The Chateau Diaries #236 Tattlers have seen a crotch quiz and tulip-gate, but NO renovations or accounts!

[Lady Avonlea]

Random Survey - Is Fanny:

- hung over
- sleepy after waking up at her usual time (mid-afternoon)
- sleepy after waking up early (noon)
- suffering from hay-fever after her drunk nap in the bluebell wood
- looking more like Gerry every day

 

[graciemckitten]

Is this the first project that Phillip has done from start to finish?
It seems that two lazy people realized that dragging around the Chateau won't bring them views or Patreons, so they got down to business.
Phillip sounds and looks like he's in shock. Well, it will be like that when you work hard and get tired.

Remember several videos ago at the puffs and pugs party, Snorts claimed the only exercise he gets is from opening bottles of wine/champagne. He is pissed when he has to do manual labor. He only wants to shop, decorate, film, open gifts, read about china, design, and architecture, roam around the inside of the Dump, and chase hedgehogs.The only reason he hung wallpaper was he was doing the task with Fanny and it was being filmed.

Phi Phi declaring that he was never going to paint a ceiling again will make F4F force him to paint more ceilings. He thinks he is the equivalent to Baghead and 10% owner Potts ( who ran away when the ceiling collapsed to find expensive wine for him, Fanny, and Baghead to drink while the downstairs staff Amaury and Dan fixed the ceiling.) Entitled Phi phi thinks he co owns the Dump and is a co-Shittelaine of the Dump.He is now openly criticizing Isabelle’s older lighting, etc. while he picks up loads of junky lighting to install at the Dump. He gets mad when F4F does not accept his recommendations about the Dump. If Fanny make him do manual labor daily and help Amaury haul trash, clean up messes, and actually do work, clean out the chicken coops, he could get so pissed off, he may want to leave the Dump. She needs to leave him behind at the Dump and not take him on her next couple of vacations,

Think of how Amaury was disrespected when his pristine workshop was turned into yet another dirty junkyard for Dump trash, discarded equipment, and crap, Then, to add insult to injury, Amaury has to clean out all the crap himself, with no help, so he can clean and move his own equipment, all while being filmed to provide content for Cuz Fanny to make huge sums of money for herself. Fanny had no shame or embarrassment over the nasty room. She just doesn’t care. It is very telling that she is treating her beloved Cuz, her family, who has over worked himself for months to help his ungrateful, greedy Cuz Fanny and her 26 year old lazy concubine.

Have you notice Fanny has never shown where she stores the tons of crap she receives from rage Grift Grab Unwrapped channel? 95% of what she receives is never seen again. Is it all thrown away in a skip every few months? We know she uses crap from the grift grab to stock her for profit B and B suites. We have seen her greedily grab the chocolates, food, and alcohol items. I believe the majority of the handcrafted items are thrown away. What else do you from the grift grab do you think is usually binned by F4F?

 

[KyBourbon]

If I were Our Lady Dame Fanny Four Flues, Mother of Perpetual Chaos, I’d be terrified to be rolling in the bluebells with Phyllis the Sexual Deviant for fear of him finally smothering or suffocating me to at last get his hands on the title of Lady of LieLande. SJ is very keen to create these little Richard Curtis Notting Hill vignettes, but SJ seems incapable of reciprocating Phyllis’s “I love you”…. because even SJ knows it’s only a performance. I wonder if when she calls cut on that scene she says “Phyllis dearest, that was a bit much - try not to ham it up. Look more natural for the grannies. Now let’s go indoors and try on my new dresses.”

Anyway, I just don’t believe they’re a couple. He slept in that bed in the Bin (intentional spelling mistake) Maman’s room for the simple reasons that they live separately. Like he also sleeps in his “study” - it’s his bloody bedroom, we all know it. Why would he retain a bed when he could easily fill the space with more detritus from Emmaus? Not buying it. SJ lied to us for over a year about her relationship status with Phyllis - pretending they didn’t share beds or rooms, saying that he had another room down the corridor and yet passing up the opportunity of showing it… I think they had a relationship at one point, but now it’s all performance. Phyllis is a raging homosexual - it’s plain for us all to see. Now she’s let him in - figuratively speaking too - and he’s learned how the sausage is made she can’t well let him go with all her secrets. So she retains her gay boy like a fag gag does. All very sad keeping up appearances like they do.

