New baby and post birth advice #6

[wakametango 2.0]

Does anyone else get annoyed with their partner being so close to them in bed during a night feed, like move over! Breathing on me and on my side.. go awayyyy

 

[Hellofromtheotherside]

I don't think I had any idea how hard it would be going from 1 to 2 children. Eldest is 4, youngest 4 weeks. Omg. He's not at school yet so i don't even have to do school runs, nursery is flexible if he's late.

We have no family nearby and not many friends (god that sounds awful but I didnt grow up here and I didn't really make that many friends in the 5yrs I've lived her).

Husband out of the house 12hrs a day. It feels relentless at the moment. Night feeds etc. I stopped BF and giving formula bottles now. I cried so much over that decision but my MH is better for it. Eldest now has the super cold and is just crying and screaming. Throat infection I think.

I know this will pass and I love our newborn daughter but my god its hard.

It is bloody hard but worth it my little boy turned 2 a few weeks ago and my girl is 4 months in a few days sometimes I feel major mum guilt as he is still a baby himself but I try to have mum/son day once every few weeks after his music class we go to softplay then we get the biggest cake to share in the farm shop (cake makes everything better haha)

 

[Hbirdette]

Does anyone else get annoyed with their partner being so close to them in bed during a night feed, like move over! Breathing on me and on my side.. go awayyyy

I get annoyed when he’s close to me in bed at all

 

[WhatABore]

Does anyone else get annoyed with their partner being so close to them in bed during a night feed, like move over! Breathing on me and on my side.. go awayyyy

I always do
Tbh, I get annoyed with my 3 year old touching me constantly too
Always has to have a foot or something touching me
Or sitting down and she sits as close as possible.

Let me breathe peopleeee

 

[Babyyoda88]

Does anyone else get annoyed with their partner being so close to them in bed during a night feed, like move over! Breathing on me and on my side.. go awayyyy

Not in bed but when I’m breastfeeding the baby and my partner will lean down really slowly to kiss her and his big barnet hair tickles my chest-gives me rage.

The baby is starting to be really smiley

 

[wakametango 2.0]

Not in bed but when I’m breastfeeding the baby and my partner will lean down really slowly to kiss her and his big barnet hair tickles my chest-gives me rage.

The baby is starting to be really smiley

The kisses during night feedsss… nooo leave the giggle monster alone she’ll only start smiling looking for her twin (mr tango) to interact with her!

I’m coincidentally obsessed with Dalmatian print and I’d highly recommend it as a phone case! The contrast is perfect and she smiles at it every time I go to take pics, I call it her best friend!

 

[Tui]

Thanks for the messages of support yesterday ladies. It was a rough day! We got home and then the hospital called and said they’d lost baby’s blood sample so needed us to bring him back for another. His poor little heels are so bruised after the blood sugar testing too! So the dr wasn’t concerned about the pooing (or lack of) yet but he’d dropped to 7lbs from 7lb 11oz so a little more than they’d like and his jaundice levels were high. He didn’t need to go in for phototherapy last night but we were advised to top him up with some formula and are back here now waiting for another blood test. He is still looking quite yellow so not sure what to expect. He’s started weeing like a champ though so just hoping the number 2s follow soon.
Pretty annoyed I haven’t heard a thing from community midwives and no day 5 visit so we’ve had to come back to the hospital for the tests but hey ho. I had him privately (although still within my local NHS Hospital) so I wonder if it’s just an admin glitch but I’ve tried calling them since Thursday as did the private ward and no sign of them.
PS It should be LAW that you are informed going for a number 2 after an episiotomy will feel like giving birth all over again. Someone vaguely mentioned MAYBE wanting to get some laxatives but it was a passing comment. First one was horrendous and now I need to go again and am utterly terrified. What can I buy from a sainsburys local on a Sunday evening to help?!

