Questions for those who have been through menopause

[Pixie06]

What age was everyone when they finished? I'm really struggling with my teenager, who won't go to school, is so lazy, rude to me - her friends even tell her not to speak to me the way she does. The other day she was going out of the house with her nipples hanging out of her top, which is a bralette. I told her to put on another top. She told me to F off at which point I lost it, grabbed her back, she was out the door and pushed her up the stairs. She went into school (she'd refused to go in earlier) and they took her to A and E as she had complained of dizziness and the police were with her. I don't know wether my losing it is menopause, or just me being totally drained by her, or if I'm unstable. She's staying with a friend now. I feel so low.

 

[House of Tea]

Not a question, a statement of fact.

Bastard chin hairs. I have been walking around with two very long ones for God knows how long just under my chin. Just didn’t see them until just now. Mortifying. An inch and a half long each.

🧔‍♀️

 

[House of Tea]

I also can’t concentrate anymore . I love reading but I can’t cope with anymore than 15-20 mins at any one time . It is extremely frustrating.

Do you spend a lot of time online as well? I find that my concentration has been ruined for reading which I love, because online scrolling has mucked up my attention span.

 

[Jwren]

Research is now showing that going on HRT before your estrogen receptors shut down can significantly reduce your risk of dementia and Parkinsons aswell as other conditions predominately suffered by women so not sure they have anything to be smug about. I think the benefits of taking HRT outweigh the risks considerably

Interesting as I was told by a senior BC specialist as I had breast cysts to avoid HRT if possible (low dose vaginal estrogen doesn’t come with same risks) thankfully I’ve found other things that have made a difference.
Also it’s not discussed enough whilst on HRT if you drink you should limit alcohol as it increases your risk further of BC, as it ups estradiol levels. One of my friends who enjoys a drink mostly at weekends wasn’t aware of this, they kept upping her HRT as it wasn’t working for her and the following year she was diagnosed with BC, thankfully caught early and doing well after chemo.
Also HRT depletes certain nutrients as does OC so it’s important to make sure you replace those nutrients.

The smugness from not taking HRT comes from the same place as the smugness from having a natural childbirth. Not sure why these women want to put themselves on a pedestal, there's no prizes given out.

I‘ve no smugness from not taking HRT but some of us need to be more cautious. I’ve had plenty of symptoms and it would have been easier to go on HRT but personally I’m glad I didn’t, as I would never have known I could improve things without it.
My mother was on HRT patches for around 15 years + and when she came off she went through all the symptoms of the menopause again.

I would say read as much reputable and scientific evidence as you can on the menopause and HRT before you make your decision because at the end of the day it’s your life/body that‘s going through it.

I agree, the benefits of HRT aren’t really discussed. It’s also proven to prevent/lessen a lot of bladder issues such as urgency and UTIs but they never say about that either

Lots of women on HRT still have to take vaginal oestrogen to improve those issues. You don’t have to take HRT to improve those problems and a low vaginal oestrogen cream/gel etc comes with less risk but it all comes down to the individual, their concerns and risks.

 

[Cupcakemum]

Yes B6 is also good for mood, balancing hormones and PMS.
Don‘t remind me about meno brain fog I can’t tell you the amount of times I forgot names of people I knew well and then desperately tried to remember their name to the point I missed what they were talking to me about Thankfully that has improved



_________________________________________________________________


The joys of menopause, some women won’t have any symptoms, some just a few and others have had our fair share.
I’d forgotten about the electric shock feeling and burning tongue.
I thought it worth posting as sometimes it can be reassuring to women to know you’re not alone with what you are going through, nor have you lost your marbles (which is how it can feel sometimes) wondering what’s happening to you.

The brain fog can be really scary can't it. I have people finishing my sentences and finding my words constantly.
I've been driving and forgotten where I'm going and I also forgot my postcode. That really scared me as I've lived here for over 20yrs!!
I've worked with people with with dementia and memory problems for years and I did have a panic that I was going that way for a while, but then found out a bit more about peri and felt slightly reassured.

I've spoken to work and my family and thankfully they've been supportive, so you're right that speaking about these symptoms are hugely helpful.
It's really affected my confidence as I've had moments of feeling like I'm going mad!

 

[ginger tea]

If only you could get a pause from the man. Twerp. Putting himself into the centre of things.

I feel that since iv been peri menopause I’m more aware/alert and see how people really are and can see through their fakeness and bullshit. Or is it just an age thing?? Does anyone else feel this ??

