littlepup
VIP Member
16wk jabs for us yesterday. I had to do tiny amounts from the syringe into the back corner of her mouth. Takes a good 3–4 mins to get it all in though
- Notice
i’m feeling exactly the same today about my daughter. Really felt guilty for not getting enough 1-2-1 time before baby arrived as i was so tired all the time.Hi everyone coming over here from the pregnancy threads as I just had my baby on SaturdayShe is my second and we have been doing well since the birth, but I have been feeling such mum guilt for my 3 yr old daughter
she loves her new baby sister and hasn’t shown any jealousy towards her but I can’t shake that guilt feeling and it’s getting me a bit down! Can anyone else relate thats went from 1 to 2, is this normal post birth hormones?
But before baby i used to feel guilty when she was always playing by herself and wanted her to have a sibling that hopefully she will be close to.
as mums think we’ll have guilt no matter what
Exactly! Don’t feel bad at al! I hate to say this but to me it comes across as jealousy sometimes... I’m not saying everything is perfect, I really struggled to breastfeed due to his latch and him being severely jaundiced so was struggling to feed. it really got me down. Still bugs me but I just get on with it!Yeh i feel like its meant to be a constant competition over who has it worse and how hard it is. Like i said I know it will change soon but can i not just enjoy the good times without being made to feel bad
I agree with you all. I’ve had a really rough time this time round but mainly because of covid and my dad dying. Even amongst that and a newborn I manage to shower every morning and a bath most evenings. I have a 5 month old and 3 yr old and find quiet moments to myself. It helps I have a husband who despite being pretty useless can be left alone with them both for a little while or helps me by tag teaming them with me!
No and also that it’s not about them. He takes it so personally when she’s horrible to him but doesn’t get that it’s not about him. I think I have an advantage as I work with children. I’ve tried telling him she won’t change unless he does but he doesn’t get it. I spend my life reading about how to parent the toddler and he just thinks she should blindly comply to whatever he tells her and wonders why the butt heads constantly.
WhatABore
VIP Member
This! I've always had this!
Thing is though, it has lasted
Everyone's always like "Don't get used to it" ect ect "it won't last"
But they've always been quite chilled.
Sure there's been phases where they haven't but even with my son, he's well behaved at 8..and even now people are still like "Just wait til this stage.. Just wait til this age"
Why can't you just let people say positive things? Why do you always have to be waiting for the bad times?
Different experience in that she fed a lot but it was for short bursts, anywhere from 15 minutes to 40. I just fed on demand.
With visitors they just need to work around you and baby, don't be pressured
We waited over a week til anyone first met her because I wanted to work out how to feed.
With visitors they just need to work around you and baby, don't be pressured
We waited over a week til anyone first met her because I wanted to work out how to feed.
littlepup
VIP Member
There’s no standard and at only a week or two pp your supply won’t be established so you won’t even have a ‘normal’ for you.
Have a good read up or ask your health visitor but an hour seems a long time to perceiver if all in one go, or did you stop and get restart? Half an hour in the early days then down to 15-20 min sessions is what I was advised. I think it’s something like when the milk stops coming give it another 2 mins.
I have struggled pumping but if I start to stress or look at the pump it will stop coming entirely. Top tips are to cover the pump so you can’t see what’s coming out, try to feel as calm and lovely as possible, look at pics of baby or stay close to them to stimulate the production.
I was told turning it up higher doesn’t mean better/more, just different women respond to different strengths.
You can also massage the breast before hand and during (during squeeze and massage toward the nipple) and/or put a warm compress over before you start.
You might also have a look at the different flange (what a word!) sizes and positioning if you think the pump is ineffective. Not all pumps are made equal, I’ve found different results from the 4 I’ve tried.
And don’t forget not to compare yourself to anyone you see elsewhere. In the very vast majority, the body will regulate so that your baby is getting what they need in the quantity you produce. A smaller amount will be more nutrient/fat dense.
Finally, depending who you’re under now the midwives or health visitor will be able to provide help with breast feeding which would include advice on pumping. There’re also FB groups called ‘mixed up feeding’ and ‘no milk like mama’s’ where you can get peer support and advice
Obvs this is just taken from my own experience and things I’ve read/been told along the way but I’m by no means an expert with all of 4 months experience
x
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Hairraiser
VIP Member
Thank you xxx
Felt weird reading that back
it’s so unexpected but definitely welcome cause of the complications of preeclampsia ! I’m in a side room so hoping I can sleep enough to be recharged for the op xx
Were both actually ok, my blood pressure was sky high and they found high traces of protein in my urine , I didn’t actually feel unwell so I was lucky.
Babys movements have been abit off but its cause I had steroid injections so they said it would make him slightly idle and sleepy. Every so often he gives me a kick! I’m gonna miss him kicking and moving about
I guess it has to end at some point! Il try to update the thread when I’m up too it xx
Completely agree, I know some people use them for supervised naps but I couldn’t guarantee my baby would be supervised. For instance, if I fell asleep during nap time too or just simply wanted to get some housework done, I wouldn’t be able to watch baby like a hawk!