PhiPhi’s resume is “boy band” singer and actor. For some strange reason, I think Fanny has to have a gay companion nearby. Insecurity, Anxiety? And as a she result needs constant affirmation? I don’t know. But, originally her close companion on the vlogs was Michael Petherick. They pretended to have a “non relationship” for about a year or so. Convinced many of her subscribers they were a couple. Michael was even going to have his own room at the farmhouse…until he decided he didn’t want to play along anymore. Then, here comes PhiPhi. I honestly think PhiPhi, the actor, is there as Michael Petherick’s replacement. I think Fanny was content to keep their “relationship” mysterious (like she did with Michael), but PhiPhi decided he really wanted to embrace the part in public. He’s acting. I also think Fanny might have recently confided to Michael that her relationship with PhiPhi is fake…just an act…which may be why Michael has taken some shots at Chateau Diaries and also follows/comments on the parody channels “Behind the Chateau Doors,” “Chateau WrapUp,” etc. I don’t think Michael liked the fakery between himself and Fanny. And he doesn’t like the fakery between Fanny and PhiPhi (plus, he’s probably as annoyed with PhiPhi as the rest of us are). Maybe we’d be more open to the fake relationship if PhiPhi was more likable. But, just as everything else he does at the farmhouse, he’s failing at this acting role. That’s what Fanny gets for hiring cheap actors!

 

[Just Grift Wood]

Fanny tonight comparing her work effort of passing Snorts wallpaper with Amaury's Herculean efforts is just insulting. She even watched him hoover, she literally does nothing and has to criticise everyones efforts. Snorts hung the curtains, instead of just quietly changing it, the ungrateful lazy rosacea ridden hag has to point it out. Snorts making out he had a meeting ha ha do you think he is getting a junior bank account?


Tonight she made sure we all spotted that she wasn't calling the leaf a marigold. The meal was so meagre what an insult. The guests looked awkward. I have seen bigger gold fish than that piece of cod.


We are led to believe they are soooooooo busy but can go to the woods for a kip and the fact he has never seen the woods in full bloom speaks volumes about the pair of them. Tonight obviously vile garish garage flowers got mixed with the flowers from the woods as tattlers questioned the selection.

Tattlers mentioned the piano being out of tune ta dah the piano tuner has been. I would have thought a piano tuner would be harder to find in rural France than builders. The scenes of her running around in her sweaty clammy man made fibre pjs and 100 stars robs were shot at different times. Her skin kept changing in each shot. I find her absolutely repugnant these days, so unwholesome, unclean, and amoral.

WHERE ARE THE ACCOUNTS, WHAT ABOUT THE STRUCTURAL ISSUES YOU GRIFTING OLD SOAK
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Fanny's theme tune

 

[Just Grift Wood]

Cathy B
1 hour ago
Amoury - That looks like a lonely job clearing things to the skip - Where were all the little helpers - Shopping?




2




Reply

 

[Kalessi]

Nasty Natti must be employing a new PR company in an effort to clean up her image. There is a charming little video of her on IG showering love and affection (and cat treats) on Ruby all the while cuddling Molly. What me a domineering bully? No way just look at how kind I am to all creatures great and small.

Way back when I was first watching cd, it was quite enjoyable. Repunzal was upstairs in her bedroom receiving food and things from mummy via a rope and a basket because of Covid. Nothing much was happening at the castle. There was no patronage. There were no guests, visitors were mostly limited to her family and the other owners. Eventually it was time to get back on track with the b&b and in comes Natti. She seemed to get things done. She got busy answering all the emails that repunzal was too busy napping to get to and set about getting the place ready for guests. I think Fanny played a part in her being a bully so that she didn’t have to do the dirty work herself. I’m not saying that she isn’t one but her job was to whip that place into shape. I always have thought it was strange when she sits in on the gift grab. That seems to against my image of her as a manager. Now, all the sexual allegations go way over my head with the whole lot of them. I would gladly remain celibate in that hell hole to be honest. Poor old Selmar stumbled into a hornets nest there. Everyone seems to change after a stint at the shitoo, just think about it. Remember when cuz first showed up on the scene? Now, look at the guy cleaning up trash.

