The Chateau Diaries #231 Liar land the land of Liars

[C'est moi]

They'll have FRK back in the kitchen cooking from her Everything You Could Possibly Cook In Beige cookbook. Maria will be in the Chinese Takeaway/Opium Den room banging out an out of tune composition (cos it's now fucked after being moved) on the old Joanna. The paying guests will be sitting down to eat in a freezing cold room taking it in turns to warm their food up on the woodburner. That is of couse if any of those tits can be arsed to light it. Weeeee what jolly fun.
---

Yes he did that. If thats falling appart in such a short space of time, not a very good advert for his house building skills.

My darling @JackSpratt you are on fire. I feel they have really pissed you off. You go girl

 

[Maria Antonia Hb]

Easter bunny might be indisposed
Happy holidays everyone

 

[Luna20]

Fanny’s circling the wagons to protect the grift. Grant’s family looks a bit shellshocked. The Douche Lord might want to watch his back. Anne Marie has a temper and when that little neanderthal loses his shit it won’t be pretty.

ahahhahahaha Neanderthal. Can't wait for him to loose his shit like nasty did with Selmar!

 

[C'est moi]

I wonder if all the Randoms arrived in the rent-a-van and hatch-back (like a clown car).

Also, who is this Random lady?

They were just passing. Saw there was a bit of a do and thought they would mingle, winging it all the way.

 

[JackSpratt]

Well if that is the case I would think his girlfriend would do more to familiarise herself with the garden, cooking and running a basic business. Whilst Amaury may see the potential for self sufficiency within the chateau grounds, Natty is in no way the right partner for that aspiration. He is wasting the best years of his life (ie youth, no debt, no dependents, health) at the dump making radiator covers and waiting tables.

I'm beginning to think that is all he's capable of doing. Has he (pre Shitoo) ever actually worked for a living or just played at it under the watchful eye of Maman et Papa?

 

[HalcyonOrganic]

Happy Easter! A photo of the arrangement I made for Easter brunch. I’m not a professional, but I think it turned out nice!

View attachment 2088489

Can I be between you and Mr. Scorpion please?

Sitting at the table, I mean…

 

[MRShavershamsdress]

I agree, if Dan wanted his teeth fixed in order to improve his quality of life, then that's his business.
What I didn't like was the macho spiel about "Yeah, I could just get it fixed, it didn't bother me, but I went and did it anyway. Definitely not listening to the haydurs."
If Dan had been smart... yeah, I know... he'd have done a whole 8 part docu-vlog series. A bit of research, could he have it done in France or would it be better to have it done in Turkey. Does he really need to have veneers, bridges or implants.
Dan's teeth might not have been aesthetically pleasing, but they were his natural teeth. My opinion the procedure he got was overkill.

Knowing what I know now I would approach my replacements differently. Those that couldn’t be saved would’ve gotten individual implants and the rest perhaps veneers. I was tired of the constant pain and just wanted everything out!

 

[ploppityplop2]

Simone is Grant's wife. Finger refers to finger foods.

I thought it was finger everyone with a conscience 🫢

 

[lyna]

A first-timer observed:
View attachment 2083063
View attachment 2083085

The sugar mommy responded:
View attachment 2083067
View attachment 2083075

My mammy always said, The more you say, the less you prove...

 

[Imperious Me]

My issue is he is taking money from people and lying. She has posted on Instagram that she has left. His silence is deception and Patrons should not be lied to, nor should those watching YouTube off of which he earns income. And now something similar may be happening at another channel… lying about someone’s whereabouts. All part of the grift. They’ve all learned from the Chatelaine de Monetization.

I recon he's hoping she's gone to make hay then come crawling back. I noticed he's still wearing his wedding ring and still talks in 'we' terms...
---

I stopped believing what Selmar said during his Rant Tour 2023.

He said he do not know Michael Petherick, and he do not know Frank and Ivo and do not know where they live.
Two days later he said he do know F&I and know them from being near lalande.

And I can’t believe that Selmar do not know Michael. Michael has been to lalande multiple times until last year, and that was during the same time Selmar was still living at lalande.

