New thread title thanks to @Cheerios78 
fizzy cat's piss and £1000 worth of Costa vouchers are on their way!
Last thread recap:
- Beggy Mitchell is, as always, a greedy, braggy bleep
- she doesn't work either full or part time, and can't be arsed to parent her kids and step kids.
- we're still in Jubai, and Rancid actually went out in public in the camel toe jumpsuit, which she teamed with her ugly Gucci espadrilles (a snip at only £535). Looking lush as always, babe! She did manage to put nipple covers on though, because having your labia visible is fine, but absolutely not the nips!
- back in Torbaydos, PA Jo's job description has been stretched to include "putting up the boss' Christmas tree". Most people with kids like to put the decs up as a family, but not Rabies, "mama to loads of kids". 13 year old Lula was tasked with getting the tree out of the shed. Such lush family memories!
- Trainers Tantrum Tina filmed inside the Nike shop, showing all the Jordans, and said in the caption that she'd sent it to the family chat and the kids were "going crazy".
- in between expensive meals and loving each other the hardest, the gruesome twosome found time to go shopping, no doubt she'll be laden down with Gucci by the time she comes home.
- between Rambo's camel toe, and Joyce's hairy nipples, Tattlers are feeling queasy, not helped by Joyce having to rub suncream into Ratarse's legs because "honestly I'm like a child". Are you a boss babe, or a sweet little girl who can't function without her spineless bleep husband? Make your mind up FFS
- on PatreCON, she said she Jubai is the only place she wants to go back to (because she fits right in with the superficial, vacuous people with more money than sense). She went off on one about "the trolls", saying that her and Stone Island Steve have received "loads of messages" saying they should be ashamed of themselves showing off their expensive holiday during a cost of living crisis. It's not their fault that people are struggling, and she still has to live. She's poured her own (legally but not morally gained) money into the centres and shop to help others, and she helps out everyone around her financially (unless they're toxic). She spent thousands doing up the centres (plus the lottery grants of course). Rabies - anyone can spend their money how they want, nobody gives a tit. What people do give a tit about is that there's absolutely no evidence of you actually helping anyone other than yourself and the occasional mate (giving Sweaty Betty Easter eggs and crisps). Just a reminder, who were the winners of two separate raffles that you ran "to raise money for the centre"? Because you never announced any winners, nobody has turned up in the comments on any of your posts or tagged you saying they'd received their prizes. Almost as if it was all a scam
- there was also a story about Lianne having bought Betsy a dildo (WTF? Why? And why do we need to know about it?) but left it with some sunglasses that needed returning, and Jen accidentally sent the dildo to the sunglasses place.
- after filming Sloshy looking through her coat pockets to find her Rescue Remedy the other day, of course an ad for it followed
- she's now roped in Edie to the clothing reels, showing off an outfit worth over £100. She's obviously hoping for a deal with Zara as she's constantly using their clothes and tagging them.
- back in Jubai, Red Wine Raymond was pissed and in charge of an electric scooter, with Camel Toe Carol on the back, whinging and whining like a spoilt child. "Jooooosh stop it, let me off, bleeping hell, I don't like it, Joooooooosh, you're going too fast". I'd have booted her off the back on purpose and scooted off into the sunset. A second video (filmed by Sloshy? Or Rabies on a second phone?) showed her swearing at Joyce through gritted teeth, and threatening him with divorce https://tattle.life/threads/ptwm-15...ealous-tattlers-oh-are-we.35715/post-12974918
- in the family group chat, BeKind is living up to her reputation as "the kindest teenager ever" by telling Tallulah that she was a better looking child. So lush, that sisterly bond!
- OF COURSE Rambo's come on her period, again. Every time they go away, and bam! Obviously it has to be the worst, heaviest period anyone's ever had
- it's time to come home, and Rabies shared a quick shot of the extra legroom seats on the plane, but they weren't their seats, as the next photo was Sloshy sitting in a normal seat on his phone "reading my book", even though he already read it while putting in his shift at the tat shop. Maybe he couldn't believe the pile of steaming bullshit his wife has come up with, and wanted to read it again to make sure he hadn't dreamt the entire thing.
