Niomi Smart #34 No mask in sight, can't quarantine right, fake dating forky out of spite

[Callan]

Does Barfy, I mean Forky read here?

Yeah how do I get it for free the way you get your presents Forky? ( I don't want it btw lol)

She was talking then she posed like the worlds happiest woman

Never been to France twice before Froky gets snails again, gag

def fish on her plate

these comments are hilarious

 

[serasera]

Obviously I dislike Niomi but you have to hand it to her, she manages to snap up some cushy brand deals. Her own lipstick line with L'Occitane, an ongoing partnership with Dior, she had a selfie posted on the casetify instagram (which every second influencer shills and Nimbobs managed to get her face on their insta, I wonder how much she was paid for that), gifted luxury cars, I'm sure there's more but I haven't dug that far. Brands must be impressed by her being an original Gleamer and maintaining a modicum of professionalism by actually attending events and meetings, I'd imagine the average influencer isn't all that impressive when attempting a conversation in a professional setting.

I can't imagne living such a shallow life and maintaining a sense of self worth and satisfaction in my job. These people are human billboards.

A bit about Dior - Like all luxury designer brands, they have a questionable track record. John Galliano was fired for making anti semitic comments that were filmed, and Natalie Portman wanted to quit her ambassadorship of Miss Dior, she's Jewish, but I believe contractual legalities meant she stayed on. Maria Grazia's taste tends to err on cultrual appropriation and romanticising class stratification and colonialism, but that's only my opinion. The toile de jouy, Niomi's gifted bag, has an orientalist jungle motif on it, why these white women find it fashionable to adorn their lives with these prints is beyond me. Toile de jouy became popular in 18th century France, with aristorcats decorating their homes with motifs of domestic and agricultural labor, it was an obscene display of privilege within seigneurial feudalism, and Dior have tried to bring it back into popularity (it's always been around). Luxury fashion and wealth are just truly bonkers.

 

[Hubrisand]

Super late to the party but why’s her new bf nicknamed forky on here?

 

[Callan]

Super late to the party but why’s her new bf nicknamed forky on here?

He eats sushi with a fork, haha I googled it and found the pix.

Oh wow, that is this hot garbage all about.. here's again with Men and Alpha males while he has the voice of a teenager lol.

 

[meowmeowmeow3030!!]

Yeah how do I get it for free the way you get your presents Forky? ( I don't want it btw lol)

I disagree i would love to own a GIT bottle and mat I want to be just like the forkster and smash my goals

 

[kalechips]

I glanced over the SmartSkin Instagram account for the very first time and saw this:

View attachment 931556

Haven’t realized how the products were amazingly efficient that you can see results by one single application did Niomi send this message again?

I'm convinced people send these types of messages in hopes of getting reposted on an influencer/celebrity's IG stories

 

[meowmeowmeow3030!!]

I just can’t see her havign the same level of affection for fork that she did for joe

oh Joeeeyyyyy
Oh forkkkyyyy

it just doesn’t fit was she affectionate with Marcus? I didn’t watch them much back in the early days

 

[Callan]

I just can’t see her havign the same level of affection for fork that she did for joe

oh Joeeeyyyyy
Oh forkkkyyyy

it just doesn’t fit was she affectionate with Marcus? I didn’t watch them much back in the early days

I got a very cold vibe from their relationship which was from watching her channel, it didn't look believable that they were that into each other.

 

[irvinelane]

She was talking then she posed like the worlds happiest woman

View attachment 931858

Niomi pretending to laugh when Bradley is filming:

By the way, she’s never worn red lipstick/nailpolish as much since she’s been fake dating Bradley. He must like that slutty escort look.

 

[lilamay]

The size of that gift from Dior

Edit: OMG that is a £2,400 bag . Didn't she also get one last year in a different colour?!

View attachment 931258

Even more recently - in July this year!

Screenshot from @BeatrixA, first posted here: https://tattle.life/threads/niomi-s...with-nowhere-to-go.20316/page-48#post-5541064

 

[lemonlime]

That fugly bag makes me laugh. Dior used to hold a different image in my head prior to this influencer trash. I love their vintage designs with Christian Dior, Yves Saint Laurent and early Marc Bohan. I find Galliano to be a horrid guy and I don't want to celebrate him but his designs were exciting even if they weren't really my thing. I find it hilarious that in attempts to be chummy with influencers for easy and cheap marketing, they've reshaped their brand image to be the bargain bin of designers. I'm glad I can't ever afford Dior, I'd rather stick to my non-problematic tote bags than waste a single quid on that 'bag for life' looking thing and practically be a free billboard for them with that enormous brand name plastered on it. Tacky doesn't begin to cover it, perfect fit for Niomi. She can advertise her multi-thousand pound bags while people are worrying about heating bills everywhere. I am tired of clueless influencers taking the piss with this wealth display.

