New baby and post birth advice #3

[Chickenandgravy]

If you tell me where you are I will be right over to snuggle that precious girl all up how adorable is she?!?

ETA: just realised that could have come across really scary I am not stalking you nor planning to jump out of a bush and snuggle your daughter

Feel free to come up to Scotland and steal her for a couple days so I can get a 12 hour sleep

Awwww how cute my little pudding is cute but very loud haha it is hard isn’t it to know what’s right or wrong but you’ve made me feel better don’t think it helps my stitches are killing me today and I’ve got a gaping hole in my mouth from where my tooth just fell out. Maybe she is over tired but honestly she sleeps like a dream all day. Think I’ll try a bath tomorrow again x

I always think everything seems so much worse at night too something that you could easily deal with during the day seems so daunting at night, for me anyway!

 

[Easilyannoyed]

Feel free to come up to Scotland and steal her for a couple days so I can get a 12 hour sleep


I always think everything seems so much worse at night too something that you could easily deal with during the day seems so daunting at night, for me anyway!

I’d be happy with three

 

[Chickenandgravy]

I’d be happy with three

It's only been the last week or so she's slept through the night (she's 9 weeks) so there's still hope for you yet

 

[Easilyannoyed]

Feel free to come up to Scotland and steal her for a couple days so I can get a 12 hour sleep


I always think everything seems so much worse at night too something that you could easily deal with during the day seems so daunting at night, for me anyway!

This this this yes at night it feels awful I am so chill in the day on my own if my fiancé goes out to do errands for me then night time comes and I feel tit x

 

[WhatABore]

Night time is when I struggle with patience.
Not in an angry sense really but emotionally.
I'm patient in everything else regarding parenting.
But when I want to sleep/need sleep and baby won't, I get so frustrated and I just sit and cry
Anything else, I can cope with completely.
Constant crying throughout the day, anything.
But that at night? Nooope

Everleigh keeps waking for a bottle at around 3am and will not go back to sleep until 6ish when she passes out again. But then my 3 year old gets up at 7. So I can't go back to sleep.
So most days this week, I've been awake since 3am

 

[Easilyannoyed]

Night time is when I struggle with patience.
Not in an angry sense really but emotionally.
I'm patient in everything else regarding parenting.
But when I want to sleep/need sleep and baby won't, I get so frustrated and I just sit and cry
Anything else, I can cope with completely.
Constant crying throughout the day, anything.
But that at night? Nooope

Everleigh keeps waking for a bottle at around 3am and will not go back to sleep until 6ish when she passes out again. But then my 3 year old gets up at 7. So I can't go back to sleep.
So most days this week, I've been awake since 3am

My baby is asleep I’m still awake my partner has my bleeping pillow and I’m freezing oh and I forgot to tumble dry the bed cover so tonight we have only the bottom sheet and pillow cases I really struggle at night you’re not on your own x

 

[Hairraiser]

My baby is asleep I’m still awake my partner has my bleeping pillow and I’m freezing oh and I forgot to tumble dry the bed cover so tonight we have only the bottom sheet and pillow cases I really struggle at night you’re not on your own x

I’m 7 months in & can totally remember these days like they were yesterday. The first few weeks I was so anxious but only at night time! So odd, as during the day I felt confident, taking baby out in his pushchair, feeding when he needed it, changing nappies etc. Don’t get me wrong, it was hard adjusting to my new role but I certainly felt like I was doing ok! Then bam, soon as we eaten tea, I’d start crying. Worried that I wouldn’t wake up for him if he cried, he’d soak the cot and I wouldn’t know, he’d stop breathing and I wouldn’t know. Gosh I remember feeling so anxious at one point I thought I was having a heart attack, my chest felt so tight! Plus, I found the darkness quite eery, I’d been so used to the hospital noises at night & knowing I had help whenever that being just the two of us with him at night was so scary, so I can totally sympathise! The only thing that helped me was watching old series of love island, i felt invested in other people’s lives for a moment while baby slept and I could switch off. It was nice!
Just know that you’re not alone in these feelings, and it does get better! I’m sure you’ve been told that many times, I know I did. But it’s so true, things start to become more natural, and you’ll even start to look forward to the nighttime routine, it’ll give you a little bit of me time while baby is happily asleep. Even if it’s just scrolling through your phone in bed, it’s a chance to rest ready to do it all again tomorrow. But I would like to add, god forbid if your feelings don’t start to get better please go & speak to someone, there is absolutely no shame in it, it speaks volumes as a mother if you notice you are struggling & need help, everything you do is for your little bundle of beautiful ness I’m sure!
I have recently reached out for support (had a traumatic birth, suffering ptsd) and it’s the best thing I did, as now I have the appropriate people keeping an eye on me and making sure that my boy has a healthy mum. I’m really shocked at how much the ptsd has affected me not only mentally but physically too, I get horrendous headaches at times that can render me useless & I have to rely on his dad but I know he’s in safe hands!
Just know that we’re all here for you if you need us

