The advice thread for random problems #3

[Snippysnips]

I’ve got my driving test tomorrow. Except my driving instructor as gone into labour. We were meant to have lessons today and tomorrow. I’ve forgotten how to reverse park. I tried in my husbands car yesterday but completely fucked it. If I pass it’s going to be a total fluke.

Is there another instructor from the same company that can give you a lesson? My brother was a driving instructor an he used to say the worst anyone ever done was before their test, he used to joke that all your bad moments had to come out before it, the lesson before my test I curbed the car, pulled out in front of someone at a round a bout, an used the wrong lane, it was such a friggin disaster that I was dreading my actual test but I passed completely fine

If you feel nerves will take over, I used rescue remedy a hour before my test an also right before my test

 

[OwlAtTheMoon]

I adore a hot bath and cannot imagine living without a bath.

I'm the same. Love a bath.

 

[MeghanSnarkle]

Ugh, that’s awful! My little girl’s coats and bags are kept in the classroom, but she had her lovely rain coat thrown on the floor and stamped on by the horrible kids (there’s a little gang of 4 boys that act like thugs) in her class. If that’s happening I would raise it with the head teacher and say it’s unacceptable and tell them they need to address that behaviour with the older boys.

some children aren’t great with making sure they have their stuff with them and that’s one thing, but if there’s a trend for children to proactively ruin other’s possessions that’s quite another and has to be dealt with.

Yes I agree completely, I think it really shocks younger children to have something taken or damaged at school
walking out yesterday, having to admit defeat with the coat it made think of the number of times I've heard of the year 6 lads here taking other childrens bags and lobbing them into the bins or skips for the fun of it but to the younger kids affected it's stealing their things from them, Sad.

 

[QueenBW]

Ok am on day two of this so am just gonna ask lol, on the computer its showing the full image of the picture, however no matter how much I try it will not print the full image, I've tried the option scale to paper size an tried both letter and A4 an still it will not work, I only need the page printed with that picture on it

My boss has been off two weeks an off this week with COVID an I need it done before the weekend as the training is on then

There might be a better way, but since you already tried the scale bit and if you only need the picture could you do a print screen, crop it, paste it into a different document, maybe a Word doc that is easier to manage, and just print that document?

 

[OnlyHereForTheLolz]

In a film directed by one of the greatest directors ever you think Florence Pugh had enough sway and influence to demand she gets her breasts out? Holy misogyny…

Yes I do. You don’t have to be a misagonist to not be a fan of seeing others naked all the time.
The fact that miss Pugh is constantly half naked irl tells me enough.
Maybe you should look past all your newly minted phrases at the actual “celebrity”. The breast brought absolutely zero to the film. There’s a reason why they stick out

 

[Kim Mild]

Laundry question - I have a Habitat cotton throw and the label says ‘FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DONT WASH ME’ but what is the worst that could happen? I am shit at laundry (and house plants) but I want this clean and fresh. Am I destined to ruin it completely if I give it a cold hand wash cycle in the machine?

View attachment 2232272

I think it will become too heavy for the machine and take forever to dry .
Hand wash it in the bath?

 

[Thank(space)you]

How do you know if you have been blocked by someone on WhatsApp? The person’s privacy was such that it has never said if they are online/last seen etc.

I read that if you’re blocked, you would not be able to add the person to a new group. I have tried this this morning and I am able to set up a new group with them, but my message to them from last night is still showing one grey tick.

Have they blocked me?
---


Thornton Hall on the Wirral is really nice

Did they have a profile pic? If so & it's disappeared then they've blocked you

 

[TheGlossy]

My brother organized an appointment at the notary to sign a tax document to close a probate.

This probate has been ongoing for more than a year and all documents listed in the list of required documents were provided.

The appointment is this afternoon and the notary has been hassling me since 10am for my ID. I’m at work and can’t provide it because I don’t carry my passport with me.

I don’t understand why this person is now hassling me every hour before the appointment for a document that should have been requested more than a year ago and never was.

I just on top of this found out she didn’t ask anyone else involved in the inheritance/probate process for their ID. She’s only asked for mine.

Not only that but instead of telling me why she needs a document that’s not been asked nor required for anyone else, she acts sneaky by opening her email with ‘Unless I’m mistaken, you have not provided you ID’.

Then she follows up with a rude follow-up email two hours later saying ‘Once again, can you please provide me with your ID’.

Like I’m located overseas and my only ID from that country is my passport. I don’t walk around with my passport.