Was Selmar included in any shenanigans when Michael was around though? She seemed to keep him all to herself, and they'd tour around other debauched chateaus when he came to visit, I can't recall Selmar being part of the company.. So maybe he didn't 'know' him, remember Selmar was lodging in his camper when he wasn't 'fixing' things.

 

[Luna20]

@Luna20 ?

A boerenkinkel
Nostrils is very boers, because he is a boerenkinkel.
---

I don't know BUT he can 'flikker op' (Means 'go away' in English but not so polite ) In fact maybe we should start calling him 'Flikker Flip' ?

Eeew no not flikker op! Because flikker is also used as a derogatory term for gay men. Flikker flip is however on point 🫢

Oprotten, rot op (rot away) is better means also go away
---
OMG! Johnny Depp is going to play Louis XV!
Period film with Johnny

 

[Madame de Pompanddoodoo]

I hope her village is one of the ones where the Mairie has decreed no new swimming pool installations due to the water shortages in France.

That wouldn’t stop Fanny she has a total disregard for rules and regulations as they do not apply to her. She openly flouts them in every aspect of her B and B business, continued to water the battlefield behind the chapel despite all the restrictions in force but never appears to be brought to task. Maybe her and the Marie and/or the local mp who invited her to Paris to talk to other politicos are more than good friends, as eyes are certainly turned where her behaviour is concerned.

 

[shatcho shiek]

when I read it it also stated that she has had a headace from her old house, how on earth would she cope with a stressful money pit chateau in the middle of nowhere and no income , no family support apart from sillymare , I believe her family reside not in europe? correct me if wrong.

 

[juniperroad]

Well guess what? Pink Jaguar’s post has vanished. Stephanie Jarvis should be haunted by Mmakhotso Moloi’s name for the rest of her life. SJ can scrub her YT comments section all she wishes but we all know that Mmakhotso died due to the neglect from both her place of education and her scholarship sponsors. SJ ought to be ashamed of herself for deleting that and 8 others agreed too.

Mmakhotso won’t get to have an Easter Egg hunt with her friends or family in the woods screaming weeeeee. Disgusting episode.

View attachment 2086374

I realize this is going against the grain here but my heart hurts when I see this. We don't know what happened. I in no way think SJ had anything to do with her death. I have donated to scholarship funds and would hate it if something happened to the person I donated to and peeps on the internet decide I'm responsible for a death. I just don't see how y'all are coming to the conclusion that she is responsible for this beautiful girl's death. To me, this is going way over the line and heading into defamation.

 

[Just Grift Wood]

Fanny is planting her own questions. Chloe Hutton is a long time alias and can't believe that ReBecca Shotton is real either. (who spells ReBecca???)

ReBecca Shotton
8h
Just curious, Stephanie do you pay for all the food for the entire house?

Stephanie Jarvis
3h
Yes, I do, I think it’s only right, as everyone is there to help on the chateau in one way or another, and at Easter I love to host my friends. In the past, before I had a ‘proper job’ with YouTube, my friends would all contribute at Easter, they’ve always been so supportive, but I stopped that as soon as the vlogs started doing well. Nothing makes me happier than having everyone here

Chloe Hutton
21min
I think running a Chambre d'hote is most definitely a "proper job"
---

Another garden visit in the next vlog - we all have that on our BINGO card!

Fanny is planting her own questions. Chloe Hutton is a long time alias and can't believe that ReBecca Shotton is real either. (who spells ReBecca???)

ReBecca Shotton
8h
Just curious, Stephanie do you pay for all the food for the entire house?

Stephanie Jarvis
3h
Yes, I do, I think it’s only right, as everyone is there to help on the chateau in one way or another, and at Easter I love to host my friends. In the past, before I had a ‘proper job’ with YouTube, my friends would all contribute at Easter, they’ve always been so supportive, but I stopped that as soon as the vlogs started doing well. Nothing makes me happier than having everyone here

Chloe Hutton
21min
I think running a Chambre d'hote is most definitely a "proper job"
---

Another garden visit in the next vlog - we all have that on our BINGO card!

Christine Wilkinson
9h
Was wondering how the pear trees and all the fruit trees planted in the kitchen garden last year are doing? Are they blooming yet?

Pauline Sugarman
7h
Me too!

