Unpopular Opinions #25

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No but that has nothing to do with what my original post was about. I was purely talking about constantly providing kids with paid activities, like taking them to a cinema or bowling. Surely someone who can do that must have enough time off to actually go
Maybe the parent actually enjoys those things themselves.
 
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That may be your ‘opinion’, but it’s medically inaccurate. Hence the language change to be more inclusive, recognising the myriad of people who have periods and women who don’t have periods. I had a hysterectomy a couple of years ago, therefore I don’t bleed. Does that make me not a woman? No. But the inters3x child at my son’s school who does have periods, does that make them a woman? No.
Language changing to be more inclusive does not mean that it excludes others - it’s not pie. You don’t get less of something.

How is it medically not accurate? So you’re telling me the anatomy and biology of women is wrong! 🤔 It is only women who bleed and have periods.

If you had a hysterectomy and do not bleed you are a still a WOMAN who had a hysterectomy because last time I checked the definition of a hysterectomy is a surgical procedure to removed the uterus. Do people have uteri? NO! Women have uteri! Not men. Women. FYI, it is not my opinion. It is FACT.

Post procedure (of a hysterectomy) you are still a woman so not quite sure what point you are trying to make. Do people produce sperm? No. Men do. Do people have erectile dysfunction? No. Me do. It is the anatomy and biology of a man. I do not see the language changing for men so why should it for women!
 
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Its very OK to criticise a national institution like the NHS if its failed you. So fed up with people blocking you from talking about your experience and only letting positive experiences sit. That's the very reason its allowed to be run into the ground because everyone is defending and protecting it rather than demanding things change.
Nye Bevan would spin in his grave if he knew what we have allowed to be done to his greatest achievement.
 
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I agree with the parents not letting kids be bored.

i’ll admit the first 2 weeks of the summer holidays i was one of them, mainly because i felt bad that everyone else around me was going out and about doing things. I then realised i can’t afford this and my kid who is 4 doesn’t even bleeping know what others are doing 🤣 and you know what its been great, we go for a small walk or playground and woods most days but i dont feel pressure to do paid activities and she just has fun making up games in the garden or doing stuff at home.

I do now realise kids need to be bored sometimes. We’re so used to having constant entertainment shoved in our faces that people don’t know what to do without that hit.
 
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It’s fine for people to criticise the NHS. Everyone has an opinion and should be free to state that opinion.

That said, it’s also fine to openly disagree with said criticism. After all, freedom of speech should apply to all.
 
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as a childless person, have you simply considered leaving your 5 year old alone in the house à la Matilda?

but yeah, I always wonder this - if parents are working 5 days a week, don’t have extended family, don’t have the money for holiday camps and struggle to get days off, wtf are they supposed to do during a 6 or 9 week holiday? Even if you have two parents working different shifts, there will be crossover and it’s not like everyone can just get a childcare friendly job. My parents worked in schools so it was fine, and often had other people’s kids come to our house for the day if they were stuck, but it must have been so stressful to organise!?




I see a lot of Instagram mums who have the time to spend with their kids seem really afraid of letting them getting bored - as if that’s the worst possible thing that could happen? Or they make play really structured and just want to keep them constantly busy - but they don’t actually let them choose what they want to do or give them the opportunity to be bored.
While I do agree that it’s good for children to learn about boredom and ways to amuse themselves, some children are absolutely chaotic without structure and cannot “play” on their own. I’ve mentioned it loads (sounding like a broken record now) but my young children are neurodivergent and require a lot of adult support in playing both on their own and in a group. It’s not as easy as just letting them outside to do what they like. Times have also changed, parents are less trusting to just let their children come and go like we used to and there isn’t that same sense of community as there was back in those days.

I also agree though that it doesn’t have to be expensive. We do a lot of park days, trips to the beach when the weather is good, even getting the paddling pool and toys out in the garden - all at little to no expense. We do enjoy cinema days and days out when we can afford it because we don’t always go on holiday so it makes it feel a bit more special.
 
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While I do agree that it’s good for children to learn about boredom and ways to amuse themselves, some children are absolutely chaotic without structure and cannot “play” on their own. I’ve mentioned it loads (sounding like a broken record now) but my young children are neurodivergent and require a lot of adult support in playing both on their own and in a group. It’s not as easy as just letting them outside to do what they like. Times have also changed, parents are less trusting to just let their children come and go like we used to and there isn’t that same sense of community as there was back in those days.

I also agree though that it doesn’t have to be expensive. We do a lot of park days, trips to the beach when the weather is good, even getting the paddling pool and toys out in the garden - all at little to no expense. We do enjoy cinema days and days out when we can afford it because we don’t always go on holiday so it makes it feel a bit more special.
oh you’re absolutely right, thank you for adding that. I should’ve been more inclusive when discussing this - it’s definitely not one solution for all and depends on each child and their needs!
 
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It’s fine for people to criticise the NHS. Everyone has an opinion and should be free to state that opinion.

That said, it’s also fine to openly disagree with said criticism. After all, freedom of speech should apply to all.
I agree... but to tell people this isn't the time or place when dozens of stories praising the NHS is the time and place, isn't OK, its shutting one side down.
 
