Childfree by choice #6 Sleeping well at night, petition for childfree flights

[shadowcat5]

What next to the list? Sex? Well what's the point if its not for making kids?

I would fucking love someone legitimately to tell a childfree person they wouldn't bother with sex if they didn't have kids. I would fucking love it

For a few years now I've been going to a safari park (like Longleat) for my birthday with my Dad, and I've been told by numerous people that it's "weird" because it's "for kids"

It's animals!!!!
Will add safari/zoos/animal parks to the list as well. Shall I just go the whole way and add aquariums too as they are basically the same and probably 'for kids'?

 

[shadowcat5]

I thought this too, so many times parents exaggerate situations because their sprog is so important to them and they don’t get why others don’t see it.

that was my thought - I picked up on “excited to see you” like I get a 2 year old would be excited but that made me think there was more too it

 

[paulpercy666]

Nothing gives me greater joy than the mumsnet thread on here but tbh that isn’t about parenthood per se, it’s more because the posters on mumsnet are surely a social experiment or completely demented if real. But I wouldn’t be going on an actual parenting/children based thread and posting all about my fantastic childfree existence. Maybe I’ll start, just to rub salt in the wound

 

[Rippedjeanmaybe]

oooh can I join u

More child free people the better

 

[shadowcat5]

how did you not manage to go mad??? That would drive me absolutely insane!!

I did the classic british thing of being annoyed but too polite to say anything.

Also not going to lie, I felt a bit bad for the kid. It was stressing me out just listening to it and it wasn't my sandwich
His mum and dad kept asking him if he wanted different things at the same time and he kept pointing at stuff and they'd say 'no you can't have that, do you want xyz?' Then they settled on chicken so then they kept asking if he wanted cheese but then the kid would point to something else he wanted so they'd go 'no you can't have that, do you want cheese?' It was just a disaster. Not the kid's fault obviously.

Although I'm still not sure a 3 and 6 year old are going to eat a whole 6inch sub either given I'm 26 and struggle. I don't think they bothered looking at the menu for the kids meals.

 

[shadowcat5]

what in the world is a boddler?!

is it a baby/toddler hybrid for people who don’t want their babies to grow up?

No idea. I thought 0-1 year is a baby, 1-3 is a toddler, 3+ is a child. Once you're old enough for proper school nursery are you still a toddler? I would say old enough for a school uniform = child. Then again, clearly I am not a child expert so that could be crap

Weirdly I just saw a thread for 'boddlers' come up on here! I assumed it was someone who's not quite baby, not quite toddler, but I clicked on it out of curiosity and there's a poll about how old your boddler is and the youngest category is 0-3 months. Surely that's absolutely not a 'boddler' by any stretch of the imagination! Whatever it means it makes me think of Bodger & Badger whenever I type it out

Agreed but (see above) to me I don't know what not quite a baby not quite a toddler is? A toddler is past the baby stage and is toddling no? 0-3 months is not toddling? neither is 6 months. Those are babies. 10 months+ is surely boddler territory? Idk folks, I'm not here to judge. I just can't figure it out

 

[rosemarina]

That's terrible. "Normal"!

 

[shadowcat5]

I’m going to go against the grain here and say that the 9 months of maternity leave isn’t really all that much of a perk.
Okay so you do get to be off work full pay for 9 months, big perk and see where people are coming from, but when you come back to work you’re basically just working to put your kid in nursery, unless you’re lucky enough to have family willing to help out.
Now I know people are going to say “well you chose to have a child” but realistically, 9 months of work full pay to then end up with less money and still working is not a decent trade off for me. I’d rather be in work and have my money to spend, also be able to use my annual leave for me and not have to keep it for school holidays

 

[Mrs Fluff]

My sister in law recently had a baby. I’m really happy for her and he is super cute but when she sends pictures of him in the family group chat she speaks as the baby it really annoys me when people do that

And refer to themselves as Mum/Mam etc

 

[Rippedjeanmaybe]

Sorry to hear that, must be so hard for you ALL. (I notice you didn’t mention yourself there). Being a sibling is still ‘having a family’ and we’re all aware of just what a lack of control that affords you.

