New baby and post birth advice #58 Where have all the dummies gone?!

[WeepingCassandra]

Thank you @WeepingCassandra !!

I’m just in the baby bubble atm We didn’t think she would be so small - she came at 36 weeks 4 days so she’s just classed as prem, she’s so tiny, 5lb 1oz!!! My sister came round this evening with loads of tiny clothes we were SO unprepared I felt awful. Her first outfit was swinging from her My partner went out on a mad dash on Monday for some tiny babygrows but God I forgot how fast the clothes get used. So we’ve got a few to get us through now My friend also bought us a Mcdonald’s as a birth gift and my sister bought us a pasta bake! Who needs gifts for the baby when you’ve got food!!!

Thanks for making me so welcome

None of baby WCs clothes fitted him when he was born either, he was 37 weeks but we'd been told all along that he was big so we bought just newborn stuff and had to get our friends who had twins a few months before to drop off some tiny baby clothes at the hospital!

McDonalds as a baby gift is very good

 

[shhh1712]

I mean it might be!
But I’ve done FTSE 250 FMCG and you get topped up in what I’ve worked in. Tbf working in HR, I’d be interested to know! Xx

I checked today 🫣 so we do get full pay on top of statutory, but we only get paid hours we work and submitted on timesheets (mine were all full days) and even if we only work 1 hour that counts as a whole day out of 10 kit day allowance. Our company also pays our pension share as this can’t be taken out of statutory pay - guessing this is nationwide not just company policy - so working a KIT day when not receiving SMP could actually ‘look’ worse off as the pension contribution would then come from my pay rather than the company. Again this is possibly the same nationwide?! Working in HR you may have more insight than I do! X

 

[fairylights2000]

How did he get on with the jabs, and with going into nursery while recovering?!

Glad you got the review but bloody hell that's lax of them haha!

He did the morning at nursery and his jabs were in the afternoon so we took him home to rest, fortunately he didn't have any immediate effects. We ended up doing his 1 year jabs across 2 appointments because he'd already caught a nursery cold so the nurse said just do half of them now while he's under the weather and come back for the second half in a month or whatever it was. Poor babies they go through so much!
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None of baby WCs clothes fitted him when he was born either, he was 37 weeks but we'd been told all along that he was big so we bought just newborn stuff and had to get our friends who had twins a few months before to drop off some tiny baby clothes at the hospital!

McDonalds as a baby gift is very good

Ah I had a similar experience. Baby L was also 37 weeks and my MIL grabbed us whatever clothes were to hand (I hadn't packed anything ) so in hospital half the time he was in massive droopy baby grows 🥹 we actually only had about 3 that properly fitted him until he grew a little bit. Oh I miss my tiny skinny little newborn!

 

[loveanatter]

I checked today 🫣 so we do get full pay on top of statutory, but we only get paid hours we work and submitted on timesheets (mine were all full days) and even if we only work 1 hour that counts as a whole day out of 10 kit day allowance. Our company also pays our pension share as this can’t be taken out of statutory pay - guessing this is nationwide not just company policy - so working a KIT day when not receiving SMP could actually ‘look’ worse off as the pension contribution would then come from my pay rather than the company. Again this is possibly the same nationwide?! Working in HR you may have more insight than I do! X

No this all makes sense! Where I am, you pretty much get half a day for 2 hours and more than that you get a full day, but that’s meant to be a way to encourage KIT days!
And yes, when you’re not getting paid (where I’ve been anyway) the company pay your company pension contributions on maternity but once you’re paid, it goes back to you paying them!
It’s alwaysssss interesting to hear xxx
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None of baby WCs clothes fitted him when he was born either, he was 37 weeks but we'd been told all along that he was big so we bought just newborn stuff and had to get our friends who had twins a few months before to drop off some tiny baby clothes at the hospital!

McDonalds as a baby gift is very good

Congratulations!!!
Baby sizes is a minefield - my elder two were 8oz+ and my 3rd was 7lb bang on. So we didn’t bother buying newborn because 8lb+ is too big! My husband also had to go out and buy newborn when we were home
He’s 15 months now and still only in 6-9!!!! Definitely agree the best gifts are food - I buy cook meals if my friends are local and just eat vouchers if they aren’t!!!
Enjoy your baby bubble

 

[Lechat]

Thank you @WeepingCassandra !!

I’m just in the baby bubble atm We didn’t think she would be so small - she came at 36 weeks 4 days so she’s just classed as prem, she’s so tiny, 5lb 1oz!!! My sister came round this evening with loads of tiny clothes we were SO unprepared I felt awful. Her first outfit was swinging from her My partner went out on a mad dash on Monday for some tiny babygrows but God I forgot how fast the clothes get used. So we’ve got a few to get us through now My friend also bought us a Mcdonald’s as a birth gift and my sister bought us a pasta bake! Who needs gifts for the baby when you’ve got food!!!

