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This made me HOWL!!
I think ALL of us have those regrets. My “wish I had not been so down on myself” when younger ties into this. I had the BIGGEST crush on a boy at school. Into same music, smart, skater and had the most intense blue eyes. I hid it from everyone. Now as an adult with confidence I now see that he totally would have.
Still see those beautiful eyes! They were incredible honestly.
I moved out at 19 and always wonder why I did it. I had my own room, en suite and living area at my mums. My flat wasnt much bigger! Wish I had stayed longer to save some more money up.
Also I wish I had traveled abit pre kids. I had my first at 22. Me and my partner have said after this lock down once a year we will be going away for long weekends-week long trips with out the kids.
We always take them away at least twice a year so it's not like they will be missing out.
We have also got that chance to go to aus as a friends emergrating there so will be going for three weeks with the kids. They are really good friends and know they are more than capable to looking after the kids if we want to do something with out them.
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Herefortheteeeee
Well-known member
We also have a lot more time to think at the moment. I have found deleting and blocking people on fb helps. It helps my mental health. If that isn’t possible, then I unfollow. I soon forget about them. Maybe in a few months I remember but long term, it helps xSounds like you had an amazing friendship and it's so nice you have many memories to cherish
No i haven't had it from having kids, but it's such a shame that your friend has done that after everything! Mine is from loads of different friendship groups from school age ones to one's not so long ago where it just seems to be me that's not part of it anymore, I just wonder what it is I do to push these people awayit's not like I've fallen out with anyone. I am having a bit of a shit year and I think it's bothering me more because I'm realising how much life is to short for it all x
Renegadedancer
VIP Member
I hear you :-(This made me HOWL!!
I think ALL of us have those regrets. My “wish I had not been so down on myself” when younger ties into this. I had the BIGGEST crush on a boy at school. Into same music, smart, skater and had the most intense blue eyes. Hid it from everyone. Now as an adult with confidence I now see that he totally would have.
Still see those beautiful eyes! They were incredible honestly.
bubbadabut
VIP Member
Aww it's an incredible city. I knew it was the place for me immediately after arriving. Never had that feeling anywhere else before or since. I would feel weird even visiting there now. I miss it so much. I was Google-mapping some of the sites and showing my kids only yesterday, but my life is so different now, husband, kids etc that I think being there wouldn't be the same as it was when I was young, free and single.
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I would say exactly the same. My son is now six and it's been lovely to spend that extra time with him. Even though his back at school a couple of days it's just nice to be able to pick him up.I had to do the same and regret that however this time in lockdown with just my 4 year old and me I feel like I’ve now made up for that time I missed when he went to nursery so Young and we’ve had an extra change of a few months at home together. Probably the only positive out of lockdown!
Wow, well done. That's amazing
I've just finished my level 5 management qualification. I didnt struggle academically. I just cant apply my self, I was like it at school and seemed to have got worse as I've got older.
realhousewivewannabe
VIP Member
Some books you could get to give you the strength and courage - what a time to be alone, what would Alice do? Bitch up expect more get more (all of them by Leslie braswell) you deserve soo much more than settling (from a person who settled) xx
charlie6578
Active member
There’s a few things that come to mind
- staying with my ex too long during my teenage years wasted way too much time
- not saving enough money, wasting it on clothes/makeup doesn’t make you happy in the long run
- being too hard on myself in school, I was so self conscious and hated the way I looked, if I could go back in time I’d tell myself not to care what anyone else thinks and stop letting people push you around
- going straight to university after school, I was only just 18 moved away from home to do a course I didn’t even want to do. I’ve got a degree in something else now but I wish I’d taken a year out to decide what I wanted to do first
- not spending enough time with my grandparents and listening properly to all their stories. At the time I felt like they’d be around forever now I regret not asking more questions about their lives
- staying with my ex too long during my teenage years wasted way too much time
- not saving enough money, wasting it on clothes/makeup doesn’t make you happy in the long run
- being too hard on myself in school, I was so self conscious and hated the way I looked, if I could go back in time I’d tell myself not to care what anyone else thinks and stop letting people push you around
- going straight to university after school, I was only just 18 moved away from home to do a course I didn’t even want to do. I’ve got a degree in something else now but I wish I’d taken a year out to decide what I wanted to do first
- not spending enough time with my grandparents and listening properly to all their stories. At the time I felt like they’d be around forever now I regret not asking more questions about their lives
emerald
VIP Member
I don't know how old you are but loads of people retrain to become midwives in their 40s and 50s. You still have loads of time left before pension age you can do it!I really regret not having a career before kids. I had them young, due to health reasons. Always wanted to be a midwife, had a place to start when my little girl was 2, and my dad told me it was ridiculous - I was 23. Now 5 kids later, I’m still trying to figure it out.
