The Chateau Diaries #12 Carry on grifting

[Jeeves]

I'm not sure poor old Selmar has cottoned on ( or maybe he has?)

 

[RubyT]

Given the number of new members who have arrived here since Moaning Michael's vlog, he seem to have "done a Brenda" and scored a massive home goal. So many new posters saying that they were glad to find a place where they could question and complain. Wouldn't you think he'd have take a lesson from DB? All points to this being a knee-jerk reaction to being called out on his failure to post.

I have Been Patreon’s of both but of late began to doubt and question so have left and I hope many will follow

 

[Linus]

Regarding Marie's alleged harsh critique of the come dine with me malarkey, I for one am glad to see her developing a backbone finally. She used to be so limp and indecisive. It seems she's woken up a bit and realised that she's no longer the favourite poodle anymore.

She reads this forum, and we do give good advice

 

[Clara Burnett]

On the surface though Stephanie seems to be witty, charming, funny and intelligent. She cheers me up when I watch the videos. So this is disappointing. I do think though that her father dying had some to do with the lack of direction or work for quite a few years. She now seems to be willing to work hard on the videos to raise money and the rennovations to give us something to watch. You have to admit it’s compelling. Hell, we’re all on here bitching. That’s saying something. Jury is still out for me. But something just ain’t right.

You bet, something just ain’t right. We have been discussing that for a while now and though you are wise to only trust what you see, it’s kind of a good idea to also weigh the fact that she is editing herself, so basically only showing you what she wants you to see.
A lot of it is plain irresponsibility, not so much criminal intent of actually conning people out of their money, she truly believes she’s entitled to it for the “work” she’s putting in, a.k.a. the editing of contributions other people are giving to her lifestyle. She brags about her Oxford education but has never been in a situation where she had to actually work for money coming in. She’s the type of girl that, even in this day and age, thinks a man having dinner with her is supposed to pick up the tab “for having enjoyed her company”, an actual quote.
Have you watched her latest vlog? She seems to be thinking it’s completely normal to announce they are going to travel around multiple chateaux for their amateur version of ‘come dine with me’, never mind the pandemic, not even a side note they will wait till Covid is better controlled. It’s just unreal, the current situation is still alarming, even in the area she lives in, but hey, she can travel. France has ordered all home made masks to be obsolete and has banned them, so she might have to think twice about leaving the chateau without her fashionable accessories. She will though, better believe it.
Also, her self proclaimed ‘best friend’ has gotten himself in to a lot of legal trouble, the kind of thing all superfans and their sites are exploding over at the moment and she does nothing to publicly align herself with him? Sure, she made a statement about ‘being in it together’, but that was intended to piggyback the money train and to reroute it into her corner by pretending she’s been horribly bullied online too, poor thing. Seem to have worked if you look at all the comments by drooling fans.
No, we’re not all on here bitching. There’s a lot of genuine concern. It’s not okay to let the alcoholic man the liquor store and look away, just because she’s providing free booze and a compelling narrative. That's called enabling misery.

 

[ploppityplop2]

Nice write up! I would not be putting my order in for dinner at the chateau. SJ is not the gourmand she likes to think she is and her cooking skills are of the Betty Crocker variety. And of course, let's not forget that there seems to be absolutely no proper hygiene practices in the kitchen. I've seen people dip their fingers into shared food, comb their hair over the table, come in from outside and not wash their hands, and of course this is the shared space for the adhoc beauty salon. Poor Selmar, he really is out of his league when it comes to preparing food. He lacks imagination in this area. For someone with such an artistic bent it surprises me. Originally, he was going to make his damn apple cake, which is really a pie, with a banana thrown in! Why oh why? Then we find this boring but cute pastries with apple and banana, once again, why oh why would you mix apple and banana together unless you are making baby food. He didn't glaze them correctly because, as usual, someone doesn't/can't eat eggs. Egg yolk is the best for giving that wonderful and enticing shiny brown crust. I would just have glazed anyway and left one or two without. I just felt that SJ and the boys tried too hard with everything - the menu, the venue, the table setting - too much! They just never know when to stop. Plus I absolutely hate that RIDICULOUS BLUE GOWN - it wish it would catch on fire and be gone forever, of course, I wish no harm to the wearer.

That gown was pure Fanny Craddock!

 

[jjj667]

SJ goes on and on that her parents are self made. Is it all from the granny farms? And was there any other ‘sources of income’ during their granny farm days?

I have no idea. My knowledge only goes as far back as the early- mid-2000s.