 

[sitkx]

I got a very cold vibe from their relationship which was from watching her channel, it didn't look believable that they were that into each other.

yeah and also they acted almost like strangers, especially whenever serious questions came up. The thing that comes to mind is their video about moving to India, that entire thing is such a mess. I can't resist pulling it apart lol




The video starts off on a horribly awkward note. Joey says "so this is...this is what you do. This is it."

(Niomi's I AM NOT AN INFLUENCER video coming in 3...2...1...)

Joey then proceeds to say with much chagrin, "this is....nice. Maybe I'll --"

Niomi finishes his sentence with " -- get used to this? No."

(Niomi smiling through the resentment)

Joey then explains what the role in India is, and concludes with: "But most of all, I'm just so thrilled that you're excited for it as well..."
Niomi, in the most insincere tone: "OFCOSSSS"

(the face you make when saying something you really don't mean)


Niomi says that when she told her friends the news, her friends assumed it would be NY, LA, or Sydney, to which Niomi told them "no0o0o...", with the tone of voice that implies "I bleeping wish it was"

(Joe realizing he'll never hear the end of it, as Niomi complains about it being India rather than NY, LA, or Sydney)

NiomI: "last year Freddie your brother was in my vlogs rather than you Cause Joey was in India!!!" *crazed look*

Some of you might think I'm reading too much into this, but over time Niomi stopped referring to Freddie as Freddie, and started referring to him as "Joey's brother", which seems to be some weird passive-aggressive choice

Joey tells the viewers why he loves India and Niomi makes this face:

(That's the "Sure Jan" face)

Niomi says she was really surprised there were a lot of vegan places in INDIA. Let that sink in. "I didn't realize veganism was that much of a thing out there. I did A LOT of research".

She shows a map of Mumbai with all the places she wants to visit. "Oh look I tagged a bakery for you, cause you LOVE bread. He loves bread...", she shrugs and says in the most judgmental tone she could muster.

(Niomi confused at how anyone on Earth could love bread. God forbid)

After some more explanations, Niomi says "don't worry, it's not like we're gonna pack our bags and move to India forever. We'll be back here for the summers.......RIGHT????...I don't know..."

(Niomi panicking that she'll be in India "forever")

(Joe realizing he's gonna have to propose)

Niomi then panics and turns to Joey and AGAIN asks pleadingly "I don't know. RIGHT?" (about coming back to UK for the summers)
To which Joey bravely and cockily says "I don't know."

(Legend says Joey lost all his bread rations for that week, and also his peanut butter privileges)

Imagine sitting down to film a video about moving to India, never once having discussed the terms of their move with one another.

The video ends with Joe saying "I'm excited", Niomi replies "I'm excited too", after which the camera cuts, and she repeats "No...it will be great...", like a mantra that she doesn't believe in.

 

[irvinelane]

yeah and also they acted almost like strangers, especially whenever serious questions came up. The thing that comes to mind is their video about moving to India, that entire thing is such a mess. I can't resist pulling it apart lol




The video starts off on a horribly awkward note. Joey says "so this is...this is what you do. This is it."
View attachment 932090
(Niomi's I AM NOT AN INFLUENCER video coming in 3...2...1...)

Joey then proceeds to say with much chagrin, "this is....nice. Maybe I'll --"
View attachment 932092

Niomi finishes his sentence with " -- get used to this? No."
View attachment 932093
(Niomi smiling through the resentment)

Joey then explains what the role in India is, and concludes with: "But most of all, I'm just so thrilled that you're excited for it as well..."
Niomi, in the most insincere tone: "OFCOSSSS"

View attachment 932096View attachment 932143
(the face you make when saying something you really don't mean)


Niomi says that when she told her friends the news, her friends assumed it would be NY, LA, or Sydney, to which Niomi told them "no0o0o...", with the tone of voice that implies "I bleeping wish it was"
View attachment 932100
(Joe realizing he'll never hear the end of it, as Niomi complains about it being India rather than NY, LA, or Sydney)

NiomI: "last year Freddie your brother was in my vlogs rather than you Cause Joey was in India!!!" *crazed look*
View attachment 932106





Joey tells the viewers why he loves India and Niomi makes this face:
View attachment 932108
(That's the "Sure Jan" face)

Niomi says she was really surprised there were a lot of vegan places in INDIA. Let that sink in. "I didn't realize veganism was that much of a thing out there. I did A LOT of research".

