I agree, if you can afford it go for it. I had a scan at 7w1d and then another at 10w because I was really anxious as I’d been so poorly and it was amazing to see the difference 
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If you see a heart beat at 9 weeks the chance of a loss is less than 1% statistically. And the way we saw it, if the worst did happen, we would want our families support or at least for them to know. If you can afford it, go for the scan.
And if money isn’t an issues at all, it I’d suggest a more professional, medical type place over window to the womb.
And if money isn’t an issues at all, it I’d suggest a more professional, medical type place over window to the womb.
My family all know because my little boy told them but if anything happens we would want them to know anyway.
We haven't had a private scan. We did consider it because I'm so anxious and I'm convinced there is going to be no heartbeat at my 12 week scan. I just couldn't bring myself to book a scan because I couldn't face being told it's missed miscarriage. Now I've had a bit more time to get my head around it and in a way I've kind of accepted that it's going to be bad news ( I'm always a worst case scenario person and I know it's not a good way to be). We've decided that whatever happens is going to happen regardless so we're just going to wait until the 12 week scan. My scan is the first week of Jan and I didn't want to get bad news right before Christmas when I have my 3 year old to think about so I'd rather wait until then.
We haven't had a private scan. We did consider it because I'm so anxious and I'm convinced there is going to be no heartbeat at my 12 week scan. I just couldn't bring myself to book a scan because I couldn't face being told it's missed miscarriage. Now I've had a bit more time to get my head around it and in a way I've kind of accepted that it's going to be bad news ( I'm always a worst case scenario person and I know it's not a good way to be). We've decided that whatever happens is going to happen regardless so we're just going to wait until the 12 week scan. My scan is the first week of Jan and I didn't want to get bad news right before Christmas when I have my 3 year old to think about so I'd rather wait until then.
I empathise so much. When you have a loss it affects you so much, takes so much joy out of it.
I found the early reassurance scans very helpful… £60 to give me a huge break from my own head, and to inject some joy in to my life.
The thing is I actually haven't had a loss before...
I've been pregnant once before and everything was textbook. I'm very lucky in the sense that both times we've got pregnant the first month we tried. I am surrounded by loss though many family members, friend and work colleagues have struggled with fertility, IVF and miscarriages.
I feel like my time is coming, everything is too easy and it isn't this easy, something has to go wrong at some point.
Morning everyone!
I've just discovered this thread and can tell I'm going to end up spending a lot of time here
I'm currently pregnant with my second baby (10 weeks) and my first born turns 2 next Thursday! I don't have a due date just yet but I estimate it will be some time in July, so my toddler will be bang on 2 1/2. My question is - do I need a double buggy?!
I've just discovered this thread and can tell I'm going to end up spending a lot of time here
I'm currently pregnant with my second baby (10 weeks) and my first born turns 2 next Thursday! I don't have a due date just yet but I estimate it will be some time in July, so my toddler will be bang on 2 1/2. My question is - do I need a double buggy?!Hi all! Baby S was born yesterday after 48 hours of induction and 16 hours of labour, we ended up in theatres having an instrumental. I definitely feel abit of PTSD from the whole experience but our baby girl is so perfect and worth every second of it all! Thanks so much to everyone for their support over the last 8 months have really loved this thread 
CongratulationsHi all! Baby S was born yesterday after 48 hours of induction and 16 hours of labour, we ended up in theatres having an instrumental. I definitely feel abit of PTSD from the whole experience but our baby girl is so perfect and worth every second of it all! Thanks so much to everyone for their support over the last 8 months have really loved this thread
I think the world is surrounded by negativity and people love being negative and telling you you should be worried etc...
I know myself, I've had an easy enough pregnancy realistically I've been tired and a bit sore but nothing too dramatic.. I do know many people that have suffered with miscarriages and had fertility issues as well which is what plays on my mind and how lucky I am to fall pregnant so fast and I should feel grateful. Unfortunately everyone's story is different and some are positive and you shouldn't worry because you haven't had a negative experience. Some people have easy pregnancies or find it easy to get pregnant but we just don't hear about the good stories.