- she must have spent the entire flight drafting up a load of absolute bollocks for the caption of her Jubai highlights reel. Loads of guff about getting troll messages for showing off her expensive luxury holiday, blah blah blah. She tried to justify it by saying that when her and Sloshua got together, they were so poor (remember, they could only afford salmon for dinner as a treat once a week) and had "so many broken babies" to look after that they "didn't have time to fall in love". 1) a quick flick back on her Instagram shows various holidays without any kids, and a MacBook that Sloshy bought her as a gift. Not really the actions of a couple living on the poverty line; 2) is she admitting that they weren't actually in love at all, so they broke up 2 families and destroyed Joyce's ex wife all for lust? Of course the deluded huns were out in force in the comments "you deserve it babe, you do so much for others, you're the lushest person in the world" etc
with one even claiming that Rambo lived in a refuge when she was a child 
I wonder how long it will be before she weaves that into her backstory.
- back at home, and straight back on the beg, asking for blankets and hot water bottles for the homeless. How about you use some of those vouchers, or use a week's worth of Patreon donations and buy some?
- 13 year old Lula has "taken herself to the hairdresser for a cut and half head of foils". Rambo, that's not normal.
- down at the centre, the ladies on the final session of the fake freedom course have bought gifts for Rancho and her paid mates, because of course they have they celebrated the end of the course discussing their abuse and trauma by making bath bombs - just what abused women need. They were joined by Edie who was off school ill.
- on Patreon, she said Sloshy's a search trained officer, one of the best in the bay. She can't tell us the amount of drugs he's found - well we've all seen you both coked up to the eyeballs enough Ratchet, we know how many he's found with his hooter!
- on PatreCON live, Slosh was wandering around Lula's bedroom looking at her clothes on the floor, looking in her drawers, and complaining about the mess. So without her even being there, they've both invaded her space, and broadcast it live on Instagram. #parentinggoals
- still on live, Edie asked when the elf was coming, meaning that despite plugging Porky Penguin for weeks, Ratface hasn't bothered yet. Hairy Nips Harold butted in to say it wasn't happening, it's a pain every year, and they're not doing it. Just a day after getting back from "falling in love even more" in Jubai, and Rawhide was saying "I hate him" into the camera.
- Bratsy claims to be babysitting Wobbly via Facetime, and Tattlers wouldn't even be surprised if she was. What a sad state of affairs when people can actually believe that two adults with no jobs could leave a 3 year old unattended, only supervised by someone who's miles away on the phone.
- Rambo has finally written a post about how hard it is now that BeKind has moved out. Heartbreaking, sobbing, devastated etc. No mention of how she's kicked her out multiple times to go and stay in a Travelodge, and made her take the wrap for her drug habit (as well as sending her out to go and pick up her weed). But of course, nobody ever warned her how difficult it would be, what she probably means is how difficult it is now that her main babysitter has fucked off, and she's having to leave the cleaner in charge instead.
- she's also sent Bratsy a care package, including Raffle's old scarf (Vivienne Westwood, of course).
- Ratshit and her Snatchwork gang are off to peddle their tacky jumpers at the Christmas tree farm, the jumpers that are being flogged to "support the women at the centre". So of course, tactful as ever, she's wearing a brand new fleece that cost her £140. But remember huns, she's SO caring and kind
- Rectum came on to ramble in the sex loft. What felt like hours of her going on about missing the flight (of course she was sobbing, she thought she was going to be sick, she had to ring everyone's she knows because Joyce wasn't being supportive etc). Anyway, Jubai was lush and amazing, and she'd recommend it to anyone (unless you're gay, or give the tiniest of shits about women and human rights). Although there was loads of "content creators", posing and getting their posts for Instagram, and how ridiculous it all is. Despite her "job" being to create content and post it on Instagram. Ok hun. Somehow, the hapless pair managed to "accidentally" end up in a strip club and got bollocked for sitting at a table that they hadn't paid for. Sloshy was probably gutted that he didn't have his binoculars in his "bag that pays for itself".
- Braggy Brenda shared Edie's "hilarious" Christmas list - which was actually really sad considering she's a 9 year old girl. MacBook, air pods, Dior lip oil, very expensive skin care products and make up, face serums, concealer, mascara, and a FACIAL SHAVER. Not a sniff of a toy, book or game like an ordinary little girl.
