Shoestring Renovation

[candyland_]

I think she probably floats in to post birth visits and back out with zero understanding, compassion or any fucks given in all honesty. It might sound an unfair opinion but that’s how I imagine her to be, the way she went through her miscarriage opened my eyes to her a little bit. She seemed clueless about how women were treated before it happened to her.

We’ve all had a midwife or medical appointment with tick box staff.

 

[wakametango 2.0]

I think she probably floats in to post birth visits and back out with zero understanding, compassion or any fucks given in all honesty. It might sound an unfair opinion but that’s how I imagine her to be, the way she went through her miscarriage opened my eyes to her a little bit. She seemed clueless about how women were treated before it happened to her.

We’ve all had a midwife or medical appointment with tick box staff.

Blows my mind she was genuinely clueless when her baby was so unsettled… does she not know the signs for reflux, Solent reflux, colic, tongue tie, wind etc.
how has she been able to offer sound advice to sleep deprived, vulnerable women in the past. Baffles me

 

[candyland_]

Blows my mind she was genuinely clueless when her baby was so unsettled… does she not know the signs for reflux, Solent reflux, colic, tongue tie, wind etc.
how has she been able to offer sound advice to sleep deprived, vulnerable women in the past. Baffles me

I think a lot of midwives say their care is mostly all about the women and they have very little care involved in the babies.
From my own experience mine just ticked a few boxes, asked if I had supplies and left.

I imagine it’s even worse now with covid and the lack of midwives.

 

[ejhanson]

I think a lot of midwives say their care is mostly all about the women and they have very little care involved in the babies.
From my own experience mine just ticked a few boxes, asked if I had supplies and left.

I imagine it’s even worse now with covid and the lack of midwives.

Exactly this, I have just had a baby (12 weeks ago) and it is very tick boxes with the midwives and they seem to want to discharge you asap. I would say issues with baby afterwards is more dealt with by the health visitors and they are the ones you would usually go to with issues so it doesn't surprise me she doesn't know much about babies

 

[Figgy Fig]

Exactly this, I have just had a baby (12 weeks ago) and it is very tick boxes with the midwives and they seem to want to discharge you asap. I would say issues with baby afterwards is more dealt with by the health visitors and they are the ones you would usually go to with issues so it doesn't surprise me she doesn't know much about babies

We had a baby during Covid and had issues with jaundice and weight loss so saw (different) midwives for quite a while but you’re right, they have a very narrow set of parameters and only care about those. When I asked a question about my baby one midwife said “that’s for the health visitor”, even when I asked the health visitor I was directed to a local charity.
I understand the NHS is strapped for cash and I’m not bashing them but I feel that she must’ve been really lacking in any sort of empathy when dealing with expectant and new mothers, particularly those who were suffering with physical and mental health conditions.

 

[Coffee-Addict]

All midwives rotate - so i dont believe for one second that she doesnt know about newborns and feeding routines .

 

[candyland_]

She will know the basics but she probably hasn’t spent a prolonged time with mums and their babies. Like she will know what cluster feeding is but probably never gave the reality of it a second thought until she did it herself.

 

[wakametango 2.0]

She will know the basics but she probably hasn’t spent a prolonged time with mums and their babies. Like she will know what cluster feeding is but probably never gave the reality of it a second thought until she did it herself.

Honestly I find it shocking. I’m 6m postpartum and midwives that visited helped me latch, discussed feeding, one even sent me to bed as I was feeding and pumping & getting no sleep, gave advice on alternative ways to feed my baby (cup and syringe) it’s like her actual job had nothing to do with babies. Weird.

 

[duggee_hug]

Honestly I find it shocking. I’m 6m postpartum and midwives that visited helped me latch, discussed feeding, one even sent me to bed as I was feeding and pumping & getting no sleep, gave advice on alternative ways to feed my baby (cup and syringe) it’s like her actual job had nothing to do with babies. Weird.

My midwives were fantastic too, maybe it’s just Romford midwives that give the bare minimum?

