New baby and post birth advice #2

[Hbirdette]

Did anyone's babies have the 4 month sleep regression? Keep reading on Instagram about it from these sleep consultants and absolutely dreading it. LO is 3 month and sleeps generally well at night at the moment!

I don’t think my baby did... he’s 5 months now and I’ve not noticed his sleep getting any worse, I’m not massively convinced by them if I’m honest. A bit like “leaps” sorry if I offend anyone on here but I think they’re ridiculous

 

[Disneylifeonly]

So last night Thomas fell asleep at 2am, slept until 5 then woke up foe a feed and slept from 630 until 9am so I've managed some sleep

 

[Hbirdette]

Saw someone I know yesterday, I don’t know her very well but why did she feel the need to say “if you have another baby they will probably be a nightmare if this one is easy”

Thanks for your input, Karen. I’m not even joking, her name is actually Karen

 

[klarakluckbag]

Thanks ladies, I'm really praying we won't need another hospital stay. We stayed in after he was born for 4 days and he was on the light box for 2 of those. But we were discharged and told it would shift. The health visitor today said if he still had it at 3 weeks it becomes a problem, but didn't explain further and said she didn't envision him being in that position next week. However now maybe she does, who knows.

Yes @Definitelyme she mentioned about breast fed babies having it for longer and the best way to get rid is to feed him every 3 hours. I'm expressing as was told to give him formula in the hospital when he was on the light box so he got used to the easy bottle and used my nipple as a dummy, the midwifes seemed quite dismissive when I asked for help, but that's a whole other conversation!!!

I work in midwifery and we see lots of babies with prolonged jaundice, especially if they're exclusively BF. We recommend a bilirubin and liver function blood test at around 3 weeks if a baby is still visibly jaundiced, but the hospital down the road (a different Trust) does this at 2 weeks. Some babies will still have raised levels of bilirubin at 3+ weeks but if the baby is otherwise well and above birthweight, the doctors tend to leave well alone and "wait and see", usually offering a final blood test a little later on (6-8 weeks). It's very rare that a baby will be readmitted after their light therapy has finished, the final blood tests are just to ensure that nothing has been missed.


If your baby has had light therapy, and afterwards has had 2x bilirubin tests where the level is below the treatment line and falling, your baby will be discharged. Again, they would repeat the blood tests at 3+ weeks, just to make sure that all is well.

I know that these tests are horrible, and it's very disheartening to have to keep going back to hospital, but we are saving many more babies from serious illness with this approach. We do feel your pain though, having to take several heelprick tests over the course of 2 or 3 days, is no fun for us either, especially with those poor babies that just don't bleed much, and we have to prick them 3 or 4 times in the same foot, just to get a tiny bottle of blood

The "3 hourly" feeds advice causes so much confusion. If your baby is very jaundiced, it can make them sleepy and lethargic, they can sleep through their feed times and can end up becoming weaker, and will lose more weight and can get dehydrated. If they are older than a week, gaining weight well, are alert and active, and you know that they are having decent feeds, you don't have to wake them on the clock at 3 hourly intervals. I wouldn't let them sleep for much longer than 4 hours when under 3 weeks old, but sometimes, waking them up before they're ready, is just counterproductive, they're not hungry, and they're cross because they're still tired.

Nipple confusion is very common if you've had to bottle-feed your baby in the early days. There is help out there if you want to continue to BF, although in some areas, you may have to hunt it down. . La Leche league, BF Facebook groups, and your HV should be able to help, and remember, breastfeeding is an ongoing process, just because something isn't going right today, doesn't mean that it can't be fixed sooner or later. It's a bit like learning to drive, you can't get everything right first time!

 

[Disneylifeonly]

Yea I'm a horn dog as my partner says I was shocked at how not painful and normal it felt, I was worried it was going to feel like waving a stick around a tunnel

 

[moimoi]

I don’t think my baby did... he’s 5 months now and I’ve not noticed his sleep getting any worse, I’m not massively convinced by them if I’m honest. A bit like “leaps” sorry if I offend anyone on here but I think they’re ridiculous

The Wonder Weeks app is the most pointless thing ever! Pissed I paid for it. I could have got a meal deal for the price Everything is online but I also haven’t noticed any difference in sleep or grumpiness during the ‘leaps’!

 

[Squiggle]

This thread has the most kind hearted people on here I have no advice for some of the recent posts, just want to say I appreciate how lovely you all are xx

 

[Hairraiser]

I can honestly say I never had the desire straight afterwards, I hear so many people talk about it but never felt it myself. I do know now that I’m “done” and don’t want any more kids, I haven’t ever felt that way before.