I ate porridge with prunes every morning which really helped. I had a c section but had a lot of morphine etc in labour and afterwards and had to pointedly ask for laxatives on the ward, the postnatal care was so poor. Lactulose gave me horrendous wind so warning!! Movicol/macrogol/cosmocol much better

Does anyone else get annoyed with their partner being so close to them in bed during a night feed, like move over! Breathing on me and on my side.. go awayyyy

Yeah baby opens his eyes and stares lovingly at my husband while I am just a walking tit

 

[Dipdab]

Does anyone use a swaddle at night for their newborn? One of my girls really loves being cosy and cuddled up. I’ve swaddled her in a muslin for daytime naps but it doesn’t feel very safe for night sleeping?

 

[LilyRose1234]

Does anyone use a swaddle at night for their newborn? One of my girls really loves being cosy and cuddled up. I’ve swaddled her in a muslin for daytime naps but it doesn’t feel very safe for night sleeping?

I used to! I bought loads of the premade swaddle bags and she hated all of them, so I swaddled her using either a cellular blanket or a large thin muslin depending on the room temp (she was born in summer)

 

[I’mThankyou_]

Does anyone use a swaddle at night for their newborn? One of my girls really loves being cosy and cuddled up. I’ve swaddled her in a muslin for daytime naps but it doesn’t feel very safe for night sleeping?

Yeah! We either use the love to dream swaddle bags or a cellular blanket

 

[Greys1324]

Does anyone else get annoyed with their partner being so close to them in bed during a night feed, like move over! Breathing on me and on my side.. go awayyyy

Omg yes!! I’m sure he starts breathing extra loudly too just to annoy me too

 

[LilyRose1234]

Ladies…routines…do you have strict routines eg baby is up at 7, naps at 9 for 1.5 hours in his/her cot, then up at 10.30 etc etc etc? I don’t like the thought of being tied to the house for set times, especially as I’ll be back at work soon enough so it isn’t really feasible, plus she shows no inclination of wanting that. Is it still a routine to say, ok she usually likes to be awake for 2.5-3 hours, so when she starts to exhibit tired cues, I pop her down either in her cot if we’re at home or her pram if we’re out and she can sleep for as long/as little as she likes? Rinse and repeat until bedtime? Honestly, I pride myself on being fairly intelligent but this has me feeling like an idiot on a daily basis

 

[WhatABore]

Does anyone use a swaddle at night for their newborn? One of my girls really loves being cosy and cuddled up. I’ve swaddled her in a muslin for daytime naps but it doesn’t feel very safe for night sleeping?

I bought the swaddle wraps I wouldn't trust myself doing a Muslin

Ladies…routines…do you have strict routines eg baby is up at 7, naps at 9 for 1.5 hours in his/her cot, then up at 10.30 etc etc etc? I don’t like the thought of being tied to the house for set times, especially as I’ll be back at work soon enough so it isn’t really feasible, plus she shows no inclination of wanting that. Is it still a routine to say, ok she usually likes to be awake for 2.5-3 hours, so when she starts to exhibit tired cues, I pop her down either in her cot if we’re at home or her pram if we’re out and she can sleep for as long/as little as she likes? Rinse and repeat until bedtime? Honestly, I pride myself on being fairly intelligent but this has me feeling like an idiot on a daily basis

I just follow their lead.
The only routine we do is bed time and even that, I didn't start until she fell into it herself

Naps during the day are just whenever she's tired

 

[bottombanana]

Ladies…routines…do you have strict routines eg baby is up at 7, naps at 9 for 1.5 hours in his/her cot, then up at 10.30 etc etc etc? I don’t like the thought of being tied to the house for set times, especially as I’ll be back at work soon enough so it isn’t really feasible, plus she shows no inclination of wanting that. Is it still a routine to say, ok she usually likes to be awake for 2.5-3 hours, so when she starts to exhibit tired cues, I pop her down either in her cot if we’re at home or her pram if we’re out and she can sleep for as long/as little as she likes? Rinse and repeat until bedtime? Honestly, I pride myself on being fairly intelligent but this has me feeling like an idiot on a daily basis

I personally am pretty strict with routine (as they get older, I’d say around 5 months) but I think it really depends on you and your lifestyle. It works for me to be strict with routine because I like to know exactly when they’ll nap etc, it helps me feel more in control and know when I’ll get “me time” (I definitely start counting down to nap time by mid-morning). However, I know loads of people who just go with the flow, there’s really no right answer. It’s just what works for you and your family and lifestyle etc.

