What’s annoying you right now #10

[Pesky Tarian]

My new sofa arrived at 6.45 .....and it's the wrong colour. Guess I'll be spending all day on the phone to customer services.

 

[pinkmug]

Being the eldest daughter and having to perform as the emotional support pet for everyone in the family. Sick to the back teeth of constantly having to be available and present.

 

[Don'tlookEthel]

Automatic flushes that are detonated because you dared to move slightly whilst still sat on the toilet, unceremoniously dousing your flange in cold toilet water!
Place the sensor higher!

 

[watermelon sugar]

Wow. At my workplace you would actually be able to report her to HR and she'd be pretty fucked.

I hate when people mention weight, diets at the workplace. You never know who's going through what. Someone might have an ED, someone could be on life saving medication that makes them gain weight. Ultimately nobody gives a fuck what you're eating or not eating, whether you're working out or not. Attention seekers like that deserve to be told off.

I'm sure you're lovely @watermelon sugar , at any and every weight point. And you've literally grown a human. So you already have a perfect body that did all that (perfect in the health sense which is the only sense that matters).

Thank you so much! I just feel like it was really unwarranted advice and just no need. I also hate discussion of weight/diet/gym should have no place in the workplace cos like you said you don’t know what people are going through but I feel like it’s one of those topics that people just use cos it’s something to talk about but still no need! Talk about your journey and your diet don’t criticise others whilst you’re doing it

 

[Rainbow1]

On our local village Facebook page where people put items up for sale saying
‘Message for price if interested’
It’s not some bloody heirloom to be sold to elite clientele, it’s just a £20 bedside lamp from Dunelm Susan

 

[Fancyfeathers]

People who think that me being lonely is my fault and I’m to blame if I don’t reach out to so called friends who haven’t gave a care in the world about me for the past year despite me reaching out. I get I’m due for a life of loneliness due to my anxiety and agoraphobia but just don’t need reminding it’s my fault

sorry it’s not a sympathy vote just a rant that’s all

 

[Tanne1999]

So tired of people not staying home when they're ill. "Don't worry, it's not covid". Oh great, cause I don't want your covid but I totally want your stupid bronchitis.

Someone tried to sit next to me on the bus yesterday with a mask on, coughing and wheezing. I said ‘sorry do you mind sitting elsewhere, I’ve got asthma so don’t want to catch whatever you have’. Bear in mind there was empty seats at the back where she didn’t need to sit near anyone. She told me ‘god it’s only Covid, it won’t kill you’.

 

[holly1727373!3]

My mum died last month and the weekend after she died my friend asked me if I’d like to go shopping that day to take my mind off things, I said yeah and she just blanked me. I had bigger things going on so I just wrote it off as something weird and forgot about it.

Said friend didn’t bother with me for the next couple of weeks after that until she was off work sick and bored. She repeatedly spammed me with messages and would spam me on another app if I didn’t reply within ten minutes, even when I explained that I didn’t feel like talking due to being upset about my mum. The things she wanted to talk about weren’t important, just silly things that weren’t important to anyone and did not require me to be spammed. It lasted the two days she was off sick stressed me out quite a bit. I went to the supermarket so of course I didn’t reply to her texts, only to be met with ‘Why have you gone to the shop?’ And when i replied saying I needed food, she replied with a bad attitude. Again I just ignored it because she’s always been a very needy friend.

Then she arranges to come to see me on Saturday. I cancelled plans with my sister to see her instead and at 10am that morning she told me she’d be coming to my house at 2pm. Then it was radio silence. I saw that she was elsewhere with another friend of hers instead. But I didn’t say anything as although I was annoyed, I couldn’t be bothered to make a situation out of it.

Until later that night when she asked me to go out with her and this random friend. I said no and she once again kept spamming me trying to get me to go. Calling me a pussy, etc. And so I explained that she was taking the piss a bit when she didn’t even tell me she’d had a change of plans earlier that day. She said it slipped her mind and I didn’t respond as I couldn’t be bothered with all the palava.