No I don’t think your being silly. Personally I think all grandchildren should be treated equally whatever number they are as it’s just not fair.Ladies, I think this is one of those “am I being unreasonable?” questions. So obviously we’ve not long had a baby, he is our fourth, and it’s definitely true that the more babies you have the fewer cards & gifts you get on their arrival. That doesn’t bother me in general, I don’t expect other people to really bother or be overly interested. However, I have realised that my MIL & FIL didn’t give us a card or a present this time. They are lovely people, great grandparents, and are generous people. They usually just send a card and a little cuddly toy- nothing major (they live 500 miles away) but just a little token. I thought they hadn’t this time and they’d bring it when they came to visit, but they never did. Not even a card. Now my SIL (their daughter) is about to have a baby and she lives elsewhere, and there has already been talk of what they are sending her. So we get nothing at all, and she will. I feel like it’s really unfair and I’m (irrationally?) annoyed that our baby wasn’t really acknowledged by them. Am I being silly?
Dry skin I would maybe pop some moisturiser on, baby acne just leave. Usually starts at 6 weeks and is gone in 2-3 weeksall mine had them, some pretty badly, but they totally disappear
my fil didn’t bother for our second not even seen her, my husband asked him about it last week and the response was he’s over grandkids now (she’s #16) that’s not herfault and it’s not fair.
easier said than done by try not to take it personally
WhatABore
VIP Member
I was worried about it the first week or so. Its got much better now.Thank you so so much
I called mat assessment and the midwife checked me over at home the next day, she said there's no sign of infection and just need to leave it to heal over. She's told me to look out for the signs of infection but it appears to be getting better which is a huge relief!!
Thank you honestly so much, I really needed that. I just find it difficult to talk to my partner at times because he doesn't fully understand and never will know what it's like to so to speak to yous and knowing people are there is always such a big help.
He doesn't nap during the day but is usually asleep by 7.30pm, I think ill start going to bed the same time just to get that little bit extra sleep! No point pottering around the house trying to do wee things when it'll end up messy anyway and just tire myself out haha! Xxx
But I was crying several times a day about silly things, worrying people were leaving me for no reason and everything. It's completely disappeared now.
My partner doesn't get the hormones side of it either so I get how difficult it can be.
He was always asking me what was wrong and if I said I don't know, he'd reply with, "well cheer up then" or "Well there's no need to be upset then"
Hello I’ve got not tips but just wanted to say I’m in the same boat, 5 days pp, cranky toddler, no support. It’s so hard, sending lots of love to you and your family.
Thank you ladies. You’re all right- I should remember that lockdown and slowing down did my toddler no harm and me slowing down won’t do my baby any harm.Ohdon’t feel like you’ve wasted your maternity leave at all!! You are doing more for your little ones than you probably realise. I don’t have any intentions to join baby groups with people I don’t know at the moment. Do you have any friends nearby with children? Or are you close by to family at all?
the fact that you are speakingup about this seems to be good I think. I think there is a lot of pressure on mums (& dads) to have to perform and take kids on amazing days out, it’s a really difficult thing to balance.
She slept through the night last night for the first time and now I feel a little more human and normal so maybe it’s all the tiredness catching up with me.
I did a work meeting yesterday afternoon which went terribly. I’m back to work in September and winding myself up in circles about it as my anxiety is suddenly sky high since my dads death. I think I know in my heart I need a little more support jusy don’t know where to get it. My family are all struggling with my dads death in their own way- 2 sisters haven’t even met my baby yet as they’re so angry that we may have given dad covid and so I’ve really only got my mum who is coming to terms with losing her husband of 50 years.
WhatABore
VIP Member
Yess! The constant leaking is so annoyingI heard about the night sweats but thankfully didn't have them. The worst for me was when my milk came in and the first days of agony. Never felt a sensation like it. Also, the constant leaking was such a pain. Wet clothes, leaking in the shower, bending over and milk dripping
To start with I was sleeping without a top or anything and during night feeds, I'm there to my partner like... Umm can you wipe my stomach.. Its dribbling
And then at one point, I was in the shower, washing, lifted boob up and squirted myself in the face
Hahaha!
Definitelyme
VIP Member
Ahhh so sweet, baby smiles are so pure and beautifulJust got my first proper smiles from baby birdette this morning. Brb just crying
wait until you get giggles. You’ll just about die!He’s not having an anaesthetic, this is what I’m dreading!! He’s got a dilated kidney so need to check what’s going on, they think it could be reflux or it’s not draining properly. We’re basically gonna have to restrain him, my husband said he will do it as I’ll find it too emotional. Thank you, I’ll update as to how it goesIs it every time you lie her down? I don’t know much about reflux, but if you’re concerned maybe speak to GP or HV and ask
Oh it’s so hard when they are in hospital. We’ve not had the same, and not with a young baby, but my son had an operation at 14 months, and a broken leg at 2.5 and having them in is just awful. I don’t know if your lo will be having anaesthetic but if so, be prepared for how hard that is. I found it really heart breaking having to hold the mask on while he screamed, and then hand over his wee limp bodyI properly sobbed. Just to give you a heads up.
I hope it all goes well for him xx
xi had a similar thing yesterday, i said i dont want to go back on the pill and we will use condoms and she was acting like we are 15 and we couldnt be trusted to be carefulOh good luck! We’ve got our 12 week ones tomorrowand then gave me loads of patronising leaflets about contraception incase I didn’t know my options lol.
StrawberryCream
VIP Member
Thank you, she’s at nursery all week but I think I’m going to take her to the park and a cafe at the weekend just the two of us. I’ll probably not like leaving the baby at home but mabye it would be good for my husband too. Hopefully doing something like that with her will make me feel a bit better. I was lying awake last night thinking I need to try and not always talk about the baby to her as I felt I was doing it a lot (which adds to my guilt). I’m so annoyed I feel like this as the main reason for us having another child was to give her a sibling. Hopefully the feeling goes away when my hormones settle down
