Ruby Granger #19 Finished my porridge, eaten my peas; mummy, I'm homesick, take me home please

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The Instagram account for her Dickens project feels so extra and is basically a vanity exercise for her to go "look! we made this and people actually followed it!!" to impress her "teacher".
 
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The Instagram account for her Dickens project feels so extra and is basically a vanity exercise for her to go "look! we made this and people actually followed it!!" to impress her "teacher".
her professor will see right through it. they're great at sniffing out teachers' pets wannabes
 
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Just getting my gifted laptop out so I can keep track of this thread oh damn it I left it in my mouldy trunk
 
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The Instagram account for her Dickens project feels so extra and is basically a vanity exercise for her to go "look! we made this and people actually followed it!!" to impress her "teacher".
I’m the person who mentioned doing something similar to this in my MA for my Digital Humanities module, and I think that’s the difference I also did a 2nd year under grad module called “Dickens in Many Media” but that was more looking at illustration and models/statues made of the characters, for my Digital Humanities module where we made websites etc based on our chosen author or subject that was far more about the application of research to the programme we chose - and also partly showing us another way to use research etc beyond academia because it is literally impossible to get a job as an English Literature lecturer in a UK university in your specialism without having the funds and being willing to literally move to whatever city is hiring and that’s before you even look into the general pension cuts and general instability of lecturer’s jobs even after you get hired - and I can confirm that the reach numbers and actual hits never came anywhere near the marking for me at least because the content was marked alongside a writing task of summarising what we did, why we did it, what went well and what you would do differently to improve (you could mention reach and numbers for the last two but they had to be in conjunction with your content)
 
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Ah great thread title. I don't know whether to roll my eyes at Ruby or pity her
 
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Thanks to @Erebus for the thread title! Who wants to do a recap?
I mean I can try I guess

-Ruby shows and attachment to Blakeney that gets more and more concerning with time, and we are starting to wonder if she's keeping her captive
-She's been more at home than Uni and keeps talking about "normalizing homesickness" as if it were not something everybody finds normal already
-Her food combos have been getting weirder, peas in yogourt almost sound good now that we witnessed greated carrots in cereals
-She deleted a bunch of triggering posts on her food account and is obviously aware of the bad influence she has on young girls but still post pieces of toast and half cups of oats as "meals"
-Martha has been seemingly absent of family events, unsurprisingly
-We are patiently still waiting for the monetized dramatic video of her breaking down and saying she can't do Uni anymore because she's an introvert or something when really she probably doesn't have the brain capacity to function anymore
-She is now aware that she doesn't enjoy University but can't accept yet that it's because there's no Exeter in the first three Harry Potter books and that she is, like most of us, pretty ordinary, oh, life is so dull when people aren't paid thousands to put you on a pedestal for doing homework and taking a shower
-No signs of the plant, I think it would be fair to give up hope on this one
-Still struggling to find her dissertation subject

I'm not here that often, so feel free to had a bunch of stuff!
 
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I swear oatmeal is 95% of her diet at this point. I feel like she only eats something different when she's at restaurants.
 
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I swear oatmeal is 95% of her diet at this point. I feel like she only eats something different when she's at restaurants.
Wow that must be like, half a teaspoon of nut butter, why even butter to put it there at this point.
Oats are easy to make "sweet" and feel like "desert" if you want them to and have a great amount of fiber. I know I was really obsessed with fiber during my ed, I would get about 70g a day, wich is an insane amount, I repeat, insane, unless you want to tit your pants in public (luckily never happened to me) don't try it at home.
But yeah, that's a typical ed meal we got here, with the vegetables where they don't belong, the absence of any sweetener (I don't see agave on her bowl anyway), the tiny portion...
Goddam, yes matcha is good, like, I love plain green tea, but even I have trouble drinking/eating matcha stuff paired with little to no sugar. It's really bitter.

Edit: The second "butter" is a typo, but I think it's very poetic, so I'm gonna leave it there.
 
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I mean I can try I guess

-Ruby shows and attachment to Blakeney that gets more and more concerning with time, and we are starting to wonder if she's keeping her captive
-She's been more at home than Uni and keeps talking about "normalizing homesickness" as if it were not something everybody finds normal already
-Her food combos have been getting weirder, peas in yogourt almost sound good now that we witnessed greated carrots in cereals
-She deleted a bunch of triggering posts on her food account and is obviously aware of the bad influence she has on young girls but still post pieces of toast and half cups of oats as "meals"
-Martha has been seemingly absent of family events, unsurprisingly
-We are patiently still waiting for the monetized dramatic video of her breaking down and saying she can't do Uni anymore because she's an introvert or something when really she probably doesn't have the brain capacity to function anymore
-She is now aware that she doesn't enjoy University but can't accept yet that it's because there's no Exeter in the first three Harry Potter books and that she is, like most of us, pretty ordinary, oh, life is so dull when people aren't paid thousands to put you on a pedestal for doing homework and taking a shower
-No signs of the plant, I think it would be fair to give up hope on this one
-Still struggling to find her dissertation subject

I'm not here that often, so feel free to had a bunch of stuff!
Let's not forget poor Frederick is probably shoved in a mouldy trunk along with the sponsored laptop that will probably get posted by mommy when she needs to film a add
 
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I know she’s smaller height wise but half a cup….. bleeping hell!
 