The nerve of making it sound as though it is a required document I forgot to send a year ago and thinking it’s OK to hassle me repeatedly when it’s clear people are at work.

In any case, she’s not getting the ID unless I understand why she needs mine specifically and no one else’s. I’m not the executor nor am I getting a cent from this probate and therefore do not owe a cent in taxes.

 

[TwooTwooTwitTwitTwoo]

Uninsured driver hit my car yesterday and made off. It’s going to cost me more to claim on my insurance and put my price up next year, so I’m attempting to fix it myself.

Theres scuff marks on my bumper, can I use a magic sponge to buff it off or will it further ruin the paint? There’s a bit I need to touch in with a paint pen, is this hard to do?!

Any recommendations for products that help will be gratefully received! So angry every time I look at it!

Bit of a random one, but if you happen to have access to industrial grade cleaning wipes, they might remove some of it. I had a painted door v silver car mishap and they removed the vast majority of paint transfer. The touch up kit should sort the rest.

 

[tomato_paste]

That definitely sets me off occasionally but no one in the office has noticeable perfume!

Wondering if it's just more dust being blown around by the fans lately or even something outside. Weird

Could be mould? I get those symptoms, it's similar to hayfever but I only react when mould spores are "high" or "very high". Claritin or similar work well for me to manage those symptoms.

 

[littlepup]

I'm in my late 20s. I've got no friends. I'm married, no kids. Where can I find online groups to join to find people to do things together? It is not easy to just go outside and meet others. Any advice?

Sign up for some classes for something that interests you but allows for interaction with others. Sewing, community gardening, netball team, the WI etc.
Getting a shift in a local pub, one that has regulars and is quiet enough that you need to engage with the customers is also a great way to meet people, become familiar with local faces and get used to speaking to people you don’t know.

 

[cowtastrophe]

I don‘t know if I’m looking for advice specifically, I suppose I just want to know if I did the wrong or right thing.

Long story short, I occasionally help out managing an Airbnb. A guest has turned up who is clearly suffering from some severe mental health issues and not taking his meds. I ended up having to go and welfare check him twice over the weekend on my own and today it all blew up when his family called me and basically dumped the whole lot in my lap. I had to call the police and spent hours on the phone to mental health services who were fucking useless. I didn’t even want to get involved but there was an incident where he approached some random people outside the flat and tried to get them to come in. I think it’s sort of resolved for now though he wouldn’t leave as he’d paid but now my manager is implying I blew things out of all proportion and I’m really fucked off. The flat is apparently a mess and a new guest is due in the same day he’s saying he will leave.

The first thing the police did was remove all the knives and scissors but apparently I overreacted.

 

[CallMeHollywood]

Nah she just really really hates children. Like I say I think that reaction was to do with the MIL obsessing about my little one, and if she was there it would have 100% resulted in comments like “don’t you want one” etc etc, which I completely appreciate is annoying but she didn’t tell me that. Also that’s just me interpreting the situation, I went for the ceremony and her MIL pounced on me and offered to babysit, which is massively weird. Or maybe she just despises my daughter, which was the impression I got from what she said

I would split your day so your daughter (and you) aren’t affected by her actions or words at Christmas. Tell your parents you have plans in the afternoon so you’ll pop over in the morning with presents. With that strong of a reaction, she may have a problem she’s not ready to talk about yet.

 

[CoffeeMamma]

They are the new look ones. Couldn’t see the rips in the photo. I may add some other material into them then.

I would patch them with something cute, personally. The New Look ones have quite a high elastane content and don’t mend well in my experience

 

[Blondeangel2515]

Oh come on, grow up! You’re looking more like a psycho ex. You can reiterate he messaged you as many times as you like but it’s making you look worse. It’s a harsh truth but move on.

Not half truth and I am grown up I’ve let a girl know she’s been mugged off again and at least she knows and is aware of this now she has the information and she can do whatever she wants with that info it’s her choice.
I know I’ve done the right thing and I’m not in the wrong with what I done I know if I was in her position I would want to know

 

[MeghanSnarkle]

I obsessively name my son’s stuff in odd places because the older kids would swap the coats just to create chaos, then other children would decide they liked the “new” coat better is it clearly named etc so they can check lost property? Agree with above it should be dealt with.
Someone took two pairs of wellies from my son and I spoke to the teacher , explaining it just wasn’t good enough. Those had his name in, in marker so they’d been taken home. They had an assembly about taking things

Thanks for the reply good to know it's not just a problem at our school tbh,
We were recommended not to use name labels but to actually write it in with marker and yeah I'm a bit of a stickler for it on everything he takes to school, hes still saying the big boys steal off pegs apparently his little class mates barbie brolly has also been 'pinched' so I think it's older silly beggars messing about in the corridor .... gives me hope it might turn up though.

