The Chateau Diaries #82 The Tale of Philip, the châteausexual Hedgehog

[MsPitstop]

I'm Gen X, "The Forgotten Generation." It's fine- we like being in the shadows- we're a bunch of resilient latch-key survivors (except for Fanny). I do chuckle at the Boomer vs Millenial stuff (they are the same), and Gen Zs express, "The 80s was amazing! I wish I grew up back then!" Oh no, bebays, you would not survive a day in the 80s! No one had computers, cell phones, Amazon, credit cards, Instagram, parents (parents were more like adult people who just lived in your house- they had no real interest in what you were actually doing because they had their own lives- "just stay out of jail"), and it wasn't cool to be nor act gay. (My awesome cousin was gay, though, and I didn't care because he was hella awesome even though my uncle disowned him.) I can't even imagine trying to be a kid or young adult today where everything you do is all over social media.

I'm a Gen Xer too. Jeeze, I don't know how I survived. My parents worked as social workers in the 1970s and 80s, and we were lived in a foster home for young guys on probation where my toddler brother was taught to walk by the master of arms of the local gang who was on probation! Then we moved to a church that worked with the homeless and people just out of psychiatric care. We were left to roam. Years later my mum asked me if anyone had touched me when I was at the hostel (no, thankfully), and then one of the homeless guys at the church was a convicted pedophile! But he had a wooden leg so Mum said, "we knew you could out run him".

Then we moved to a farm... where my brother accidentally hit me in the mouth with an axe cutting weeds on the farm, and I had to carry on!

 

[Jules100]

What if Phillip is lurking here and discovers people think he’s gay?

 

[Gibson]

Anyone want to break the news to Juniper Jane?

Juniper Jane
10 minutes ago
I just watched the diy show and they announced that Philip and Stephanie are dating. I am thinking they've made a mistake about that. It's none of our business really but thought it was strange they stated that, I mean she could really be his mother and she doesn't seem the type to cross appropriate boundaries with the volunteers and staff especially ones 2 decades younger.

Oh she crossed them alright. Several times ,in different countries and continents.

How far does a boundary stretch?

When she said how supportive she's of him pursuing his acting career, wouldn't it be actually better to set him free, in the name of love, rather than keep him by her side away from the auditions and networking opportunities? TBH I don't have much belief in his talent, but she's stunting his professional growth keeping him in Lalande

Trust me, he is probably enjoying his growth ,professionally and personally. He never had it so good.
He gets to practice dressing up every day and he adopts a persona to fool many alongside his acting coach. Best money he spent on getting his train fare there. It's paid dividends.

 

[Jeeves]

Denise Adams
13 hours agoStephanie said she would be doing more cooking after the last B&B guests left. This group was the last set of B&B guests. It's obvious that those making disparaging comments have found there way here via the hate site. Please move on, hate is not welcome here.

If Denise Adams was a little more astute, she would realise that Dan is one of the few Chateaulanders that emerge with any respect and personal integrity here. She is representative of the intellectually challenged superfans that Fanny relies on to fund her shallow lifestyle.
No wonder she has managed to pull the wool over their eyes for so long. Denise and her ilk deserve our sympathy as it must be a struggle to maintain that level of ignorance in the face of increasing evidence to the contrary.

 

[LaFrancaise123]

Dan's vlog : Wonder if Dan will have time to read (and delete) his comments...Hot ! Hot ! Hot !

It is a Lalandegate !!


Capt. Molyneaux
17 hours agoMme makes $32k a month fr patreon and wont call professional plumbers? I dont get it. ~~ Where's Cheri? Still reading Colette? ~~ And who were the 15 guests in black tie? LaLande is screwball, Dan, so watch yer step.....and raise the ante !



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REPLY
Capt. Molyneaux
17 hours agoPer usual, you are amazing.....or, "Epic" as Mme might say.





Joy E
17 hours ago
Well she did ask if she needed to call a plumber and they said no. Besides, she already had the Preston-Richmon plumbing professionals on the job. What more do you need??



