Tmpk Gossip Forum

TMPK #24 limp, lube, laugh Thread title is by @dietdodgers You win a partially used bottle of lube with one not so careful previous owner and a tupperware turd kofter. Enjoy Thread #23 began on April 28th. It ended 12th May The theme for it was 🤣🤣🤣 The headline was M licks his arse hole...

TMPK #23 M said... Thread title is by @dietdodgers You win a Lube, Laugh, Love wall art poster courtesy of @missdaisyjane Thread #22 began on April 19th. It ended Monday April 28th. The theme for it was haters. Again. Yawn. Living rent free in the abandoned pit that's his head. The...

Thread title is by @Darkobird84 You win a flame thrower for making your bagels. And a spare phone. For when you need to pretend something didn't happen. Thread #21 began on April 4th. It ended April 19 with a bang! The theme for it was lost phones and a Facebook return for the man that burns...

TMPK #21 The Curious Case of Paula D — John’s Budget Alter Ego Thread title is by @Darkobird84 Thread #20 began on March 20th. It ended Friday 4th April The theme for it was rinse and repeat, yet one more time. With added app sales. He's been like a woodpecker with the app. Easy money for a...

Thread title is by @Shielder2021 You win a burrito breakfast that was flame roasted. Thread #19 began on March 2nd. It ended March 20th The theme for it was rinse and repeat yet again. With added delusion. The headline was him and M house hunting as he decided whether or not they should live...

Thread title is by @Weefa You win a genuine five star review on Trustpilot and a burrito meal prep but only if you can find one. Thread #18 began on February 15th. It ended March 2nd. The theme for it was rinse and repeat The headline was abusing females in DM's, dirty deleting and he actually...

Thread title is by me but it's more of a team effort lads because we all wanted Preston Dicks in it. We all win a share of the left over Prozis crap he is no longer shilling but is very likely piled up in his Monica cupboard under the stairs and no doubt why he's having 500 cal protein shakes a...

Thread title is by @haxlerl You win a set of weighing scales that tell you that you've lost 2.5 pounds every single week no matter what you eat. Magic. Thread #16 began on January 18th and him in sales mode for the app that shall never be discounted ever again but constantly is. Thread ended...

New Thread title is from @itsmellsinhere Was such a wild time on the previous thread it was a tough to nail it to one so well done and you win a filthy furry baking tray and a sandwich made with an entire packet of sausages and three Cornetto's for dessert. Enjoy. John remains and is a con man...

TMPK #15. On a betting bender with the 'no meal prep' offender Thread title with most votes is from me. I win a Matchbox RS6 and some mouldy butter - the last thread begins on Halloween with him declaring he's recognising he could be doing more. So he will. He wants to be somewhere else in six...

TMPK #14. The meal pinching Kernel Thread title is from @party_pigeon You win a fictional Audi RS6. Go rev it outside his hamster cage and do donuts on his fake lawn 😜 - Allegedly starting a new business but it's top secret. We give no shits as it's unlikely to be anything in the end or an old...

Thread title is from @ohcomeon99 in collaboration with myself We win a chandelier and a giant protein jelly which we'll eat in our rented meeting room whilst starting a business. Maybe. Perhaps we'll just take home the free pen. - headline - Random post on a Friday night (17/8/24) for a go fund...

Thread title is from me I win a bespoke build teeny tiny cupboard that's only big enough to store paperclips. - headline - the world's most boring account bored on for longer. And in case you were wondering, he's not arsed. Read on to discover how very not arsed he really isn't whilst all...

Thread title is from me and was a suggestion from ages ago. I win a box of chemical and ultra processed powders from his new undeclared collab and a calendar printout. Just cross off days I didn't buy a takeaway and the weight will fall off apparently. Magic. - headline - the world's most...

Thread title is from @Chiefcook&bottlewasher You win a respite from the thread to ease the tedium of TMPK's own unique brand of boring monotony - a boring beginning. Sales sales sales. - plenty of boring whinging about proving his identity for the mortgage. Get over it John and welcome to the...

Thread title is from @Hereforastalk You win a set of glass meal prep containers (best money can buy apparently) that we found knocking about (fed up of tripping over on the floor because we didn't put it away). This offer can and absolutely will be withdrawn at any time. In fact by the time...

Thread title is from @Mabels1986 You win a year's subscription to the untested app (at the time of writing its unclear what it's worth because his pricing structure can only be described as 'chaotic and made up') and a crap planner you'll need a wheel barrow to carry around. Thread summary...

He’s lazy, he lies and thick as a plank. Nothing left in his life but a dog named Frank Thread title is from @ghostriderhere You win a kebab and a cold shower. Make sure to shout at us about how 'amaaaazin' they were. Thread summary. - Back from his NC500 trip and immediately abandoned his...

Thread title is from @rabbitinheadlights You win a giant kebab: the type they have in a kebab shop. Whilst you eat it, remember to kid on about your weightloss and near perfect motivation whilst telling us words can't do it justice. Thread summary. Repetitive sales and marketing stories on the...

Thread title is a joint effort. Suggestions from @g15maa @itsmellsinhere and @haxlerl to complete it. You all win a set of TMP🤡 glass containers with a lifetime guarantee and don't forget to celebrate by having two tubs of ice cream for breakfast 🍦🍧 Thread summary. I don't need to labour here...

New thread time. Thanks to @haxlerl for the inspired post about the April fool.

Unable to find a thread title suggestion, the last one moved fast at the end, sorry all. Can someone thread recap?

The second thread title winner was suggested by @AliceWondersxo A set of overly engineered and expensive glass meal prep containers for our winner. Arriving in the TMPK amazon shop to collect on the 12th of never 😂 TMPK also known as TMDK (the melt down king) has shown himself to be (and...

I’ve followed John from the start but this last weekend he has lost it. Insulting everyone from his ex girlfriend Charlotte, calling her fat and lazy. Insulting nurses, single mother’s and anyone who does a 9-5 job as nobody matches him…..Mr Perfect. Single Mothers are lazy and probably have...