Stephanie Jarvis
Yes, the pear trees are in bloom! I’ll try to film them in the next video

Chloe is the one along with Matthias who kept getting their questions deleted and pounced on by Becky Eater so would be surprised if she is an alias-but surprised still a patron. There are very few dissenting voices so that is why I remember the ones who are. Bacon eater hasn't been back for two flogs now.

 

[Elviemary]

Interesting comment on one of Billy's recent vlogs......someone mentioned Selmar and Billy says "that drunkard needs to stay off YouTube!"

Bit rich coming from Billy who often has a hangover whereas I've never seen Selmar drinking a lot, but who knows what goes on with these people.

 

[BigGreenMeany]

What cruel people you are with your egghunts!!! F4F is 48 she has very few eggs left if any (thank god).
---
Well considering Phiphis tight jeggings - i doubt that there is much movement in them swimmers either.

 

[Albee]

Well, I can't say I watched completely, but I did view two vlogs today. I haven't watched Curtis Ryan Woodside in quite some time. I like Egyptian stuff, just from real Egyptologists! Anyhow, I love Filippo, his husband. I didn't even make it to the 5 minute mark because as they're walking down the street, Curtis is saying people commented on his vlogs that he's spending too much time away from Filippo and that Filippo missed him. Filippo said "yes, I did miss you, did you miss me?" and he was stroking his head (admittedly, like he'd pet a dog) and Curtis made this face and recoiled away from Filippo as if to say "don't touch me".......it ticked me off, so I stopped watching.

View attachment 2087371

Then I started watching the woman from Seattle (the lady whose husband was a firefighter who died in NYC in the 9/11 attack). I fast forwarded all the way through it, with a minor stop in the middle for the reveal of a chandelier she had repaired. The chandelier was just beautiful! But, it was the most boring video I think I've ever attempted to watch (and that's saying something!). At the end, she talks about her roof, said she hasn't gotten quotes yet, says that based on people's comments she's reached out to Billy Petherick and - SURPRISE! - he hasn't responded. Then she went on a long-winded story about leaving to get her VISA squared, getting an appt. with the French consulate and it's all up in the air because she was trying to time the appointment with a visit to her son in NYC, but the consulate in NYC doesn't have any appointments. She can go to Washington DC during that time, though, because they do have appointments available. She says she's going to wait it out for an NYC appointment but in the meantime has overall angst and is worried she won't get an appointment anywhere (I think she's worried? I can't tell, but I know I'd be worried). The consulate in Los Angeles, where she'd need to go on the West Coast, doesn't have any appointments available either for the first week of May. What's the problem??? Make a freakin' appointment in Washington DC and be done with it! Problem solved! Boy, she can really over-complicate stuff. Then, she's worried because she has to surrender her passport when she has this appointment and she doesn't know for how long....which means she can't travel back to France. I was exhausted after watching just 5 minutes of her talking, which is a shame....I like her and want her to have some joy, and this chateau does seem to provide that to her.

I also fast forwarded thru her video. On one of my pauses I heard her say that she was told the roof was recently done. If this is not the case surely she can go back to the previous owners for giving false information. Seeing as France has that 10 year clause.

 

[Lochness Monster]

I'd bet odds at 100-1 that the Puffs didn't buy those Fortnum & Mason goodies. Snorty picked them up when he was in London and Fanny told a 'porky' when she said they were a gift from the Puffs. The Puff's ingratiated themselves by letting Fanny say the F&M goodies came from them.
---

We all have bunny bums. Did the Easter Bunny drink too much and face plant?

One 2019 Selmar Easter bunny

 

[Luna20]

Ok European fashionistas in the know I have always been under the impression that the French do mix navy and black also brown and black such as wearing brown shoes with a black suit. Oh well I must be committing a fashion faux pas on a regular basis.

Quelle horreur!
Navy & black both dark colours.
Mix black with contrasting colours. Grey/brown/navy won't make your outfit look well thought through. They are safe choices

Black suit, try red/blue/yellow/purple/nude/green or flower print shoesand burn the brown! Make it pop mama!


The only colour never to wear is beige. No one looked good in sad beige clothing, or sad beige homes with sad beige people