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Ruby's back! After several months, Ol' Rubert has finally graced us with 16 more minutes of low-effort, recycled cringe.

Group Project Study With Me (this was fun)

And we can tell how enthusiastic she is by the lowercase, punctuation-free "(this was fun)" in the title. Rubes continues to show zero consistency in her punctuation and capitalisation, but in her defence, it's not like she's in her third year of an English degree or anything. ...Wait, what? She is? Oh. Well, that's embarrassing.

We can tell she's definitely excited though, by the very convincing, not-at-all-miserable 'thumbs-up' she gives in the thumbnail, where she looks like she's just been told that her dog died, shortly after Blakeney moved to New Zealand and the police arrested her father for tax evasion:

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"Hello, it's Roobee, and today oiy'm gyowing tyoo bee sharing with yoo a particularly fun 'study with me' video", she says. I think we'll be the judge of that, Rubes...

It was filmed "over half term", because Ruby's still living her life by the primary school metric she used when she was 9. So far Ruby has claimed reading week is anything from "a holiday" to "half term" - anything to avoid the reality that she's actually in her final year of uni and about to be shat out into the real, adult world after graduation.

She's been working on a "group projACKT!", which seems to be like a group project, but hangrier and with more privilege.

Ruby starts by showing the comforts of home, where she's fled yet again, and his living her best life: Dressed for a Siberian winter and huddling around her sad porridge for warmth.

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Ruby's working on a group project in which the world's unluckiest students are subjected to Ruby's Paris Geller-esque study regimes while they attempt to make Charles Dickens more accessible to the wider public and show why his writing is still relevant today. Ruby and her slaves study group decided on a Dickens-themed escape room, which accomplishes neither task.

Rubes claims that they did "a load of research" for this, including a load of market research. Unfortunately we've already been spoiled on the ending of this particular fiction (no thought, effort or research was done for this project and Ruby doesn't seem to know what an escape room actually is), and the end result of this project can be seen here:


But Ruby's clearly dipping into non-linear storytelling and we're getting the beginning after the end - she's the StudyTube Tarantino, only with zero talent and even more manic tirades about nothing.

Ruby has only just begun her project, but is already getting distracted by food fetish videos yet again:

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Videos about eating and/or eating disorders are the only YouTube content she watches now.

She's also taped a random New Yorker clipping onto her laptop as a makeshift camera cover, which seems redundant as the thick film of disgusting dirt and grime that befouls her laptop would certainly obscure any view through said camera. But hey, aesthetics above all!

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Ruby is a massive "reponent" of making studying fun. I mean, Ruby enjoyed every moment of her studies, and it very clearly helped her to learn words and their meanings! Be sure to make the classroom fun, so that kids can grow up enlaytonned and intellactually resplended!

Ruby claims she/her underlings made a fully-functioning escape room with clues and teachable experiences, which she proves by showing...

Some Emily Dickinson and Walt Whitman quotes taped next to a Nutcracker doll and a picture of Ruby:

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A sticker of No-Face from My Neighbour Totoro placed on a filthy, grime-covered window:

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A 'Final Year' binder with a Van Gogh painting on (a grim portent of things to come, as this might be your final year if you don't escape Ruby's room of dust and death). Also, a teacup, a candle, and a view of the many vans that you could presumably win for escaping successfully:

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And a random selection of books borrowed from several friends, relatives and libraries which Ruby claimed as her own. Also pictured are several random flowers and liquids from which you'll need to craft the antidote to the poison that Ruby gave you upon entering the room...

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So, apparently the key to making Dickens fun and relevant today is to simply focus on many other unrelated writers, artists and intellectual properties from many eras of history, and assemble the escape room in your own bedroom to give a convenient excuse to run home from uni.

Ruby is as satisfied with the effort as she is with the work she puts into all her creative endeavours:

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Ruby says she's making good headway and has spend around two hours on the project, so that past-tense "we designed and made the escape room!" talk was premature and all the stuff she showed was an irrelevant, shoehorned bunch of room tour footage to pad the video. That or she's continuing the non-linear narrative - with Ruby it's impossible to tell.