 

[Fruitgums]

Ladies…routines…do you have strict routines eg baby is up at 7, naps at 9 for 1.5 hours in his/her cot, then up at 10.30 etc etc etc? I don’t like the thought of being tied to the house for set times, especially as I’ll be back at work soon enough so it isn’t really feasible, plus she shows no inclination of wanting that. Is it still a routine to say, ok she usually likes to be awake for 2.5-3 hours, so when she starts to exhibit tired cues, I pop her down either in her cot if we’re at home or her pram if we’re out and she can sleep for as long/as little as she likes? Rinse and repeat until bedtime? Honestly, I pride myself on being fairly intelligent but this has me feeling like an idiot on a daily basis

We defo don't have a set day routine as he's up at different times and some days his wake windows are longer or shorter. When he shows tired cues if we are home will go to the bedroom, get it dark and white noises on and he will nap...usually he feeds to sleep so it's a contact one but that's fine. If we are out i don't really think about it as he falls asleep fine in the car or pram. The scenario l struggle most with is when he's sleepy in others houses, at my parents I just go to one of the bedrooms but at other family he's to nosey to fall asleep in a busy room so I just use it as our excuse to leave but with Christmas coming and long days at others houses starting to think about it as the days will be full on for him so he will need a bit of chill time.

 

[wakametango 2.0]

Ladies…routines…do you have strict routines eg baby is up at 7, naps at 9 for 1.5 hours in his/her cot, then up at 10.30 etc etc etc? I don’t like the thought of being tied to the house for set times, especially as I’ll be back at work soon enough so it isn’t really feasible, plus she shows no inclination of wanting that. Is it still a routine to say, ok she usually likes to be awake for 2.5-3 hours, so when she starts to exhibit tired cues, I pop her down either in her cot if we’re at home or her pram if we’re out and she can sleep for as long/as little as she likes? Rinse and repeat until bedtime? Honestly, I pride myself on being fairly intelligent but this has me feeling like an idiot on a daily basis

Nope, no routine! I feed on demand in the night so the feed times are different each day. She can go from 1-3 hours awake and like you say some days I have errands so she may have an assisted nap in buggy or carrier or some days I may buckle down and practise some self soothing in her basket. Her most predictable sleep times are 1 hour after waking and she will sleep at 5/6 for 1 hour then I do her last feed and settle her for the night. The day time is whatever tbh, she’s only slept 30 mins since 8:30

 

[Crazycatlady18]

I have a fussy one today. Won’t settle being held, won’t settle lying down. Clean, burped, fed (two bottles in an hour ‍) tried a bit of tummy time (hates it) she’s just fussy. It’s the worst guessing game ever

 

[Babyyoda88]

I have a fussy one today. Won’t settle being held, won’t settle lying down. Clean, burped, fed (two bottles in an hour ‍) tried a bit of tummy time (hates it) she’s just fussy. It’s the worst guessing game ever

It is a guessing game isn’t it. My baby’s was giving me these gorgeous big smiles and then spent the next half an hr crying and shouting at me. I didn’t know what to do, she was fed and changed, so I just started singing Christmas songs to her, which just annoyed her more.

 

[Crazycatlady18]

It is a guessing game isn’t it. My baby’s was giving me these gorgeous big smiles and then spent the next half an hr crying and shouting at me. I didn’t know what to do, she was fed and changed, so I just started singing Christmas songs to her, which just annoyed her more.

It’s so frustrating when you don’t know what’s wrong. I just wish they could tell you. Just tried white noise and womb noises and I don’t know about her but it made me sleepy

 

[Babyyoda88]

It’s so frustrating when you don’t know what’s wrong. I just wish they could tell you. Just tried white noise and womb noises and I don’t know about her but it made me sleepy

just now willing her to nap so I can drink my now cold brew.