New baby and post birth advice #3

[Definitelyme]

I'm looking at highchairs and so many people recommend the ikea one as its much easier to clean etc. The cushion insert for it only goes around the back and sides, is it best to try get one that's a cushion on the seat too?

I think in all instances it’s actually better for a wee one to not sit on a cushioned surface, but a more solid one. If there is a bit of give in the surface it’s harder for them to sit up properly and the squidginess of the cushion changes and they are constantly then having to readjust. All of mine have gone in to the IKEA one and never had an issue

 

[OIM]

That’s reassuring to hear, thank you.
How is baby, and you? Have they got any answers? I can’t even imagine how worrying it must be.

The drs aren’t saying much but one of the nurses reckon she’s getting over bronchiolitis. She has a hacking cough but no infection markers in her blood and chest is clear. She reckons the congestion is what’s stopping her feeding. She pulled her feeding tube out at about 4pm and they’re now letting me try feeding her by bottle overnight but if she doesn’t feed well the tube is going back in.

 

[LilyRose1234]

I’ve recently discovered Hey Bear and it’s saved my life makes such a difference having that free time to get stuff done without baby clinging to you! My MIL looked after LO yesterday afternoon and I still had dancing vegetables on the TV in the background for a good 30 mins after she’d left

I like the one with classical music, makes me feel like it’s slightly better for her quite often half an hour has passed while she’s feeding/asleep and I realise I’m still watching dancing fruits - glad it’s not just me

 

[Hbirdette]

Speaking of sleep.... I don’t get why sometimes it’s stupidly easy to put baby to sleep at night and others it’s like wtf am I doing wrong here thankfully tonight was an easy night.

 

[mg89]

Hi everyone, not sure if people remember me from dipping in and out of the pregnancy thread but thought I’d hop in here (and hopefully check back as much as I can but things are tough.... see below lol)

My son is 13 weeks old, has been diagnosed with CMPA since week 8, and is on Neocate LCP formula. He’s also got acid reflux and is on omeprozole since week 6.

Basicslly, he does NOT stop crying. He winges from the minute he opens his eyes in the morning until bedtime. He fights his sleep during the day like a MF. Today he’s had a wake window of SIX hours and has been screaming and screaming in frustration because he’s so overtired.

I’m at witts end. I spend my daylight hours fighting with a 3 month old to sleep/ calm him down etc. I dread the day time from the second I wake up. He cries. And im not joking either. I sometimes can’t pick him up or put him down without a crescendo.

My husband is away at work and won’t be back for another 4 weeks and I’m going mad. Health visitor won’t help, GP just keeps saying “it’s colic” (fucking sick of hearing that word), and I’ve not been able to get a paediatric appointment at the hospital for another 2 weeks.

i admit I do give him the odd dose of calpol to try and get him to take his naps in the day, but 9 times out of 10 he only falls asleep after 2+ hours of howling in my face and then passes out exhausted in my arms. I can’t put him down for a sleep because he jolts awake within seconds and the crying starts again.

He’s now sleeping in bed with me at night (safely) and that’s the only way he will sleep longer than 15 minutes.

Could This be part of his CMPA? I just don’t know. He’s my first, and I’ve never known a baby fight sleep like him. He’s just spent 45 minutes kicking and swinging his arms about screaming in frustration because he’s so tired. His little face is swollen with tiredness.

I just can’t cope :-(

As I said above I’ll try and check this thread as much as I can to keep up with you all but my days are spent either fighting with him or crying myself haha.... happy times!

That sounds so tough.. my understanding is that neocate is soy free. I had `a very similar experience with my little one in the early days, he cried for the first 4 months of his life and so did I. What dosage is he on with the omeprazole? They can have up to 2mg per kg of their weight.He may need a dose increase. I despise the colic thing too, I really believe that there's something that causes the colic crying and it isn't just random crying. Have you tried taking videos of him when he's really bad? I know it's awful but it helped my case. I also tracked every ounce of sleep and milk intake and presented this to them. Have you been referred to dietician also?

