I’m laughing at your description not that you’re poorly. It sounds like that scene from BridesmaidsI have caught a stomach bug from somewhere. I honestly thought I was going to die on the bathroom floor last night.
Today my stomach is in agony, I'm sweating, feel like my guts are going to fall out my arse. Surviving on sips of water. Middle child just came and said he's bored and could I play catch with him.
Mate, I wish I was fucking bored.
Told him (politely) to leave me alone and play with his 2 siblings, the exact reason we had siblings