- surprise, surprise, Roast Dinner Ronald has cooked yet another bloody roast. No wonder Seb and his mate wanted to go out and get a McDonald's instead. A big pat on the back for Dad of the Year Derek for plating up some dinner for Wilby, well it was about the amount you'd give to a one year old, but baby steps hey. As always, it was served up with no drinks or cutlery, and one the table before anyone was there ready to eat. There wasn't any gravy shown, but we all know it would look like dishwater in the £39 gravy jug.
- Saviour Susan *finally* shared something about the link between high profile football matches/tournaments, and the rise in domestic abuse incidents. Of course, it was a post produced by Women's Aid, and she shared it with no explanation or context.
- despite paying Linda to be there cleaning for seemingly about 20 hours a day, Hairy Nips Henry was cleaning and dusting the shutters, while his lovely wife filmed and took the piss.
- on the beg again, Rasputin is now asking for someone to "entertain the children at the centre during the Christmas holidays" aka "do it for free because I'm a stingy witch". The accompanying picture was of the recycling boxes outside (as in, actual rubbish). That led nicely into the context behind the picture - Sloshy moaning in the group chat about the bin men having not taken the rubbish as it wasn't sorted properly. Bore off Spineless Simon.
- Droning Dan was watching an old Maradona clip, and was then reciting the commentary back to Seb word for word, and saying he'd get it up on YouTube to prove he said it exactly right. How Rhubarb can think he's going to fall penis first into anyone while she's not looking is absolutely preposterous, as any vagina must instantly dry up and clamp shut in a 10 mile radius of the boring, irritating twit.
- Mannah and co came round for a McDonald's, because everyone has a Maccy's after a full roast dinner, don't they? Although looking at the state of Merlot Malcolm's cooking, I'd probably be hungry after as well. Later, Mannah was cutting Wilbert's hair (into a bob to match his mum's). Considering he's level 3 autistic, violent and uncontrollable, she managed perfectly well to get him to sit and let her cut his hair (apart from when Ratchet was filming and distracting him).
- Rumplestiltskin shared a video from one of her Patreon lives, where Private Gormless was telling some tit story about when he was in the army, he looked off his tits and she was giggling and wiping away pretend tears like it was the funniest thing she'd ever heard. Apparently Gangsta Granny used to send him cheese when he was in Iraq.
- Scammy Susie came on to beg for yet more from her followers, while wearing a new £150 hoodie. Apparently last year she bought "all the presents" for the mum and baby unit at Styal Prison (remember, this is the one that's 250 miles away from where she lives). Actually Racquetball, it was your followers who paid for everything you gave out last year, so stop taking the credit. Anyway, she rambled on about the Amazon wish list and how the trolls cleared it ("they went on, bought the products and then returned them so they get refunded". No hun, nobody's spending their own money just to piss you off, all you need to do is mark it as "bought elsewhere", but that doesn't sound as dramatic for the arse lickers, does it). So instead of making a wish list for the trolls to ruin again, you can message her directly with an amount you're willing to spend, and one of the Snatchwork girls will get in touch and let you know what you can buy to donate within your budget. Sneaky witch, this way nobody except her will know exactly how much she's being handed. Once again, she's using the name of a legitimate business to receive post, I wonder whether the criminal lawyers at Bay Advocates know she's using their name and previous address? Oh, and you can also send supermarket e-vouchers for them to make up food parcels to give out. Again, going directly to her so nobody will know how much she's rinsing (although probably enough to do her Christmas food shop, despite the deal with Tesco).
- on PatreCON, Rectum did a Q&A. The house move is off for now, although they want to move out of Torbaydos when Edie is 16 (she clearly knows that Edie's dad would absolutely not let her do it, and if he had to go to court again he has plenty of evidence of her crappy parenting) and they're not bothering with the extension any more (they don't need the room now Bratsy's moved out). Josh misses his work, but loves being Ratchet's lap dog, and is starting a "little college course" in January. Wilbur isn't excited for his nativity, because he doesn't understand anything other than two word sentences, or anything to do with animals. Funny that, because didn't you just video Mannah asking him to sit down so she could cut his hair, and he knew exactly what she meant?
- also on PatreCON, Fungus Flaps showed off loads of boxes full of gifts "for the kids", including some So...? gift sets (like Edie put on her list).