Have you got a sling? I remember during those days I was too proud to allow my mum to take him for a few hours, even though I was at breaking point. If you have someone that would take him for a bit, please take that chance. You're doing great and you will get to the bottom of it. I hope the paediatrician can be of more help!

 

[Icbaaaa]

How is your oh still breathing after saying you need to help more with the kids absolute nerve of him!!! There is something quite satisfying about seeing them struggle a bit doing what we do every day (or maybe I’m a sicko?!) but him being so mean to you isn’t on

Honestly I'm gobsmacked, just makes me feel like shit when he says stupid comments like that. I have the kids myself majority of the week due to his shifts, do the nursery runs, all the housework and washings etc. This week he's off so I've been able to get stuff done around the house/take shit loads to the skip and he makes me feel bad by saying that? Men honestly, arseholes

 

[wakametango]

In my head I'm like.. Do you know how expensive this stuff is?!

Is it okay I’m annoyed she never really took to breastfeeding and now I’m stuck buying formula!? Pumping didn’t work either

 

[littlepup]

We had most success with ‘wonky winding’ and tipping her back then up or tilting her upper body around in circles sitting up. Still she suffered terribly though. I think their little systems just aren’t up to speed yet no matter what you do to help. For farts jiggling her bum at the hips worked wonders but she’d still never be able to shift it all then she just got better as she grew I think.

 

[BattleAxing]

Gadgets - Keep limited. Most are gimmicks, one use wonders and often make things more complicated than not. Save your money.

Gifts - people love buying new born baby clothes and you end up with more than you need. For me I much preferred dressing my newborns in the clothes that I had I purchased, spent months fondling them and imagining them in. Most outfits people bought my child got one wear for a photograph, which I would often go out of my way to take. If people want to buy clothes specify you would like 6 months onward. This is weaning age and where clothes need to be plentiful.

Clothes - stay practical! Can't stress enough although frilly dresses, headbands, mini trainers and denim two pieces look cool. I found were a waste of money and time, had safety issues or completely impractical. With my last child, I saw sense and opted for onesies. There are some really cool ones these days. I think newborns look better in onesies anyway.

Batch cook or stock up on quick food/microwables! Or if someone asks you if you need any help, take them up on the offer and ask them to make you a pot of grub.

Put away any ornate/decorative/nick nack pieces and things you don't use, clothes you know you won't wear for a while, just put it all away. Keep a BLANK house, almost like you're living out of a hotel room with your essensials, whilst in newborn stage. No they can't reach anything yet, but keeping all surface area clear makes things quick and easy to clean and sets you up nicely for when they are up and about.

Tell nobody the name until the child is born. 9 x out of 10 someone will draw some sort of negative concoction from it or in my case - steal it for their own child!

 

[Kitt]

Every day or every other day also formula fed I’m still using the ready to feed because they are so much easier but it’s expensive not sure how long I can sustain that to be fair so need to use the prep machine x

ready made is much much easier on their tummies so that might explain the explosions. You might find that when you switch to formula she doesn’t go for a few days or it becomes like nuggets. That’s totally normal as it’s harder for them to digest. If you give her one ready made bottle a day while that’s happening it’ll help her tummy and then when her poos go soft just go to formula only. Finn’s on one good poo a day now after an initial struggle when switching to formula. The ready made are so expensive! Prep machine is super super easy.

 

[Definitelyme]

Hi everyone, not sure if people remember me from dipping in and out of the pregnancy thread but thought I’d hop in here (and hopefully check back as much as I can but things are tough.... see below lol)

My son is 13 weeks old, has been diagnosed with CMPA since week 8, and is on Neocate LCP formula. He’s also got acid reflux and is on omeprozole since week 6.

Basicslly, he does NOT stop crying. He winges from the minute he opens his eyes in the morning until bedtime. He fights his sleep during the day like a MF. Today he’s had a wake window of SIX hours and has been screaming and screaming in frustration because he’s so overtired.

I’m at witts end. I spend my daylight hours fighting with a 3 month old to sleep/ calm him down etc. I dread the day time from the second I wake up. He cries. And im not joking either. I sometimes can’t pick him up or put him down without a crescendo.

