One reason the Baby Girl From Heck Bedroom™ (BGFHB) is so awful is that Pavlina is clever, artistic, cultured, hard-working, and has good taste. Been inspecting her Instagram. There is nothing in the BGFHB which meets any of her criteria -- pink woodwork, somehow both infantile and tacky -- which would include an appreciation of a simple servant’s bedroom in a chateau, combined with the Subtly Sapphic East Village Scissor Sisters vibe which is the rule of the game set by
@Le Baiseur and the scope of the work here today.
Taking as my inspo the painting by the neo-realist Ingres of the Comtesse Hausonville, a seductress, in a painting beloved by the East Village hipsters of the 40s and 50s, de Kooning and Gorky, I’ve settled on a grey and yellow color scheme. All grey and not too much damn yellow, per the frightening roll call of twee tricked out grey and yellow bedrooms here, wow.
https://www.digsdigs.com/gre-yellow-bedrooms/
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en.wikipedia.org
The East Village, of course, being the font, source and home town of the Scissor Sisters band. See? We had a kiki.
First to go is the toile headboard, to be replaced with a double bed. The question is, a low slung platform double, or a curvy Euro headboard double?
I confess I also play with the idea of no headboard, and instead a wall-sized mural repro of the inspo painting, Comtesse Haussonville, as per Philippe Starck’s 1989 masterpiece hotel room at the Paramount Hotel in Manhattan.
www.nytimes.com
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No room in the hotel was larger than 12 by 14 feet; Starck conceived this genius idea for a small and minimal space. I love the white pillows and the white table with orchids to match at the foot of the bed.
https://djhuppatz.blogspot.com/2009/06/philippe-starckian-schrager-designer.html
If a larger than life size Comtesse were the head board, her dress would fill the room with luxurious luster without actually taking up the space such drapery requires. And all the ideas for texture, art and tschotskes below would be ditched for Starck minimalism.
In the cases of the low platform or curvy headboard double, the bedding becomes the major feature of the room. Mine would be grey and white, and richly textured with modern textiles, as here. I’d like to see a reversible raw silk/soft cashmere throw here, in grey. (Noted, back in the day, the sheets you look best on are different from the ones you like the best.)
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We are in a small servant’s room, shiny silk and toile seem way out of order visually and spatially. Glints of very subtle shine or luxe in a confined space, wormholes you can fall through, are of the essence.
I’m noting above the white porcelain sculpture to the right, good choice. For Pavlina’s room, something subtly Sapphic in white…..perhaps three of this five-inch plastic 3 D print of d’Epinay’s 19th c neo-realist sculpture of Sappho
https://www.ebay.com/itm/165034258839
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I think Pavlina needs a lockable business-like desk, wifi and cellphone set up. I’d go for minimalist.
A nature table, which could be some kind of open shelving. Ditto.
A desk chair and a guest chair. Ditto.
A book shelf. Ditto.
A yoga or Pilates space.
Surfaces for two or three bouquets. Ditto.
This sounds like $300 worth of IKEA -- or Amaury building simple shelving -- to me.
I’m thinking IKEA LACK shelves if they still make them.
I think she does not require a huge ugly five-and-a-half foot six drawer bureau and if she does it should be in the hall.
My art on the luminous pale grey wall, perhaps linen-textured paper, would be a small Comtesse Haussonville, a good reproduction in a simple frame, perhaps stainless steel. Because de Kooning doted on her, and based his sense of drawing women on Ingres, perhaps a few of the smaller and less scary drawings of women he worked on in the late 40s and early 50s, cut from this $25 used book and framed.
https://www.abebooks.com/9780691096186/Willem-Kooning-Tracing-Figure-Cornelia-069109618X/plp
Those Ingres-fuelled East Village years of drawings led to his most famous painting, Woman I.
https://www.frieze.com/article/willem-de-kooning
Even his drawings are a lot for a small room.
And his women are pure sex, off the wall.
Pavlina would have to have a smooth jazz playlist of de Kooning’s favored EV hipster tunes to go with. And a decanter of Jack Daniels, bien sur. For the nature table.
https://www.sfmoma.org/artist/Willem_de_Kooning/
A small postcard sized repro of one of Van Gogh’s sunflowers — or all five of his sunflower paintings, to group on some corner of a foreign field that is for ever Ukraine. This, and the bouquets, would be all the yellow I’d add to the palest gray and white scheme.
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Maybe white Greek key trim on the hem of grey floor length wafty organdie curtains. (Please note, Fanny, washable and ironable.)
Lace I can use to decorate my house with, Greek inspired lace for my handbag, Greek inspired lace for my headband, Greek inspired lace for my home, Greek pattern on lace.
www.mjtrim.com
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https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sunflowers_(Van_Gogh_series)
Finally, I’d work out a deal with the wonderful Ukrainian textile artist Anastasiia Podervianska to sell me an image of any one of her works of art Pavlina likes best for this bedroom. Perhaps this one, the skull on the serviette. It too could go on the nature table, with the bourbon and the nettle soup recipe.
