The Chateau Diaries #286 Fanny has bigger bulges in her face than PhiPhi has in his trousers

[skybluepink098]

She also appeared to sign heavily resting on top of the print so would surely imprint and damage it!
It's all done with haste and little thought.

I was going to comment on that too! She is oblivious.

 

[JackSpratt]

Why on earth did they pick hedges that go brown and die in winter? What the hell are those things anyway? Are they supposed to drop all their leaves in winter? Dan’s plants went in green and stayed green.
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She’s really ruining his professional reputation with how she depicts him. He’s comes off as slow as hell and unable to plan jobs so that they get finished. If it’s all down to her pulling him this way and that she sure doesn’t show it. I’d be pissed if I were him being cast in that light due to her editing and holding back the money to finish things.
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We haven’t spoken of it, but someone had to go down to the people that fell. It would have been horrible to look upon and then have to make decisions on how best to help. I saw a person have a grand mal seizure in public once and it was traumatic to say the least. All I knew to do was call for help and a nurse knew what to do for the man. I was scared to touch him because I didn’t know what to do.

I use to work at Motorway Control and have seen more than my fair share of grisly sights. It never stops being upsetting no matter how many accidents you see, it's not something everyone can handle, you did the right thing.

That day would have been awful for those that were there.

 

[Lochness Monster]

@ ohdontknow the hedge in the grotto garden are hornbeam and they hold there leaves for a long while during winter. Fanny being cheap again but did not prune them hard. n English garden would be best with yew hedges which grow quite quickly despite what many say.

FRk is apparently updating her Patreon site!
But in the meantime her bio has gone from warning yachties to look out, as she seems to have graduated and is now a yachtie.
What an amazing cookery school.

The bowls of hyacinths before FRK left !

Amoury is a Mummys boy, short and lacks self esteem.
His workshop is half immaculate and half a complete mess. He is unemployable in the real world so can pretend work at the pretend chateau with the pretend princess.

 

[FecilitéJ]

Well-observed.
Here's a well-argued case about the same phenom but in the skull of a U.S. presidential candidate.
The author is a killer lawyer, former Republican, and the former husband of said candidate's Little Edie, captive tapdancer Kellyanne Conway.

Unfit for Office

Donald Trump’s narcissism makes it impossible for him to carry out the duties of the presidency in the way the Constitution requires.

www.theatlantic.com

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Such a good point. One guy, much less money, has done more resto than she has in 20 years.
It gives a good idea of the size of the grift, to compare it to what somebody else has achieved with much less money, alone, in 1/20th of the time.

Really enjoy Conway's perspective and he's looking so much better since he lost that dead weight of a wife.

As for renovations, the guys at La lacelle have done an "amazin" amount of work with much less too. It would be fun (for someone who is not me) to figure out income v expenditure for some of the chateauverse YouTubers. I bet it would make interesting reading.

 

[Fennelbug]

The Chateau Diaries #157 You'll never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy, caution is advised!

The latest CDIY made it crystal clear Jarvis does no DIY when the cameras are not around, and I think the previous episodes all point to the same conclusion. She doesn't do anything. The episodes in series two show her sweeping the straw out of Gerald's apartment, most unconvincingly treating...

tattle.life

View attachment 2729896

Beaver Shot
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A STAUNCH WOMAN

 

[noisette]

This from Lady Avonlea…
Stephanie Jarvis either has a new found interest in rebar & cement or she's in heat!

 

[Nettle flower]

Interesting that Annalise liked his post…

Who is he?

 

[Le Baiseur]

Who is he?

I think he's the Australian guy that visited and helped dig and hide Davy's fugly yellow pipes around the new trees in the courtyard?

 

[Lochness Monster]

Who is he?

Didnt he build the pergola on the terrace at the dump !? Also he is / was the sheep shearer .

 

[Imperious Me]

Word has it, Staphanie will be tottering across the lawn the chapel in her negligee with two shot glasses and a bottle of Whiskey... What a smoldering look she captured there!

 

[Fennelbug]

Didnt he build the pergola on the terrace at the dump !? Also he is / was the sheep shearer .

He also mocked Snorts because he was too weak to lift a 40lb piece of bench in the Jardin Anglais. Good Times!
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Word has it, Staphanie will be tottering across the lawn the chapel in her negligee with two shot glasses and a bottle of Whiskey... What a smoldering look she captured there!View attachment 2730119

He actually looks suspicious…..

 

[Imperious Me]

He also mocked Snorts because he was too weak to lift a 40lb piece of bench in the Jardin Anglais. Good Times!
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He actually looks suspicious…..