Just wanted to say many of us here have dealt with similar feelings for various different reasons. I also opted again an early scan as in my mind I was convinced I’d receive bad news and I just kept telling myself it was pointless because “I will find out soon one way or another”. I also have a 3 year old and the guilt was eating me up inside because I told myself I would have to break bad news to her.
We obviously can’t tell you that everything is okay but please be reassured that the further along you get the lower the risks are. I had my 12 week scan last week and I was dreading it beyond belief. Spent all morning being sick (with nerves?!) and it turned out I have 2 wriggly little babies in there. Your mind can do crazy things sometimes.
Thinking of you over Christmas
be kind to yourself xxI keep trying to remind myself of this because I had the exact same feelings first time around. I'd got pregnant so quick and easy and had no symptoms that I was sure it would be bad news because it was too easy and everything was fine...
I think it is harder this time because my 3 year old is so excited. We weren't going to tell him until after the scan but he overheard us talking and figured it out.
I have told my mum it's her fault. She's always had the mantra of preparing for the worst because then anything else is a bonu, it's not even prepare for the worst and hope for the best
It's definitely influenced me to think the same.
I’m the same. I haven’t had a loss, this is my first pregnancy and an ‘oops’ baby so it’s not like we went through months of trying. But I have had such bad anxiety because I’ve been surrounded by loss, I know of 3 people who’ve had still births, lots of friends and colleagues who’ve had miscarriages and late miscarriages, and my nephew died when he was 7 months old. It’s all terrified me. I’m 19 weeks now but still can’t relax. I had bleeding last week and it’s sent me in to a meltdown and I’m off for yet another private scan this afternoon to check because I just can’t relax.
I’m so sorry to hear about your nephew and the sad news that has surrounded you.
sending best wishes for your scan this afternoon!
Congratulations! Hope you’re both doing well now. Sorry to hear your birth was somewhat traumatic.Hi all! Baby S was born yesterday after 48 hours of induction and 16 hours of labour, we ended up in theatres having an instrumental. I definitely feel abit of PTSD from the whole experience but our baby girl is so perfect and worth every second of it all! Thanks so much to everyone for their support over the last 8 months have really loved this thread
It’s so lovely to read about all you ladies I’ve been pregnant alongside over the last few months giving birth to your little ones. 5.5 weeks time and my own baby girl will be on the way (or sooner but touch wood!!)
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I’m so sorry to hear about your family / friends experiences. How so very sad to read about your nephew. I know it won’t feel like it as you have known all of these people but these things are very rare and most babies are born healthily or are able to recover from any complications well with medicine and treatment.
However, I also had heavy bleeding approx 3 weeks ago at 31 weeks pregnant and was admitted for 4 days. Up until then my pregnancy had been fine with no issues and so I am definitely spending my final few weeks of pregnancy much more anxiety ridden and noticing every little thing. When you reach 28 weeks you’ll start to have much more regular midwife appts which help me. I now have them fortnightly as I’m 34 weeks. Went today and heard heartbeat and measurements etc done. But I know it’s hard not to be anxious.
Thanks for all the replies. I’m booked in for a private scan at the end of the week.
I’d seen the statistic about seeing the heartbeat at 9 weeks and it was one of the reasons I’d like another scan.
I would have liked to have waited til 10 weeks but wanted to say before Christmas so I don’t have to hide it
I’d seen the statistic about seeing the heartbeat at 9 weeks and it was one of the reasons I’d like another scan.
I would have liked to have waited til 10 weeks but wanted to say before Christmas so I don’t have to hide it
I'm so sorry about your nephew. It's so hard, I think the pregnancy hormones just accentuate all your emotions too which makes it hard to think logically too.
I actually mentioned I was struggling mentally with a few things at my booking appointment and I've got a telephone appointment this week to start some therapy so it is definitely worth speaking to your midwife about it. She also said they had gave to face peer support groups she could refer me to if I feel it would help.
