Niomi Smart #12 Back at home drinking alone, dressing sexy with no one to bone

[Leggyloony]

Oh my god. I can't cope with how she speaks now. She wishes so badly she was Kate Middleton/Audrey Hepburn. She's one of those people who keeps banging on about a celebrity until people tell her she looks like them. It makes me so irrationally angry.

 

[Mr.Mistoffelees]

There's nothing I love more than being preached about learning and reading from a quasi-intellectual, image-obsessed influencer whose only encounter with books stems from her mom's wallpaper...

 

[ktboo]

My two cents

- I do believe Joey & Nimbob were happy
for a while. Funnily enough I think cracks began to show at the time of their engagement. Joe obviously knew about India and I reckon Nim made it clear that if she was going to uproot her life to India then she wanted some hardcore commitment from him. Hence the proposal.
- COVID and lockdown really messed with Joeys mental health. He lost his dream job. He faced going back to England with his tail between his legs. I can imagine Niomi being unsympathetic at this point. I think she was secretly glad that they would be coming back to England which probably got under Joeys skin.
- Coupled with the fact that I can imagine Niomi being very incessant about the wedding “Oooo Joey now were in lockdown we have so much time to plan the wedding!!!” Which would have pissed him off as 1) he was pressured into proposing 2) his dream job has fell through and he cba planning a wedding.
- I believe there was a lot of resentment on his part. The more she flounced about pretending everything was perfect, the more he resented her.
- it was all boiling under the surface then one night he cracked. I don’t think it was a straight dumping. I reckon he wanted to chat openly about things but that contradicts Nims version of being perfect. So she ultimately ended it with no opportunity for an open dialogue. She’s way too stubborn to talk about problems.

 

[domfran]

I totally agree with all of you who said that everyone has the right to complain about hardships in their life, even if they are privileged, lucky and have a great life objectively. I think the problem with Niomi doing it is that she's being tone-deaf. What if she complained about being financially stressed because she can only afford a £x million house and not the £xx dream house she wanted? She could be well stressed about it, but some things are better shared with your friends and family, no need to broadcast to 1.4 million people who probably have it harder than you.

Everything is relative, we just need to have some sensitivity and know our audience. For example, someone telling Niomi right now how stressed they are about planning their wedding would be very inappropriate. Even if you genuinely feel a certain way and have the right to complain about it doesn't mean you should. That's what friends and family are for, and we know she has them for support.

 

[Callan]

Honestly we only see one side of the story and their relationship here since we don't get Joe's input as he's not living and profiting off his life of the internet the way Niomi does, it's hard to take her video with a balanced point of view. I don't think it's fair to make him some monster who waited until she tried on a wedding dress to break her heart. At least he had the balls to do it before the whole thing was wrapped up and they were married.

The way she treated Covid alone makes me weary to trust her crocodile tears, we've all had heartbreaks if we shared our heart with someone else, so she's not alone here in that corner of bonding and pain we go through as people but her motivations to posting certain things or not is probably guided by money and her "work" obligations...I had to give birth recently screaming into a mask, I still haven't seen my parents since March and they haven't even been able to meet my baby since we don't live close.. she's been shamelessly selfish with her self loving and healing whatever the fk that means with so many people she's been around that it's maddening, meeting up with multiple people who are nurses or pregnant or living with a couple and their new baby!... she had a break up, she didn't lose a limb in line of duty guys... its hard to keep perspective with Youtubers as they are premo bullshit artists protecting their money while mostly showing us what they want us to see...

 

[Shutterbug99]

Wow. Joe left it late to back out (deposits paid, bridesmaid asked, dresses tried on). I do think it's a dick move to let things get to that point if you've been having doubts for a while (and I'm sure he would have been having doubts for a while). Still, better late in the planning process than actually ditching her at the altar. I'd love to hear his side of the story. Joe comes across as a nice enough guy but he could be a real dickhead for all any of us know!

I still think that revolting looking pizza may have been the final straw!

I'm not buying for one second that Nims is happy this happened to her. I do feel for her (though she still annoys me). Wouldn't wish it on anyone.

 

[Yel]

14 mins in and hard agree. Loads of self-congratulation going on. It seems like yet another 'I'm so perfect, I intuitively just knew I had to go into self care mode, I somehow just knew I had to start writing my thoughts down'

I suspect it's all been planned for months, once ad rates reach their peak release the "honest, genuine and emotive" video tO HeLp oThEr pEoPle.

Girl has 800k cash in the bank, a family with a huge estate and talks about having no where to live.

Oh please. She's a social media influencer throughout.

 

[imsorryabtthisacct]

I think some people on this thread are determined to think the worst of her no matter what. She said twice in that video that she was thinking about the impact on her family. That’s not selfish.
I don’t agree with her behaviour around Covid. I also think she’s taken the self love thing a bit too far at times by literally checking herself out on camera & other stuff along those lines, plus she’s been passive aggressive & lacks depth etc.
But, this video felt genuine for the most part & while the right path thing isn’t for me I’m glad she explained it.

