This isn't really specifically baby related but wondered if you helpful mums have any advice please.
I'm verging on leaving my partner because I'm just so unhappy. I've walked out 3 times in the last couple of weeks alone because it's just been too much for me.
It's really hard to say why I feel like this as on the face of it all the reasons I give for why I'm unhappy are minor. But I think I'm at the point of having so much built up anger and resentment towards him that I can't see a way through. Every time we get to this breaking point he says we need to try harder, but I don't know what we are supposed to do.
I think a lot of it has to do with the "mental load" of having to be the primary carer for the baby (and dog) and running the household. But some of the bigger "chores" like cooking and laundry I actually somewhat enjoy doing as it gives me headspace. Also I'm a total perfectionist so I really struggle when things aren't done the way I would do them (I realise this is my problem not something he is doing wrong).
The resentment partly comes from how much I feel I have given up for us. I sold my house last year and moved into his, in a fairly rural location and into a house that needed a fair bit of work doing to it. I moved here on the promise that the work would get done and we'd find somewhere together. It took over a year to get the work finished and then I still had to push him to get the house on the market. Now the house is sold and we are struggling to find somewhere to move to (not helped by interfering in-laws). So we face having to rent somewhere and moving house twice, which scares the life out of me. With how our relationship is I'm really hesitant to go through with all this and feel like it would be easier to have a clean break now and I can find another home for me and baby.
This obviously isn't an easy option as it's me that has to start again with a house etc, but I just don't know what else to do. I think the only reason he wants us to keep trying is so we are a family for our baby but I don't think it's fair to sacrifice my happiness for that, or maybe I'm just being selfish.
Sorry for all the waffle. I guess I'm just asking if anyone has any advice for getting over anger and resentment with a partner?
I am so sorry things are so rubbish right now. I think it’s true to say a lot of us have experienced the same sort of feelings, and feeling alone and undervalued is just so hard to deal with on a daily basis. It wears you down. It isn’t always big things, but rather death by a thousand paper cuts.
I think the thing you need to think on is whether this is a “for now” problem, something that is wrong because of the current situation, or whether it’s symptomatic of problems in the relationship as a whole. In 5 years when baby is bigger, and the demands on you aren’t quite as all encompassing as they are now, do you think you and your partner will still be happy together?
Many years ago I struggled to see how my marriage could continue. I felt like you do now. It was a really rough time, and I don’t even remember what happened to change it. But for me it was a “at the time” problem. I was overworked, overwhelmed, exhausted and not getting the help I needed. I also struggle with perfectionism, and the overwhelm that brings to me, and sometimes I understand my husband can “do no right” even if he helps out. But at the end of the day, our relationship was strained because of the season of life we were in, and when that passed, so did the strain.
Sorry, that’s probably not much helpx
I don’t think I’m doing anything wrong, he’s a content baby and I’d never deliberately make him cold. 