She shows a map of Mumbai with all the places she wants to visit. "Oh look I tagged a bakery for you, cause you LOVE bread. He loves bread...", she shrugs and says in the most judgmental tone she could muster.
View attachment 932111
(Niomi confused at how anyone on Earth could love bread. God forbid)

After some more explanations, Niomi says "don't worry, it's not like we're gonna pack our bags and move to India forever. We'll be back here for the summers.......RIGHT????...I don't know..."
View attachment 932114
(Niomi panicking that she'll be in India "forever")

View attachment 932117
(Joe realizing he's gonna have to propose)

Niomi then panics and turns to Joey and AGAIN asks pleadingly "I don't know. RIGHT?" (about coming back to UK for the summers)
To which Joey bravely and cockily says "I don't know."
View attachment 932122
(Legend says Joey lost all his bread rations for that week, and also his peanut butter privileges)

Imagine sitting down to film a video about moving to India, never once having discussed the terms of their move with one another.

The video ends with Joe saying "I'm excited", Niomi replies "I'm excited too", after which the camera cuts, and she repeats "No...it will be great...", like a mantra that she doesn't believe in.

This is SO GOOD well, this video is so awkward and hypocrite, but your explanation is so good, thank you for making me laugh!

Niomi said she hasn’t deleted the old videos from her YouTube channel because she couldn’t bear to look at them. She really should, it would be a great part of an introspection she really must have.

 

[sitkx]

This is SO GOOD well, this video is so awkward and hypocrite, but your explanation is so good, thank you for making me laugh!

Niomi said she hasn’t deleted the old videos from her YouTube channel because she couldn’t bear to look at them. She really should, it would be a great part of an introspection she really must have.

Thank you, I'm glad I could make you laugh!

As for her not being able to "bear to look at them", I think she was just using that as an excuse..cause she could always just ask her editor or someone in her family to log into her account and private them. I feel like (1) she can't bear to lose the AD revenue, and (2) a part of her wants people to know she had a "pahhhfect" relationship with dreamy Joey, despite it ending badly!

 

[lilamay]

yeah and also they acted almost like strangers, especially whenever serious questions came up. The thing that comes to mind is their video about moving to India, that entire thing is such a mess. I can't resist pulling it apart lol




The video starts off on a horribly awkward note. Joey says "so this is...this is what you do. This is it."
View attachment 932090
(Niomi's I AM NOT AN INFLUENCER video coming in 3...2...1...)

Joey then proceeds to say with much chagrin, "this is....nice. Maybe I'll --"
View attachment 932092

Niomi finishes his sentence with " -- get used to this? No."
View attachment 932093
(Niomi smiling through the resentment)

Joey then explains what the role in India is, and concludes with: "But most of all, I'm just so thrilled that you're excited for it as well..."
Niomi, in the most insincere tone: "OFCOSSSS"

View attachment 932096View attachment 932143
(the face you make when saying something you really don't mean)


Niomi says that when she told her friends the news, her friends assumed it would be NY, LA, or Sydney, to which Niomi told them "no0o0o...", with the tone of voice that implies "I bleeping wish it was"
View attachment 932100
(Joe realizing he'll never hear the end of it, as Niomi complains about it being India rather than NY, LA, or Sydney)

NiomI: "last year Freddie your brother was in my vlogs rather than you Cause Joey was in India!!!" *crazed look*
View attachment 932106





Joey tells the viewers why he loves India and Niomi makes this face:
View attachment 932108
(That's the "Sure Jan" face)

Niomi says she was really surprised there were a lot of vegan places in INDIA. Let that sink in. "I didn't realize veganism was that much of a thing out there. I did A LOT of research".

She shows a map of Mumbai with all the places she wants to visit. "Oh look I tagged a bakery for you, cause you LOVE bread. He loves bread...", she shrugs and says in the most judgmental tone she could muster.
View attachment 932111
(Niomi confused at how anyone on Earth could love bread. God forbid)

After some more explanations, Niomi says "don't worry, it's not like we're gonna pack our bags and move to India forever. We'll be back here for the summers.......RIGHT????...I don't know..."
View attachment 932114
(Niomi panicking that she'll be in India "forever")

View attachment 932117
(Joe realizing he's gonna have to propose)

Niomi then panics and turns to Joey and AGAIN asks pleadingly "I don't know. RIGHT?" (about coming back to UK for the summers)
To which Joey bravely and cockily says "I don't know."
View attachment 932122
(Legend says Joey lost all his bread rations for that week, and also his peanut butter privileges)

Imagine sitting down to film a video about moving to India, never once having discussed the terms of their move with one another.

