New baby and post birth advice #28 being a mum is the best present I could have ever wished for

[LilyRose1234]

Had an hours party at 2.30 - the dogs slept on the bed for the first time in ages, and for the first time since the baby has been obsessed with them. She woke up, somehow knew they were there and got SO excited, went crawling down the bed babbling and giggling. Left it a minute then flashed my phone light over and there she was with her head on the dogs belly waving at me and laughing, wee terror

 

[jackolantern]

Look if Tommy has to cut a bish to fight for T2 he will, I ain’t raised no quitter

 

[Definitelyme]

Haven’t had a chance to catch up on all the chat from the weekend but hope everyone is doing well and getting some sleep

 

[jackolantern]

I'm taking small demon to the garden centre on my own tomorrow and I'm already regretting it, I'm fully expecting to come away having spent £10,000 on those fancy garden centre jellycat toys he will chew for 30 seconds just to shut him up

Just realised chew toys makes him sound like one of the hounds but tbf, that's a reasonable assessment, he's probably more feral than they are

 

[I’mThankyou_]

KW said to me today "this is your job now try to cope better". No I have a job that pays me a wage, these are OUR children and I'm struggling so get off your ass and HELP ME.

Knobwaffle doesn't cover this, it's time to draw for the big guns here....
C*NTWAFFLE

 

[onlyheretoorbit]

We took our first trip to the city center today! All of these little outings help me to feel more confident for when OH leaves and I’m on my own with a 7 week old and my aging dad when he visits.

I think I’m nervous because she eats on demand and doesn’t “demand” until she’s over hungry and then starts crying a lot. Then I need to find somewhere to feed her that’s not smack dab in the middle of a city street or on a bus etc. We did feed in car park today so that was a new adventure. Only a few people saw my breasts .

I also feel like such a fraud when I say “gave birth”. I always put it in air quotes because I feel like to give birth one must labor and push. What kind of ducked up internalized misogynistic thinking is that? Am I being silly for thinking this? OH says yes. (I don’t want to cause any offense to others who’ve had sections, this is my own messed up thinking)

I always find posh shops usually have a ‘parent room’ or somewhere to feed and change if you want somewhere quiet and out of the way. Our John Lewis has these lovely little roomswhere you can sit in a comfy chair and feed in a rocking chair. I don’t breastfeed but it can still be awkward bottle feeding if you’re not sat at a table in a cafe etc so I usually head there.

Also with you on the section thing. Mine was elective so I always compare it to booking in for a hair cut part of me feels sad that I never experienced a contraction or waters breaking etc as I don’t think I’ll have anymore babies


KW has already pissed me off this morning. I’m probably being unreasonable but I’ve just woken up in a shit mood But last night he was downstairs watching football, so I made up baby’s bottles and popped them in a sink of cold water to cool down, went upstairs and forgot about them until I woke up this morning

Asked Mr O if he by any chance thought to pop them in the fridge and he acted as if that would be an absolutely insane thing to do… ‘no, why would I?’ Well I hoped maybe you’d use some common fucking sense and remember that they’re always usually in the fridge?!?! ‘Well I thought maybe you’d put them there for a reason’ - why would I deliberately leave any kind of milk out in the sink overnight?!?

I’m annoyed at myself for forgetting but I’m also just annoyed at his lack of consideration. If he paid more attention it wouldn’t be on ME to remember everything all the bloody time.

So anyway, I reckon that’s 21oz of milk down the drain and baby o is crying while we wait for the kettle

 

[Definitelyme]

Happy birthday @jackolantern

@Definitelyme thank you for checking in!
We went to Germany for a couple of days. Bit mixed feelings. It was great to be somewhere else, but KW worked a bit/did some virtual meetings, which pissed me off.
I had told him so often leading up to our holiday I was looking forward to spending time with the three of us, but also the two of us while Kitten slept. I know he's not feeling great because of a number of reasons (work, his dad passing, etc). We're both sleep deprived and a bit down/depressed, so it's taking a toll on us as a couple. It was my birthday about 6 or 7 weeks ago and he still didn't get me anything. Sounds silly, but makes me feel shitty. I feel like he's just taking me for granted and he's not motivated to do anything at all. It's like he's checked out.
I'm sure we'll get through this, but it's really hard atm. Some days I just want to pack up and leave, but he's great with Kitten and I do still love him.