Then all night I’m getting spammed with her ‘apologies’ although they really weren’t apologies. Instead she tried to ‘one-up’ my mum’s death by mentioning a situation that wasn’t at all relevant or anywhere near the same. Once again, I asked her to just stop messaging me as I didn’t have the energy to deal with it. But the spamming lasted all night and into the next day. When she sent another message to say how upset she was but there was still no real apology or acknowledgment of her own behaviour. So I snapped, I told her that I didn’t care about her feelings when she was minimising my feelings towards the loss of my mother and acting like I should be getting over things just because she wasn’t upset by my loss. It’s so frustrating as I’m a really low maintenance friend and I really wouldn’t have been bothered in either situation if she’d just text to say she had changed her mind.

I’ve constantly been there for her throughout her ‘problems’ which are never really problems and instead just stupid situations she’s put herself in. She expects your full attention whenever she demands it and is very draining but we do have a lot of good memories together too. Her victim complex is insane.

I’m particularly upset about her trying to one up my mums death. And now she’s gone full on ‘be kind’, constantly posting stories with infographics about checking in on your friends and being being kind to people, as if that isn’t the exact opposite of what she did to me. I know she’ll have twisted the situation to make me look like a bad person with out mutual friends. It’s just really frustrating, especially at a time when I’m grieving.

 

[TheShire]

People confusing gossip with crazy conspiracy theories. Two different things!

 

[QueenBW]

My coworker was selected for a big project in another country that I was more qualified for. But he's a man. And those choosing are men. So. Yeah. The Boyz Club wins again.

 

[malibu skies]

The hypocrisy of people talking about mental health and “reach out if you want to talk” but then not giving a fuck when you actually do reach out.

 

[pinksunsetx91]

My toxic as fuck family and the way they have to be making digs or bitching. Such a bitter atmosphere

 

[Hollie Day]

Watching a documentary about sharks and all of a sudden partner is a shark expert non stop talking over the narration of a marine biologist with decades of experience.

 

[Don'tlookEthel]

I am in hospital and the woman in the next bed is snoring so loudly, and I can't give her a nudge and tell her "for fucks sake will you roll on to your side" or sod off and sleep in my kids bed like I would at home. I have ear plugs but they're no match for that nose!

 

[puzzlehead]

Someone nearby has been letting of fireworks but only lets one off every 10-15 mins so first one woke my toddler up then as he’s starting to settle down to go back to sleep another one goes off.

 

[houdini]

I’m so tired and I just wish I had a partner who willingly offered me a break from our child. I always have to ask and it feels like I’m such an inconvenience

 

[QueenBW]

My friend, but it is more upsetting than annoying.

We've been friends for almost 20 years, and we used to live near to each other and saw each other every day. For the past 16 years or so we have not lived close to each other but still kept in touch all the time and would stay at each other's house throughout the year, go on holiday together, day trips etc. We were close and it was a great friendship, we never had a cross word to say to each other and supported each other through difficult times.

A few years ago I noticed she was a bit distant. She'd not reply to text messages for a long time, and then come back and apologise saying it was hectic with moving etc. I gave her the benefit of the doubt and thought once things had settled down normal communication would resume.

Fast forward a year and a bit and it hasn't. I send her a message and it is left unread for months. For her birthday I sent a card and a text, she replied to the text the next day thanking me and asking how I am, I replied and she left it unread for two months.

It feels like the only time she really gets back to me now is when she has something to tell me. New house, getting married, baby etc. Yet whenever I reply it goes unanswered. She's stopped making an excuse now and will not even address my past text messages or why she's not replied in so long, she will instead just give her update.

She messaged me a few days ago with more news and ended by saying "I feel like I haven't seen you in ages ."

It's true, we haven't. I'd love to go and visit her but I barely ever hear from her. Before when she would ask how I was I'd be honest and give her an update on what's going on in my life etc but it hurt when she didn't even acknowledge my replies so whenever she asks now I just say "I'm fine thank you, how are you?" She doesn't really know anything about my life / me anymore. She tells me all what's going on with her but she has nothing to ask me about, she just asks how work is and generic things.

I'm trying to think of how to reply to the message but haven't found the right words yet.

I'm sorry this happened to you, it sounds like you're a good friend that remains involved and supportive no matter the distance and she hasn't reciprocated.

You didn't ask for advice or anything but I've been there a couple of times. In the end you have to decide whether you keep going as is and keep a semblance of a friendship that is completely one sided and makes you feel bad,: you let it go too and stop responding as well and either she reacts or the friendship ends quietly; or you openly tell her that you've noticed her only messaging when it involves her and never caring to ask about your life beyond banalities and how it's made you feel. And she either takes responsibility and does better or the friendship ends.