 

[wakametango]

My baby is asleep I’m still awake my partner has my bleeping pillow and I’m freezing oh and I forgot to tumble dry the bed cover so tonight we have only the bottom sheet and pillow cases I really struggle at night you’re not on your own x

I hate the night too, I think it goes against all our instincts to be up and awake and having a crying baby doesn’t help.
I feel terrible as even in the day, as she begins to stir bad I fell dred/anxiety that the whole feeding process is happening again.

my 4 week old girl takes nearly two hours to finish 120ml which includes burping. She falls asleep after every 30ml or so, so I need to put her down, which she hates, to wake her up just get her more into her. I may need to settle her to sleep after which can take 40 mins then it’s ready for next feed? I’m really confused by it all to be honest. I will cha he teat tomorrow but changed formula yesterday and didn’t want to change two things at once. I do paced feeding but it’s so slow I really hate it.
She’s just fallen asleep after 40ml so I’m letting her stay asleep to see what happens

 

[orange club biscuit]

I feel you all on the night time anxiety. I am starting to dread evenings and bedtime as it’s just such a battle and she refuses to go to sleep unless she’s on one of us. Then transferring her to her cot takes ages and requires the patience and skilll of a bomb disposal expert - if she wakes up I have to start aaaall over again and it can take hours. most nights I am seeing every hour on the clock and sometimes no sleep at all from her first wake!

I’ve been sort of OK so far but yesterday my husband went away for work and I just cried because I felt so guilty that I couldn’t cope I know it’s just a phase but it feels like we’re such a long way off things being better!

@Easilyannoyed also on the one poo a day stage here!

 

[wakametango]

I feel you all on the night time anxiety. I am starting to dread evenings and bedtime as it’s just such a battle and she refuses to go to sleep unless she’s on one of us. Then transferring her to her cot takes ages and requires the patience and skilll of a bomb disposal expert - if she wakes up I have to start aaaall over again and it can take hours. most nights I am seeing every hour on the clock and sometimes no sleep at all from her first wake!

I’ve been sort of OK so far but yesterday my husband went away for work and I just cried because I felt so guilty that I couldn’t cope I know it’s just a phase but it feels like we’re such a long way off things being better!

@Easilyannoyed also on the one poo a day stage here!

Same about falling asleep on us. Yesterday I tried putting her in the Moses basket and she woke so many times in the end she stayed awake which defeated the whole point, it’s as if she was saying well you’re the one that keeps waking me so I may aswell stay awake now

 

[Chickenandgravy]

Anyone else dealt with cradle cap? My HV said rub some olive oil on it, leave it overnight, wash it off and use baby conditioner to stop it coming back (she's quite old school) but reading online a lot of people say avoid olive oil as its not good for their skin. Does anyone else have any other suggestions?

 

[WhatABore]

Anyone else dealt with cradle cap? My HV said rub some olive oil on it, leave it overnight, wash it off and use baby conditioner to stop it coming back (she's quite old school) but reading online a lot of people say avoid olive oil as its not good for their skin. Does anyone else have any other suggestions?

Mine had cradle cap. First time I'd dealt with it.
But I just left it to go by itself.

I know the same brand that do the dentinox do a cradle cap shampoo thing. Don't know if it's any good though. There's always only a couple left on the shelf. So I'd imagine so

 

[Chickenandgravy]

Mine had cradle cap. First time I'd dealt with it.
But I just left it to go by itself.

I know the same brand that do the dentinox do a cradle cap shampoo thing. Don't know if it's any good though. There's always only a couple left on the shelf. So I'd imagine so

Thanks, I'll have a wee look

 

[mg89]

Holy tit where are you based?! 915!!! We are in the Midlands so not the most expensive but wow. Yep we’ve opened up one of those accounts so the government pay in 20% which does help a little.
aww bless you, it’s a bloodyemotional rollercoaster isn’t it. How old will Your baba be when you’re back at work?

We are based on North London, the 20% will definitely be welcomed and helpful!! He will be 9.5 months!

oh I did this yesterday. Pringle crumbs and melted chocolate on my little one! I felt terrible.

During those witching hours we used to have baby in the sling while we ate. My partner dropped curry on his head one day and he had an orange stain on his head for days! Many bits of food were dropped down in those days.