- more q&a on Patreon, Seb's getting a car for his birthday (it probably galls her that she has to because Bratsy got one for her 17th), apparently her kids are open with her because nobody was open with her and she ended up "taking too many drugs, drinking too much alcohol, and getting STDs". So even though you're open with them, they're still running feral and *checks notes* drinking, vaping, taking drugs, and being regulars at the clap clinic". All because nobody bought the trainers you wanted and you had to have egg and chips for tea when you were a teenager. Ok.
- she went live on PatreCON and was sobbing because Lula went to stay over at someone's house, but it turned out to be somewhere else, at the house of one of the boys involved in spreading rumours about her a few months ago. She was asked to bring vodka so she asked Bratsy's mate who's currently living at the Patchwork Palace, who told BeKind. Ratchet confiscated Lula's phone and found loads of used vapes in her room, so asked Isaac whether Lula was "dealing vapes". Top tip Raq - if she was dealing, they wouldn't all be used, more likely she's using them herself. Seb is being vile, he was happy in the summer when he was working and had a girlfriend, but now he's back at college and the girl doesn't want to see him any more, so he's smoking loads of weed because he's skint and depressed. Isaac hasn't had his phone in months because he's too immature. She also implied that Lula is now sexually active, by saying she'd been "making bad choices with her boyfriend", and then talking about "when Betsy started having sex she talked to me but Lula won't do that"
Just a reminder that a D&C police officer was dismissed for misconduct, with the date of this article being the same date as a certain person started their "career break"...
www.devonlive.com
Running total of overnight breaks away since Joyce started his career break on 15 June:
Night at Herpes Lodge (midweek)
Night in Exeter (Saturday)
Night in London (midweek)
July:
Joyce's birthday - one night at Boringdon Hall (midweek), then two nights (Friday and Saturday) in a lodge in Cornwall with Arsetrid and Simon.
October:
Herpes Lodge (weekend), night in London (mid week in half term), Friday night in Southampton
November - 2 nights in London (Sunday and Monday)
December - 5 nights in Jubai
If you are new, please read the wiki (pink button at the top) and if you are in need of support or advice in relation to domestic abuse, there are some links and helplines listed at the bottom of the wiki page
fizzy cat's piss and £1000 worth of Costa vouchers are on their way!Last thread recap:
- Beggy Mitchell is, as always, a greedy, braggy bleep
- she doesn't work either full or part time, and can't be arsed to parent her kids and step kids.
- we're still in Jubai, and Rancid actually went out in public in the camel toe jumpsuit, which she teamed with her ugly Gucci espadrilles (a snip at only £535). Looking lush as always, babe! She did manage to put nipple covers on though, because having your labia visible is fine, but absolutely not the nips!
- back in Torbaydos, PA Jo's job description has been stretched to include "putting up the boss' Christmas tree". Most people with kids like to put the decs up as a family, but not Rabies, "mama to loads of kids". 13 year old Lula was tasked with getting the tree out of the shed. Such lush family memories!
- Trainers Tantrum Tina filmed inside the Nike shop, showing all the Jordans, and said in the caption that she'd sent it to the family chat and the kids were "going crazy".
- in between expensive meals and loving each other the hardest, the gruesome twosome found time to go shopping, no doubt she'll be laden down with Gucci by the time she comes home.
- between Rambo's camel toe, and Joyce's hairy nipples, Tattlers are feeling queasy, not helped by Joyce having to rub suncream into Ratarse's legs because "honestly I'm like a child". Are you a boss babe, or a sweet little girl who can't function without her spineless bleep husband? Make your mind up FFS
- on PatreCON, she said she Jubai is the only place she wants to go back to (because she fits right in with the superficial, vacuous people with more money than sense). She went off on one about "the trolls", saying that her and Stone Island Steve have received "loads of messages" saying they should be ashamed of themselves showing off their expensive holiday during a cost of living crisis. It's not their fault that people are struggling, and she still has to live. She's poured her own (legally but not morally gained) money into the centres and shop to help others, and she helps out everyone around her financially (unless they're toxic). She spent thousands doing up the centres (plus the lottery grants of course). Rabies - anyone can spend their money how they want, nobody gives a tit. What people do give a tit about is that there's absolutely no evidence of you actually helping anyone other than yourself and the occasional mate (giving Sweaty Betty Easter eggs and crisps). Just a reminder, who were the winners of two separate raffles that you ran "to raise money for the centre"? Because you never announced any winners, nobody has turned up in the comments on any of your posts or tagged you saying they'd received their prizes. Almost as if it was all a scam
- there was also a story about Lianne having bought Betsy a dildo (WTF? Why? And why do we need to know about it?) but left it with some sunglasses that needed returning, and Jen accidentally sent the dildo to the sunglasses place.
