jfc. hardly breaking news, was it? we all knew the greedy grellow monster - "i couldn't swap my advent calendar with steve's because that would be cruel....wouldn't it? i'm not a MONSTER!" yes babs, yes you are! - would end up swiping 🪜's advent calendar with some babshit excuse about how
she has already consumed the entire contents of her advent calendar and is finding it hard to keep deluding the babettes that she is opening each door for the first time hers slipped through her chunky trotters thus all the chocolates have fallen to the bottom which has ruined her
content
in reality, she just doesn't want to risk getting to day 15 and opning another empty door, because she prematurely dug out the creme egg chocolate. it was hardly a "debate" - far more likely that babs slyly swapped them over and CCO🪜 - that's an abbreviation of cardboard cut-out, my fingers are too cold to keep typing it in full! - is clueless, or she simply demanded that she take his for "werk" and ultimately, what babs wants, babs gets! 🪜 would have given his usual monotone grunt in reply, desperate to avoid being forced to deal with the a stomping tantrum from the overgrown grellow toddler, not even borthering to look from scrolling grinder to reply, while babs cackled with glee! jokes on her when she realised he's trolled her and already eaten a few chocolates from behind random doors to spite her - door number 21 looked suspiciously like it had already been opened!
and again, she has failed to grasp basic common sense - because sure, she has surpassed the ninth day of advent, but i'm pretty sure she hasn't yet had one of every possible chocolate. there may be nine different chocolates included, but she has had three (?) dairy milks, two creme egg twisted and now three - i think? - dairy milk caramels, plus an éclair, one crunchie, one dinky decker and obvs the fudge she dramatically threw across the room, only to drag herself out of her pit and gulp down anyway, because she isn't going to miss out on sugar! chocolate is chocolate - and calories don't count during advent!
awks how when i counted back thru chocolates in had listed, it actually totals 12! why do I know that! of all the things I need to remember, why the
duck has my brain retained that information?! what a sad little life, Alice.
but regardless of which chocolates she has already had, i'm pretty sure she hasn't yet had a wispa! she seems to think the contents of her calendar are going to be balanced equally, despite proving to herself that it's totally possible that she may have the same chocolate twice in a row. do all the heroes calendars in existence even have the exact same chocolate behind each door? i can't imagine living with someone so emotionally unstable that stealing chocolate from her husband is deemed "breaking news" and the environment is so manic and unpredictable that there wilis the potential you will be woken by SCREAM in the early hours, while it's still dark - either an expression of rabid joy or sheer disgust. babs could easily stop the unnecessary drama, shove an entire tub of cadburys heroes under her pit, close her eyes and dig her trotter into it each morning, and select a chocolate she actually likes - not that she would even need to close her eyes, since it's obvious she can barely see through them - plus she could also dig into her hidden stash at any point during the night when she's struggling to sleep, to help boost her energy levels and keep her
sugar withdrawal "asthma" symptoms at bay with a sugar fix - and then when she is left with a hoard of eclair and fudge leftovers, decide to be a hero and do some "good sharing" with 🪜 and the kids - that way, she may be rewarded by tat instead of coal in her stocking this year.
oh, really babs? maybe a sign that she should stop using that scrolling "breaking news" banner across stupid stories about advent calendars before checking the actual news - or at least scrolling SM and noticing that other people are referring to the tragedy so close to where she lives, and deciding she ought to jump on the bandwagon and mention it in a meaningless caption, all about how HER heart is broken - before posting such insensitive and thoughtless pit stories.
equally, she will quickly prove how little the incident has truly affected her, as in few minutes she will return to her stories with either an #ad, or the usual gurning and pouting and ranting and cackling manically about total babshit and christmas and "mum-ing". i'd rather she didn't mention the tragic deaths of those poor children - although ofc she didn't actually
mention it, more vaguely referred to it because death is too much of an "adult" topic for toddler babs - than slip a totally disingenuous obligatory caption in her stories amongst her usual manic laughter and babbling and polls. it's just words, and it's totally meaningless. it would only impact her if the tragedy had involved HER children, just as she proved when 🪜's father died and it didn't faze her, because wasn't HER dad.
and as much as i hate to even say this, i fully predict an incoming post under the guise of babs highlighting the dangers of playing on frozen lakes to all the toddler mums who rely on her for basic safety advice, along with some fabricated story about how she. as a young child. was out on a walk in winter. and ignored a "danger! thin ice!" sign. because she wanted to play ice skating. but she was lucky. as she was rescued. by nanny joyce. who discarded her own safety. and rushed across the ice. to save her beloved granddaughter. that, or a reflection on how LUCKY she is that although she lives in Brum, where lakes freeze in winter, she has never been in a situation where either of HER children fell thru the ice. just
no, babs. please. this is
not a situation to make all. about YOU. and it's a tingo i truly hope doesn't happen, because it will feel as rewarding as swallowing a full bottle of bleach.
over a bleeping advent calendar ! And a stupid rehashed reel!! I wish there was somewhere to complain about her content ( ya I know 
) content my ass. She is so inappropriate but why should I expect any different when she didn’t even let her own family grieve a loved one. I bleeping hate that stupid witch
she should for once think of others and the poor parents that won’t get chance to do this tonight not tell us how lucky Emma Conway is !!!! If it’s another I’ve got my dad and he’s in cracking health whilst you’ve lost yours Steve, then I will have to unfollow as morally I can’t stand such ignorance and selfishness not even to hate watch !!!
Shut the F Up 