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Paris 07
16 hours ago
You've obviously never lived in France. Calling a plumber is no guarantee that he will arrive at your place for at least a week. I'm not sure whether the term 'emergency' even exists there! And, yes, I have lived in France for a long time, before you ask. I'm not certain I like how the comments are turning against Stéphanie now and I'm also sure that she appreciates and compensates Dan adequately for all that he does.
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Nikisha Z
16 hours ago
@Paris 07 I absolutely agree with you.



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blood honey
15 hours agoThe similarities to Chéri and Léa' story was not lost of me either. Didn't end well as far as I remember.





Teresa C
15 hours ago (edited)
Siding with Joy, Paris & Nikisha. You're wholly unwelcome to use this forum to smear anyone's reputation. Stephanie's not some Simon Legree, nor is Dan some weakling to be taken advantage of. I reject your characterization. The negativity reflects poorly upon those who use it, esp. for no good purpose. Bridget from Cali (using my pal's YT acct)
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blood honey
15 hours ago @Teresa Carle you should read more French literature. No one was characterising Stephanie as amoral villain (ahem). But a novel about 40+ year old woman with a 25 year old lover is shockingly analogous.

Capt. Molyneaux
14 hours ago @Teresa Carle No "characterization" was made...no one was smeared. Take a valium.




Nikisha Z
4 hours ago
@ blood honey um, not to start ugliness, but I do not understand this lover reference. We are not told what goes on behind closed doors and I am deeply grateful for that. But, to assume you know? I find that ridiculous and somewhat disgusting. Now, I will admit, I may have no clue what I am talking about because I AM confused still about the whole lover reference and where that came from in this conversation......
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Nikisha Z
4 hours ago @Capt. Molyneaux you could still be nice even if others are not. Unless you are a grumpy person. Which I can relate to. Even with all my let's just get along preaching. It is difficult.




Nikisha Z
4 hours ago
Ah. It is all a reference to books I have not read. Nevermind. I still stand by my statement that similarities or no, it is ludicrous to assume anything. Just saying. Of course...that could go both ways....hmmm. You know what? Each to his own opinion and I will retract my ludicrous and other word which escapes my mind at the moment. It is honestly not my intent to bicker, but I see I was doing it anyway. I'm sorry!!!
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blood honey
4 hours ago
@Nikisha Zechiel Philip, the 25 year old former volunteer, Hedgehog maniac and cameraman, is Stephanie's boyfriend and paid employee. He's been sharing her "apartment" for about a year. Stephanie is 46 (I think). Colette's 1920 novel Chéri is about a 49 year old retired courtesan Léa and the relationship with her young lover Chéri, aged 25.
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[Delizia]

Steph and "And boyfriend Philip" 's relationship really is like all the renovations going on in Lalande : wonky, mismatched, quickly glued together, bound to fall appart but "oh well will do for now".

"And boyfriend Philip" better resells his expensive mouse painting to be able to buy a decent ring for Sa Majesté.
Will their wedding be financed by the patreons lol? The 5th highest donations bidder will have the chance to be a guest!

 

[MojoDublin]

Ohh ffsake
Flat world - patron

You have felt the need to hide it at great lengths in the past but now the cat is out of the bag, I would just relax and let it go. Has Phillip considered growing his hair long and then donating it to make wigs for children who have cancer?

‍🩹

Cuz it's not some scandal. It's something lovely. Can't wait for Christmas advent. I still hope Mr Micheal can join in this time!
pack yer bags BJJ
Pack yer bags

 

[NotAChatelaine]

My laptop broke. Uhu. Sure! Maybe the same type of laptop my students use, and which regularly breaks down when a deadline for their academic papers looms?

The modern "the dog ate my homework".

 

[JuiceyLoo]

I was really hoping Dan’s vlogs would spend less time at Château Hookup but that doesn’t appear to be the case. Watching him and Amaury fix the water heater was actually super sexy but then watching Amaury fawn over Nati burst my bubble and not in a good way. I already knew they were a thing per The Versailles compilation but I still like to pretend he isn’t so caught up in that nonsense. I’m pretty much done with the whole chateauverse at this point, I’m only hanging in here to see what other shite will hit the fan.