Thanks for making me so welcome

Congrats Watermelon!!
My baby arrived end of April, a week before his due date. He was 6lb 7, so also everything was too big and husband had to buy some emergency baby gros from Sainsbury’s!
Nearly two weeks on he’s starting to chunk out and fill the baby gros and im thinking he might not be in them much longer now
Your sister and friend are amazing, being bought food is the best gift
I’m learning a lot from the thread and great to see some other new mums on here too

 

[watermelon sugar]

Newborn sleep deprivation is hilarious - just been feeding baby Watermelon and my fella rolled over in his sleep and went ‘I am Groot … haha … I ! Am ! Groot!’ and carried on snoring away

 

[WotsitG1]

Baby wotsit has infected chickenpox. He will not go to sleep in his cot, I manage to get half an hour out of him and he’s back up, rock him back to sleep back in cot and back awake. Starting to feel desperate. In the day he won’t let me put him down at all. Never seen him this poorly

 

[easyliketuesdayafternoon]

Newborn sleep deprivation is hilarious - just been feeding baby Watermelon and my fella rolled over in his sleep and went ‘I am Groot … haha … I ! Am ! Groot!’ and carried on snoring away

God that's just reminded me of some of the absolute rubbish we used to come out with when sleep deprived.

Me: who looks after him at night because I can't, I don't have a boat

 

[raspberryjuice]

Just poking my head in to say hi. Baby Raspberry was born yesterday and he’s a little dream

Does anyone have any tips on getting baby to suck? We had it yesterday but with so many interfering hca’s and midwives overnight it’s like he’s forgotten how to do it. He can latch but he will suck once or twice and just sit there. Getting really frustrated now because we’ve had to syringe colostrum for him when yesterday he was feeding fine

 

[WotsitG1]

When your babies over 1 are poorly and won’t eat solids, do you offer more milk again?
Prob sounds very daft

 

[opintionatedperson]

Just poking my head in to say hi. Baby Raspberry was born yesterday and he’s a little dream

Does anyone have any tips on getting baby to suck? We had it yesterday but with so many interfering hca’s and midwives overnight it’s like he’s forgotten how to do it. He can latch but he will suck once or twice and just sit there. Getting really frustrated now because we’ve had to syringe colostrum for him when yesterday he was feeding fine

He could just be tired ... They say a dummy helps but it might interfere with latching so it's hard to know what to do .. we had issues with my little person and ended up on a nose drip for two days . They did use a dummy but they always let me try breast first . Baby will get there it's bad a busy day being born

 

[Ro98]

Just poking my head in to say hi. Baby Raspberry was born yesterday and he’s a little dream

Does anyone have any tips on getting baby to suck? We had it yesterday but with so many interfering hca’s and midwives overnight it’s like he’s forgotten how to do it. He can latch but he will suck once or twice and just sit there. Getting really frustrated now because we’ve had to syringe colostrum for him when yesterday he was feeding fine

probably sounds silly as I’m sure you are but have you been stripping him down to nappy to feed? We had to do this and gentle wipe his face with a warm ish flannel before each feed just to wake him a little (I was told it can be common for them to be quite sleepy after birth) regardless of section or vaginal. I also found offering a clean pinky finger too or dummy just to encourage the sucking before putting him on me or the bottle helped a bit.

 

[Onepotatotwopotato]

Just poking my head in to say hi. Baby Raspberry was born yesterday and he’s a little dream

Does anyone have any tips on getting baby to suck? We had it yesterday but with so many interfering hca’s and midwives overnight it’s like he’s forgotten how to do it. He can latch but he will suck once or twice and just sit there. Getting really frustrated now because we’ve had to syringe colostrum for him when yesterday he was feeding fine

You could try hand expressing before latching him, make it a bit easier for him

 

[raspberryjuice]

We’ve tried the hand expressing and then syringing a bit first, tried hand expressing to get some droplets there for him to taste and be more interested and tried the skin to skin and finger but not the flannel to wake him up. He can latch and starts to suck but after literally 2 sucks he’s just looking around still latched but not sucking yesterday he was feeding like a dream and then they’ve thrown so many techniques at him that aren’t how we were doing it yesterday that we’re both confused and frazzled now. Yesterday we were getting loads of wet and dirty nappies so it was obviously working and today it’s like he’s completely forgotten how because they spent half the night telling me to hold him differently.

 

[Nfj]

We’ve tried the hand expressing and then syringing a bit first, tried hand expressing to get some droplets there for him to taste and be more interested and tried the skin to skin and finger but not the flannel to wake him up. He can latch and starts to suck but after literally 2 sucks he’s just looking around still latched but not sucking yesterday he was feeding like a dream and then they’ve thrown so many techniques at him that aren’t how we were doing it yesterday that we’re both confused and frazzled now. Yesterday we were getting loads of wet and dirty nappies so it was obviously working and today it’s like he’s completely forgotten how because they spent half the night telling me to hold him differently.

