Roadside Mum #5 oppressed to the point of starvation

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FlashBoof

Well she HAS achieved a bigger reach than usual with her fantasy.

Brilliant! All the more people to think “Hang on - didn’t I chip in for a book to her?” when she pops up in timelines. Come on people - when are you going to start asking where the Unbound scam project One in Five is?
 
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Witchfinder Sargeant

FlashBoof said:
Come on people - when are you going to start asking where the Unbound scam project One in Five is?
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Well, I like to think that my angry email to Unbound just before Christmas, pointing out that it was unfair on the contributors to keep them waiting for payment and that the book was in grave danger of being out of date before it was published played a part in the book effectively being taken off her and given to a professional editor.
 
Reactions: 10

TheDragonWithAFlagon


Ah yes, the Munchie Entrance, then. Also has a version called the Give Me Codeine Entrance and one known as I've Got A PIP Tribunal Coming Up And My GP Won't Have Anything To Do With This Shit Anymore Entrant. Unfortunate side order of This Is How I Stop My Child From Ever Leaving Me.

After the Munchie Entrance, we often have the Schrodinger's Asphyxiation. In this, the person is simultaneously about to expire when aware of being observed and in no danger whatsoever when nobody is known to be looking. I've stood outside a medical room door with a member of SLT and shown them how a cough comparable to the final days of consumption spontaneously resolves when there isn't a staff member to observe it - and then returns with a vengeance the instant the unfortunate, frail little bird (frequently nearly a foot taller and as heavy as the staff members) is aware of somebody within range.


How terribly and boringly predictable. And horrible for the kid to be dragged into this yet again.
 
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FlashBoof

She has missed off a mum that isn’t a self centred attention seeking weirdo, and a formal, well rounded education that means she will potentially escape history repeating itself the first time a boy shows interest her at 15. Instead of legalised slavery under the guise of “young carer” and History 101 using pop song references.
 

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usefullyuseless

Can she not do something nice for the child without broadcasting it online? Oh wait, she wants her gullible followers to pay for it.
 
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FlashBoof

I absolutely love the super toned down RSM that appears immediately after she gets some traction and new faces/followers. Pretending she is in the Waltons for a few days until the next oblique beg “oh my god - we can’t afford meat anymore” or “how will I ever get to the Mary Rose museum with my little History Boffin in my crummy mould car and broken electric wheelchair”

She is definitely my favourite RSM - because it lasts about three days before Logan Roy RSM appears like a dragon - gunning for the poor saps on corporate Social Media duty.
 

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Monochrome Muse

How do croissants, coffee, OJ, and scrambled eggs with bacon appear for her post bender brunch, yet they're having veg peel soup for tea cos unfairly poor?
 
Reactions: 14

kachoochoo

Griftymcgriftface said:
Bex did say she was having visitors round and someone speculated RSM then this story happens. They are fucking obsessed with being talked about!
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it's v funny to imagine it tho. the crossover we always dreamed of

*marcus bentley v/o*

day 2 in bex's massive house with log cabin, soon to be vacated

In the living room, Kiddo has had a meltdown due to Naughtiest taking their switch

Kiddo is about to lose 8 kallax squares

In the kitchen, Littlest One is preparing breakfast for the entire house

Plant boy has entered the house, with a ball gag, a butt plug from a charity shop and a small cactus

LO and NO's dad has entered the house, with idk, a wheelchair and some stewing steak. it seems a lot of rsm's tweets involve wheelchairs and cheap meat

It's 3.30pm.

louisa and bex are in the bedroom. they are sound asleep

louisa jerks awake and demands to be taken to a location where she can have a pop at low paid proles

there is a knock on the door. Littlest One, being the most sensible person here, answers it

it's jack. with content and SB
 
Reactions: 23

HotesTilaire

You had me going until the last line, Katch!
 
Reactions: 6

Griftymcgriftface

Howling at this! I don’t want to know where Plant Boy and Roadside dad are by the end of this!
 
Reactions: 6

CabalofBolorneaise

Then RSM and Bex fall out because N is asking for a switch and RSM posts a 25 tweet thread saying how unfair it is that other children wave their possessions in front of N and LO when she can’t afford a switch, shortly followed by a quick by the way here’s my cash app and N’s favourite game was Super Smash Sisters Bros
 
Reactions: 4
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