My husband was groomed by a friend of his family when he was 14/15. His dad had just divorced his mum so was working all hours to make sure they had money to live. This man was a neighbour and used that as a reason to worm his way in. He’d help out in the house etc.
My husband said it started off as this cool older man who he’d hang out with as his brother had just gone to uni so he was alone a lot after school. He then started to do things like “accidentally” stroking my husbands leg when watching films, putting his arms around him when sat next to him and then progressed to more.
My husband said he didn’t have a clue what was going on until it went too far. He suppressed the memories until 10 years later when he met me, it all came back a year after we were together and he thought he was gay. Spent years in therapy to help him cope and to realise he had been groomed. He got better but it came back when we had our daughter 6 years ago as he was (and still is) terrified of her being groomed like he was. He never reported the man (I understand it’s his decision but I find it so hard to understand, especially seen as this man now has a wife and kids) but said he may one day. He has only just told his family about what happened last year, it’s taken that long for him to “recover” and accept what happened.
I hope him and his filthy brother Rot for what they do. They ruin lives and the people’s future.
Lurker on this thread usually but this has really hit home for me. I myself am in a similar situation as your husband having been groomed at the age of 14, by a man in his late 30s. I buried it emotionally until recently as in the last 2 years with every passing month it coming more to the surface for some reason. I can only think maybe my daughter growing up has brought it back for me and the reality of the trauma has hit me so hard at times. I've also not reported it yet have thought about it so, so many times and that constant yo-yo of emotions has been horrific on me as it consumes me regularly. For me I think not being believed after so long is part of it, and just generally feeling disgusting to be honest. As well as it just being out there is scary as like your husband very few people know my story. I actually can't believe I've just put it on here, but I've become much more accepting of my emotions around it the last year I would say and I'm 43. I think MM when he's older he may be the same as its true that we bury this until something finally gives. Thank you for sharing your story as it's allowed me to share a bit of mine and I know for me that's part of my healing.