could you maybe just say to her direct that you’d really like a girly day to do something without the boys? Maybe the boys could go out and do something they want to do together and then the two of you could spend some time together without them? Or could you ask her out one evening - go for a girly night/pizza/cinema etc?
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The lovely person I started seeing is very quiet and aloof and introverted and I am the opposite - talks a lot, likes going to places and doing new things, very touchy feely. I’m nervous if I am overwhelming or annoying to him, and I get anxious and worry about it constantly. 
I have horrid social anxiety so I get pretty sad just being in my own head. He’s told me several times that he just doesn’t speak much (and it rings true with everyone in his life, people always initiate and he responds. He’s very socially awkward). But I can’t help but feel a bit unwanted. I’m hoping to find a way to not overthink much because otherwise it keeps triggering my MH conditions for no reason. I picked up a cute little guitar pick for him just because (he’s an avid guitarist). Now I’m too nervous to just give it to him. I thought it was cute in my mind but maybe I’ll come off as an overwhelming cow, idk. I am just very expressive and he really is not.
I have horrid social anxiety so I get pretty sad just being in my own head. He’s told me several times that he just doesn’t speak much (and it rings true with everyone in his life, people always initiate and he responds. He’s very socially awkward). But I can’t help but feel a bit unwanted. I’m hoping to find a way to not overthink much because otherwise it keeps triggering my MH conditions for no reason. I picked up a cute little guitar pick for him just because (he’s an avid guitarist). Now I’m too nervous to just give it to him. I thought it was cute in my mind but maybe I’ll come off as an overwhelming cow, idk. I am just very expressive and he really is not.
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Don't stress about the chairs - I am currently 22 stones and I go to the dentist twice a year with no issues, so don't worry!I'm worrying about going to the dentist. I'm massively overweight now and have googled that some of the chairs max out at 18 stone. Thank god this is an anon site where I can admit I weigh over that
I have tooth ache right now and am panicking so much about booking a dentist appointment incase the chair won't hold me!
I know this might sound ridiculous but I can't stop worrying about it. And maybe it's the millionth reason to try and lose weight but it really seems impossible at the moment
I got drunk for the first time in over a year last night. My tolerance is nonexistent now so just two ciders did me in. Still had a third.
I don’t know how I was ever okay with it. It was actually extremely scary.
I don’t know how I was ever okay with it. It was actually extremely scary.
I don't know if this is venting per se, but I need to exteriorize this as I feel more and more stupid as time goes on.
Ever since I can remember, I've always had a type. Every single guy I met/dated came close to this "ideal" in my head, but not a single of them was the exact embodiment of what I exactly envisioned in my mind. It was a whole package, from the physical aspects to the personality traits. I even went as far as drafting a 6 page list describing this "ideal" man. The list was drafted in 2018, when I had met someone who came rather close, but I knew wasn't what I was looking for. Again, all of these guys seem to display all the characteristics on paper, but I just knew from the get go there was something missing.
Fast forward, here comes 2019 when I entered the most critical and character shaping year of my twenties. I moved into a company I had severe doubts about and it was slowly eating away consuming my confidence. I was deeply unhappy there and the last thing I wanted to do was befriend anybody at this company. I just wanted to leave. Yet, by some twist of events, it became the most social professional experience of my entire life. I remember sitting at my desk minding my own business and feeling this glance towards me every single a specific person walked past. I didn't notice it at first, but after a few weeks, I notice it's always this same guy. I was so closed off not wanting to deal with anyone that I hadn't even noticed his existence when under normal circumstances, I would have certainly noticed him the moment he set a foot in the office. From the moment I noticed it was him who kept glancing, it seemed as though the Universe was conspiring to put us on the same path. I had never ever ran into the same person so many times in my entire life, especially someone I didn't directly work with in an office of 2,500 people and 3 buildings. I didn't even run into my own teammates as much as I did with this guy. I won't dive into the details of the interesting encounters, because it would be far too long. He was so gorgeous, polite, smiley whenever he was around. The most charming guy I have ever seen and met in my entire life! His energy was simply mesmerizing, a true manifestation of the type I'd be into. It was more than just the physical appearance. I wouldn't know how to explain, but generally, if it's just based on physical appearance infatuation, you simply get that instinctual basic feeling. I was attracted to him, but it wasn't that usual instinct you get when you see an attractive person. It wasn't it at all. I've had that countless times and even experienced that with someone else during that time, but it wasn't that. I really cannot explain into words because it's an odd type of attraction.