..and he went to Brico shopping for chicken houses with Staphanie... and he bought & cooked dinner that night, you'd think they'd never seen steak the way they all carried on..

 

[EvaQ8..the bldg]

The Bauer in Venice remains closed for renovations until 2024, so where will poor, destitute Fanny plunk her fanny during her much needed holiday to "La Dominante," "Serenissima," "Queen of the Adriatic," "City of Water," "City of Masks," "City of Bridges," "The Floating City," and "City of Canals."????

My vote goes to the 5* Gritti Palace with a balcony suite overlooking the Grand Canal. It's a Marriott hotel and lying Fanny will no doubt claim she get's an upgrade due to the 2 Puffs & a Pug and based on her recent stay at the Imperial Hotel in Vienna (another Marriott hotel).

@Lady Avonlea you guessed right… suite overlooking the grand canal. They are so predictable… it is not even funny!

 

[graciemckitten]

I thought it was big hands...

What does that imply about giant man hands Stephanie?

 

[OhIDontKnow...]

I just finished the first two episodes of the Swans and I had to jump in here because I have a new nickname for Snorts aka PhiPhi. Wait for it…………..

Truman Compote

Given that he is a vicious queen purse carrier for Fanny, and his love of porcelain………..

 

[M&MsMom]

..and he went to Brico shopping for chicken houses with Staphanie... and he bought & cooked dinner that night, you'd think they'd never seen steak the way they all carried on.. View attachment 2730139

Hello, Grahnt!

 

[Lady Avonlea]

Davy also said she needed to install a cistern in the back yard, from the French drains Matt the digger installed, to water the then-proposed Jardin Anglaise. Still holding my breath.

Why was Fanny shouting out adulations to Davy when she saw some early ground cover? Davy seems to be distancing himself from the shitoo and has no plans to see Fanny until the CFS in May. Has Davy seen the light? Did Fanny blame Davy for installation problems with the Indian gazebo? Is Davy becoming embarrassed to have his name associated with Fanny's straggly, bedraggled bushes?

 

[T Rex]

TRex was right. Stephanie eats like a trash panda. The holiday from hygiene gruesome twosome cooking and made up culinary concoctions are disgusting. Leaving roasted turnips/ radishes sitting in the air fryer all night, using sprouted potatoes without removing the eyes, etc. They are so gross yet think they are sooooooo posh.

They are also lazy as tit, “ racing” off to Venice, leaving greasy Christmas decorations and Christmas trees up at the Dump until Marie gets back from cooking school in a couple of weeks or so. Taking down decorations is beneath the, and for the “ help.”

Fanny also way tacky greeting the architect with her wet hair wrapped up in twists/ curlers. Guess the architect was lucky she put on clothes, n stead of greeting him in her see through negligee or summoning him to her bedroom as she lay semi naked on her bed.

That green table will always be a piece of tit. Nutty was unimpressed.

Their "culinary concoctions" are abysmal, and need a side of Pepto Bismol! (I'm not sure if abysmal rhymes with Pepto Bismol, but close enough!) The tinned tomatoes: a normal person, having discovered an opened tin of any food item in the refrigerator without knowing WHEN it was opened wouldn't do a sniff test and deem it okay- it would have gone straight into the bin. Who stores opened tins of food in their refrigerator!?! Someone who is too lazy to put it into a Tupperware and put the date on the container in dry-erase marker. Yuck! The inside of their refrigerator must be something to behold in sights, fuzzy textures and smells- no wonder Amaury and Herr Nutti now bring their own meals with them. I would be willing to wager that it was opened during Christmas. I do wonder if the roasted radishes are still sitting, forgotten, in the air fryer. On a positive note, Fanny did wish to shed a few stones before her grand entrance to Venice- it will be "Shart Week" aboard her flight.

I'm guessing the Christmas decorations will get taken down in a mad rush right before A Very Fanny Easter. Well, if anything, Fanny can capitalize upon the decorations still being up to create even earlier content for her 2024 Advent vlogs!

 

[LittleMore Cottage]

..and he went to Brico shopping for chicken houses with Staphanie... and he bought & cooked dinner that night, you'd think they'd never seen steak the way they all carried on.. View attachment 2730139

Look there is no bag head Nic
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I just finished the first two episodes of the Swans and I had to jump in here because I have a new nickname for Snorts aka PhiPhi. Wait for it…………..

Truman Compote

Given that he is a vicious queen purse carrier for Fanny, and his love of porcelain………..

Omg watching as I read this ... Great nickname

 

[T Rex]

Look there is no bag head Nic

He looks much better with the bag over his head. Fanny should make Snorts wear one as well. What an unattractive lot the men of the Shittoo are!