Thanks, I'll have a wee look

Kokoso is a lovely brand too, they do a scalp cream that cleared up a really persistent patch of dry skin my baby had.

 

[Babyyoda88]

Hi everyone, I feel like I can finally move over to this thread now by baby girl is home and out of NICU. The times I stayed with her in hospital and last night (first night at home) we can’t put her down to sleep she’ll only sleep on us. I don’t know if one of the reasons is because her next to me crib feels cold to touch (even though the room temperature is correct) can anyone recommend a heat pad or something and has anyone used one before with success?

 

[WhatABore]

Hi everyone, I feel like I can finally move over to this thread now by baby girl is home and out of NICU. The times I stayed with her in hospital and last night (first night at home) we can’t put her down to sleep she’ll only sleep on us. I don’t know if one of the reasons is because her next to me crib feels cold to touch (even though the room temperature is correct) can anyone recommend a heat pad or something and has anyone used one before with success?

I have no suggestions for you apart from you're not alone with it.
It seems to be a stage they all go through. I think 99% of us on here have had the same

Have you got a hot water bottle you could pop in the cot before you put her in, just to try it first?

 

[LilyRose1234]

Anyone else dealt with cradle cap? My HV said rub some olive oil on it, leave it overnight, wash it off and use baby conditioner to stop it coming back (she's quite old school) but reading online a lot of people say avoid olive oil as its not good for their skin. Does anyone else have any other suggestions?

Vaseline - literally cleared it up overnight!

 

[Babyyoda88]

I have no suggestions for you apart from you're not alone with it.
It seems to be a stage they all go through. I think 99% of us on here have had the same

Have you got a hot water bottle you could pop in the cot before you put her in, just to try it first?

Thank you!

How long did you find they went through this stage for? She is 37+5 today. I haven’t got a hot water bottle but I couldn’t get one and test it out. It might not work but for some reason the room temp is correct and her mattress feels cold.

 

[Easilyannoyed]

I’m 7 months in & can totally remember these days like they were yesterday. The first few weeks I was so anxious but only at night time! So odd, as during the day I felt confident, taking baby out in his pushchair, feeding when he needed it, changing nappies etc. Don’t get me wrong, it was hard adjusting to my new role but I certainly felt like I was doing ok! Then bam, soon as we eaten tea, I’d start crying. Worried that I wouldn’t wake up for him if he cried, he’d soak the cot and I wouldn’t know, he’d stop breathing and I wouldn’t know. Gosh I remember feeling so anxious at one point I thought I was having a heart attack, my chest felt so tight! Plus, I found the darkness quite eery, I’d been so used to the hospital noises at night & knowing I had help whenever that being just the two of us with him at night was so scary, so I can totally sympathise! The only thing that helped me was watching old series of love island, i felt invested in other people’s lives for a moment while baby slept and I could switch off. It was nice!
Just know that you’re not alone in these feelings, and it does get better! I’m sure you’ve been told that many times, I know I did. But it’s so true, things start to become more natural, and you’ll even start to look forward to the nighttime routine, it’ll give you a little bit of me time while baby is happily asleep. Even if it’s just scrolling through your phone in bed, it’s a chance to rest ready to do it all again tomorrow. But I would like to add, god forbid if your feelings don’t start to get better please go & speak to someone, there is absolutely no shame in it, it speaks volumes as a mother if you notice you are struggling & need help, everything you do is for your little bundle of beautiful ness I’m sure!
I have recently reached out for support (had a traumatic birth, suffering ptsd) and it’s the best thing I did, as now I have the appropriate people keeping an eye on me and making sure that my boy has a healthy mum. I’m really shocked at how much the ptsd has affected me not only mentally but physically too, I get horrendous headaches at times that can render me useless & I have to rely on his dad but I know he’s in safe hands!
Just know that we’re all here for you if you need us

I feel I had a traumatic time too and for the first week I have re lived it and keep feeling the she sensation from my stitches being touched like tingling I am getting better each day and I have spoke to my partner about it and he has been fab but honestly I do see how this could of spiraled if I haven’t talked about it thank you for your kind message it’s like you can read my mind because I am experiencing all of what you have described at night in the day I’m super woman xx

 

[Hbirdette]

Anyone else dealt with cradle cap? My HV said rub some olive oil on it, leave it overnight, wash it off and use baby conditioner to stop it coming back (she's quite old school) but reading online a lot of people say avoid olive oil as its not good for their skin. Does anyone else have any other suggestions?

I can second kokoso for cradle cap, and dribble rash and in general a really good moisturiser!