I just wanted people to be aware that it's not right to represent yourself as someone who is in a huge house in the middle of France as if it was an inherited burden or you are financially struggling. The family has money, the boys invested have money, they all have enough to run the chateau without any support. This is someone wanting the Catherine Palace but not wanting to bankroll it. Excusing any external and structural work (there doesn't appear to be any? Other than cosmetic) this is all mere vanity. If you can't upkeep the property (which they can) but if not, sell it or sell your countless assets to bankroll your lifestyle.

I have looked at the chateau Patreon and it appears that monthly, via "fan" subscriptions £18,000 is being generated which equates to over £200,000 per year, meaning in 5 years (if this continues) they would have extracted over £1 million pounds pre-tax, is it taxed? Not including the additional private income, brand deals, and Youtube revenue. If they receive the latter two, it's not clear?

£200,000+ per year. WHAT?

 

[bibisilver]

People


Apologises i have no idea how to utilise this site to respond correctly - here is hoping.

As i said she showed respect (or faux) due to our ownership status and knowing her. However, she claimed to 'need' this economic avenue of income and was providing vlogs in return. My point was made that she now has thousands of 'masters' directing her vlogs via their likes and dislikes. This Chateau will never be her's, it will be completed on the backs of stupid Americans who are willing to pay up for a dream of FR seen in a 'good year' movie. True is we have had friends in common from UK and IR for years, she is claiming to be poor, and whilst she may have been cash poor at some stage, she most definitely has never been asset poor. People need to ask, and investigate - how can she afford to buy this place and she has never worked (opera singers (i have a dear friend who is one and lives a few miles from SJ) do not make this kind of money. How can she afford fees at oxford may led you to how she has afforded this all. Point is she is in no way poor and is aimining to complete this chateau via other peoples funds. The local Chateau owners are aware of this and are disapproving. And, don't start me on how the local French see this car crash situation - not good. Also they never have locals over...she is not living in rural FR at all. This is an illusion and people are buying into it. Disclaimer Yes sometimes it makes me angry as we work our ass off to keep this place going. And, no i would never sell my privacy for money. No thanks.

You do sound angry, and maybe a bit jealous of her free money too? I don't think there's a need to call anyone a "stupid American", and I'm not American, but it is offensive in my opinion to generalize like that. I bet there's more than one nationality supporting her as patrons or simply viewers for many reasons other than being stupid.

 

[La Brocanteuse]

Sorry, I can hold back no longer... While we all know that, in French, 'flower' is 'la fleur' please note that the chateau in Honfleur is called Le Fleur.

The marker -fleur, formerly -fleu which is widespread in Normandy (Cf. Barfleur, Vittefleur, Harfleur, Crémanfleur, Fiquefleur and La Gerfleur stream), which means 'stream, river running into the sea', was still in use in the 13th century as written in a document le fleu de Lestre, meaning the Lestre river.[5]

Also, I'm surprised no one jumped on this either (from YouTube):

"It's time for an Awfully Big Adventure! Marie, Philip and I jump into the car and escape from Lalande to explore another stunning chateau - Le Fleur in Honfleur. We finally meet it's charming owners, Anna & Philipp, after watching..."

 

[Frances Nicole]

That pie sounded rank though

I see the flaming mob is out tonight to get Marie on YT because SJ didn’t win!

oh my goodness I just went to read the comments! I can’t believe the sweet angel super fans are misbehaving!

Marie cooks Monday - Friday! she had to invent a whole competition to get Philip to pull his own weight. It’s obvious the viewers categorize the LaLande characters into upstairs/downstairs. How dare Philip and Stephanie have to actually COOK on a WEEEKEND!

 

[The Soloist]

From today's vlog. "We have all had covid tests" drive 6 hours. Stop at supermarket for food and flowers (ie public mixing). Arrive chateau. "We will eat seperately as we don't have our results until tomorrow". JMJ (catholic thing) how dumb are these people.

Having heard of 3 people I know over the past few days who have lost 5 loved ones before their time due to Covid I could punch the selfish bunch. All the fake safety rules like they did before where they sat Mummy away from everyone. All for the camera as usual.

 

[Jeeves]

Teacher head on here..... “THERE money????”

Fanny's degree was apparently in English, so I really can't imagine that slipping past her. Probably Baby Phil in his new role.

 

[Pno]

There is nothing wrong with buying/selling investment properties, especially to fund own pension/retirement. In fact it is admirable. Let's just leave it at the 5 properties owned/partially owned between SJ and IJ.

There is nothing admirable in convert begging and depicting yourself as unable to put food on the table without the aid of patrons.

 

[La Brocanteuse]

Given the number of new members who have arrived here since Moaning Michael's vlog, he seem to have "done a Brenda" and scored a massive home goal. So many new posters saying that they were glad to find a place where they could question and complain. Wouldn't you think he'd have take a lesson from DB? All points to this being a knee-jerk reaction to being called out on his failure to post.

