Pregnancy #4

[I’mThankyou_]

I had my 20 week scan today and had the worst experience ever with the sonographer. So bad that I burst into tears as soon as we walked out and couldn't stop crying She was the most rude, unfriendly person I've ever had the displeasure of meeting!

- She had a go and me and my partner because he was waiting outside but not close enough to the doors so she had to wait about 20 seconds for him to walk in. She shared her annoyance about this to me and also in the room when my partner was there saying if she had to wait for everyone's partners to walk in she would be working until midnight!

- Told me off for not having a full bladder, like actually told me off!! Said she needed to spend too much time trying to look at the organs because the picture wasn't very clear and this was because I hadn't drank enough!? She was scanning me for 45 minutes and it started to hurt so much I had to ask her to stop.

- Mumbled under her breath the whole time (I think she was telling us what she was looking at, but who knows)

- Told me she could see the heart but couldn't get a good enough image to check if there were any holes and that we couldn't go back for another scan because they are at capacity! Also could only find one kidney and couldn't measure the stomach properly.

- She asked half way through if I had any questions about what was on the screen. I said no (close to tears at this point). I expected her at the end to ask if we wanted to know the gender but she didn't, so I asked. She huffed at me and said "I already asked if you had any questions and you said no", put the scanner back on my stomach and then said "I think it's a girl but if you buy anything make sure you keep the receipts". I know it's never 100% but wtf?!

My partner and I were gobsmacked! She ruined the whole experience and I came out feeling absolutely awful. Luckly we managed to book private scan for 2 hours later which was amazing and exactly how I had imagined it. They confirmed all is fine and managed to check everything the lady at the NHS couldn't. Plus we found out we're having a little girl!!

Sorry for the massive rant and thanks if you've read this far, just needed to get it off my chest! Hope you're all okay x

I would most defiantly put in a complaint, this is completely unacceptable behaviour. I am actually shocked, if there was an issue with your bladder not being full enough she could of sent you to drink something and called the next patient in. She has not followed any of the procedures she should of and she shouldn't of let you leave that room until she had every picture and measurement she needed.

If you feel up to it I would definitely contact your local PALS department, or mention it to your midwife as you need that scan not just for your piece of mind but for the health and wellbeing of your precious little baby.

I'm so sorry this happened to you x

Ah just read you managed to get a private scan! so glad everything is fine!

 

[Definitelyme]

@Icbaaaa No way should your manager be asking you to get that changed, that sounds very dodgy to me. I would just go back and say no, the GP is not willing to change it based on the appointment you had, end of story.

@Kitt great news about the screening results coming back quickly, I’m sure it’s put your mind at ease.

@Crazycatlady18 I told my parents before my 12 week scan in my last 3 pregnancies, just because I needed their support and help with older kids as I felt so sick. Told my whole family at 9 weeks this time actually, as we were going to a funeral together (we had to travel to) and wanted them to know why I’d packed so many snacks

 

[Flumperooni]

Did you ladies gain much weight in your first trimester? I’ve put on 2kg and my doctor commented on it this morning Is that too much? My diet has been pretty poor because of nausea and food aversions but I’m just panicking about the weight gain now.

I have had 4 babies and put on 5 stone with each of them (lost it all in between each baby) no one professional ever even weighed me or asked about my weight, aside from the midwife at my booking in appointments. All my babies were born straight forward and healthy.

 

[orange club biscuit]

I initially felt the same as you @Kitt! But there are so many positives too - including one year less of childcare to pay for before your child starts school

 

[I’mThankyou_]

My partner literally doesn’t ask me any of these things because he knows I would go crazy and tell him to mind his own bees wax he is very nice to me but also he loves to wind me up it’s a game he’s been playing for years and still knows how to wind me up in 1 second. Your partner sounds funny if he says anything else funny you should let us know really tickled me about the microwave x

We're definitely going to need to know more of what he says @Lulu Goss I second the microwave comment it made me chuckle but it was too sweet

 

[PineappleTopper]

Haha i am and was before i got pregnant. I have shamed him with your responses and also suggested if he ain't happy with what im eating, he could perhaps be organised and cook some healthy dinners for us this week..

Otherwise my body, my choice pal hahaha

@Nursty how are you feeling generally? If youre not feeling well, sounds like youre doing great to be managing any food

@StrawberryCream you sound healthy too lovely. I would love a jacket potato!! Might have a really cheesy, buttery one sometime this week (with tuna and salad) .. Nom!! So good!!