Kitten also keeps grabbing her ears, so going to an ENT today. She's had 2 ear infections in June and it looks like they're still lingering on now. Had hoped it would've cleared up now with nursery being closed, but it's been 2,5 weeks now and she still seems to have some issues with her ears

Sorry for the word vomit...
Feeling a bit down lately

Oh, and Kitten (and KW) slept pretty well on holiday, but I slept horribly. One night I spent over an hour panicking, thinking someone was going to come and kidnap Kitten. I walked around the appartment to check if anyone was there, went to check on Kitten, absolutely positive I was going to find an empty crib. Why do our brains do this?

Sounds like a really tough few weeks for you. You’ve had so much going on, it’s no wonder you aren’t feeling great. Did your hormones settle at all? Or do you think that could still be part of it?
there is no excuse for not getting you a birthday present, that is just mean. Especially since it’s been his birthday since then and you got him something!
Hopefully kitten will be feeling better soon after seeing the ENT. Some kids do seem to be very prone to ear infections

Shit hun shall I send the axe wielder for backup? We’ll bring @I’mThankyou_ ‘s twin 2 and we’ll have you sorted in no time

No no, that’s me in the balaclava

 

[calmyourritas]

Just cutting baby Rita’s nails and she moved her hand when I wasn’t expecting it and I cut a tiny bit of skin off she really screamed and cried and it was bleeding although it has stopped now. Currently feeling like the worst mum and I’m so traumatised I feel like I never want to cut them again

 

[LittleBluebird]

Don’t ask me how but just squirted myself in the face with fresh from the boob breast milk.

 

[Sailorontheseasea]

I think I need a lobotomy. Have caught myself this morning thinking about what it would be like with 4 kids???? Am I insane???? T is only 7 months??? I have 3 under 5????

Doesn’t help that the baby is sent from heaven, most chilled out dude I’ve ever met. I’ve seen the other side of babies in my middle and it’s like the firey pits of hell (no offence to middle sailor intended) but surely it can’t be that bad? It definitely was that bad. Mr Sailor has said an absolute no.

Someone send me some life aid and please put a stop to this train of thought immediately

Is anyone else just permanently broody in life? When does it end? Can you tell I’ve had 3 shots of espresso in my coffee this morning?

 

[jackolantern]

Unpopular opinion, I honestly couldn’t give less of a shit, I wouldn’t have even known about it if it wasn’t the fact that every fucking place I go people are talking about it. I’m happy you are all happy but Jesus take the wheel I’ll be glad when normality is restored

 

[Crazycatlady18]

I think we have teeth!! I can feel a very sharp edge in her mouth! Probably explains why she’s been so unsettled and not sleeping well, along with her new routine.

 

[calmyourritas]

I've just managed to bake for the first time in 8 weeks. Have missed it so much, now just to remember to get it out of the oven.

You baking at 8am on a Sunday morning is who I aspire to be 🤍

 

[PrincessShark]

I’m upstairs with BabyShark (she’s snoozing and I‘ve just got out the shower). Heard voices downstairs, FIL has just turned up with no notice
This is why I miss living in the middle of nowhere! None of this ‘I was just passing’ s%!t that he comes up with now. I had a long conversation with him about boundaries and how you cannot just drop in on us. He’s taken full advantage of the fact MrShark is home this morning. Ughhhhh.

 

[Littleelf]

Could you still find someone to change the locks while he's out? What a prick...
Don't let hime try to get you to take 5 yo swimming.
In Dutch we say "wie zijn gat verbrandt, moet op de blaren zitten", which translates to "if you burn your butt, you have to sit on the blisters".