I left the company a year ago and I haven't seen this guy since February 2020, but my mind is still right where it was in 2019. I can't shake him. I don't know what it is. I'm a 31 year old woman with a very logical mind, a busy lifestyle and rather decent prospects, but he's still there haunting my memory and mind almost two years later. I don't recall experiencing this type of long-lasting "crush" on someone I haven't dated. I don't particularly want to get him off my mind either, but I feel rather juvenile pining over a guy as if I were 15 in high school and day dreaming about the cute guy in my arts class. It is an absolutely ridiculous feeling, but nothing seems to be working. I'm extremely busy at work, studying part-time on the side, running every day, investing in myself yet he's still there. Even when I had a rich social life pre-pandemic, I couldn't shake him then. I'm quite mad at the Universe because I didn't want to join that company in the first place, but needed the salary increase despite the fact that the job was downright horrible. Now, I'm stuck with the memory of a "crush" I haven't had a chance with on top of this. I wonder why the Universe put him in my path if it's to have me pine over the memory of him. I sometimes wish I could actually live a real romance happy ending in real life instead of a romanticized/idealized version in my dreams. Nothing has changed from my high school days. I'm still the girl who crushes and dreams about a cute guy, but that's where the story ends. It's quite disheartening and I feel completely dumb. I'm starting to think I'm the problem.
This story is certainly pointless next to other posts on here, but I felt the need to exteriorize this.
Ever since I can remember, I've always had a type. Every single guy I met/dated came close to this "ideal" in my head, but not a single of them was the exact embodiment of what I exactly envisioned in my mind. It was a whole package, from the physical aspects to the personality traits. I even went as far as drafting a 6 page list describing this "ideal" man. The list was drafted in 2018, when I had met someone who came rather close, but I knew wasn't what I was looking for. Again, all of these guys seem to display all the characteristics on paper, but I just knew from the get go there was something missing.
Fast forward, here comes 2019 when I entered the most critical and character shaping year of my twenties. I moved into a company I had severe doubts about and it was slowly eating away consuming my confidence. I was deeply unhappy there and the last thing I wanted to do was befriend anybody at this company. I just wanted to leave. Yet, by some twist of events, it became the most social professional experience of my entire life. I remember sitting at my desk minding my own business and feeling this glance towards me every single a specific person walked past. I didn't notice it at first, but after a few weeks, I notice it's always this same guy. I was so closed off not wanting to deal with anyone that I hadn't even noticed his existence when under normal circumstances, I would have certainly noticed him the moment he set a foot in the office. From the moment I noticed it was him who kept glancing, it seemed as though the Universe was conspiring to put us on the same path. I had never ever ran into the same person so many times in my entire life, especially someone I didn't directly work with in an office of 2,500 people and 3 buildings. I didn't even run into my own teammates as much as I did with this guy. I won't dive into the details of the interesting encounters, because it would be far too long. He was so gorgeous, polite, smiley whenever he was around. The most charming guy I have ever seen and met in my entire life! His energy was simply mesmerizing, a true manifestation of the type I'd be into. It was more than just the physical appearance. I wouldn't know how to explain, but generally, if it's just based on physical appearance infatuation, you simply get that instinctual basic feeling. I was attracted to him, but it wasn't that usual instinct you get when you see an attractive person. It wasn't it at all. I've had that countless times and even experienced that with someone else during that time, but it wasn't that. I really cannot explain into words because it's an odd type of attraction.