 

[KiKiGee]

 

[M&MsMom]

Is Stephanie slowly turning into a Klingon (Star Trek reference)? What's with those large veins on her forehead?

For reference, here are some Klingons:

 

[Toys in the attic]

The bread oven is broken. No idea how? Potts has to bake his bread in the chatelaines oven now!

Wasn't the smoke from the bread oven going somewhere it shouldn't? Poor old Fanny does have trouble with her flues

 

[graciemckitten]

I don't get it- a big deal is made about making special dishes for Snorts (the non-paying leech "guest") and those with real dietary restrictions, but why could Maria not take a few extra minutes to ask the parents (paying guests) what the children liked and made something they would prefer (I get it- some parents prefer their children to eat the same thing adults are, but they are on holiday- why not indulge them a bit?) While the children were exceptionally polite and well-behaved, they looked absolutely miserable. It would have taken 5 minutes to make a few grilled cheese sandwiches to put on a side plate with some crisps, and they probably would have preferred an ice cream sundae or biscuits to the "potato turd".

The children will never forget that dinner, especially the potato “turd.” LieLande is not kid friendly. All the children who visit there end of looking like Kid No. 1 after being denied a tulip.

It appears that Maria does not consult guests as to their dinner preferences other than allergies, and just decides what she would like to make and serve to guests, usually using ingredients from the most expensive vegetable garden in France in some offbeat way, that may not necessarily make guests feel satisfied. Does Stephanie give her a small budget for these dinners? The guest seem to get such meager portions at the dinners.

I don’t understand why Maria doesn’t include in each dinner a couple of basic dishes, breads, cheeses, etc.that a guest can fill up on if they don5 like courgettes, etc.

I don’t see how snorts, who likes his two entrées and two desserts, is ever full after one of the dinners at the dump. I have a feeling he and Stephanie go upstairs after a dinner, and indulge in additional food and wine from her cadeaux food stash and and a separate pile of food items that they have stashed away in her refrigerator.
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Why didn’t Stephanfraudie include video footage of the guests admiring the large yellow tulip that was denied to Kid No. 1?

 

[JackSpratt]

Thank you @ComtesseRose for the new thread.

Now, it coud be different where they are but I doubt it. Emmaus, on a Saturday (as guessing thats the day the guests went with Snorts) opens in the morning from 10am to midday and the afternoon from 2pm to 6pm. They can't ever get their arses into gear can they, so were the guests having 'breakfast' at lunchtime? Also how unprofessional was Snorts standing in the dining room stuffing a croissant in his gob!

More sodding coloured 1980s stemware, it's just buying for the sake of it even Fanny didn't sound convinced but it seems whatever he says goes.

I should feel sorry for Aumary but I don't. He should have told them if they want him to be able to do his carpentry, then they should clear their own shit out of the stables. Snorts could have done it instead of going out buying more tat.

 

[TorontoGWM]

Straight men do not use the word “bodice”.

 

[KyBourbon]

Don’t you like it when people have a natural and relaxed smile?

In the US we call that “resting bitch face!”

 

[On Repeat]

Michael's flog today was really good. Family orientated, doggos, beautiful forest walks, appropriate music, an overstuffed pretty garden and the closing view of afternoon sunshine through the new cottage garden was lovely. Well done Michael- and I would like to suggest carrying on the garden to the other side of the path as you thin out this new garden. Maybe flog getting that area ready because the forest of the chateau is very beautiful and your dad is click bait!
Stephanie Jarvis can never put together a calming, simple vlog of beauty as this one.

 

[BigGreenMeany]

So odd that they would carry glasses of wine instead of bringing a bottle and packing a little picnic basket I’m sure they’ve been send dozens of cute picnic paraphernalia what a pair of twats…and pizza again

They are all at Emaus or sold on ebay...

