I'm too much of a pussy these days to actually do anything. I just get overwhelmed with thoughts sometimes.
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I totally agree! It is so reasonable to want that from friends.
I know what you mean, sometimes it is hard to open up and talk to friends about our lives, and I imagine a lot of us feel the same way!
That is natural, with everything going on at the moment it is even harder.
Please don't feel too badly about it. You mention she has confidence problems. It really is entirely possible that she just couldn't speak to you.
I've been in her position. People who knew me years ago would probably be surprised that I'd suffer from the extent of social anxiety I have in recent years.
It's possible she didn't even mean to be rude.
I've found eye contact hard (and still do sometimes) and sometimes when I talk, to say thank you if someone holds a door or allows me past for instance , it comes out as barely a whisper. I always worry I could be perceived as rude.
If you know her and she's friendly by message, maybe give her the benefit of the doubt.
Once again the GP has let me down
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Are they not taking anything further forward as your partner states he's fine? This must be so challenging and so tough on you. It should be something professionals are looking into and taking on board what you're saying so they can act upon it before it gets worse/he harms himself/someone else. Have you maybe tried to talk to a drug addiction agency about what he's experiencing to see if they can offer help in the sense with cannabis? Or maybe social work? I'd keep on at nhs24 - I don't know where you're from but Scotland has a dedicated mental health line via 111. They should be taking you seriously on matters like this, especially with how distressed he is. It's a horrible world when you're asking for support and literally no one wants to help you out.
Is there anything that could distract you from having these thoughts? Perhaps you could upload some of your photos, onto the photo thread that you started. I really enjoy looking at your photos, especially the ones of your cat.
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My grandfather fell again but this time in the vegetable garden. It was 2 a.m. before he was able to reach his smart watch and call for help. I feel so out of control and wish there was something I could say or do in this situation. I hate thinking of him lying there.
there are some much smaller things that can be worn with just buttons to press to call family for help. may be worth a look, my grandmother benefits from them as she falls often now
Yes, more cat photos for us all please. Nothing cheers me up more than a cute cat or dog.
Could yous maybe get him in touch with a community alarm? You can wear it around your neck or wrist and 24/7 in case something happens. I hope your grandfather is OK and not hurt
To be honest, I don't think I will give her the benefit of the doubt. She lacks confidence, but she has no issues approaching people. I worked with her for three years and saw how proactive she was in engaging with people. Lack of confidence and social anxiety don't always go hand in hand. I don't want to vilify her, but when you haven't seen someone in years, the least you can do is acknowledge them (a smile would have been sufficient).
The reality is that she is the type of person who will message you, ask for how are you for the sake of it and then start talking about herself non-stop as if you were her therapist. Pre-COVID, we went for a coffee together after I had left the company, she didn't even ask me how are you. I asked her how are you and she literally kept talking about herself for 2 whole hours. Not once did she ask anything about how I was doing in my new job or my new company or anything. Zero. The whole two hours were basically a monologue about how much she disliked her job and how difficult it's been to find a new one (rinse and repeat via text).
I think it was a one way street type of acquaintance. She can be friendly by message, but she takes no interest in me, so that's the additional factor to the fact that she ignored me. It's not worth it in my opinion and I need to recognize the signs telling me it's time to let go.
Oh dear. I can see why you are upset. Seems like moving on is the best thing. To not even ask about how things are with you is very one way.
I am literally on my last legs with life today. I had to get out qnd sit under a tree in the park to stop me smashing up my apartment and myself. I just can’t take the constant monotony and hell that is waking up, working, dealing with people I don’t choose to have in ky life, not having people I love in my life that I choose, not having a pet, never having kids or a husband or a good damn family that gives a tit. I literally have nothing and today I can’t deal with it!
Apologies long post ahead.... bit of a rant really but also could do with some support...
After a short but very serious relationship where I was horrendously messed about I not only found out that my ex had been cheating on me while we were together (let's call her Girl A) but that he was already in a relationship with someone when I met him and I had absolutely no idea (Girl B). Bit of background context...
Girl A: Never met her or heard of her before until she reached out on Instagram to tell me what had been going on. They were seeing each other for a couple of months and apparently it was only ever a bit of fun (this is while I was recovering from an operation as well). She was led to believe that I was his ex but then after we ended found out that we were still together. We chatted a lot and actually seemed to get on really well so had even talked about meeting up for a drink
Girl B: Was actually separated from his childhood best mate when they got together (obviously not friends anymore). She was with my ex for about 8 months and were apparently on a break when he met me. I only knew her maiden name - he told me she was his ex - and yes doing what girls do I looked her up when we first met. I knew she was on social media but I couldn't see her so I guess she blocked me when she found out I was seeing him. (I did the same thing to the girl he took out on the same day he broke up with me for good). Apparently she was absolutely heartbroken by him
I knew that the two of them knew each other as it was Girl A who told me the truth about Girl B however that they weren't good friends as she didn't know they were seeing each other until after she wasn't seeing him anymore (only ever knew the girl's first name). However last week Girl B asked Girl A if she could meet up for a coffee. I went to message Girl A on that night to see how it went only to discover that she had blocked me from contacting her in any way!