 

[Jwren]

I had a hysterectomy and as I’m still young I have a high dose HRT but Louise newson has some amazing podcasts full of info! I’ve found a lot of GPS are useless with knowing about hrt and hormones unless you fit into the category of just needing the standard normal levels of hrt and they can send you away with patches or tablets. I ended up paying private to speak to a hormone specialist who has been amazing testing my hormones and prescribing things to help!

As you’ve had a hysterectomy at a young age it makes sense to take HRT.
Dr Newson also has financial relationships with pharmaceutical companies and although I agree she has some good advice, it’s predominantly pro HRT, which some women can’t or don’t wish to take.
As I’ve said before the misery of the menopause for many women, is a big money maker for pharmaceutical companies, influencers and even the likes of Dr Newson who you have to pay to see privately, many women can’t afford to nor should they have to.

 

[Tea and Toast]

Makes me sick hearing "super heros" brag that they did the menopause with no help

 

[House of Tea]

Im 45 and never gave menopause a second thought. I just thought ill deal with it as and when etc. Now all these celebrities are banging on about it its starting to make me anxious. Its annoying!!! Also i cant help but think these middldaged women are just using this topic as a way of staying relevant.

The menopause, just like periods, are different for every woman. I know people who have gone through it with minimal effects, others were floored. I find it quite irritating that lots of celebs have jumped on a bandwagon, but at least the menopause Is being talked about now in an open way. GPs get minimal time on learning about menopause, there is a large degree of self help going on, so if people are struggling, at least they have got the conversation going in a open way. Hopefully your experience as a middle aged woman yourself, will be smooth sailing and you don’t annoy people by bringing it up. It does tend to play on your mind a bit if you are suffering.

 

[SoF]

MP is defined as 12 months since your last period. Reality is peri menopause can start early -mid 40’s. As much as 10 y b4. I wish I knew then what I know now! Low mood .. mood swings .. brain fog .. unexplained anger over trivial things .. weight gain ..very difficult to lose even if ur doing all the “right” things. Basically it’s awful. Never got prof hdlp/hrt. Wish now I had .

 

[1001 others]

Hey, at least we're not alone!

It's just awful, isn't it? I have heard that once you get over menopause, you're in for a life once again of rainbows and unicorns and elated feelings ... so there is that to look forward to.

I do appreciate there are risks with HRT (like anything), but at this point I'd take the risk over feeling so dreadful.

 

[Libbylulu]

Just thought I’d share that for the last week I’ve been taking the supplement Maca for hormone imbalance. I’d read that it’s good for estrogen dominance and dumps any estrogen you don’t need but metabolises what you do need. I’m post menopause but have just not found a proper balance. I’m better than I was but was bloated and my breasts were incredibly sore and big. In one week I’ve lost 2 lbs - I know it’s not much but it’s a start and it’s without really trying- and my breast soreness has gone. I have more energy and my sleep is better. So far so good. I still take my HRT as prescribed. Hope this helps as I know how dibilitating the menopause is and every little tip and trick helps

 

[Blowup80]

Hi everyone. I'm 41 and started Peri menopause at 37. Periods stopped so did pregnancy tests, negative. Flushes started at night and felt lethargic. Year later my periods which had only gone for a few month became horrendous, really heavy, awful pains around my vagina then passing clots. Then anxiety hit me from nowhere, panic attacks everyday, with really bad hot flushes. Had to take time off work. I had bloods done and it was confirmed as early menopause. I also went psycho! Never had mood swings like it! Thought I would kill my partner a few times bless him. Now I'm few years in. I have the coil fitted and use an oestrogen gel twice a day, I also had to take a low dose of anti depression meds to help with the anxiety. I'm trying to get off these now by using Magnesium tablets. I have bigger boobs too, they just came from nowhere. I don't have flushes that bad now but I don't sleep very well. Some nights I'm wide awake till 3am. I find eating well and exercise helps my mood. Sorry for the long post! There first couple of years were definitely the worst!

 

[House of Tea]

Yes I have had memory problems. On a Monday I have been asked what I did on the weekend and I can only remember one day of the weekend. My long term memory is wonderful. Very embarrassing. The thing with meno for me - symptoms come in waves. My worse symptom is anxiety. Never an anxious person before, now riddled with it. I am looking into CBD Oil.

 

[☆MagicRoundabout☆]

Hey lovelies
I usually hang out on the Hinch thread but wanted to find others who are going through this perimenopausal crap.