Isn't it wwid with Smegma-boy - with all her weird allergies yet he has no hay fever like about 89% of the rest of us. That to me is a sign about how he can pick and choose his allergies.
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WARNING: PhiPhi photodump

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Fanny looks rough in the last picture. I guess Phiphi really gave it to her....
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I just started watching the vlog where Nutty boils the egg. And says" i have to test it, you never know with the water." I dunno what they taught her in Argentina but water qualities have fuck all to do with boiling a fucking egg. Water has a boiling point - egg needs a fix time in boiling water to be hard cooked. Am i missing something or is this an episode of fucking Twilight Zone????

 

[HalcyonOrganic]

Oh isn’t it cute, even Dragonzord managed to make it into the top comments…

 

[Marquis de Potpourri]

Cathy B
6 minutes ago
In the beginning, chateau unwrapped used to have a crowd of people, all the volunteers, friends, Mummy, Marie, David, Hanni, a cast of thousands with a real party atmosphere. What's happened, where has everybody gone?


Look like PhiPhi got his fresh supply of shoe polish for his head pubes from Amazon this week!

 

[Dragomiroff]

PhiPhi’s resume is “boy band” singer and actor. For some strange reason, I think Fanny has to have a gay companion nearby. Insecurity, Anxiety? And as a she result needs constant affirmation? I don’t know. But, originally her close companion on the vlogs was Michael Petherick. They pretended to have a “non relationship” for about a year or so. Convinced many of her subscribers they were a couple. Michael was even going to have his own room at the farmhouse…until he decided he didn’t want to play along anymore. Then, here comes PhiPhi. I honestly think PhiPhi, the actor, is there as Michael Petherick’s replacement. I think Fanny was content to keep their “relationship” mysterious (like she did with Michael), but PhiPhi decided he really wanted to embrace the part in public. He’s acting. I also think Fanny might have recently confided to Michael that her relationship with PhiPhi is fake…just an act…which may be why Michael has taken some shots at Chateau Diaries and also follows/comments on the parody channels “Behind the Chateau Doors,” “Chateau WrapUp,” etc. I don’t think Michael liked the fakery between himself and Fanny. And he doesn’t like the fakery between Fanny and PhiPhi (plus, he’s probably as annoyed with PhiPhi as the rest of us are). Maybe we’d be more open to the fake relationship if PhiPhi was more likable. But, just as everything else he does at the farmhouse, he’s failing at this acting role. That’s what Fanny gets for hiring cheap actors!

You are so right - she does have precedence of this kind of behaviour. Contrary to what I said last week - I actually think Petherick still may have a fondness towards Our Lady Dame Fanny Four Flues, Mother of Perpetual Chaos because we know MP is fine with taking potshots at Brenda Gibbons and similar characters. He hasn’t done that towards SJ - as far as I’m aware. I think his gripe is actually directed towards Phyllis. The animosity between the two at the HMN and in Paris was so telling. Something has happened between them, which has caused great vexation. The dynamic between Michael and Stephanie was much more joyful and energetic, now with just Phyllis in the picture everything is lethargic, just like his hair condition. I’ll say it again - Phyllis is not porking Stephanie - I’ll need an OF tape to prove otherwise. It’s just physically impossible - he’s an outright backdoor bandit. We all know, as does Stephanie. That toile bed is home to only one Queen,…. and it’s Stephanie. I wish Phyllis would make like his hairline and recede.

 

[Lady Avonlea]

I swear they ALL want to put Snorts forward for the janitor role. They're just being polite.

Snorts would be afraid of breaking a nail.

 

[ScooterMaGoo]

I have to say that I like Maria. I think she does a good job with what she has to work with - I think her budget for food is close to nothing, so portions are quite small, and she needs to be very creative with how she uses food. I also like her piano playing quite a bit, but making everyone sit down for a concert is a bit much. They should have some sort of cocktail hour in the afternoon so she can play while they drink and mingle. If she leaves, they're screwed. We know that Steph and Phi Phi can't begin to do the work she does.