BeckiJones 4 #70 Her neck, her back, big fat gunt and flat arse crack 🎶

[kayefeluu20]

A few years back I met this girl on tinder and we hit it off. She invited me to her flat so I show up and it turns out she’s morbidly obese. Probably as big as Becki if not bigger but shaped differently. Anyway we are chatting and whatever and then she asks me to stay the night. I panic like fuck and tell her I will because she keeps being taken to A&E for trying to top herself and I don’t want to be responsible for that. Thankfully she then told me she’d never sleep with someone on the first date so genuinely all we did was sleep, but when she pulled her leggings down to sleep in her pants it absolutely fucking reeked of like musty old mushrooms and garlic.

I have no fucking clue why I’ve typed this out. My point is she was genuinely very pretty and funny but I still couldn’t sleep with her so I think I’d choose option A.

Anyway, I’m on citalopram.

I have a similar story except we went on a few dates first so I knew she was fat, and I wasn't bothered about her weight HOWEVER we went back to her flat and she had one of those walls of empty energy drink cans but instead of energy drink cans it was Pringles cans. Gave my vagina necrosis. Never saw her again. She was from Swindon which should've been red flag enough.

 

[LadyMarmalade]

Not to sound like a middle class wanker but I’M SORRY - ‘one of those walls of empty energy drink cans’

Is that a thing?!

It’s what the working class do instead of panelling x

 

[Sunshine and flowers]

Right YEAR 2 can you give me an expanded noun phrase to describe this pie? …. Yes, Becki “strong, flavoursome taste” .. well done

 

[kayefeluu20]

Okay I'm prefacing this with I know NOTHING about makeup, I don't wear it, never have. Not because Im nOt LIkE OThER GiRLs, purely because I don't have the patience to learn how to apply it properly lol

Anyway, I digress, my question to you makeup wearers and skin care folks is really quite simple. Are you supposed to still be ugly after you've applied it? Feel like she's missing some steps.

 

[Rach88]

Excellent thread title suggestion by @LloydsBoosters

No becki does not have special needs
We do not need to guess how much she weighs answer is too much

 

[gigilouxx]

Cant believe she gets too upset to be told that King Louis XIV’s dog is not feeling well yet hoovered up 3 starters at Frankie and Bennies the day she found out her dad had cancer

 

[gigi_93]

She’s so fucking useless, what does she actually do?? Seriously somebody tell me?? 31 years of age and doesn’t know the dog she lives in a house with is sick? I’d know if my animals were sick instantly, because I look after them. Fucking stupid giant useless toddler!! Cath is the worst enabler jfc get your house in order woman

 

[Brummiebird]

So kind of Lindt to send her those Valentine’s chocolates, they’re the only balls Becki will get to see.

 

[user726]

Absolute state of it

 

[bubblebar1317]

Becki cosplaying as rickets to get one of those sausages

 

[Gee_whip]

Becki approaches Rickets health issues the same way she does her own.. instead of going to the doctors (vets) for help, she just goes to the shop (or Pets at home) and buys treats to stuff him with. Eat until the pain stops lads! Someone on TikTok said when he dies will you include him in your recipes and it’s sent me

 

[Lonewolf]

Fuck sake look what my late night curiosity brought up hahaha

 

[gigilouxx]

It’s giving Peter Griffin

 

[Jennytea]

Becki when she watches kids at a dance competition..

 

[gigi_93]

Gal needs THERAPY. The whole putting the food into takeaway trays before you eat it is giving mental illness

 

[lyrical0609]

Weird that she said her mum didn’t want to tell her that rickets isn’t well. Doesn’t she look after her own dog? Or at least know how he is since she lives in the same house?

 

[Venom]

@goldie341 pissing myself at that video, I had to have a go

 

[hol20x]

That's the only ball she'll ever have slapping her in the arse that's for sure

 

[omgcupcakesbaby]

She has 17 links on and it looks like it needs at least another 3, at approximately 2.8inch per link I would estimate her waist measurement to be at least 56inches

 

[Diagoras20]

I got an email about Lithium today (I'm a nurse not just getting random emails about drugs) and at first I was trying to work out what word it actually was, then I realised it was actually Lithium, not a Beckified word