I left the company a year ago and I haven't seen this guy since February 2020, but my mind is still right where it was in 2019. I can't shake him. I don't know what it is. I'm a 31 year old woman with a very logical mind, a busy lifestyle and rather decent prospects, but he's still there haunting my memory and mind almost two years later. I don't recall experiencing this type of long-lasting "crush" on someone I haven't dated. I don't particularly want to get him off my mind either, but I feel rather juvenile pining over a guy as if I were 15 in high school and day dreaming about the cute guy in my arts class. It is an absolutely ridiculous feeling, but nothing seems to be working. I'm extremely busy at work, studying part-time on the side, running every day, investing in myself yet he's still there. Even when I had a rich social life pre-pandemic, I couldn't shake him then. I'm quite mad at the Universe because I didn't want to join that company in the first place, but needed the salary increase despite the fact that the job was downright horrible. Now, I'm stuck with the memory of a "crush" I haven't had a chance with on top of this. I wonder why the Universe put him in my path if it's to have me pine over the memory of him. I sometimes wish I could actually live a real romance happy ending in real life instead of a romanticized/idealized version in my dreams. Nothing has changed from my high school days. I'm still the girl who crushes and dreams about a cute guy, but that's where the story ends. It's quite disheartening and I feel completely dumb. I'm starting to think I'm the problem.
This story is certainly pointless next to other posts on here, but I felt the need to exteriorize this.
Sometimes it just happens that way. Don't stress too much. You're not dumb or juvenile. Enjoy what you're feeling when it's enjoyable and block it out when it's less fun.
One day someone else will come along and rock your world even more.
I really need to get this out and feel like somebody has listened to me and understood my side. I know I’m probably overreacting but everything just builds up and this is just the icing on the cake now.
I’ve been asking my partner to swap his holiday week from a week in August to a week in September for 2-3 months. He’s only just “remembered” to sort it because he realised he’s been rotad to work the week in august that he’d originally asked to have as a holiday week… anyway he is now being told September has too many people off so it can be swapped anyway. I figured it’s his fault because he’s left it too late anyway so I’m annoyed at him for that. But his week off being different to what he requested has happened before so I asked to him to double check that all of his other holidays were correct. It was really important to us for him to have the week of our daughter’s first birthday off in November and low and behold he’s checked it and they’ve not given it to him. They’ve just given him a random week of in October instead.
Now I’m fuming he’s not checked this all out himself and that I have to nag him countless times but now he’s shouting at me telling me that none of this is his fault and that basically I don’t know what I’m talking about and none of it is so simple. I say it’s as simple as booking time off and either being told yes you can have it or no… but obviously what do I know?
Im so mad because a. He should sort this all out himself, I shouldn’t have had to keep on at him to check all this stuff like this mother b. Surely his work should tell him if he can’t have holidays he’s requested off and give him the option to pick different ones instead of just throwing them in anywhere. My blood is boiling!
You know when you just start feel like you’ve got another child and not a partner.
I’ve been asking my partner to swap his holiday week from a week in August to a week in September for 2-3 months. He’s only just “remembered” to sort it because he realised he’s been rotad to work the week in august that he’d originally asked to have as a holiday week… anyway he is now being told September has too many people off so it can be swapped anyway. I figured it’s his fault because he’s left it too late anyway so I’m annoyed at him for that. But his week off being different to what he requested has happened before so I asked to him to double check that all of his other holidays were correct. It was really important to us for him to have the week of our daughter’s first birthday off in November and low and behold he’s checked it and they’ve not given it to him. They’ve just given him a random week of in October instead.
Now I’m fuming he’s not checked this all out himself and that I have to nag him countless times but now he’s shouting at me telling me that none of this is his fault and that basically I don’t know what I’m talking about and none of it is so simple. I say it’s as simple as booking time off and either being told yes you can have it or no… but obviously what do I know?
Im so mad because a. He should sort this all out himself, I shouldn’t have had to keep on at him to check all this stuff like this mother b. Surely his work should tell him if he can’t have holidays he’s requested off and give him the option to pick different ones instead of just throwing them in anywhere. My blood is boiling!
You know when you just start feel like you’ve got another child and not a partner.
I'm possibly being a bit sensitive but I'm a bit upset that I've had no contact off any of my cousins or wider family since finding out my dad's got cancer. I know they know about it so it's not like they just aren't aware.
Both sides have experienced a parent with cancer and and during that time I contacted them to check in.
Surely it's not that hard to send a text saying 'I heard the news, you know where I am if you need me'.
Both sides have experienced a parent with cancer and and during that time I contacted them to check in.
Surely it's not that hard to send a text saying 'I heard the news, you know where I am if you need me'.