Yep. There were so many complaints about her not being open about how sad she is & not addressing the breakup. Now that she has, it's apparently all about the views & one sided. Um... She's not running a charity here & this is not an apology video, so what's wrong with leaving ads on? Of course it's one-sided. How could it have been not one-sided? Tough crowd. It is what it is though.

 

[triesherbest]

Also it’s such a contradiction to claim to be about sustainability but at the same time manipulate people to buy this and buy that, every other post. Excessive consumerism might as well be the opposite of being sustainable. How do these people sleep at night? Lol

 

[openbook1]

I am a few seconds into her video... did she take elocution lessons while with Joe? She sounds like Kate Middleton. She never used to have this airy poshness to her voice prior to him. Lol.

Just finished the vid and a few points I know that have been mentioned before on here...

1. From watching this video I am more than sure that Joe knew he was going to break up with her. I still think he told her the ring was being sent away to be repaired so she wouldn't have it. And he moved they moved in with his brother because he knew he was going to break up with her so didn't want to sign a lease. I wonder if Freddie knew he was going to do it? If so that is quite cruel.

2. Did he maybe not do it in person? Niomi says it happened end of July/beginning of August. They had that pizza night at the end of July and then she was back in Sussex. She says that her friend Charlotte rushed all the way from London to Sussex to be with Niomi... which is what makes me wonder if Joe officially ended it while she was back home?

I imagine this month will open up some fresh wounds for her as it will be a year since they got engaged.

 

[Ramster93]

Kudos to her for finally being able to say the words "break up" and acknowledging her grief. I don't wish heartbreak on anyone, it's an awful thing to go through. When she described being completely blindsided though it reminded me of my ex who claimed the same thing after I ended our long term relationship, despite having expressed how unhappy I was and how I felt the relationship wasn't working on several occasions. Maybe Joe is just really bad at communication, and I know that some breakups happen way out of the blue, but I feel like generally, most of the time the signs are there. We could see it from tiny snippets of their life together. I think she was caught off guard because she doesn't feel like she has any fault in the break up. The timing of the breakup was terrible, but there's no good time to end things. I'd rather someone dump me before getting married/at the altar, than entering a marriage that is doomed from the start because my partner secretly wants out. I hope she gets therapy, I do believe her when she says it was traumatic, but I think an unbiased third party could help her realize how some of her behaviours led to the relationships end. I imagine her immediate circle is just an echo chamber of people saying Joe is an asshole, she's too good for him, etc etc, and that won't help her in the long run.

Agreed. I think it's more that she's bad at listening than him at communicating. She could've just watched some videos that we watched and got a hint that he wasn't "happy happy" all the time the way she insisted/showed.

Yet she still wants us to think she had the perfect healing process down, all so intuitively she just knew honestly it’s all so fake, it’s too much.

Exactly! It's a cycle, isn't it?

"Everything's pahfect!"
*1 month later*
"No, things weren't perfect then. They're perfect now."
*1 month later*
"Actually, things weren't perfect then. They're really perfect now!"

This is what every influencer does. Dimbobs more than others IMO.

 

[CW1994]

Anyone else see on Charlotte's instagram last night that Niomi met her for cocktails INDOORS. Yet again breaking lockdown rules!!

 

[Dillydally]

I've been reading everyone's comments about the video, and have found myself giving the thumbs up to a variety of interpretations. We only have one very limited viewing windkw, so there's no way of knowing who's right and who's wrong. My two cents:
- Niomi overtly states multiple times that she made the video for those in the comments asking her how she healed so quickly. I've seen those comments myself so I believe her when she says that's why she made the video. I think the speculation around timing and how it relates to money is fair, though I don't think that's necessarily true. Niomi has been terrible at capitalising on the breakup, and that's not even mentioning the dire launch of Smart Skin. I'm not sure she's that smart to time this video so perfectly
- I agree with those who find her self-congratulatory "I went into self-healing mode" at about 3 mins a bit cringe
- But I also kinda get what she means. I had the same reaction in my last breakup, and "self-healing mode" is exactly how I described it. But then again, I was in long-term therapy and it was a very intense introspective process. Niomi doesn't speak about it with much depth beyond focussing on herself and "being selfish". I get what she's saying, and I really do believe it's her only way of coping, but I can't assume it's particularly deep. Self-healing for Niomi seems to be journaling, doing nice things for herself, playing at yoga and spreading covid...
- the puddle segment was super fake/cringe
- her actual self-care tips were pretty decent and the sorts of things my therapist would suggest. Journaling, spending time with family and friends (not necessarily in person due to it being a pandemic), finding healthy ways to get back to sleep, etc
- Niomi clearly has an army of support around her. In my experience, that is the most important factor in getting over a trauma, so I can kind of believe she's been OK-ish
- I can also believe she's OK-ish because she's very privileged and only works part time. She has time for this "self-healing mode" and doesn't have the stresses that most of us have
- I agree with those who say her flouncing about London during covid was shitty. Posting about it online was even shittier
- I think that what Joe did was shit, and I think opinions on that come down to personal experiences, so I'm not saying I'm right or wrong on this one. I once had a long-term boyfriend that I met overseas. I knew for a while that things weren't working, though I tried desperately to make it so. I communicated my feelings explicitly. Then we returned to the UK and looking at places to live, and he was talking about moving to where I wanted to. At that point, even though it was hard, I broke up with him because I knew that the deeper we got, the worse it would be for him. I wasn't even sure at the time if it was what I wanted, but the alternative - him uprooting his life for me, only for me to back track on my commitment - was a much shittier thing to do. Joe let this get as far as the entire wedding being booked before ending things, and we have no way of knowing whether he voiced his concerns clearly before that (sure, it sounds like there were signs, but Niomi hasn't said that they actually had an honest conversation). Getting her to move in with his brother was also shitty (IMO) - I doubt that idea was Niomi's
- then again, maybe Joe was honest about everything and Niomi is concealing that fact, and I could be entirely off-base! Again, we don't have all the information
- I didn't get the sense that Niomi was more interested in the wedding than Joe. She was emphasising the wedding to point out how far Joe let things go before ending things, and thus how blindsided she was
- Overall, it was a very conflicting video that was half raw and half smug. Or maybe Niomi is just genuinely in that interim "high from a bad breakup" window where everything feels like some empowering movie montage

