Ruby Granger #30 A warm milky mug of applestoodle tea

[hermionewannabe123]

Jade’s comment. I can’t. I just can’t.

Sure. It’s fabulous, Jade. You’re basically friends with a future winner of the Nobel prize for literature. How are they all so goddamn delirious?

I mean Jade's spent the past 3 years at a scam university where she's apparently gotten high marks for citing wikipedia in a paper, so maybe she's not the best judge of writing quality.

They're delirious because they've spent the past five years getting thousands of likes on their content. They ignore that there are thousands of students more intelligent and hardworking than them (see: students who get into Oxbridge/Ivies, have jobs while getting top grades, and/or actually produce publishable work), and that their success is only due to being among the first to think of recording it all.

 

[yerdasellsavon]

I mean Jade's spent the past 3 years at a scam university where she's apparently gotten high marks for citing wikipedia in a paper, so maybe she's not the best judge of writing quality.

They're delirious because they've spent the past five years getting thousands of likes on their content. They ignore that there are thousands of students more intelligent and hardworking than them (see: students who get into Oxbridge/Ivies, have jobs while getting top grades, and/or actually produce publishable work), and that their success is only due to being among the first to think of recording it all.

This is exactly it. Ruby less so because she actually did go to a proper university, but Jade goes to a scam university for rich kids with the sole purpose of making them feel "special" and boosting their ego.

All the Studytubers (bar Eve Bennett in fairness) have an air of superiority about them; they try to downplay it, but you can tell they think they're better than everyone else and more academically gifted. There's a reason you were all rejected from Oxford: you're not as good as you think you are.

Ruby did 14 hour study days for A-Levels and got A*AA. Not bad grades by any means, but if you're putting that level of work in and sacrificing everything else, you should be achieving better. That's why I wonder how she must feel having achieved her first and realising during graduation that 100s of other students also achieved that, while having an active social life outside of working.

They're all obsessed with looking like they're the smartest, but they don't work smartly. With her lack of life and social skills, Ruby is about as employable as a cardboard box.

 

[Deeznutslol]

All the Studytubers (bar Eve Bennett in fairness) have an air of superiority about them

Tbh I think that is one of the main reasons Ruby hangs out with kids, she likes the idea of being superior and having them look up to her.

 

[gossip_guy]

Jade’s comment. I can’t. I just can’t.

Sure. It’s fabulous, Jade. You’re basically friends with a future winner of the Nobel prize for literature. How are they all so goddamn delirious?

And that's exactly why Ruby posts nonsensical drivel in her Instagram echo chamber. She has no interest in improving as a writer, she's not going to share her writing somewhere where she'd risk getting actual critical feedback. She just wants blind praise and to be told that her writing is the profound work of genius that she thinks it is.

 

[hermionewannabe123]

Tbh I think that is one of the main reasons Ruby hangs out with kids, she likes the idea of being superior and having them look up to her.

And because if she hangs out with people her own age, it will quickly become clear that she isn't even average, she is below average in terms of intelligence, maturity, cleanliness, and work ethic, whereas kids buy into her youtube persona.

She's quickly becoming irrelevant considering she herself was a teenager from 2013-2019 (ish). Soon it will be near impossible for her to relate to the kids of 2022, 2025, 2030... what's the long term plan? what happens when years go by and no book/her book flops, the kids find studytubers more relevant to them, and the built-in influencer "frands" dry up? She'll be left with money and not much else.

 

[rubysdeadfly]

Daddy Bones looking fit here

keep ur hands off my mans

 

[Elekktra]

keep ur hands off my mans

i wonder what Ruby would think if she read tattle lol

 

[pineapplesandcheese]

As if the blouse isn't bad enough, the unlayered hair being tied back is making it look like she has a Victorian old lady bob. Getting a haircut is the least of Ruby's problems but I do actually think letting go of the long "princess hair" so many prepubescent girls are attached to would make a world of difference. So of course she'll never do it.

I feel personally called out by this maybe it's time for a haircut...

 

[figgypud]

I feel personally called out by this maybe it's time for a haircut...

I don't think it goes for everyone! Long hair is lovely, Ruby just evidently doesn't look after hers and I think she keeps it that way because that's how children have it. With layers or styling long hair =/= childish imo, but Ruby's is screaming for something, anything.

 

[pineapplesandcheese]

I don't think it goes for everyone! Long hair is lovely, Ruby just evidently doesn't look after hers and I think she keeps it that way because that's how children have it. With layers or styling long hair =/= childish imo, but Ruby's is screaming for something, anything.

Sadly I'm terrible at doing hairstyles so my hair just looks the same as Ruby's, however I like to think it looks ok because I dress normally and not like a Victorian ghost still miles better than the fringe and bob cut I had when I was 10

I'd love it if Ruby just decided 'duck it' one day and used the extortionate amount of money she has to go travelling around Europe or Asia or something. It would get her out of her bubble and give her more interesting content for youtube

 

[hermionewannabe123]

I mean she's already gone to Italy and look at the content that came out of that, forced "candid" shots of her bringing books everywhere including reading Emily Dickinson on Mt Vesuvius because ??? not to mention poor attempts at educating us about Italy and shock that other tourists exist (and aren't using their vacation to cosplay as bookworms)

 

[StatusWoe]

I like the prawns because they are the smallest ones, syo I only play with thyose.