Ruby needs to get cracking, though - she's got a meeting in seven minutes precisely to discuss an "ASS-ay", which is presumably just what her tutors have collectively agreed to call Ruby's essays based on their overall quality.

Ruby shows a glimpse of one of her numerous, redundant planner systems, in which she reveals that she needs to remind herself when Halloween is (despite being obsessed with October) and celebrates Christmas with Blakeney in some fashion on November 2nd:

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She also notes tutor meetings under just their first names, because Ruby always wants to feel like her teachers are her friends and equals. "Chloe Meeting" is filed under "University", but "Lauren Meeting" is filed under "Meeting". Is this some meeting Inception? A meeting to discuss the Lauren Meeting? Or is Ruby just a moron? Probably the latter.

Ruby says for any meeting she has, she always adds some notes on Notion beforehand for discussion topics. Only in this case, she says she didn't add anything, which she claims is unusual for her.

"As I say, I just made some quick notes of questions and things I wanted to bring up," Ruby says, immediately contradicting herself. Which is it, Ruby? Either you didn't make any notes this time, or you did.

Then we're shown Ruby's "quick notes", which comprised of several pages and very obviously weren't written in 7 minutes, and it becomes clear that Ruby's been lying yet again to make herself seem far more organised, but just forgot to keep her story straight.

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(Pictured: Page 2 of Ruby's "quick notes")

Again we see the crux of Ruby's essay-writing technique - bombard a tutor with an absolute barrage of leading questions to get them to answer the essay question and write the skeleton of her essay for her. Combine that with Sparknotes and lots of secondary, supporting quotes, and voila!

Ruby quickly breaches the uni data protection and confidentiality rules by displaying email correspondence on-screen for the public to see. Ruby reveals that, after taking up her tutor's time with a meeting, she immediately started harassing her with follow-up emails:

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Her tutor's office hours are limited, and Ruby has clearly monopolised all of that time this day. Good luck, other students!

Ruby types up her tutor's notes into Notion, which seems to take forever, then it's back to the group projACKT!

Ruby claims to be putting serious research into this escape room, and rambles incoherently about Thomas Carlyle to prove it.

Meanwhile, we see that her actual research is just watching interviews with Jim Carrey from the press tour for his adaptation of A Christmas Carol:

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It's a fluffy interview with no academic merit and no real relevance to the task at hand, so naturally Ruby shoehorned it in.

And if we follow that pattern, we can surmise what the supporting material for her next Dickens essay is sure to be:



Ruby claims that Dickens is relevant today because workaholism culture was prevalent in both eras, never once mentioning that she herself is a massive "reponant" of toxic productivity and working yourself to death. In fact, she reads quotes about the drudgery of toxic labour in the time of Dickens with such fake whimsy and wistfulness in her voice that it's hard not to get the distinct impression that she believes borderline slave labour is a wonderful thing.

She also claims that as a culture, the first question that we ask people isn't "What's your name?" or "How are you?", but "What do you do?! What is your job?!", proving that Ruby's completely insane, entirely detached from reality and has never had an actual conversation in her life.

We're shown Ruby's Spotify, which includes such odd playlists as "Royalcore" and "regency vibes", because it's important that we romanticise the monarchy and its history of colonialism, shielding sex offenders from justice and leeching off the taxpayer.

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Playlists also featured: "you're a student in a posh boarding school" and "emily dickinson would find these poetic" (a playlist containing 60% Taylor Swift and Lana Del Rey).

Ruby lifts her candle snuffer to reveal a dead fly hidden under it like the world's worst magic trick:

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Ruby goes for an extended walk in a depressing, barren field littered with the remains of rotting pumpkins. Ruby says it's so "autominal" and she "literally" loves October so, so much.

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You might be wondering what this has to do with her study group project, and Ruby will take that particular secret to her pumpkin-covered grave.

Ruby gets set up in one of the many barely-used rooms in her house of squalor as multiple flies try desperately to escape through the closed window. Even flies have limits when it comes to filth.

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(Not pictured: The LG Gram Laptop)

She explains that each member of her group recorded an intro video explaining why they chose an escape room for their project. She doesn't actually show these videos or actually explain how an escape room is in any way relevant to Charles Dickens, nor does she explain why any of her group agreed to let Ruby edit the whole thing despite her consistent proven lack of ability and effort when it comes to editing.

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"Why would you trust me with this?" Ruby probably asks. "I edit my videos with a hammer!"

She rambles about how videos are a fantastic way to convey information in a compact, entertaining way, which begs the question why she didn't chose a YouTube feature, TikTok videos or a fake Netflix show as her means of making Dickens relevant to younger audiences instead of an escape room, which has no relevance and which Ruby clearly doesn't understand.