 

[Figgy Fig]

Honestly I find it shocking. I’m 6m postpartum and midwives that visited helped me latch, discussed feeding, one even sent me to bed as I was feeding and pumping & getting no sleep, gave advice on alternative ways to feed my baby (cup and syringe) it’s like her actual job had nothing to do with babies. Weird.

Wow, they sound like actual angels. I *wish* mine had been like yours!

 

[wakametango 2.0]

Wow, they sound like actual angels. I *wish* mine had been like yours!

I mean ignoring the fact my baby screamed non stop and no one diagnosed her with tongue tie and she wasn’t actually getting ANY milk from me and the advice was to give her to dad to stop crying … yeah they were okay

Sorry I am derailing the thread x

 

[Coffee-Addict]

I am so pleased she wasnt my midwife - my midwife was great with advice about what to do

 

[Sb123k]

I am so pleased she wasnt my midwife - my midwife was great with advice about what to do

I cannot believe she is a midwife, she seems to know nothing about babies! Surely she could pop him in his bouncer in the bathroom for 5 mins while she jumps in the shower. She must need to nip to the loo throughout the day so surely that’s the same thing?

 

[Eye_roll_central]

I don’t know what she thought it was going to be like with a newborn? Plus aren’t her parents next door? It’s like she’s really struggling with EVERYTHING for content? She has Terry who by the looks of it wants to be hands on, parents next door, she’s a midwife for gods sake! The whole breastfeeding thing pissed me off, if you aren’t happy/shattered/sore it’s no one else’s business if she switched to formula. She literally doesn’t even need to tell Instagram if she’s bothered about it, literally no one would bat an eyelid! Your baby. Your choice. She’s punishing herself as she isn’t enjoying it? Who will benefit from that? No one.

 

[candyland_]

Surely she could give him to Terry for five minutes before he leaves for work/ask her parents to come over for 10 minutes or hand him over to Terry once he’s home from work. In saying that what’s the first thing she does when her mum takes him for a walk or she gets a bath in peace? She comes onto Instagram.

I know all babies are different and some are more demanding than others but I can’t help but think she isn’t helping herself. She doesn’t want to breastfed so I can’t understand why she is forcing it and suffering. She said herself he settles with formula so give him it and you’ll both be happier.

My midwife drilled it into me that I had to feed my baby, change them and then put them down.

 

[LouLou10]

Literally she is really rubbing me up the wrong way recently! As a single parent with a 3 month who doesn’t have my parents next door or help from a parent…I still manage to brush my teeth and take a shower everyday! I just bring bubba in the bathroom with me! I’m shocked she is a midwife she really doesn’t have a clue!!

 

[candyland_]

She’s posting photos of him with no nappy on now. I’ll never understand why people take those photos never mind post them online.
What’s wrong with her?

 

[duggee_hug]

I am so pleased she wasnt my midwife - my midwife was great with advice about what to do

This isn’t a serious post from her surely? Does she think the baby will resent her for eternity if she popped him in a bouncer or moses basket for 5 mins whilst she has a shower and brushes her teeth? It’s not something to question surely? She has said previously he cries on her sometimes so what is the difference in a bouncer or moses basket? What would she tell new Mums to do? It’s like she’s blocked anything midwife/baby related from her brain.

 

[LouLou10]

So she’s got time to Instagram but ain’t got time to tit, shower or brush her teeth. Maybe put the phone down and use that 10 mins to take a shower instead of making sure you upload to Instagram

 

[candyland_]

I wonder if he has a dummy - it might settle him if he isn’t hungry.

This isn’t a serious post from her surely? Does she think the baby will resent her for eternity if she popped him in a bouncer or moses basket for 5 mins whilst she has a shower and brushes her teeth? It’s not something to question surely? She has said previously he cries on her sometimes so what is the difference in a bouncer or moses basket? What would she tell new Mums to do? It’s like she’s blocked anything midwife/baby related from her brain.

I can imagine her just smiling at them and leaving for her next appointment without giving it a real thought.