The video ends with Joe saying "I'm excited", Niomi replies "I'm excited too", after which the camera cuts, and she repeats "No...it will be great...", like a mantra that she doesn't believe in.

omg this video is pure gold at showing the cracks in their relationship. Great summary

Dimbob's exasperated little sigh at 1:55 though

And talking over him at 2:17, saying 'it's going to amazing' in the most insincere tone.

 

[laplusheureuse96]

yeah and also they acted almost like strangers, especially whenever serious questions came up. The thing that comes to mind is their video about moving to India, that entire thing is such a mess. I can't resist pulling it apart lol




The video starts off on a horribly awkward note. Joey says "so this is...this is what you do. This is it."
View attachment 932090
(Niomi's I AM NOT AN INFLUENCER video coming in 3...2...1...)

Joey then proceeds to say with much chagrin, "this is....nice. Maybe I'll --"
View attachment 932092

Niomi finishes his sentence with " -- get used to this? No."
View attachment 932093
(Niomi smiling through the resentment)

Joey then explains what the role in India is, and concludes with: "But most of all, I'm just so thrilled that you're excited for it as well..."
Niomi, in the most insincere tone: "OFCOSSSS"

View attachment 932096View attachment 932143
(the face you make when saying something you really don't mean)


Niomi says that when she told her friends the news, her friends assumed it would be NY, LA, or Sydney, to which Niomi told them "no0o0o...", with the tone of voice that implies "I bleeping wish it was"
View attachment 932100
(Joe realizing he'll never hear the end of it, as Niomi complains about it being India rather than NY, LA, or Sydney)

NiomI: "last year Freddie your brother was in my vlogs rather than you Cause Joey was in India!!!" *crazed look*
View attachment 932106





Joey tells the viewers why he loves India and Niomi makes this face:
View attachment 932108
(That's the "Sure Jan" face)

Niomi says she was really surprised there were a lot of vegan places in INDIA. Let that sink in. "I didn't realize veganism was that much of a thing out there. I did A LOT of research".

She shows a map of Mumbai with all the places she wants to visit. "Oh look I tagged a bakery for you, cause you LOVE bread. He loves bread...", she shrugs and says in the most judgmental tone she could muster.
View attachment 932111
(Niomi confused at how anyone on Earth could love bread. God forbid)

After some more explanations, Niomi says "don't worry, it's not like we're gonna pack our bags and move to India forever. We'll be back here for the summers.......RIGHT????...I don't know..."
View attachment 932114
(Niomi panicking that she'll be in India "forever")

View attachment 932117
(Joe realizing he's gonna have to propose)

Niomi then panics and turns to Joey and AGAIN asks pleadingly "I don't know. RIGHT?" (about coming back to UK for the summers)
To which Joey bravely and cockily says "I don't know."
View attachment 932122
(Legend says Joey lost all his bread rations for that week, and also his peanut butter privileges)

Imagine sitting down to film a video about moving to India, never once having discussed the terms of their move with one another.

The video ends with Joe saying "I'm excited", Niomi replies "I'm excited too", after which the camera cuts, and she repeats "No...it will be great...", like a mantra that she doesn't believe in.

Lmaooo, love the summary! Agreed, there really was a coldness between them, at least in the videos we saw. I never believed for a second that theirs was a “passionate” relationship (which she claimed later on).

I’m also baffled at how they really didn’t seem to be on the same page about their move - not knowing when/whether they will be back in the UK the next year before starting the video? Really? They didn’t talk about this properly at all. Niomi just went with it to be paaaahfect “wifey material” for Joeyyy

 

[irvinelane]

Niomi telling her family how happy and excited she is about moving to India:

 

[queenam]

He eats sushi with a fork, haha I googled it and found the pix.

View attachment 931952

Oh wow, that is this hot garbage all about.. here's again with Men and Alpha males while he has the voice of a teenager lol.

View attachment 931957

View attachment 931958

Plsss share the link to this? I really wanna watch this tit show.

 

[irvinelane]

Yes and if she stays 100% vegan, he might lose interest in her which would be tragic since he’s been the only one for now to keep her entertained.

 

[juliherzi]

This is SO GOOD well, this video is so awkward and hypocrite, but your explanation is so good, thank you for making me laugh!

Niomi said she hasn’t deleted the old videos from her YouTube channel because she couldn’t bear to look at them. She really should, it would be a great part of an introspection she really must have.

She most certainly hasn’t deleted the videos cause she wants the $$. She knows people will be watching back her videos.

also re the bags - she seems to only get the ugly dior bags which makes me laugh there are so many amazing ones they do but they choose to gift her THOSE urgh yikes!
Also has anyone ever seen her wear them out? Probs not.