- after filming Sloshy looking through her coat pockets to find her Rescue Remedy the other day, of course an ad for it followed
- she's now roped in Edie to the clothing reels, showing off an outfit worth over £100. She's obviously hoping for a deal with Zara as she's constantly using their clothes and tagging them.
- back in Jubai, Red Wine Raymond was pissed and in charge of an electric scooter, with Camel Toe Carol on the back, whinging and whining like a spoilt child. "Jooooosh stop it, let me off, bleeping hell, I don't like it, Joooooooosh, you're going too fast". I'd have booted her off the back on purpose and scooted off into the sunset. A second video (filmed by Sloshy? Or Rabies on a second phone?) showed her swearing at Joyce through gritted teeth, and threatening him with divorce https://tattle.life/threads/ptwm-15...ealous-tattlers-oh-are-we.35715/post-12974918
- in the family group chat, BeKind is living up to her reputation as "the kindest teenager ever" by telling Tallulah that she was a better looking child. So lush, that sisterly bond!
- OF COURSE Rambo's come on her period, again. Every time they go away, and bam! Obviously it has to be the worst, heaviest period anyone's ever had
- it's time to come home, and Rabies shared a quick shot of the extra legroom seats on the plane, but they weren't their seats, as the next photo was Sloshy sitting in a normal seat on his phone "reading my book", even though he already read it while putting in his shift at the tat shop. Maybe he couldn't believe the pile of steaming bullshit his wife has come up with, and wanted to read it again to make sure he hadn't dreamt the entire thing.
- she must have spent the entire flight drafting up a load of absolute bollocks for the caption of her Jubai highlights reel. Loads of guff about getting troll messages for showing off her expensive luxury holiday, blah blah blah. She tried to justify it by saying that when her and Sloshua got together, they were so poor (remember, they could only afford salmon for dinner as a treat once a week) and had "so many broken babies" to look after that they "didn't have time to fall in love". 1) a quick flick back on her Instagram shows various holidays without any kids, and a MacBook that Sloshy bought her as a gift. Not really the actions of a couple living on the poverty line; 2) is she admitting that they weren't actually in love at all, so they broke up 2 families and destroyed Joyce's ex wife all for lust? Of course the deluded huns were out in force in the comments "you deserve it babe, you do so much for others, you're the lushest person in the world" etc
with one even claiming that Rambo lived in a refuge when she was a child I wonder how long it will be before she weaves that into her backstory.- back at home, and straight back on the beg, asking for blankets and hot water bottles for the homeless. How about you use some of those vouchers, or use a week's worth of Patreon donations and buy some?
- 13 year old Lula has "taken herself to the hairdresser for a cut and half head of foils". Rambo, that's not normal.
- down at the centre, the ladies on the final session of the fake freedom course have bought gifts for Rancho and her paid mates, because of course they have
they celebrated the end of the course discussing their abuse and trauma by making bath bombs - just what abused women need. They were joined by Edie who was off school ill. - on Patreon, she said Sloshy's a search trained officer, one of the best in the bay. She can't tell us the amount of drugs he's found - well we've all seen you both coked up to the eyeballs enough Ratchet, we know how many he's found with his hooter!
- on PatreCON live, Slosh was wandering around Lula's bedroom looking at her clothes on the floor, looking in her drawers, and complaining about the mess. So without her even being there, they've both invaded her space, and broadcast it live on Instagram. #parentinggoals
- still on live, Edie asked when the elf was coming, meaning that despite plugging Porky Penguin for weeks, Ratface hasn't bothered yet. Hairy Nips Harold butted in to say it wasn't happening, it's a pain every year, and they're not doing it. Just a day after getting back from "falling in love even more" in Jubai, and Rawhide was saying "I hate him" into the camera.