Can you do lots of skin to skin even when not feeding. Just have him on your chest/ boobs out etc? Lots of other good tips up above too. I’d ignore all the midwives and HCAs and just do what’s comfortable for you!

 

[aggytha]

We’ve tried the hand expressing and then syringing a bit first, tried hand expressing to get some droplets there for him to taste and be more interested and tried the skin to skin and finger but not the flannel to wake him up. He can latch and starts to suck but after literally 2 sucks he’s just looking around still latched but not sucking yesterday he was feeding like a dream and then they’ve thrown so many techniques at him that aren’t how we were doing it yesterday that we’re both confused and frazzled now. Yesterday we were getting loads of wet and dirty nappies so it was obviously working and today it’s like he’s completely forgotten how because they spent half the night telling me to hold him differently.

Lots of skin to skin and rub/wiggle his feet whilst he’s feeding! Sounds silly but if he is a bit sleepy it will keep him awake and focused on sucking.

has he been checked for tongue tie?

 

[opintionatedperson]

We’ve tried the hand expressing and then syringing a bit first, tried hand expressing to get some droplets there for him to taste and be more interested and tried the skin to skin and finger but not the flannel to wake him up. He can latch and starts to suck but after literally 2 sucks he’s just looking around still latched but not sucking yesterday he was feeding like a dream and then they’ve thrown so many techniques at him that aren’t how we were doing it yesterday that we’re both confused and frazzled now. Yesterday we were getting loads of wet and dirty nappies so it was obviously working and today it’s like he’s completely forgotten how because they spent half the night telling me to hold him differently.

It's so hard when the staff are throwing out different suggestions ...we had this issue too so I know exactly how it feels... Remember their stomach is so small so they don't need that much the first few days , he will get there this is not going to be helpful as I know it's very stressful but babies sense stress if your stressed they'll be stressed if you can relax if can help . But I know myself j didn't start chilling out for a few weeks , it's so frustrating as you know he can do it .

 

[raspberryjuice]

Yeah he’s been checked for tongue tie and we’ve done skin to skin most of today. He’s been in my top since about 6am and he roots and latches he just won’t stay sucking I’ll try the feet tickles we haven’t done that yet! It’s just so frustrating that yesterday he was fine but because I had him nuzzled in my arm and feeding that way they started interfering telling me I had to hold him by the neck and in the rugby ball position and now he’s completely lost it. I just can’t wait to get home and do it our own way. I’ve had to give him a a pre made bottle now just to get something in him and they’re already starting to push formula or expressing then bottle feeding. It’s like they’ve written him off even tho he had it nailed yesterday

 

[Lechat]

I feel like every midwife and infant feeding support group has told me different things to do / try with bf. It’s really hard as all the videos show eargerly latching babies. Baby Chat won’t open his mouth wide enough when latching and gets v stressed out. We’ve got a tongue referral and I’m using nipple shields and formula in the meantime. I’ve pumped a bit as well, but I don’t get loads out. I feel really guilty about it as I wanted to bf but the whole thing now makes me anxious as I just can’t be sure he’s taking enough milk on if I just bf him alone. All I can say is I don’t think there’s enough support at all.

 

[aggytha]

Yeah he’s been checked for tongue tie and we’ve done skin to skin most of today. He’s been in my top since about 6am and he roots and latches he just won’t stay sucking I’ll try the feet tickles we haven’t done that yet! It’s just so frustrating that yesterday he was fine but because I had him nuzzled in my arm and feeding that way they started interfering telling me I had to hold him by the neck and in the rugby ball position and now he’s completely lost it. I just can’t wait to get home and do it our own way. I’ve had to give him a a pre made bottle now just to get something in him and they’re already starting to push formula or expressing then bottle feeding. It’s like they’ve written him off even tho he had it nailed yesterday

rugby ball position works for some but I hated it!! Also the neck holding thing is weird and didn’t work for me either. Most importantly, get YOURSELF comfortable and bring baby to you. Don’t be tempted to bend your back or contort your body in weird positions. Use as many pillows as you need. Hold him how you feel comfortable. Have you tried feeding him in a more laid back position?

please do not be disheartened, it’s such early days and it took me 4 months to feel like I actually knew what I was doing when I started breastfeeding! You’re doing great!

when you are home you can also reach out to The Breastfeeding Network who are fantastic and have a free helpline or messaging service. They also run volunteer led support groups and can help with positioning etc.

Find Breastfeeding support - The Breastfeeding Network

The National Breastfeeding Helpline is open 24 hours a day every single day of the year, offering non-judgemental, evidence based, friendly breastfeeding support and information to anyone in the UK who needs it.

www.breastfeedingnetwork.org.uk