Indeed. So let's summarise: a fake Christmas dinner to make the punters happy; a fake dead granny to make the unhappy punters happy; and then a bleedingly obvious oh woe is me post to explain his absence to the punters who aren't happy again which will make them all forget the accidental granny post. Can't wait to see what happens next.

 

[Viva La Loca]

I could picture the late great June Whitfield as 'Mummy' . Maybe all of the cast could be from 'Ab Fab' ?

Maggie Smith gets my vote as 'Mummy' from coquettish to steely in one easy move

 

[Lady Chatalot]

Maybe Selma chooses to stay in his van so he can go off as needed and find a signal for some ponovision. Selmas Wanker Van

I like to visualize Selmar just driving off into the sunset one lovely evening never to return as all the Lalanders stare after him in disbelief!

 

[FrannyBee]

LS (full credit to @MojoDublin before anyone thinks of creating a PoorMe vlog )

Jeeves Post 3681010 - I know MojoDublin is going to be cross with me for passing on more terrific ideas, but I suggest Joanne Lumley in the role of SJ. I see her as a cross between Patsy and a younger Hyacinth Bookay. I'm sure Joanne could pass as a 45 year old (or more importantly after a night on the tiles SJ could pass as a 75 year old) and I think she speaks French (or she can act that Frenchified rolling of R's and squealing of Mummeeee). I'm working on MPK, BJJ and Brenda ( Imight need some help with her as I never saw her on a vlog - was she camera shy?). Maybe Judy Dench for Mummeee but might be out of our budget as Production costs not yet set (ie how much it's going to cost to rent LaLaland as SJ can be notoriously difficult with money matters as she has to sell the idea to Mummee. Long way to go yet but just wanted to let MojoDublin I'm on to it and I'm after cocktails and DB's.

 

[NorrisCS]

Gotta rant here....

I'm sorry, this may just be me being pissy but why is it only "stupid Americans" that you're targeting here? They receive packages from all over the world and, gleaning from the comments, her Patrons are from all over the world, also. I am NOT a Patron but I am an American and I'm personally offended by this remark. And I do NOT get offended easily!

Rant over...sorry.

I know it’s like the drunken Irish.... shit... hold on... just knocked the wine over...

 

[Jeeves]

@Jeeves you have ditched barmy Brenda I see - good man !

It made me jump every time I saw it. I felt as though I was being stalked by a Hannibal Lecter/ Mrs. Doubtfire hybrid!

 

[FrannyBee]

I think I saw that on C4 but it was filmed some time ago. SJ's photos would be more current so maybe the brocante shopping trip was only for cameras but tat not actually bought.

Kickintheass Post 3669925 She's going to have to cut back on filming in the local brocantes and op shops 'cos if the crap gifts which keep turning up from the fans, and which are rejected by SJ and probably bagged up and sent to "donate", show up in filming and the fans see their gifts in a charity shop, there's going to be tears before bedtime. Patrons will be pulling the plug and no more Spode and Limoge for you my girl. No treats and chocolates in the same parcels. SJ note to self. "You have to drop names like "Spode" "Hermes" "Limoge" "Fortnum & Mason" more often. Tip - Film linen cupboard and bemoan difficulty in finding antique linen - would love some ...... (define items) Ditto - china room. Suggest cutlery room/cabinet required. Open empty cabinet and bemoan lack of antique cutlery, silver trays, silver anything - need to be specific to avoid EPNS and Glass (too easily broken) I can hear the creaking of china cabinet doors opening everywhere and the fans going through grandma's and Great Aunt Agatha's bottom drawers from Kansas City to Toronto just to hear a thank you from SJ on CATC - Tip to fans. To ensure you get a proper thank you (insert squeal here) check china for maker's make (no made in Japan) and cutlery etc (no EPNS) and first maybe check with your local antique dealer or Jeweller as some items can be very valuable and you may wish to re-think your "donation" - some Spode can be worth 100's of pounds and some antique silver very valuable.

 

[The Soloist]

I was just thinking of the Hotel Inspector a bit ago. She would have a hey day at the shat-o! First thing she would do is clear out all those volunteers and hire professionals. Next, clean up big time! No Marie Kondo nonsense for her. Get down and scrub those toilets. Toss out the dust collectors. Organize that kitchen. Get some decent heat going. Fix the damn shutters. Do something with the exterior. I don't know, it may be too much even for the Hotel Inspector.

Now there is a programme idea. The Chateau Inspector. I might pitch it to Channel 4.