It's hard to relax at any point during pregnancy, with my first everyone said that you only relax once the baby is in your arms. No one told me that the worry continues but just changes, with each stage of their development there is a new worry but you learn to cope with it better and I think you have a better support network by that point too. This first trimester is so hard because it's all so secretive and you're battling your own thoughts a lot of the time.
I'm classed as medium risk this time because of high blood pressure during my last pregnancy. Surprisingly that's not stressing me out too much and I am going to get growth scans which will actually be extra reassurance.
Hi all, new to this thread. Have just found out we are pregnant - very early days - 4 weeks so hoping for the best.
Ordinarily we wouldn’t tell family etc we are pregnant for a while but we are going home for Christmas. I love a drink, enjoy my soft cheese, smoked salmon, caffeinated (!) coffee and oysters - all of which will feature whilst we’re staying with my parents. If it was just the alcohol I could say antibiotics etc but not sure how I’ll explain the rest of it.
Has anyone had a similar experience? How was it/did you make an excuse?
Apologies if this has been asked already
Ordinarily we wouldn’t tell family etc we are pregnant for a while but we are going home for Christmas. I love a drink, enjoy my soft cheese, smoked salmon, caffeinated (!) coffee and oysters - all of which will feature whilst we’re staying with my parents. If it was just the alcohol I could say antibiotics etc but not sure how I’ll explain the rest of it.
Has anyone had a similar experience? How was it/did you make an excuse?
Apologies if this has been asked already
I’m glad I’m reading this already preg/knowing it’s one! I was feeding up until ten weeks (gutted but way too sick to carry on) and was so anxious about multiples and what it would mean financially. If I’d heard this before I’d have been (more) on edge on scan evet
thank you so much! They are fraternal and I am also still breastfeeding my toddler, I read (after conceiving) that apparently you are at quite an increased chance of having twins if you conceive whilst breastfeeding! We also DTD WAY WAY more than we ever usually would so I’m not sure if it’s all coincidental or whatstill feel like I’m dreaming.
I’m already at an increased risk of preterm birth for a few reasons so feeling anxious but hopeful
Firstly congratulations!
In 2019 I was about 4/5 weeks pregnant when it was Christmas. We were at in-laws so we’d told them a few days beforehand and gave them Nozeco so they could give me that when doing drinks as we also had hubby’s siblings in attendance too, but weren’t quite ready to tell everyone at that point.
Luckily they aren’t a soft cheese and pate kind of family anyway so I knew that wasn’t going to be an issue. I needn’t have worried about any of it as I got awful pregnancy sickness on Xmas eve and felt terrible all Xmas day so spent it in bed, which we blamed on food poisoning. All I ended up eating by the evening was some Pringles
Not particularly helpful to you but basically if you’re happy to share your news, it may be more enjoyable to do that than coming up with excuses!
Congrats!Morning everyone!
I've just discovered this thread and can tell I'm going to end up spending a lot of time here
I’m in the same uhming and ahing about a double buggy situation, my toddler will be 2.5 when the baby gets here. He likes to SAY he wants to walk and then switches to wanting carrying (a pain if I’ve not got the carrier - and starting to be uncomfy now anyway) or I have to convince him reluctantly into the buggy.
Things might change, but if they’re the way they are at the min I’ll want a double
a pain as he’s tall for his age too.Also considering a buggy board but they all look so bulky and annoying and weirdly expensive. Wishing I’d gone for the iCandy Orange back with #1 as it has one integrated which looks and seems miles better. Been looking secondhand but they all look either rotten or still pricey as heck and I can’t justify it when I’ve still got a perfectly good travel system and additional buggy kicking around
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This was one of the very few perks of a lockdown pregnancy, so no tips really. It’s hard when others will be so involved with your food, have bought stuff in etc. I’d maybe either say you’ve got an early start on “new year, new me” or let them in on it. No pestering about when you’re planning to eat X then, and maybe a nice bit of being waited on!
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