Sending love. 🤍

Yes and me too. I was very young at the time, he ended up in a residential school & voluntary care before I turned 5, but I was still on the SS at risk register prior due to the violence etc.

thank you

 

[Rippedjeanmaybe]

I’ve just had small children running around just outside my room in my office, what on earth… didn’t know I worked in a nursery

 

[DaisyDaisy87]

Agreed but (see above) to me I don't know what not quite a baby not quite a toddler is? A toddler is past the baby stage and is toddling no? 0-3 months is not toddling? neither is 6 months. Those are babies. 10 months+ is surely boddler territory? Idk folks, I'm not here to judge. I just can't figure it out

It’s really not that deep guys, we created it as a semi joke. We didn’t have time to dissect the meaning this much

 

[EyeLoveIcelands]

I used to work in a nursery that had the cheapest fees in the area and full time it was close to 12.5k a year. Thats just for one child... I didn't even earn that much working there! Imagine having to pay out the vast majority of your wages on childcare? What's the point in even working? Especially if you have more than one child. I know once they hit 3 it's subsidised but you still have to contribute a lot.

Vom!! Women will stay working at a loss even, so they can keep climbing the career ladder. Once the kids are at full time school it pays off apparently. Happy parenthood is reserved for the rich/elite.

 

[Mycatoliver]

wow what a lovely memory, now forever recorded on the internet, for their children to look back on!

saw this poor woman on twitter and some of the comments are just mad. including one that basically says that the five year old should be made the centre of the day and gift presents etc and don’t discipline her, she’s a baby! at five you KNOW that the presents under the tree aren’t all for you!

The woman moaning about her kid opening presents without her
I thought it was a parody and the ending would be the mum saying thank you to the daughter, thank you for not waking us up at 5am

 

[Rippedjeanmaybe]

I'm the opposite, I love going into work super early so I can get out and do what I want with the rest of my day. Then I get "part-timer" comments from the jealous parents, they can't roll in until 9 because of daycare so have to stay until 5.

Hardly a part timer if you’re doing the same hours

 

[OIM]

It’s really not that deep guys, we created it as a semi joke. We didn’t have time to dissect the meaning this much

Tbh I’ve been too busy being a mum, putting my hair in a mum bum and working to really think!

 

[Saddlesoap]

I’ve only just seen this - omg why do we not work together?!

I’ve had this happen so many times too! Kids screaming at the sight of a needle while I’m trying to inject a wiggly cat and then the cat’s on the ceiling and I’m covered in scratches I don’t mind them there if they behave or they’re polite - I’ve had so many lovely children in who ask good questions and I let them use my stethoscope etc, but the rude ones drive me mad

Naa not letting them use my stethoscope.

 

[lastdis]

genuine question, as a parent, what attracts you to this thread?!

this isn’t an attack or anything, i’m just intrigued as we seem to have had so many parents post over the past few weeks. i’m wondering if it’s some kind of curiosity or if it’s just genuinely sharing stuff you’ve seen.

I have a few childfree friends . they have struggled and with judgement and snide comments. ive Said a lot I’ve tried to get them to join but they haven’t yet felt like they could, they say they feel single out a lot.

I am struggling to see what this post adds to this thread exactly? Why would we want to find a post about our own thoughts and feelings that we have already said on here. What is it that you are trying to achieve? I am not trying to be mean but this thread is for us at childfree people to post about in a safe place, not for parents to come and tell us how we should feel.

oh god I’m not trying to tell anyone how to feel at all. It was just a article, and As it wa a about what others had said I found it interested that they said it was only other people saying things that they found the worst part doing what they wanted .

 

[FullFatWater2021]

Yes! why do they do this????
I never asked
One friend told me the labour room looked like an abattoir and she now rightly has ptsd
Another told me about them shoving the placenta back in
And another friend sends me pics of her sprogs napping green shit everywhere
She had dressed her baby to come see me and sent me a pic of the outfit in her shit and vomit.

and some people dare to ask why I don’t have kids

Yep I never asked either and hers was a similar scene from the sound of it. And the poonami stories are horrific too.

Not the life for me

 

[peachesandcreamz]

There’s a single by choice thread on here somewhere as well!

Perfect, thank you!!