- Bratsy claims to be babysitting Wobbly via Facetime, and Tattlers wouldn't even be surprised if she was. What a sad state of affairs when people can actually believe that two adults with no jobs could leave a 3 year old unattended, only supervised by someone who's miles away on the phone.
- Rambo has finally written a post about how hard it is now that BeKind has moved out. Heartbreaking, sobbing, devastated etc. No mention of how she's kicked her out multiple times to go and stay in a Travelodge, and made her take the wrap for her drug habit (as well as sending her out to go and pick up her weed). But of course, nobody ever warned her how difficult it would be, what she probably means is how difficult it is now that her main babysitter has fucked off, and she's having to leave the cleaner in charge instead.
- she's also sent Bratsy a care package, including Raffle's old scarf (Vivienne Westwood, of course).
- Ratshit and her Snatchwork gang are off to peddle their tacky jumpers at the Christmas tree farm, the jumpers that are being flogged to "support the women at the centre". So of course, tactful as ever, she's wearing a brand new fleece that cost her £140. But remember huns, she's SO caring and kind
- Rectum came on to ramble in the sex loft. What felt like hours of her going on about missing the flight (of course she was sobbing, she thought she was going to be sick, she had to ring everyone's she knows because Joyce wasn't being supportive etc). Anyway, Jubai was lush and amazing, and she'd recommend it to anyone (unless you're gay, or give the tiniest of shits about women and human rights). Although there was loads of "content creators", posing and getting their posts for Instagram, and how ridiculous it all is. Despite her "job" being to create content and post it on Instagram. Ok hun. Somehow, the hapless pair managed to "accidentally" end up in a strip club and got bollocked for sitting at a table that they hadn't paid for. Sloshy was probably gutted that he didn't have his binoculars in his "bag that pays for itself".
- Braggy Brenda shared Edie's "hilarious" Christmas list - which was actually really sad considering she's a 9 year old girl. MacBook, air pods, Dior lip oil, very expensive skin care products and make up, face serums, concealer, mascara, and a FACIAL SHAVER. Not a sniff of a toy, book or game like an ordinary little girl.
- surprise, surprise, Roast Dinner Ronald has cooked yet another bloody roast. No wonder Seb and his mate wanted to go out and get a McDonald's instead. A big pat on the back for Dad of the Year Derek for plating up some dinner for Wilby, well it was about the amount you'd give to a one year old, but baby steps hey. As always, it was served up with no drinks or cutlery, and one the table before anyone was there ready to eat. There wasn't any gravy shown, but we all know it would look like dishwater in the £39 gravy jug.
- Saviour Susan *finally* shared something about the link between high profile football matches/tournaments, and the rise in domestic abuse incidents. Of course, it was a post produced by Women's Aid, and she shared it with no explanation or context.
- despite paying Linda to be there cleaning for seemingly about 20 hours a day, Hairy Nips Henry was cleaning and dusting the shutters, while his lovely wife filmed and took the piss.
- on the beg again, Rasputin is now asking for someone to "entertain the children at the centre during the Christmas holidays" aka "do it for free because I'm a stingy witch". The accompanying picture was of the recycling boxes outside (as in, actual rubbish). That led nicely into the context behind the picture - Sloshy moaning in the group chat about the bin men having not taken the rubbish as it wasn't sorted properly. Bore off Spineless Simon.
- Droning Dan was watching an old Maradona clip, and was then reciting the commentary back to Seb word for word, and saying he'd get it up on YouTube to prove he said it exactly right. How Rhubarb can think he's going to fall penis first into anyone while she's not looking is absolutely preposterous, as any vagina must instantly dry up and clamp shut in a 10 mile radius of the boring, irritating twit.
- Mannah and co came round for a McDonald's, because everyone has a Maccy's after a full roast dinner, don't they? Although looking at the state of Merlot Malcolm's cooking, I'd probably be hungry after as well. Later, Mannah was cutting Wilbert's hair (into a bob to match his mum's). Considering he's level 3 autistic, violent and uncontrollable, she managed perfectly well to get him to sit and let her cut his hair (apart from when Ratchet was filming and distracting him).
- Rumplestiltskin shared a video from one of her Patreon lives, where Private Gormless was telling some tit story about when he was in the army, he looked off his tits and she was giggling and wiping away pretend tears like it was the funniest thing she'd ever heard. Apparently Gangsta Granny used to send him cheese when he was in Iraq.
