he's going to pre recore it for us, guess that's us all staying home this weekend to make sure we're not so busy we miss it...! Love a good pre recore me
@AllieBee it’s almost as good as a decoring jurnee so aye. #IYKYK
The fat beast will never fit into any of his claes for next year, he’s completely deluded also.
The fat beast will never fit into any of his claes for next year, he’s completely deluded also.
@kettlekitten here we are hen now sit doon oan the concrete block sofa wae some criss and joos and make yersel aww cosy ma luvlee
Deep joy, it’s Annual Leave next week. What do you think he’s got lined up?
Flairs, more bleep washings, not using his Hetty and visits to The Range, B&M, Castlevecchi and McD’s is my guess. Whatever he does it will be underwhelming and accompanied by a duck load of moaning.
Flairs, more bleep washings, not using his Hetty and visits to The Range, B&M, Castlevecchi and McD’s is my guess. Whatever he does it will be underwhelming and accompanied by a duck load of moaning.
How does someone that works 2 hours a week have so much annual leave?
Even worse than a candle, it’s an electric diffuser that uses essential oils in water and puts out a vapour, right above where wee raynes food and water bowls are. The absolute knobhead
Calling it noo, either himself or Deek (or both) will be struck doon with sickness and he'll spend the week aff Instagram in a huff. But in reality he just has nae pals or plans and needs an excuse to fester in his hoosecoat. What a sad little life Jane.
My damaged brain read sugar as suicidal
Yass, it’s yet more annual leave for Maz. Will he flash his free bus pass/shart card oan the mega bus and go to Edinburgh for a costa? Will he jump on the McGills to braehead for a McDonald’s? Or will he play it safe with a pile of slop in the bespoke restaurant that is Jam jar. Canny wait to find out!
What he so smug? Birthday outfit bought & styled to duck (boak) holiday clothes for next year bought, no doubt he’s already planned his whole Xmas theme & got 87 million bleeping pumpkins in his Etsy basket - even though he doesne like Halloween. Does he thinks this is all an achievement? He wanked on for ages about not letting people put you down for where you live, clearly embarrassed to live in a hamster cage. And posted how it’s “no fair” that he’ll never experience being a parent. Yet all he seems to want to do is come across better than his “audience” which is certainly almost all women & the majority of them will be parents. He is one miserable, bitter, horrible, superficial wee shite & boasting on Instagram is his only single achievement in life. He could have the life he longed for if he wasn’t such a Bellend & spent all his money on 818182 sippy cups & constantly redecorating & refurbishing his Basra council flat. He hates his own circumstances & the only way he makes himself feel better about it, is by being a bleep to everyone else.
So aye, spine bright & so forth hens.
So aye, spine bright & so forth hens.
Can you just imagine him walking down the aisle in a big taffeta wedding dress and veil to Derek stoned oot his nut in a rangers top!! 
Plus also I hate folk that pull those stupid faces when they sing
factual
Plus also I hate folk that pull those stupid faces when they sing
factual
So is it 9 or 10 years you’ve been together? 5 or 6 years engaged? He’s such a lying little scrote.
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Ffs marionette is it 10 years or 8 years you've been with deed deek cos you change it all the time. You told hinch you'd been with deek 10 years. Cannae keep up with your own lies you michelen man.
Bespoke discalculia also
Maths isn't his strong point. He cannae remember when he moved in and canne remember when he met Deek.
This piccy was posted in 2019, they apparently had been together for 4 years at that point, so got together in 2015.
Sept 2023 = nearly 8.
This piccy was posted in 2019, they apparently had been together for 4 years at that point, so got together in 2015.
Sept 2023 = nearly 8.
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