Don't know if MrCat is one of the lurking KW's, but he has booked us a surprise tomorrow, with Kitten, and told me he needs to go out tomorrow morning for... reasons... (Insinuating he'll go out to buy gifts). So that's pretty nice

I just went to visit my 1 week old nephew and he's soooo adorable! He's a big boy, 56 cm at birth, but compared to Kitten he is SO smoll I'm feeling so broody now! Although I still don't want to think of having another one before Kitten is at least a bit more independent

Oh he'll be sitting right on his blisters tomorrow trust me

 

[I’mThankyou_]

You know what I'm sick of?
Pink tax.
Things costing more because they're marketed for girls or women.
A pack of three boys baby grows £6. Unisex £7. Girls? £9+
Boys megablocks £13. Girls megablocks £20 just because they're pink.
like who do I complain too, its too many individual complaints. I'm really sick of it.
I dont believe in all the blue for boys pink for girls shite. The twins have many items of clothes from the boys section, but what pisses me off is that because it's marketed toward the female market its okay to have a higher profit margin? No. Not today. I've just spent a fortune on new vests in Tescos because all the boys and unisex ones were sold out and with twins and I don't have the time nor paitentce to get rid of the stains nor have I got endless hours to spend on my washing mountain basket.
That's my rant of the day. I'm off to see where I complain to one singular person rather than a bunch of fools.

 

[Babyyoda88]

Happy first birthday @Babyyoda88

Thank you!
Hope the I’m thank yous are all ok x x

Happy @Babyyoda88 day, I hope bub isn't as halfcut as their namesake

haha! Not far off!! Thank you! Hope you and Tommy are ok

@Babyyoda88 Happy birthday to tiny babyyoda I hope you’ve all had a lovely day celebrating. It’s been a tough year for you all so you definitely deserve it x

Thank you so much. We’re having a lovely time so far! X

Yes my kw is always like this! If we’re tidying up the house for visitors etc he will decide to clean something totally random like the inside of the wardrobe (true story) rather than being useful and hoovering the living room .

Happy birthday baby @Babyyoda88 hope you’re having a lovely weekend celebrating together

Thank you! We had a lovely tea party at my parents today and we’re at the lakes tomorrow. Hope you’re having a lovely weekend!

 

[Babyyoda88]

Sure you can do with one kidney anyway right?

Not quite the same situation, but when my nephew was born (full term) he was very unwell, had to be helicoptered to a specialist hospital at 1 day old and had 3 operations over a few weeks. My SIL didn’t celebrate his first birthday as she said she couldn’t bring herself to as it was just reminding her of how horrendous the NICU stay and the whole situation had been. They had a day together as a family, and then they celebrated 6 weeks later - on the anniversary of when he came home from hospital and their “proper” family life began. I know that it’s different for everyone, but just to let you know others have felt similar about a first birthday approaching.

Thanks @Definitelyme I would like to forever pretend October is her birth date really but we have a lovely weekend planned with my family on Saturday and then we’re going to the lakes for her actual birthday.
Hope your lot are all ok x

 

[Definitelyme]

Had anyone used a Haakaa? I tend to leak quite a bit from the opposite breast, but feed her on both breasts each feeding as per the LC. If I use the Haakaa, will it decrease the amount of milk she can get when it’s that breast’s turn? If that makes sense.

I’ve just ordered a Haakaa since I can leak almost 150ml per 24 hours and this seems an easier way to collect it than the leak cups / shields I’ve been using, and I’d also like to build a bit of a stash for when I go back to work and for a trip home to America I have to make when she’s 3 months sans baby.

Not sure if you’ve had lots of answers, haven’t read through everything!
No, you won’t “use up” the milk on the side you collect it from using the Haakaa, there will still be plenty when she comes to feed. Milk is supply and demand so the more milk is removed, the more milk is made.
Saying that you do need to be a bit careful as the haakaa uses a gentle suction system so as well as collecting the leaks it will actually stimulate milk removal. This can then lead to oversupply, and can also lead to blocked ducts if the milk isn’t being removed efficiently

Back to work for me

Good luck friend

@Definitelyme you all ok?! I know Sundays are the most dreaded days for you too

Thank you for thinking of me

We’ve been away this weekend, so not only was the usual Sunday bleugh not felt, we actually had a really wonderful day yesterday Hope all the Wakas are well!

 

[jackolantern]

Speaking of ages, the twins are almost 1, does that mean when they're toddlers I gotta leave here? Cause I'm invested I ain't going nowhere.
I'm gonna start using their corrected age to get me longer

Excuse me. The twins could be 30 and you aren’t allowed to leave