I've honestly racked my brains thinking of anything that I could have done or said for this to happen, or that Girl B could have told Girl A (she genuinely doesn't know me). But I honestly can't think of a single thing - I really haven't done anything wrong and I'm beyond hurt by this, as well as still being heartbroken over the end of my relationship. I know there's probably nothing I can do but I suffer massively from anxiety as it is - especially around what other people think of me - we live in a small town as well so I'm convinced there's al sorts of rumours going round about me! Any advice or support really would be greatly appreciated. I should probably add as well that the man in question has blocked all 3 of us and is now seeing someone else so I'm sure it's not anything that's come from him....
After a short but very serious relationship where I was horrendously messed about I not only found out that my ex had been cheating on me while we were together (let's call her Girl A) but that he was already in a relationship with someone when I met him and I had absolutely no idea (Girl B). Bit of background context...
Girl A: Never met her or heard of her before until she reached out on Instagram to tell me what had been going on. They were seeing each other for a couple of months and apparently it was only ever a bit of fun (this is while I was recovering from an operation as well). She was led to believe that I was his ex but then after we ended found out that we were still together. We chatted a lot and actually seemed to get on really well so had even talked about meeting up for a drink
Girl B: Was actually separated from his childhood best mate when they got together (obviously not friends anymore). She was with my ex for about 8 months and were apparently on a break when he met me. I only knew her maiden name - he told me she was his ex - and yes doing what girls do I looked her up when we first met. I knew she was on social media but I couldn't see her so I guess she blocked me when she found out I was seeing him. (I did the same thing to the girl he took out on the same day he broke up with me for good). Apparently she was absolutely heartbroken by him
I knew that the two of them knew each other as it was Girl A who told me the truth about Girl B however that they weren't good friends as she didn't know they were seeing each other until after she wasn't seeing him anymore (only ever knew the girl's first name). However last week Girl B asked Girl A if she could meet up for a coffee. I went to message Girl A on that night to see how it went only to discover that she had blocked me from contacting her in any way!
I've honestly racked my brains thinking of anything that I could have done or said for this to happen, or that Girl B could have told Girl A (she genuinely doesn't know me). But I honestly can't think of a single thing - I really haven't done anything wrong and I'm beyond hurt by this, as well as still being heartbroken over the end of my relationship. I know there's probably nothing I can do but I suffer massively from anxiety as it is - especially around what other people think of me - we live in a small town as well so I'm convinced there's al sorts of rumours going round about me! Any advice or support really would be greatly appreciated. I should probably add as well that the man in question has blocked all 3 of us and is now seeing someone else so I'm sure it's not anything that's come from him....
Just walk away from the whole lot of them. It’s beyond messy. The two other girls are always going to be a connection to him. just chalk it up to experience, walk away from the entire situation and move on with your life. This is drama you just don’t need.
@BettyCrockerr is right. Walk away from the mess and forget about the women. I genuinely suspect that’s what girl A decided to do. It’s nothing personal on you, but now she’s just done with it. That or she’s pissed he’s blocked her (she was only casual, so had no real investment in it, but equally had no reason to carry it on as well). Either way, who cares - they are just women that had sex with your ex. You may have got on, but you didn’t know her and haven’t lost anything. Chalk it down to experience and just work on getting over the ex as quickly as possible.
i'm really sorry all this happened to you! you say you blocked the next girl he took out on a date - but i'm sure you don't dislike her or anything like that it's just painful for you - so look at it from that perspective, probably it's the same for the others.
I think he must have been immobilized from the position he was in. I’m sorry about your grandmotherthere are some much smaller things that can be worn with just buttons to press to call family for help. may be worth a look, my grandmother benefits from them as she falls often now
I wish we could wrap our loved ones in bubble wrap.Thank you. I think he is okay now but it breaks my heart. He has put up such a fight against growing old. He was doing his own maintenance on his roof a few years ago just to prove he’s fit. My mother is the one who is handling his care. For my mental health I’ve stopped talking to her about it. The only thing for me to do is to call him. We speak every week and my mind is drawing a blank on what to say.Could yous maybe get him in touch with a community alarm? You can wear it around your neck or wrist and 24/7 in case something happens. I hope your grandfather is OK and not hurt
@BettyCrockerr And/or to anyone else who wants to chime in their perspective. Do you remember a few posts back when I talked about my doubts in my “online relationship”?
I wanted to hold off on breaking up because just this past Sunday we met for his early birthday celebration and Monday was his actual birthday.
Now my questions are when would be the right time? What do I do if he questions my ability to make a decision because I can be indecisive (and he’s admitted that, which he is not wrong)? And how to I carefully break it off without being an asshole about it but also say I’d like to be friends? He feels especially close but I don’t feel the same. I love him but just more as I friend.
Bare in mind since we’re mostly online due to long distance, I will have to do this through video chat.
This whole thing is eating me up and it’s strange when your family/friends are more excited about you in a relationship than you are.
I wanted to hold off on breaking up because just this past Sunday we met for his early birthday celebration and Monday was his actual birthday.
Now my questions are when would be the right time? What do I do if he questions my ability to make a decision because I can be indecisive (and he’s admitted that, which he is not wrong)? And how to I carefully break it off without being an asshole about it but also say I’d like to be friends? He feels especially close but I don’t feel the same. I love him but just more as I friend.
Bare in mind since we’re mostly online due to long distance, I will have to do this through video chat.
This whole thing is eating me up and it’s strange when your family/friends are more excited about you in a relationship than you are.
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