[Apologies for any grammar and spelling mistakes]

 

[QueenBW]

Just me or is this irresponsible and gross? ‘I’m so exhausted I’m struggling to get up but I’m forcing myself to do yoga anyway’ wtf?

Her obsessive behavior is starting to show in everything she does, she probably doesn't even notice though.

She probably WAS exhausted. That's what happens when you don't eat enough and over-exercise. Maybe she didn't sleep well, she's probably emotionally drained from trying to appear perfectly over Joe and the engagement even around her family. But... If I'm exhausted, I simply don't work out that day. I take a break. But she can't, because she's clearly got some control issues.

 

[slothella22]

If we forget about Niomi for a second, I think a lot of Joe’s happiness came from his job. He works in the entertainment/events industry. This sector has been absolutely crippled by Coronavirus. It seems to me he’s very much a people person and likes being surrounded by others. When they were still living in London before moving to India, Joe would often be out all day working. He probably thrived in that environment. After loosing his dream job in India and then being locked down with Niomi 24/7 it made him realise it would be a while before the area he works in is going to get back to any sense of normality. I think that really upset him and the fact he probably felt confused about what jobs he could realistically apply for/do during a pandemic. Where as Niomi can work anywhere. I’ve spent a lot of lockdown working from home and I’ve found it so isolating. I miss people so much. I have no doubt Joe felt the same. He probably wanted to go back to London to stay with Freddie because at this point I think it’s clear he’d had enough of being on his own with Niomi and her controlling behaviour over daily runs and food. Then she did it with the flat balcony redecoration and those sad vegan pizzas. Not forgetting the day she’d got drunk in the park with Charlotte whilst he’d been sorting furniture out all day. It’s no wonder he called the whole thing off. He’d had enough of everything.

 

[kalechips]

The audacity of posting about 'overdoing it' when her 'job' is literally just getting free shit sent to her, taking selfies, and going out to brunch. During a global pandemic where so many people with legitimate jobs are spread so thin and burning the candle at both ends just trying to survive. She's the epitome of the spoiled, entitled, vapid, privileged white girl. what an absolute dolt.

 

[LaraQ]

There was some real emotional honesty in that video.My heart went out to her actually.

 

[judgejohndeed]

Seems like Niomi really can’t decide if she wants to go full on luxury beauty or pretend she gives a crap about ethical sustainability stuff. Dior isn’t cruelty free is it? Pick a lane Dimbobs.

 

[BattieHattie]

"Missed you sooo much" in the last, what, 2 weeks you haven't seen each other? Genuinely don't understand why these people even plaster this shit online for everyone to see. Seems like provocation to me at this point.

View attachment 327389

I haven’t seen my best friend since last Christmas. Stfu Niomi

 

[imsorryabtthisacct]

I can't crap on her for the latest video... instead of trying to be perfect, I think she was a lot more honest and clearly the emotion of what happened is still very raw. When she started tearing up at the end... I felt that.

I think her coping mechanism is to try and convince herself that she's "over it" in order to get over it. Like dressing for the job you want. I've definitely done that myself after a break up... a lot of people have. That whole "show him what he's missing" thing.

I absolutely feel for her. Maximizing productivity was how I coped with my last break-up as well. My philosophy was that as broken as I was, I refused to let a guy destroy me further by gaining weight from stress eating, appearing unmotivated at my job, or missing out on important social engagements. However coldblooded I might have appeared, it did allow me to "get over it" faster. It was like a hypnosis. I am still very much broken & sad whenever I think about him, but I'm glad I was very functional throughout this period. Not all of us want to set aside time to wallow in pain.

That bit about trying on wedding dresses 2 days prior to the breakup was so heartbreaking.