Ruby quickly mentions that she went with her family for her grandmother's birthday, which they evidently celebrated by watching films meant for small children and refusing to sit in chairs:

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It's the next day, and Ruby continues her projACKT! by making a slide about Victorian print cultures. Because that's what everyone wants to be reading about on a fun evening at an escape room. For this single slide, she writes absolute bleeping essay of information for some reason:

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Rubes, you do realise that escape rooms are a timed experience, right? People don't have four hours to read through your inane, poorly-researched, historically inaccurate bullshit.

She photographs her parents' mouldy Dickens books, which she claimed as her own, because a crumbling old book surrounded by dead flies is emblematic of both the Dickensian era and Ruby's future prospects.

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Ruby says that print culture was just too difficult to explain, so she just records a train announcer-style voiceover of herself shouting, "This next room will introduce visitors to the letterpress". Because Ruby appears to have confused escape rooms with museums.

The entire group project so far seems like an inconsistent, incoherent disaster that Ruby's taken the reins on and steered into a canyon after setting it ablaze. While we've already seen the shoddy end result and shouldn't be surprised, the lack of thought and sense from her regarding the project is still staggering.

Ruby inserts some footage of her short trip to London, which has nothing at all to do with her project, but she just needs to remind us yet again that she left the house without mummy holding her hand.

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Ruby rambles endlessly about the benefits of "pour-age", which seems indistinguishable from porridge. Ruby, are you sponsored by porridge? If not, stop talking about porridge so much. Other foods exist, you should try some.

Rubes casually informs us that she's spent hours researching Victorian doorbells, which should've been a red flag to her group partners to seize back control of this projACKT! before Ruby completely tanks all their grades.

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Ruby then talks about all the work she's been putting into a fake Instagram page as part of a marketing exercise for the escape room. Again, we've already seen the end result of this, but it's unfathomably lazy and was clearly just a way to weaponize her privilege and steer all her fans to follow the page to try to paint her marketing exercise as a success. It did not succeed based on its own merits and nobody would've followed it if it weren't for Studytube pseudo-celebrity Ruby Granger asking thousands of fans to follow it.

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After attempting to turn her escape room idea into means of teaching people to use a "printing prass", Ruby gets bored of her disastrous trainwreck of a project and twirls outside like a lunatic, while wearing jeans (two weeks after claiming she hates jeans and never wears them) and subjecting us to the same "Smile, Smile, Smile..." song we've heard in every single video from her.

Ruby acts likes she put tonnes of effort and work into the escape room logo by showing timelapses footage of its creation, but the end result was clearly no more than two minutes of half-assed photoshopping.

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In another of Ruby's ongoing attempts to burn down her house, she tries to snuff out a candle that's both broken and too big for the holder and the whole thing collapses:

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Ruby's so #grateful that so many people followed her fake escape room Insta page, clearly not realising that this is the most transparent, unfair means of gaining an advantage over other students without a substantial social media following.

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She desperately begs for praise for only running home for a week or so this time. Aren't you proud?!

Ruby rants about how bad "charll povertee" is, while displaying logos of child poverty causes. Ruby naturally only pays lips service to this cause and will not donate any money, food, time or action towards helping the cause or feeding the needy, but if any of these causes want to sponsor her, she'll happily take all their money.

After all that, the videos she kept talking about making were uploaded as unlisted ones to share with her group, there was no sign of any group interaction in this group study vide, and despite claiming to have designed a fully-functioning escape room, nothing is shown but flimsy, low-effort marketing and irrelevant research.

So, all in all, another incompetent, time-wasting tit-show of "tell, don't show" from Rubert.
 
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Ruby inserts some footage of her short trip to London, which has nothing at all to do with her project, but she just needs to remind us yet again that she left the house without mummy holding her hand.
And her calendar entry shows that she wasn't completely alone when she was in London as she was 'shopping with' someone for at least part of her trip.
 
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The moment the candle toppled over was my favourite. How is she so inept at candle safety? Roobee, with tapers, if they’re too big for the candlestick, you shave them down at the base. If they’re too small, you melt some wax and drip it on the bottom of the candlestick and then stick the taper in. If they’re broken, you toss them.

Notice also she’s ditched the white cloth she’d draped over her uni desk last year (the excuse being that she can only study on a white surface). Something must have got singed for her to finally realise how unsafe it was, especially paired with the candle in the too-big candlestick at a 45 degree angle.
 
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That title literally made me lose it lol. Like she's not even going to use an exclamation point or something? It sounds like she has to remind herself how she is supposed to feel about the project.
 
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And her calendar entry shows that she wasn't completely alone when she was in London as she was 'shopping with' someone for at least part of her trip.
You know I've read the "alone in London" part and I was like wow, she's going without an adult that unsafe.
She is an adult
We're the same age
I forgot she's an adult
 
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