 

[JoeBloggs]

I got a text saying I need to pay a toll for driving in London. I can’t drive and haven’t been to London in ages so it’s obviously a san. However, I’m a bit concerned about where it’s come from as it does link me directly to the transport for London website implying it’s an actually from there so I’m a little worried I might get a penalty for something I didn’t do.

They won’t text you, they will write to the address of the registered car.

 

[ShadesMint]

sorry to hear this. We are going through something similar with my in laws. We tried reasoning but in the end we just had to be brutally honest with the situation, he didn’t like it and still stuck by his wifes side and we give up.

is he vulnerable? What do your siblings want to do about it? X

Thanks for your message. He's vulnerable in the sense that I think he is undiagnosed on the autism spectrum, just the way he is makes me think that. I have a feeling he may have 'love bombed' her, and doesn't want to lose her, so goes along with whatever she wants. One of my brothers lived with them both during lockdown and apparently she was super controlling, not letting him finish sentences etc, that was before he sold his house. His behaviour has changed since he has met her, he has given up a lot of his interests, and it's always her way or no way.
My siblings don't like her.. they get on with her, but only for my Dad's sake. They've tried talking to my Dad as well and he just brushes them off.

Are there any times when he is naturally alone (does she always pop out on a Sat morning for example, or does she work?). It might be a good idea to pop in unannounced on one of those times and just say you really wanted to see him and go for a walk or something. At the end you could say how much you've valued time alone with your Dad and ask to do it again. I get that he thinks she's vulnerable and has to stay with her but you're vulnerable too as your his daughter and still need a bit of protecting by Dad.

Thank you for responding. Unfortunately, she works from home and they both live in a flat. They both live out of the area now, about 1 hr drive away. I suppose I could 'pop in', or arrange a walk when she's working or something, I might suggest that to him actually. I think he would time it with his partner's work/lunch time and ask her along too though, which makes it super awkward because I don't then want to say 'Actually, I was wondering if my Dad could come on his own...'
They've made quite a few big purchases since my Dad sold his house, which makes me wonder whether it is what he really wants. He's had her whole flat redecorated, new flooring etc and they're just about to fit a new kitchen.. I have no idea what their arrangement is either, whether he pays her rent, or helps with bills, or even whether his name is on the mortgage (highly doubt it, as he's retired).
I feel like if they were to split up, he'd have nothing - no house, and little money.

 

[xbxbx]

Oh you poor thing. That sounds like absolute hell. It’s awful when home doesn’t feel like a safe place anymore.

There’s minimum risk in sending an anonymous letter of course, as long as you’re careful not to disclose any identifying details - eg don’t get too specific on your location in relation to their apartment.

I’d certainly give them the opportunity to address it before escalating. But if that fails, do you know the landlord or letting agents and could you contact them directly if so?

What Is Classed as Noisy Neighbours and How to Deal with Them? | Ellis & Co

Learn about how to handle noisy neighbours. Our guide offers practical tips, including mediation options, landlord involvement, and how to file a complaint.

www.ellisandco.co.uk

You may have already seen such info, but it seems to sum up your rights quite well.

When I had issues with my previous neighbour I contacted the council but they were pretty useless. They advised they would send a warning letter first but when I called back for an update a few weeks later (and to report no change) they told me no letter had been sent and there was no record of my complaint. They said they would send out another letter but I don’t believe it happened. They also refused to send someone out from the noise team (blamed covid restrictions even though there were none at this point) and told me to call the police if it keeps happening. I don’t think they wanted to deal with it because it’s private rent.

I did have to call the police a few times for noise and domestic violence concerns but again, they were also pretty useless and failed to show more than once.

I haven’t been able to find details of the landlord or letting agency. When I knew the previous neighbour had moved out I checked out all websites I could think of to see if it was advertised for rent again but nothing ever came up. I think it’s being rented out to people they know, hence similar circumstances, rather than being advertised professionally.

I guess I should take comfort in the fact that I know the end is in sight. This isn’t a forever situation and I will be out of it soon enough, although I do worry about who my neighbours will be wherever I move to next. It’s sad that my experience of buying my first property has been tainted by this but hey, we live and learn.

Thank you for the advice

 

[stargirl23]

Not the same company but others I’ve found great quick response messaging them
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