My husband is away at work and won’t be back for another 4 weeks and I’m going mad. Health visitor won’t help, GP just keeps saying “it’s colic” (fucking sick of hearing that word), and I’ve not been able to get a paediatric appointment at the hospital for another 2 weeks.

i admit I do give him the odd dose of calpol to try and get him to take his naps in the day, but 9 times out of 10 he only falls asleep after 2+ hours of howling in my face and then passes out exhausted in my arms. I can’t put him down for a sleep because he jolts awake within seconds and the crying starts again.

He’s now sleeping in bed with me at night (safely) and that’s the only way he will sleep longer than 15 minutes.

Could This be part of his CMPA? I just don’t know. He’s my first, and I’ve never known a baby fight sleep like him. He’s just spent 45 minutes kicking and swinging his arms about screaming in frustration because he’s so tired. His little face is swollen with tiredness.

I just can’t cope :-(

As I said above I’ll try and check this thread as much as I can to keep up with you all but my days are spent either fighting with him or crying myself haha.... happy times!

Oh lovely this sounds absolutely soul destroying for you. Very hard for you to enjoy having your beautiful baby when every moment is a fight and you are emotionally exhausted.
I would firstly look at the idea of a soy allergy. If he has CMPA soy often goes hand in hand and I know that sometimes they move them to soy formula which could be causing issues.
Next, definitely keep bedsharing safely. I started with my second babe who was as you’ve described yours. Just constant screaming. Have you thought of bed sharing during the day? So when he is tired take him up to bed and snuggle down too? It may give you some extra moments of him sleeping during the day, and I usually would work that up to being able to slip away for 5 minutes and leave them in bed. You can get a cup of tea and your iPad and head back again to watch a box set. I know it’s not ideal, and some days I felt chained to the bloody bed, but if they get that better sleep better moods often follow.

Does movement help him fall to sleep? Would wearing him in a sling help? It would keep him upright and that would help the reflux, and keeping him close may help settle him if you go for a walk or similar. Although I know when they are like this going out is a terrible thought as you don’t want them screaming all the time.
My last tip would be to try cranial osteopathy if you can. It didn’t “fix” my son but I saw a huge difference in him after a few sessions (after the first actually), in that he only screamed 90% of the day, and that extra 10% made such a difference.

I really feel for you, it is so hard. Just so hard. And obviously awful to think they are so distressed and you can’t help. But my heart goes out to you because I’ve been there and it’s just too much some days And you’ve said above you pray it gets better. Oh I promise it will, but that doesn’t make the days now hard and long x

 

[Bwacac]

I like the one with classical music, makes me feel like it’s slightly better for her quite often half an hour has passed while she’s feeding/asleep and I realise I’m still watching dancing fruits - glad it’s not just me

My baby girl loves the birthday party fruit one. The music on there is so catchy, the 5 strawberries dancing in a line and like nodding gets me moving every time

I have to rant, so please excuse me. Since baby girl was about 8 weeks old we’ve been going to a music class local to me which has been lovely. Yesterday I turned up 20 mins early as I’d walked there (3 miles and totally misjudged how long it would take) when I got there the woman said to me wow you’re early so I said yes I know I’m sorry I’ll sit in reception and feed her and things first. Went to do that and then about 10 mins before class was starting she said come into the class. I follow the company on Facebook and this morning they’ve put up a ‘polite reminder’ which is clearly aimed at me!! I’m so annoyed and I think it’s so unprofessional. Booking is opening at 8pm tonight for the next block of 7 classes which I was happily going to pay £42 to attend. Not now I’m not!!! I’m so close to sending them a message but I thought I’d vent on here instead. Am I being overly sensitive here? X

 

[Rlaw1978]

They don't seem comfortable, none of them do because they're supposed to be firm.
Poor babies

My baby hates it, he wants to sleep in my bed with a duvet and pillow but isn’t allowed

 

[Kitt]

I swear babies once they’re asleep are meant to sleep through anything? I’ve managed to vacuum and Finn didn’t wake up. But sometimes he will do an hour in his bassinet sleeping soundly and the second the dog gets up and pitter patters across the hardwood floors Finn is awake. I feel like I can’t potter around and get stuff done cause it always disturbs him!