 

[KyBourbon]

Congratulations, again, @ComtesseRose ! Great thread title!!!

 

[PrincessHighness]

So SJ & PJ, and A&N, and S&T, are in relationships. Good for them.
More importantly (for me) has the downstairs Loo been finished?
When I started watching the CD, i thought we might see the actual work being done and the completed project - But no!
Only those projects she works on for Chateau DIY are "completed" and everything else is left hanging. Especially the viewer.

Sorry, for the vent, but I have lost interest in Stefanny and her pretenses of being a "tastemaker".

 

[MojoDublin]

Petheric was there too and was a drunken mess, he was there because they were filming the next day and he
eat anything but salad leaves even though he was as drunk as a skunk drinking cocktails all day with the handsome gay couple there Château hunting, he NEEDED to be trim. Told stories about a french man he was in a relationship with at the time.

Think I know when you were there

So was he there with a pink haired guy ??- and another friend ?
Cos I heard he was pure carnage and left everyone very uncomfortable

If I’m totally honest …
like you pre Covid I’d have gone …
Possibly excused the state of disrepair…
Thinking it must have been stunning when first built
( safe in the knowledge - the endurance test ended when I checked into the George V)
But the gluten free serving I’d have had words about - That’s her intolerance and I’m paying to eat dinner from someone not holding a DR cert stating Coelic…


Not her inability to see beyond her nose

As for SSB … apparently she only sparkles while a camera is rolling
Otherwise … ain’t nothing going on but the grift

 

[MsPitstop]

Ive never commented much before because most of this stuff is known or gleaned from vlogs and I’m here for the fabulous work the tattlers do uncovering bullshit, not so much the nastier posts from occasional posters and I did not want to be in that group. We were told that dinner was at 7.30. A few of us gathered in the salon as there didn’t seem to be anywhere else to gather, nobody was there, no apéro offered, at 8.15 Stephanie appeared and said they were running late, big smile swift retreat. We sat down to dinner around 8.45 and spirits were high, one of our fellow holidaymakers was a skilled raconteur so the lack of attention or alcohol was barely missed. Food wise we were served bruschetta, then lasagne in many different allergy resistant forms with beetroot hummus, go figure. then came a truly terrible gluten free cake cooked by FRK. It was not what I hoped for following my travels through the country. She was very serious and proud of her efforts despite Stephanie teasing her that she wasn’t coeliac, she saw her eat a croisant. My one night only brief glimpse of people - I really liked FRK, friendly, naive and sweet. Isabelle i didn’t have much to do with but my husband LOVED her, they spent a lot of time together so the feeling was mutual apparantly (He’s charming and handsome) Gerry - polar opposite to vlogs and TV, this man is hilarious, really dry wit which I don’t think is displayed on the vlogs. Stephanie - I didnt take to nor did my husband, she watered her one glass of white wine and disappeared. Petheric was there too and was a drunken mess, he was there because they were filming the next day and he
eat anything but salad leaves even though he was as drunk as a skunk drinking cocktails all day with the handsome gay couple there Château hunting, he NEEDED to be trim. Told stories about a french man he was in a relationship with at the time. These were my observations from one night alone, obviously they have informed my views but when I shortly afterwards moved to a more humble home, i stopped watching as I was busy dealing with my own renovation problems and when I saw (at the time) Tomas parading round like he owned the joint in gave up on all château channels.

WOW! As you may have gleaned there have been a couple of Tattlers who have dropped amazing information on the Shitshow (Clara) and Michael's adventures in Spain. So thank you for this personal insight into Lalaland.

I'm most amazed about Scotman. I thought he was a drip, but now I'll look at him differently.

 

[Marty McFly 9]

Found this on the last CD vlog ... a newer comment, but in a comment thread ... Sue Sh makes an excellent point.

Sue Sh
1 hour ago
It’s been pretty obvious since the goat cheese baking vlog, he’s not a talented videographer so the only reason to keep him from returning home to finish his education would be if you were in a relationship, plus the only reason you wouldn’t tell your employee to stop snorting on your vlogs would be if you found it endearing, they do say love is blind or in this case deaf

I wonder how Dan is at 415 in the ranking with less patrons that Michael? I guess I just don't understand the way graphteon comes up with their numbers.