It sounds like what you have right now isn't a real friendship either so I'd say just be honest with her and let the chips fall as they will. You've got nothing to lose since your friend isn't acting like one anyways.

 

[Hollie Day]

Received a message from my son's nursery detailing that on friday, for a lunchtime trek through the woods 'we suggest just a small packed lunch of 'sammies, crisps, and a drink'.
When I asked what 'sammies' were they responded with 'sandwiches of course' followed by this emoji

So bloody rude!! ...or maybe I'm just over sensitive

 

[hytuhh]

My mum died last month and the weekend after she died my friend asked me if I’d like to go shopping that day to take my mind off things, I said yeah and she just blanked me. I had bigger things going on so I just wrote it off as something weird and forgot about it.

Said friend didn’t bother with me for the next couple of weeks after that until she was off work sick and bored. She repeatedly spammed me with messages and would spam me on another app if I didn’t reply within ten minutes, even when I explained that I didn’t feel like talking due to being upset about my mum. The things she wanted to talk about weren’t important, just silly things that weren’t important to anyone and did not require me to be spammed. It lasted the two days she was off sick stressed me out quite a bit. I went to the supermarket so of course I didn’t reply to her texts, only to be met with ‘Why have you gone to the shop?’ And when i replied saying I needed food, she replied with a bad attitude. Again I just ignored it because she’s always been a very needy friend.

Then she arranges to come to see me on Saturday. I cancelled plans with my sister to see her instead and at 10am that morning she told me she’d be coming to my house at 2pm. Then it was radio silence. I saw that she was elsewhere with another friend of hers instead. But I didn’t say anything as although I was annoyed, I couldn’t be bothered to make a situation out of it.

Until later that night when she asked me to go out with her and this random friend. I said no and she once again kept spamming me trying to get me to go. Calling me a pussy, etc. And so I explained that she was taking the piss a bit when she didn’t even tell me she’d had a change of plans earlier that day. She said it slipped her mind and I didn’t respond as I couldn’t be bothered with all the palava.

Then all night I’m getting spammed with her ‘apologies’ although they really weren’t apologies. Instead she tried to ‘one-up’ my mum’s death by mentioning a situation that wasn’t at all relevant or anywhere near the same. Once again, I asked her to just stop messaging me as I didn’t have the energy to deal with it. But the spamming lasted all night and into the next day. When she sent another message to say how upset she was but there was still no real apology or acknowledgment of her own behaviour. So I snapped, I told her that I didn’t care about her feelings when she was minimising my feelings towards the loss of my mother and acting like I should be getting over things just because she wasn’t upset by my loss. It’s so frustrating as I’m a really low maintenance friend and I really wouldn’t have been bothered in either situation if she’d just text to say she had changed her mind.

I’ve constantly been there for her throughout her ‘problems’ which are never really problems and instead just stupid situations she’s put herself in. She expects your full attention whenever she demands it and is very draining but we do have a lot of good memories together too. Her victim complex is insane.

I’m particularly upset about her trying to one up my mums death. And now she’s gone full on ‘be kind’, constantly posting stories with infographics about checking in on your friends and being being kind to people, as if that isn’t the exact opposite of what she did to me. I know she’ll have twisted the situation to make me look like a bad person with out mutual friends. It’s just really frustrating, especially at a time when I’m grieving.

I'm sorry to hear about your mum, I hope you're doing as okay as you can be.

In response to this, this person is not your friend. They don't sound like they even have the capacity to think of anyone but themselves. The initial reach out of wanting to go shopping to take your mind off things was sweet but it was all downhill from there and the fact that you're actually spending time thinking about this situation when you've just experienced a loss in your life is not good. Your energy needs to be spent around people who truly value and care about you, and some people literally don't have the capacity sometimes.
I had a very entitled friend like this and eventually I just had to cut them off. You can't be the victim in every situation, it's draining and exhausting. Being there for someone else will not kill you. Also the posting of how to be a good friend and being kind - is your friend my ex friend cut your losses and cut them out in my opinion. You don't owe an explanation and you need to focus on yourself and your journey.

 

[Tanne1999]

Clothing sizes!! Pair of jeans from one shop, size 16 fits perfect. Size 20 in another, can’t get it over my thighs!!!! No wonder so many people, (myself included), feel awful about themselves!