Im sorry to hear about your dad. Cancer is a scary time. In fact it was when my mum was diagnosed that I realised how useless family are and how it was friends always looking out for me. Ive never forgotten that.
Do you have anyone at all looking out for you? Xx
Hi everyone, hope you’re all ok. I am fed up of my selfish and lazy ‘partner’ if you can even call him that 
We have two children, 6 and 1 and we’ve been drifting ever since my youngest was born. He goes to the gym every single day bar Sunday, goes out to play football all day Saturday (leaves at 12 doesn’t get back till 8) and football practice all evening on a Thursday. He’s been acting more and more shifty lately, when we go to bed he hides his phone in the pillowcase and whenever he shows me something on his phone you can see him itching to get it back … so I’m pretty sure he’s cheating. He basically refuses to put our youngest to bed and bailed on me at the weekend after we’d made plans to go and see the lads at the pub. I’m 23, he’s 30 and I’m at my wits end and very ready to ask him to leave I work full time and have a demanding job and never get a break, to be a man, hey?!
We have two children, 6 and 1 and we’ve been drifting ever since my youngest was born. He goes to the gym every single day bar Sunday, goes out to play football all day Saturday (leaves at 12 doesn’t get back till 8) and football practice all evening on a Thursday. He’s been acting more and more shifty lately, when we go to bed he hides his phone in the pillowcase and whenever he shows me something on his phone you can see him itching to get it back … so I’m pretty sure he’s cheating. He basically refuses to put our youngest to bed and bailed on me at the weekend after we’d made plans to go and see the lads at the pub. I’m 23, he’s 30 and I’m at my wits end and very ready to ask him to leave I work full time and have a demanding job and never get a break, to be a man, hey?!
I'm so sorry to hear thisHi everyone, hope you’re all ok. I am fed up of my selfish and lazy ‘partner’ if you can even call him that
Have you outright confronted him and asked if he's cheating? Or asked why he's acting the way he is? It's selfish offering you no help when you're working as well as trying to be a Mum.I haven’t yet, I’m trying to be 100% sure as I don’t want to throw accusations around, however I’ve caught him on dating sites when I was pregnant with our youngest and stupidly stayed so it wouldn’t surprise me. He doesn’t see an issue with the way he’s acting and apparently he’s entitled to ‘me time’. I have no problem with him going out and doing his hobbies but the extent he does is a joke and the fact that he doesn’t help/never cooks/etc it’s just all a bit much!I'm so sorry to hear this
Tell him to get out. He’s a child in a mans body.
It sounds like a horrible situation, I'm so sorry
He needs to understand that yes, whilst he is entitled to "me time" it works both ways, and you are entitled to "me time" too. It shouldn't all be on you! You're entitled to help. I hope you manage to have a serious chat with him and get things worked out, whether that be by staying together and him compromising to help you out, or by going your separate ways xIm sorry you are going through this it sounds like it's making you feel lonely and miserable. You definitely need to talk to him asap otherwise nothing will change.
Not sure of this helps but I have a daughter and I often think 'what would I say to her if she was in my situation'.I think this can help you make decisions when you are in a bad place.
I completely agree. If I saw one of my friends in this situation I would tell them to leave so I think I need to take my own advice!
Yes I do fortunately. I'm very close to my brother and his wife and we are all pulling together to support my parents. My mum is finding it all very difficult to cope with. My husband has been great too.
I suppose it's daft to be upset about it but I always considered us all to be close. People have their own stuff going on though I guess.
No not daft at all. It sounds a cliche but you really do see people for who they are in times like this.
I never really bothered with my neighbours much before, but when I was going through this they really rallied around and even put my bins out for me, told me they were always here etc. The people I'm related to did nothing.
Im not sure if it helps but if your dad has a macmillan nurse then they usually have a direct number. I used to call my mum's when I didnt understand the treatment or needed reassurance etc, they are happy for relatives as well as the patients to call.
Eta: im glad you have people because you need support too whilst you're supporting your mum
Cider gives me terrible hangoversI got drunk for the first time in over a year last night. My tolerance is nonexistent now so just two ciders did me in. Still had a third.
I don’t know how I was ever okay with it. It was actually extremely scary.
Get rid of him.Hi everyone, hope you’re all ok. I am fed up of my selfish and lazy ‘partner’ if you can even call him that
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