Just a guess, but I wonder if it is because even though Dan & Annalise don't post a lot on their Patron, they do post consistently, and it also might be that they have more comments and interaction. MPK has SUCKED at posting for his patrons this year, and the last time I looked hadn't done one in a month and the last one only had 20ish comments on it. I do not understand how he still has that many patrons when they are getting nothing. Those are the strangest patrons.

 

[Pippip]

I also want to add, when you consider the extreme lengths she has gone to in order to keep the relationship secret, involving other chateau owners, guests, volunteers, etc, in her deceit, you have to ask why? Why did she have to lie and hide her relationship from her audience - does she not trust them? Then why should we trust her? I think this was always about her image and her reputation, which she needs to keep intact to keep getting money. The amount of people who have defended her actions is bizarre - do they like being lied to, they are just enabling her.

 

[MsPitstop]

Stephanie charismatic? I don’t know, I Stayed at the château when I was in thrall of her early vlogs and though I’m a lot younger I felt the need to smooth the conversational path and help her out, she seemed a helpless wreck to me and this was years ago.

Tell us more! Tell us everything! and also, welcome @Dowager Duchess

 

[Marquis de Potpourri]

oh, my, you're younger even than I thought! (you're so precious! not a wrinkle yet!)

I'm honestly relieved for you two. I see so many struggling to figure it out. We had a young woman work with our son for a while and it was like she was struggling to figure out which sexual orientation she was, and was so anxious about it and thinking so hard about it. I think she settle on something like fluid for now, because she can't figure it out ... but yeah, between the gender and sexual orientation, the amount of anxiety is through the roof. I work with 18-25 year olds and about 6 years ago now we noticed the number with anxiety just went through the roof. Though I have had some of your generation also tell me that its like having a mental health issue, particularly anxiety, has become trending, and everyone has it or thinks they do.

My fiancee is older than me by a month, in essence, I'm engaged to a cougar!
This is my experience (so, anyone, please don't shoot me ). I went to an all-boys school that offers courses like healthy masculinity and 21st-century manhood, but the school occasionally invited lecturers on gender studies, who introduced the idea of gender as a spectrum. Those lectures caused a lot of confusion and subsequently, anxiety-depression among students. A few students said trying to figure out where they were on the gender spectrum gave them sleepless nights. One student told his mom about his confusion, apparently, the mother told him, "Go to your room, stand in front of the mirror, pull your boxers down. Whatever you have, that's what you are, no matter what your mind tells you."

Anyhoo...back to Lalande.

 

[Beau Monde]

Can you imagine the knockdown dragout fights Squirrelnutkins and Nicki Fairslax would have over which china pattern to set for brunch? It would be a bloodbath.

 

[Clara Burnett]

I do love bibi Bon Bon.

Ain't she a riot? I take a deep bow, but it will be nothing but kamikaze...she will be blocked, erased, cancelled and ignored sooner rather than later. But I bet she's already among us...

 

[MsPitstop]

I once sat next to a family member of Königsegg. He was on his way to the village Königsegg where all the owners (mostly some Emirs ) of Königsegg cars meet. They all (though only like 15 people or so) bring their cars with them stay a day and fly home again. He himself had no car. We came to talk about cars because I know a southamerican car engineer who works for Molitor racing systems and test drives all those racing cars. He is the nicest guy and loves my German food.
This guy I met through a friend of mine from Egypt who works for the startup Lillium Munich Air travel. (look it up, very interesting) I met my Egyptian friend... and now wait for it... because... he came as a workaway to my place...

On a business class flight (for work) out of LA on Swiss Air, I sat next to The Bachelor Switzerland. He was coked out of his skull! He was very cute and funny and the flight attendants spent most of their time leaning over his seat - boobs nearly in his face, asking if he needed anything. When was one offering him yet another beer, I asked her if I could please have a top-up of wine. She just glared at me and walked away. So I asked Bachelor to ask her for a white wine ... for me!