 

[Definitelyme]

Yes that’s me.

not really sure what to feel right now. I’m in utter shock!
I just hope their is someone on here that has babies that close in age.
I haven’t felt right for the last few days, but put it down to a dodgy kebab!
thought I’d do a quick test to rule it out, I never even thought it would be positive!

I just don’t really know where to go from here

I have two friends who had babies and were pregnant again at the 8 and 9 month mark. One just has those two and she loved having them so close. Sure, sometimes hard work, but they are now 7 and 8 and can all go and do bigger things as a family, things that are age appropriate and fun for both kids. (The other went on to have 3 more, but her eldest two have always been close).

Just take some time and sit with it and once the shock wears off see how you feel. You’re still coming to terms with all that happened surrounding your son’s birth too, so be kind to yourself and remember there is no right or wrong way to feel about this x

 

[CrimeJunkie]

Omg when the formula is wasted………..

This is the worst!! Especially now I’ve moved my LO onto goats milk which is £21 a bloody tin

Just a wee moan from me…

Baby is a car crier. 3 out of 4 of my babies have been, and it makes life just that little bit more difficult than it should be. My parents kindly take my toddler on a Wednesday so I have all day free until the school run. But getting out to do errands is pretty much impossible as he screams the whole time in the car. Or if I go at nap time that’s fine, but if it’s only a 20 min car journey then he only sleeps for that 20mins, then he’s exhausted, and then 20 mins of screaming on the way home I dunno what part of my kids is broken to make them cry in the car and not enjoy it like other babies

Just catching up on the thread. I have a car crier too! Well, mostly when we stop at traffic lights which is an absolute nightmare when you live in a busy town centre car has to be moving for a good 20 mins before she’ll fall asleep and instantly wakes up as soon as the car journey ends

 

[moimoi]

My 4 month old usually goes to bed around 10pm which works fine for me as I don’t have any other kids or responsibilities so we tend to get up at 9am! My partner will do his last feed at 9pm.

 

[WhatABore]

We actually ended up having a great night slept 11.30-2.30 up for a feed then back down from about 3.30-7! Thought she would be a nightmare too but she slept the first part of the night in a nappy and swaddle then second part in a vest on my chest (I'm still so paranoid about putting her down after a middle of the night feed because the last few times we've done it she's choked ,but this way we both get a bit of sleep! )
8 week vaccinations tomorrow and I'm getting so worked up didn't think I would be one of those mums either
Do you guys think calpol before or after is better? Nurse said its personal preference but I don't know how I'm supposed to know what I prefer to do if I've never done it before

I always got told not to give it to them before so I've always done it after and not had a problem

 

[Kitt]

Finn is now seemingly magnetised to mommy and will only sleep in the daytime if he’s on my chest. Nighttime he does go down ok mostly but in the day if we pop him in his carry cot he’ll just wake up instantly. Now I know this is totally normal but I literally can’t get anything done. It’s lovely snuggling with him but I’m just sat on the sofa like a potato for most of the day. Not productive at all. I’ve ordered a sling (the easiest one I could find) but does anyone have any tips for how long this might last or how to ease him into sleeping in his carrycot in the daytime?

 

[OIM]

We had one of the star wraps years ago, didn’t use it much (second baby hated the pram) but they were easy to pop on and have the wee hat bit, and work really well. They would be a great option for you.

So, I was at Tesco this morning and picked this up. It’s thin fleece, I think some people use these at night? But I use them over normal clothes for outdoors for a little one. Was only £6! We had every size in them except the one I need for this winter I’ll link some from next too. I know they look so thin compared to a snowsuit but I honestly haven’t ever had a baby cold in one (bare in mind I babywear so we have that shared heat too)

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Fab thank you!! Definitely something we need. I baby wear a lot so will be fab.

Second children are definitely sent to try us or mine is. First week at nursery and the worst sleep we’ve had since she was a newborn, then she slept all night last night apart from 2oz of milk at midnight and had a 2.5 hour nap. I thought we were onto something. But no. She had her second seizure in 2 weeks. So think the sleep was not a good sign!