Also, my last babies were born very prem And our daughter only lived for 3 days. Her brother is now 4, and has mild cerebral palsy - he’s absolutely amazing and honestly I wouldn’t change a single thing about him - and he couldn’t give two hoots about his rubbish balance, he loves life more than anyone I’ve ever met and delights in the most brilliant things, like swimming in the sea or playing on the beach or in the woods - he truly means the whole world to me, he’s my inspiration - but I’ll always blame myself for the fact he doesn’t have his twin here, and that he will have struggles in his life because I couldn’t keep him safe
annanuttall
VIP Member
Thank you. I wasn't feeling very confident in the first place and I think this person found that weakness and used it for their own gain. Management was very much on that person side and they never came to me for help. I should have stood my ground both with this person and my management. I also have noticed that after I left not many people stuck around for very long.
realhousewivewannabe
VIP Member
oh bless you! I went through something similar but I took them to hr and got a little payout. It was my first job after university and i was signed off for 6 months. Took me another 6 months to then find another job.
I hope you find something you love soon
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This is me, and it’s actually really comforting reading everyone’s posts on this. I’ve spent since around 12 years old with body dysmorphia and have been in therapy for it but it wasn’t much help. It’s completely life consuming and exhausting. I look at photos when I felt my worst a few years back and I was thin af. Knowing it’s completely ridiculous and I’m not the beached whale I think I am, I still feel like I can’t fully enjoy life because of these stupid thoughts. It affects everything from your social life to even your performance at work because you’re so consumed by the perception of yourself.
Another one is losing touch with a childhood best friend who commited suicide a couple of years back.
Savewaterdrinkgin
Chatty Member
Lots of things unfortunately, main ones:
Not getting a chance to tell someone important to me that I was in love with him before he died
Moving away from my home town to a place I’m now miserable in but we’re trapped until my children finish school
Not having another baby
Staying in a job longer than I should have which effected my mental health
Not getting a chance to tell someone important to me that I was in love with him before he died
Moving away from my home town to a place I’m now miserable in but we’re trapped until my children finish school
Not having another baby
Staying in a job longer than I should have which effected my mental health
TruffleTrifle
Well-known member
I regret tanking my A level exams. I had great coursework marks but I turned 18 just before final A2 exams and that finally being able to go out bevving was more interesting than studying. I’d pushed myself for 2 years but couldn’t push that last month. Didn’t get into my 1st choice uni. But, if I hadn’t gone to my current uni I wouldn’t have met my amazing partner. So swings and roundabouts.
Regret not learning to drive sooner. I can now but it was a long slog and I spent 2 years commuting to another city via public transport which was just horrible.
i spent a lot of 2015/2016 depressed and regret not pulling myself out of it sooner.
I regret waiting until last year to get properly healthy, having blood tests to check my intolerances and exercising every day. I feel so much better and I hate that it took me til now to sort it as I feel like I wasted so much time on being unhealthy but hating my body.
regret my credit card spending. Working my way out of it now but it’s hard. I’m worried about buying a house.
Regret not learning to drive sooner. I can now but it was a long slog and I spent 2 years commuting to another city via public transport which was just horrible.
i spent a lot of 2015/2016 depressed and regret not pulling myself out of it sooner.
I regret waiting until last year to get properly healthy, having blood tests to check my intolerances and exercising every day. I feel so much better and I hate that it took me til now to sort it as I feel like I wasted so much time on being unhealthy but hating my body.
regret my credit card spending. Working my way out of it now but it’s hard. I’m worried about buying a house.
CrackRatcher
Chatty Member
Staying in my job because it’s the only hours that work around kids been in school.. I’m so unhappy it’s unreal..
Bitofthebubbly
VIP Member
I wish I’d carried on playing football instead of giving it up when I was 16. I wasn’t even that good, but it was so dear to my heart throughout my teens, I truly loved it and was passionate. Not felt like that about a hobby since then. It was the one thing I would look forward to every week, I took it seriously but not so much so despite all the challenges I had with it, then one day I just decided I wasn’t going to carry on anymore. I feel if I’d have carried it on it would have helped me maintain some sense of self confidence which seems to have all but disappeared these days after having kids and general life. This one is probably my biggest one yet if I’m honest but seems quite small I comparison to others.