I am 50 but have struggled for around 5 years with hot flushes, horrible mood swings, random blubbing sessions, heavy bleeding (to the point i needed a spare change of clothing if I left home) and itchy skin.

The last straw was a very public meltdown and uncharacteristic rant at some random rude little man. I saw red mist and just verbally let rip!
I saw a lovely Gynaecology consultant mid September and prescribed Combined continual HRT - Oestrogel (rub onto inner thighs, one pump each side a day and Provera 10mg (progesterone) tablets until I get a Mirena IUD fitted.

I was undergoing diagnostics for suspected blood cancer for 4 months over the summer, which, thankfully turned out negative but they found Ovarian cysts and Adenomyosis on the CT & internal ultrasound.

So far, no bleeding, so a relief in itself, side effects, boobs ache and seem to have expanded! The only thing I really want rid of is the skin crawling sensation. Hopefully the Oestrogel will help In time.
Due another Ultrasound next few weeks.

I hope everyone here gets any help they need. It's taken years for me - fobbed off by my GP & put on Sertraline which achieved diddly squat.
It's a really hard and confusing time in a woman's life. Thankfully it is being addressed much more nowadays. Xx

 

[Notworthy]

Hey yeah I’m starting to form a pattern, iv been writing everything down, iv noticed that when I get certain symptoms my insomnia kicks in iv been getting really itchy ears and skin and my new symptom is my hair is starting to thin

It really is bizarre how many weird things happen. I wish I had paid more attention to my body when I was younger.

Yes, and yes! Spirulina powder stirred into a smoothie made with bananas, chocolate-flavoured collagen powder and lactose-free milk has changed my life. Without word of a lie! I've always loved spirulina and thought I'd give the collagen a try after looking and feeling so, so exhausted for so long. I still have my usual morning coffee but could probably go without it as my energy levels have been great. I'm two weeks in and very happy with the results. I'm not as hungry as usual either, which is a huge plus. I make mine in the morning and sip slowly on it throughout the day - I don't even need lunch as I'm not hungry.

A friend just got some collagen, I've been considering it myself as my hands have literally aged 10 years over the winter but if it's helping with other symptoms I'll definitely give it a go now. Thanks

 

[ginger tea]

Would like to thank you all for your support and sharing your experience’s, this thread has really helped me so much

 

[Percypig]

I went through the menopause young (early 30s) and didn’t realise as it was straight after I had a baby - I thought I had post natal anxiety as I felt like I was going crazy!
I take the pill instead of HRT - it has stopped the hot flushes and aches and pains. Now how to tackle the weight gain I still struggle with mood swings and getting really angry quickly, I hate it.

Hey just want to say thank you for starting this thread, my mum keeps telling me she thinks I’m menopausal Iv been to the doctors several times explaining how I’m feeling.
1, no energy
2, can’t wait to get to bed but can’t get up in the morning either
3, weight gain ( especially round tummy )
4, feel like a teen again with PMT periods heavier
5, brain fog.
All my adult life Iv been very active I run 4-5 times a week I do fitness classes I try my best to eat right but also have a little treat here and there, but the last year or two there have been times I physically can’t motivate myself to do anything Iv spent like almost three weeks at a time where I don’t move from home except to go to work and that’s a struggle, I get quite emotional for absolute no reason, it’s like a wave just comes over me.
But the doctor takes my blood and tells me I’m an anemic which I have been all my life and I know exactly what that feels like, but this is more intense.
Does anyone feel like this to?

yes the brain fog and low energy were definitely symptoms for me, and the weight gain on the tummy. I used to be really fit and have a flat toned tummy and now I’m 4 stone overweight and look 5 months pregnant

 

[Ruby’s mum]

I didn’t suffer greatly from PMT and can’t say I noticed much difference.
HRT was a godsend. I had horrendous night sweats, waking every hour wet through, sweat literally running off my body. I would throw the covers off, strip nightie off then wake half an hour later freezing cold. Frequent daytime hot flushes too. Within a couple of days of taking HRT it had calmed right down so I could actually sleep at night.
I’ve never had phantom PMT. I am very forgetful though, terrible memory and repeat myself all the time as my kids love to point out!

 

[ginger tea]

Just read this, thought it may be of interest here. Sorry I couldn't work out how to do a warning thing, so hope I don't trigger anyone!

Kathy Burke: ‘I’m so glad I didn’t kill myself during menopause’

A long period of ill health badly affected her state of mind

www.theguardian.com

How peri/menopause effects your mental health and mind set is the most shocking for me, I honestly never thought that would be a factor and probably one of the main ones for me personally