The Chateau Diaries #44 Once again the flogs are full of of Tits, Tat and Tedious Tours.

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Here we go - time to reintroduce our Caption competition!
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Not a chance! Maybe a guillotine to chop off their heads...I am of course referring to chickens and not the inhabitants ;)

I watched the latest Vlog and thought it was a bit of a miss mash of goings on over a couple of weeks.
Ian definitely did not look happy.
That toilet!! I could have plumbed it quicker with covid restrictions and why have they put a chandelier in when plastering needs doing?
Selmar's drumming, sounding his own death knell there. Potty was obvs taking photos so it may have been set up like that. Selmar needs to take lessons off Dan. Less is more, editing is your friend.
Steph in that Vlog! She should have played nicely. They couldn't have been more obvious if they tried.
Philip- give up man. You can't help, you can't run.The Rooster outwits you, the women carry plasterboard and no-one can hear a thing with you sounding like you are jerking off behind the camera. (Apologies for crudeness) he really does make concentrating on what is being said hard. Almost as bad as Selmar's vlogs.
Mrs G, who adores CD's, has also lost interest and mutters curses under her breath along the lines of 'you were right,' and' I have to fast forward when he starts huh huh huh !'( I edited the swears)
Wait wait

Ian BUTCH slapping
lil- snorty - financial nostril 👃

Snorty : How much will it cost …. To insulate

Ian … more than it costs and Less than it should be …..

Week 2 of BUTCH slap 👋
on Philipa of land nostril

That’s a twofer ….. 😈

Ouch 🤕
 
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I really enjoy them, and I prefer short vlogs. Oh my life, the shithole kitchen and entrance to it! So scruffy and messy, and the floor under the table..! ewwww it was disgusting - I though the point of stone floors was you can scrub them clean? does anyone clean there? dear god!
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I saw it too. Disgusting.
 
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The whole Star Wars bar bubble boy thing just leaps out at you.
This is what is in season in France in July. No where does it say roasted root vegetables.


  • Beets/Betteraves
  • Corn/Maïs
  • Cucumbers/Concombres
  • Eggplant/Aubergine
  • Fresh herbs/Herbes fraîches
  • Garlic/Ail
  • Green beans/Haricots verts
  • Okra/Gombo
  • Onions/Oignons
  • Potatoes/Pommes de terre
  • Summer squash/Potimarron
  • Summer lettuce (Romaine, Mâche, Butterhead, Oak Left green/red)/Laitue d’été (Romaine, Masque, Butterhead, Chêne Gauche vert/rouge)
  • Blackberries/Mûres
  • Blueberries/Myrtilles
  • Figs/Figues
  • Grapes/Raisins
  • Limes/Citrons verts
  • Mangos/Mangos
  • Melons/Melons
  • Nectarines/Nectarines
  • Peaches/Pêches
  • Plums/Prunes
  • Raspberries/Framboises
  • Tomatoes/Tomates
It seems almost every dinner for b&b guests is roasted chicken and roasted potatoes ( cheap ingredients and no imagination) but edible.
 
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It seems that this is their official website for booking.

Admire our Chatelaine posing for the booking page (not sure I would like to book in a place with such a landlady TBH)

How cold is that ShitO? Every suite comes with its own hot water bottle? And you need to be drunk to withstand dinner?
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Seriously what the hell do Dan and Kristy do all day? If the grass is growing at that rate without being watered then the beds in the garden should be flourishing as well. Am sure the garden soil has been stripped of any nutrients unless I missed them tilling and bringing new healthy soil in.
At the moment it seems Dan is busy filming for his channel. Every youtuber moans about how much longer a project takes when you have to film it. I wonder if she will regret letting Dan do all of this filming (for his pocketbook) during working hours. Curious what percentage he is actually gardening vs. filming.
 
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Well thank you..Still figuring out how this site works..with threads and things..so let me know in time.. ;) i dont have so much with the threads...whats in them is more interesting..


I wonder what Fan Flash thinks of this friendship...
SJ has her Snorts up her skirt 24 hours a day. She is happy.. But I think it is ridiculous how they all talk about the endless work that Nutti does. We never see her working.
 
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Here we go - time to reintroduce our Caption competition!
Hi! I'm Stephanie and I don't have to live life the way everyone else is living it, just because the Tattlers told me so!
 
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At the moment it seems Dan is busy filming for his channel. Every youtuber moans about how much longer a project takes when you have to film it. I wonder if she will regret letting Dan do all of this filming (for his pocketbook) during working hours. Curious what percentage he is actually gardening vs. filming.
I think there is some kind of agreement made...i dont think Fan Flash pays Dan all his hours..while he is vlogging for his own channel...i dont think she is that generous...she uses his droneshots,,,he does some filming..i think they made some kind of agreement..
 
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Who drinks sherry? How often are the kettles and other drinks items cleaned and replaced? There are no televisions in room. Is wifi free? As someone asked earlier, can I help myself to an apertif or a cup of coffee from the kitchen? I can't believe the fans won't be a bit disappointed with their Friday night to Sunday morning experience. Interesting checkin is not until 4:00pm.
 
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Potty is trying to flog his book on Amsterdam “at its most beautiful” ‘From Dusk till Dawn’ at the reduced price of 40 euros! 😧
 
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I thought she looked very sad. I would be, too, if I had sold my privacy, my peace of mind and my soul for fame and patreon money.😰
Yes, but you are assuming she has a "soul" I'm pretty sure she doesn't. My guess her sadness is because they are out of gin or whatever her alcohol of choice is.

That Steve and Sarah couple…so NOT your “typical” Canadians…in any way…I’ve wondered just where they’re from, with that weird, nasal accent, ffs. Very annoying…embarrassing…Signed…a proud Canadian (long May we rock!)
Agreed! My guess is they are just white trash backwoods hicks claiming to be something they are not and have tried to come up with something they think will pass as respectable. In my Humble Opinion ;) they have FAILED! I know many many Canadians from Vancouver Island to Newfoundland and everywhere in between and these two do not fit into what I would call "typical Canadians" either. There is NOTHING about them or their story that jives. Am I correct Sarah???? I know you are reading this.
 
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