- Scammy Susie came on to beg for yet more from her followers, while wearing a new £150 hoodie. Apparently last year she bought "all the presents" for the mum and baby unit at Styal Prison (remember, this is the one that's 250 miles away from where she lives). Actually Racquetball, it was your followers who paid for everything you gave out last year, so stop taking the credit. Anyway, she rambled on about the Amazon wish list and how the trolls cleared it ("they went on, bought the products and then returned them so they get refunded". No hun, nobody's spending their own money just to piss you off, all you need to do is mark it as "bought elsewhere", but that doesn't sound as dramatic for the arse lickers, does it). So instead of making a wish list for the trolls to ruin again, you can message her directly with an amount you're willing to spend, and one of the Snatchwork girls will get in touch and let you know what you can buy to donate within your budget. Sneaky witch, this way nobody except her will know exactly how much she's being handed. Once again, she's using the name of a legitimate business to receive post, I wonder whether the criminal lawyers at Bay Advocates know she's using their name and previous address? Oh, and you can also send supermarket e-vouchers for them to make up food parcels to give out. Again, going directly to her so nobody will know how much she's rinsing (although probably enough to do her Christmas food shop, despite the deal with Tesco).
- on PatreCON, Rectum did a Q&A. The house move is off for now, although they want to move out of Torbaydos when Edie is 16 (she clearly knows that Edie's dad would absolutely not let her do it, and if he had to go to court again he has plenty of evidence of her crappy parenting) and they're not bothering with the extension any more (they don't need the room now Bratsy's moved out). Josh misses his work, but loves being Ratchet's lap dog, and is starting a "little college course" in January. Wilbur isn't excited for his nativity, because he doesn't understand anything other than two word sentences, or anything to do with animals. Funny that, because didn't you just video Mannah asking him to sit down so she could cut his hair, and he knew exactly what she meant?
- also on PatreCON, Fungus Flaps showed off loads of boxes full of gifts "for the kids", including some So...? gift sets (like Edie put on her list
). - more q&a on Patreon, Seb's getting a car for his birthday (it probably galls her that she has to because Bratsy got one for her 17th), apparently her kids are open with her because nobody was open with her and she ended up "taking too many drugs, drinking too much alcohol, and getting STDs". So even though you're open with them, they're still running feral and *checks notes* drinking, vaping, taking drugs, and being regulars at the clap clinic". All because nobody bought the trainers you wanted and you had to have egg and chips for tea when you were a teenager. Ok.
- she went live on PatreCON and was sobbing because Lula went to stay over at someone's house, but it turned out to be somewhere else, at the house of one of the boys involved in spreading rumours about her a few months ago. She was asked to bring vodka so she asked Bratsy's mate who's currently living at the Patchwork Palace, who told BeKind. Ratchet confiscated Lula's phone and found loads of used vapes in her room, so asked Isaac whether Lula was "dealing vapes". Top tip Raq - if she was dealing, they wouldn't all be used, more likely she's using them herself. Seb is being vile, he was happy in the summer when he was working and had a girlfriend, but now he's back at college and the girl doesn't want to see him any more, so he's smoking loads of weed because he's skint and depressed. Isaac hasn't had his phone in months because he's too immature. She also implied that Lula is now sexually active, by saying she'd been "making bad choices with her boyfriend", and then talking about "when Betsy started having sex she talked to me but Lula won't do that"
Just a reminder that a D&C police officer was dismissed for misconduct, with the date of this article being the same date as a certain person started their "career break"...
Police officer sacked for using false identity
'Through their actions the officer undermined the public’s trust and confidence in the police force'
Running total of overnight breaks away since Joyce started his career break on 15 June:
Night at Herpes Lodge (midweek)
Night in Exeter (Saturday)
Night in London (midweek)
July:
Joyce's birthday - one night at Boringdon Hall (midweek), then two nights (Friday and Saturday) in a lodge in Cornwall with Arsetrid and Simon.
October:
Herpes Lodge (weekend), night in London (mid week in half term), Friday night in Southampton
November - 2 nights in London (Sunday and Monday)
December - 5 nights in Jubai
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You'd think the wife of not a PC would know that?? No?? My bad 
NO has she just done a birthday shout out without an essay about her or infact any reference to herself !?