 

[SavvyBee]

I think people doing IVF know their conception date so it’s different for them. Also some people have like 60 day cycles sometimes so I think it’s more difficult when they’re that extremely long. I think for now with yours being 26-34 just go with your first day of last period and you’ll know more at your scans I was 12+3 at my scan but baby was 13+2 so I lost/gained almost a week even though I knew my exact day of period. Midwife said to go by what baby’s doing at that point so don’t stress too much about it, you’ll get the due date from a scan and then baby won’t arrive on that day anyway haha

Haha good point, I’ve always said I wouldn’t even tell people the actual due date to avoid them bugging me on it! November feels SO far away!

 

[Definitelyme]

Old people always think they know best. Then get pissed off when we say we don’t do it that way any more as if we are personally offending them I always say things like “yes but you lot didn’t wear seatbelts either” luckily my mum now knows better, and I just ignore everyone’s advice anyway and do what I want. My mil is too sweet to say anything.

 

[Ilando]

I used to get up and swig sprite from a 2L bottle first thing! You gotta do what you gotta do!

I second this. I’ve had some days when I can’t eat at all and the only thing I can stomach is full sugar drinks. Probably going to end up with ges

Finally think I'm getting over the sickness and nausea

Think the cravings have kicked in....today was donuts, I just NEEDED them

Made a batch of gluten free donuts (I'm allergic to wheat so can't just jump to the shops when I feel like I need them) and have eaten 12 (they are only bitesize but still )

This sounds familiar. I lost 2.5 stone during my 1st trimester. I’m now 15 weeks and needed cauliflower cheese today!!! Husband has just got home from work to find me eating a family sized portion that has more than 2 days worth of calories and fat in it think my body needed it!

 

[Squiggle]

I follow Dani Dyer on insta and she put up a few posts about how good the H&M nursing bras are, I’ve been looking at them too.

I haven’t worn “proper” bras for ages now, the joys of working from home I got some soft triangle ones from ASOS the other day and they’re ok for now but not much coverage so I think I’m going to get some more appropriate ones haha

Talking of H&M, I have their maternity jeans. Got them October/November time and they have been amazing. Still in them at 31 weeks, no sign of ripping. Hoping they will last me to the end!

 

[WhatABore]

Has anyone had a smear test whilst pregnant? I've had a letter today to say I'm overdue (first I've heard) and should contact them as soon as possible. I've read mixed things. Wondering if better to go now than after!

You can't have them whilst pregnant. You have to wait until 12 weeks after

 

[Sw4]

I had my 20 week scan today and had the worst experience ever with the sonographer. So bad that I burst into tears as soon as we walked out and couldn't stop crying She was the most rude, unfriendly person I've ever had the displeasure of meeting!

- She had a go and me and my partner because he was waiting outside but not close enough to the doors so she had to wait about 20 seconds for him to walk in. She shared her annoyance about this to me and also in the room when my partner was there saying if she had to wait for everyone's partners to walk in she would be working until midnight!

- Told me off for not having a full bladder, like actually told me off!! Said she needed to spend too much time trying to look at the organs because the picture wasn't very clear and this was because I hadn't drank enough!? She was scanning me for 45 minutes and it started to hurt so much I had to ask her to stop.

- Mumbled under her breath the whole time (I think she was telling us what she was looking at, but who knows)

- Told me she could see the heart but couldn't get a good enough image to check if there were any holes and that we couldn't go back for another scan because they are at capacity! Also could only find one kidney and couldn't measure the stomach properly.

- She asked half way through if I had any questions about what was on the screen. I said no (close to tears at this point). I expected her at the end to ask if we wanted to know the gender but she didn't, so I asked. She huffed at me and said "I already asked if you had any questions and you said no", put the scanner back on my stomach and then said "I think it's a girl but if you buy anything make sure you keep the receipts". I know it's never 100% but wtf?!

My partner and I were gobsmacked! She ruined the whole experience and I came out feeling absolutely awful. Luckly we managed to book private scan for 2 hours later which was amazing and exactly how I had imagined it. They confirmed all is fine and managed to check everything the lady at the NHS couldn't. Plus we found out we're having a little girl!!