This is very nitpicky, but something that bothers me is how she says 'Like always' to lead into the description of the prawns, uh, I mean the pawns. That's the nature of chess pieces - and most inanimate objects. They stay the same. Why wouldn't they be 'like always'? It's not like the weather. Speaking of the weather, what kind of meteorological chaos is occurring in the Rubysphere? Wind shuffles, tree ruffles, pavement scatters, leaf shatters, nothing matters. These clouds are unnerving too. They've been grey all day, but they're no longer white? They've never been white! Ruby just told us they've been grey all day. But they're not ordinary grey; they're the kind of grey that's purple. Purple isn't a kind of grey.

Ever since the 'cucumber fragments in coves' post, I've had a suspicion that Ruby's been influenced by some special garden mushrooms, and this piece of chess writing does nothing to change that.

 

[pineapplesandcheese]

I mean she's already gone to Italy and look at the content that came out of that, forced "candid" shots of her bringing books everywhere including reading Emily Dickinson on Mt Vesuvius because ??? not to mention poor attempts at educating us about Italy and shock that other tourists exist (and aren't using their vacation to cosplay as bookworms)

The reading on Vesuvius thing pissed me off irrationally. I went to Vesuvius earlier this month and it was incredible, why spend all that time and money getting there just to stick your head in a book

 

[StatusWoe]

The reading on Vesuvius thing pissed me off irrationally. I went to Vesuvius earlier this month and it was incredible, why spend all that time and money getting there just to stick your head in a book

This! Ruby's lucky to be able to visit such an incredible place. She can read back in the hotel or wherever.

 

[pineapplesandcheese]

This is very nitpicky, but something that bothers me is how she says 'Like always' to lead into the description of the prawns, uh, I mean the pawns. That's the nature of chess pieces - and most inanimate objects. They stay the same. Why wouldn't they be 'like always'? It's not like the weather. Speaking of the weather, what kind of meteorological chaos is occurring in the Rubysphere? Wind shuffles, tree ruffles, pavement scatters, leaf shatters, nothing matters. These clouds are unnerving too. They've been grey all day, but they're no longer white? They've never been white! Ruby just told us they've been grey all day. But they're not ordinary grey; they're the kind of grey that's purple. Purple isn't a kind of grey.

Ever since the 'cucumber fragments in coves' post, I've had a suspicion that Ruby's been influenced by some special garden mushrooms, and this piece of chess writing does nothing to change that.

The writing she shares on her instagram captions has very English language GCSE vibes, I don't think there's any shame in not being a good writer especially at her age, but it really does highlight how insanely privileged she is that she can take a year off to try and get published when her writing quality is on par with an average top set English high school class

 

[Griftwood]

The writing she shares on her instagram captions has very English language GCSE vibes, I don't think there's any shame in not being a good writer especially at her age, but it really does highlight how insanely privileged she is that she can take a year off to try and get published when her writing quality is on par with an average top set English high school class

This, omg. I took some time this morning to glance over some of the writing I produced in college and it was just so, so cringe - I can’t imagine where I’d be now if I’d 1) published that tit on social media, 2) commanded the kind of online following of teens that Roobee has, in whose eyes she can do no wrong, or 3) had enough parental funds to not have to figure out a job. I’d really like to be a fly on the wall/windowsill in Roobee’s room 10 years hence - is she ever going to take a look at this tit and realise she was never all that? More to the point, is she ever going to become a good writer when all she has is her echo chamber (fans and parents) who enable her?

 

[Mclindy]

I would love to be Ruby's dead fly on the windowsill and watch Ruby playing chess with her dad. It's clear that, just like the piano in one of her dusty hallways, that board is just for show: “direction seems meaningless when you're taking about a square”. What? Ruby clearly has never uttered the words checkmate in a single game of chess if she thinks the purpose is for the pieces to wander around the board cloud-bathing. I would JANUINELY love to see a time-lapse video of one of their games - from her writing it sounds absolutely hilarious.

Direction “depends on how you look at it”. You have to kill the king Ruby. Just focus on that direction! I know you don't like to get close to boys, but I promise you won't have to if you use something other than a pawn.

 

[vwxyz]

I mean she's already gone to Italy and look at the content that came out of that, forced "candid" shots of her bringing books everywhere including reading Emily Dickinson on Mt Vesuvius because ??? not to mention poor attempts at educating us about Italy and shock that other tourists exist (and aren't using their vacation to cosplay as bookworms)

I think if you really want to brag about reading on Vesuvius you should read some Italian classic actually

 

[pineapplesandcheese]

About the whole reading on Vesuvius thing, it also really irritated me that the comments were full of people saying 'omg this makes me want to go and read in italy'. A country that has tons of interesting things to see and do and you want to go there to read a book that you could literally read anywhere?

 

[gossip_guy]

I would love to be Ruby's dead fly on the windowsill and watch Ruby playing chess with her dad. It's clear that, just like the piano in one of her dusty hallways, that board is just for show: “direction seems meaningless when you're taking about a square”. What? Ruby clearly has never uttered the words checkmate in a single game of chess is she thinks the purpose is for the pieces to wander around the board cloud-bathing. I would JANUINELY love to see a time-lapse video of one of their games - from her writing it sounds absolutely hilarious.

It's quite simple really:

1. Castles can move in any direction on the board.
2. Pawns move in a tornado-like motion, swirling outward in an ever-expanding spiral. They can also move vertically.
3. Pawns cannot take other pawns, and merely get caught in each other's gravitational pull like they're stuck in some twirling chess waltz.
3. All the other pieces are merely decorative.
4. Ruby always wins.
5. Her daddy seems to be having some inhuman facial seizure during every game, his brow "shifting" and his face "flickering" like a faulty Ikea lamp.