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I agree... but to tell people this isn't the time or place when dozens of stories praising the NHS is the time and place isn't OK its shutting one side down.
agreed, I cannot talk about my traumatic experiences because people rush to defend the NHS and minimise what I went through. it’s always people who haven’t got complex, under researched and misunderstood conditions. Tbh I was the same before I became ill!

The NHS is usually a good experience if you have a straight forward diagnosis that can then be treated with xyz, but the moment you experience chronic symptoms that don’t show up on tests, you’re left to bleeping rot. I’ve been dehumanised and discriminated against and it gets worse the longer I don’t respond to treatment. If your health follows a nice trajectory of symptoms > test results > treatment > cured then it is fit for purpose. Any deviation from that and that’s when the issues start and I can be grateful for the NHS whilst also not being OK with medical negligence 🥲
 
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Why is it different though? Totally get that, might eat my words if I do have kids but how is spending tons of money on taking kids to expensive activities a requirement these days? Would really like to know what's changed that this is now a thing
The only thing that’s free is the park and it’s bleeping boring 😂
 
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The only thing that’s free is the park and it’s bleeping boring 😂
I take my grandchildren to places like this for the day. its free

 
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People rushing into relationships and having kids with each partner they have. I can't imagine what arranging access must be like, kids must not know if they are coming or going.
 
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People rushing into relationships and having kids with each partner they have. I can't imagine what arranging access must be like, kids must not know if they are coming or going.
Must be hard for the children with a bad dad watching those with a good dad going away on weekends or holidays or Christmas. birthday etc

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agreed, I cannot talk about my traumatic experiences because people rush to defend the NHS and minimise what I went through. it’s always people who haven’t got complex, under researched and misunderstood conditions. Tbh I was the same before I became ill!

The NHS is usually a good experience if you have a straight forward diagnosis that can then be treated with xyz, but the moment you experience chronic symptoms that don’t show up on tests, you’re left to bleeping rot. I’ve been dehumanised and discriminated against and it gets worse the longer I don’t respond to treatment. If your health follows a nice trajectory of symptoms > test results > treatment > cured then it is fit for purpose. Any deviation from that and that’s when the issues start and I can be grateful for the NHS whilst also not being OK with medical negligence 🥲
I have good stories, bad stories and horror stories but only allowed in most cases to talk about the good. as you say, if you try and talk about the bad ,everyone rushes to defend. like you or your experiences doesn't count.
 
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There's still lots of museums, lidos, libraries, the beach, a few of the national trust homes are open too even if you're not a member.
If you’re not too far away or have a way to get to those places

I do wonder whether some parents complain for the sake of complaining tbh and because they might not get the usual parenting break as kids are home. We seem to sort of love to hate technology when it comes to kids but it’s useful
 
I agree... but to tell people this isn't the time or place when dozens of stories praising the NHS is the time and place, isn't OK, its shutting one side down.
Yep I agree with that. This is a general comment that doesn't apply to anyone here, more from my 'real life' experience, but sometimes people have a big downer on the NHS because of a bad experience they had, and then they slate all of the NHS and run it down at every opportunity.

While I fully understand why they may feel that way, it can sometimes be unfair. I've got an uncle who thinks nothing of doing it in front of my sister in law who's a nurse. My SIL keeps quiet, but I know she's been hurt by a few things this relative has said/implied. It's like he sees her as "the enemy" because she works for an organisation whose name is mud in his house.

I sometimes see it on local Facebook groups as well - especially about our local doctors surgery who do a good job IMO - and the ones complaining are the hypochondriacs who clog up the phone lines and don't have much wrong with them, yet seem to get an appointment at least weekly. They can't see they're part of the reason why it's not easy for others to get appointments.

So, like I say, it's not aimed at anyone here - just more me having a rant!
 
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There's still lots of museums, libraries, the beach, a few of the national trust homes are open too even if you're not a member.
Our closest beach is an hour away and it’s pebble. The museums are not free, they are free entry but a lot of the exhibitions are paid for ones. The science museum had a power up exhibition a few months ago which my son loved as it was all games consoles ever created but it wasn’t free entry, plus there’s the cost of travel getting to the museum, snacks etc. kids are always hungry & thirsty. We visit the local library every so often but that’s really jot enough activity to keep little ones entertained for the summer holidays.

I have no issue with spending money on days out, I’m just explaining to the original person who asked the question of why parents spend loads of money - it’s because free days out are far and few between and listening to my son moan all day is enough to drive me insaneeeee.

obvz we get the paddling pool out, have garden days, go for walks but to break the holidays up days out are required and they cost a lot of money.
 
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I came to leave an unpopular opinion but then I saw people further discussing and arguing over their unpopular opinions so now I’m exiting 🤣
 
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We visit the local library every so often but that’s really jot enough activity to keep little ones entertained for the summer holidays.
It also probably sucks that libraries have become a lot less active. I don't think my local one really does anything and they've generally lost a lot of space. I know some larger ones in other cities but they mostly seem to run events for the elderly, might have changed with the holidays

On a more positive note, I have seen that the local church has been running frequent events for children that don't seem totally boring or have a religious focus to them
 
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