Sorry for the massive rant and thanks if you've read this far, just needed to get it off my chest! Hope you're all okay x

God I'm so sorry to hear this but glad your private one went well and congrats! Definitely wise to complain, that's shocking behaviour and shoddy work.

I feel really lucky with my 20 week scan now reading some of these stories. She went through literally every organ in detail with us and because I went in with a really full bladder she was like, wow you must be v uncomfortable, go and pee before I carry on! When she was checking the spine there was one bit she couldn't see due to baby position so she sent me off for a walk to try and get baby to move and luckily she did move and the sonographer was able to capture everything. Think she ran late because of this but was so lovely and professional the whole time. I thought this was just normal standard of care but reading stories I can see that I was probably very lucky to have the experience I did.

I would expect every anomaly scan to be like this considering it's such an important medical appointment for you and baby, they can't just decide they don't want to look for a second kidney or examine the heart properly simply because baby was in a funny position, imagine if she'd missed something major that needed a life-altering decision. Totally unacceptable.

 

[StrawberryCream]

Don’t ever feel silly for asking for a scan. Bleeding in pregnancy is a real worry even if things are still ok. By the time my 12 week scan came around I had already had 5 scans due to bleeding. One of those scans was the day before my actual booked 12 weeks scan as I just couldn’t wait the extra day to make sure all was well. I’m now almost 27 weeks pregnant and every single time I use the toilet I still check the paper for blood. I think any woman who has had bleeding in pregnancy will agree that they do the same. I hope all turns out well for you tomorrow. Xx

I am the same, nearly 30 weeks now and still check toilet paper every single time, I had red bleeding at 8 weeks with this pregnancy and everything was normal, didn’t even find out what caused it

 

[Ilando]

I’d hoped my sickness would be getting better by now- I’m 15 weeks.

Got more medication from the GP this morning and she said ‘I’ll give you another months worth just to be getting with’- that comment didn’t fill me with much hope

 

[WhatABore]

Didn't get braxton hicks in my last 2 pregnancies apart from if I walked really fast.
But today. My gosh. Its been constant even sitting down!

No point to this post at all but

 

[Sally1993]

Not me but my friend. She went for a private scan at 16 weeks and was told boy. They bought loads of boy stuff, furniture etc went for nhs scan at 20 weeks and was told it was girl. They had to book another private scan because they didn't believe it and she was def a girl.
Has this happened to you just the other way round?

Something similar happened to me! I ordered a home blood test from Sneak Peek to find out the gender of our baby. We did it at 10 weeks and got the result of boy!

I bought a couple of boy clothes but luckily didn’t buy too much, because at the 20 week scan - the sonographer looked at me with a confused expression as I told her it was a boy and just wanted to confirm this - she said in all her 25 years she’s only been wrong twice and this was definitely a girl!!

 

[Tui]

Gahhh is it bad that I’m already getting impatient at 37+5 cos there are now 2 babies born in my NCT group pretty good chances I’ll be last as well as the two ladies due after me may be having CS/induction. So irrational and selfish but really want the baby to be here now!

 

[Easilyannoyed]

Actually very concerning about the lack of discussion of birth plans pain relief etc my friend said she has a great midwife and birth plan she was high risk so she had loads of scans etc I live around 100+ miles from her end I recon my care will differ. I felt my scan was eally rushed on Friday my doctors are really not the best & trying to get a midwife appointment I think hasn’t been without it’s challenges genuinely didn’t expect it to be like this If I’m being honest x

 

[Definitelyme]

Yes I am bloody exhausted today, I could actually go to bed right now. where is this second trimester energy at?
Have you guys bought any new clothes or baby stuff yet? I just spent £100 on new bras as I could barely breathe in the one I was wearing yesterday!

I gave up bras after Christmas when we went back in to lockdown. I find wearing them really makes my back sore now, probably because they are too tight

@Lulu Goss I have only ever had nursing bras and vests from H&M and they are great

 

[Definitelyme]

Oh god bonkers to buy a pink car seat unless you aren’t planning on any other children?! I don’t have all blue clothes, think the pink/blue thing is a bit naff and I love dinosaurs so would want any little girl of mine to like them too but there was defo a penis there!

Yes! I used to have a friend and we were pregnant with our first babies at the same time. She found out she was having a girl and everything was pink (including the ceiling in the room!) playmat, bouncer, everything.

her second was a boy By then we weren’t friends but I do often wonder what she did with all the pink!