I wish I had some advice for you. You’ve spoken about your journey to motherhood, and it’s clear how important having a family is to you x



I also hate the heat. And I hate direct sunlight I hide in the shady spots

It’s getting to the point now where I can’t even look at a pregnant woman if I see one, or any pregnancy/birth announcements online

I get a few hours to myself this evening for a bath & pamper while hubby has the baby. And I’m sitting in the bath just crying at photos of him as a newborn. I’m so so so desperate to do it all again .
I feel bad for my boy as I’m just completely overwhelmed by these feelings and I’m worried I’m not giving him the attention he needs

 

[Chickenandgravy]

Babies just have the best timing don't they

Health visitor was coming in and of course we had to have an explosive, all up the back and hair nappy took that nappy off and she peed EVERYWHERE, lifted her out the way of the pee and she was sick all down me

Ah the joys

 

[Definitelyme]

Ahh remember the other day I was saying about taking spare clothes for yourself when you travel with a baby?

Guess who forgot her spare clothes today?

Guess who got vommed on 10 minutes in to the plane journey?!

 

[Upintheair83]

I’m ages away from giving birth but thought I’d hop on this thread to have a little rant. I keep seeing people on Instagram etc saying how difficult it is having a baby, that you don’t realise until they are here how hard it really is etc and it’s really starting to get to me. I know they are just trying to be honest and show the reality of being a parent, I know it won’t be all roses and rainbows but it’s kind of making me dread giving birth! Hope I’m not the only one to ever feel like this and hope I don’t sound awful!

Just to jump on to reiterate what @Chickenandgravy said. I'm 6 weeks in and I felt exactly the same as you. And I was sick of people saying 'enjoy your sleep because you won't have jt when baby arrives'
But honestly,iv found it a wonderful experience. Even on the bad days. Life is different, I won't lie. But it's in a wonderful way, and a more enriched way. Of course it can be tiring and there are days you want more sleep but you get through it hun. Please don't listen to other people when they paint this grim picture. I swear people just like to say it to make new mums have the fear!
Sending you lots of love and please don't worry, there's so much to look forward to xxxx

 

[Definitelyme]

Our boy is a real chuckle-y fella. He properly guffaws and his whole body shakes (his rolls of fat wobble like he’s a jelly ) he loves a good laugh, but he quite often gives himself the hiccups at the same time

 

[Hbirdette]

So I’m not planning on going back to work yet but I’ve been looking at jobs online working out roughly what my salary would be, combined with my husbands salary.

errrrrrrm how the fuck do you afford childcare?! Genuinely don’t understand how to do this

 

[Chickenandgravy]

Need a rant
Really pissed at my partner....I've not washed my hair for 10 days (not through lack of trying btw and I have the thickest hair on the planet so it takes me about 2 hours from start to finish) so my partner said you do that this morning and I'll watch the wee one. So here I am two hours later with still wet hair, while he fannies about with the car. He finally comes up to take her and she needs a feed so here I will be for another 40 mins feeding, I've expressed plenty of milk for him to bottle feed her with nut of course she's screaming and needs fed ASAP . I've got guests coming at 1pm aswell
I had her ALL day yesterday (which obviously I don't mind, I love her) but just wish sometimes he would offer to have her for a wee bit so I could nip out or anything! All I asked for was a couple hours to do my hair I got a dyson air wrap for my bday 2 weeks ago and really want to use it

 

[Chickenandgravy]

So I had the breast feeding consultation this morning, she was AMAZING. Given me so much confidence and help for feeding without the nipple shields, don't feel as hopeless about it all now. So glad I did it, even though it was pretty expensive it was totally worth it I think!

 

[LilyRose1234]

I GOT MY FIRST SMILE
Ps think I’ll be giving baby classes (except swimming) a miss from some of these stories

 

[moimoi]

Hey, I think your quite local to me, where abouts do you go to the baby groups? I am looking for one for me and my daughter, thank you xx

I’m in south east London (Greenwich borough), there are loads of Better children’s centres nearby. Feel free to send me a message x

Reporting back from my Peanut date, it was actually really nice to get out and speak to a fellow mum with a baby of a similar age (she had a boy too, born 6 days apart at the same hospital!) We did a lap around the park then sat inside a cafe to feed our babies. Not awkward at all. Babies enjoyed staring at each other.

It was the first time I breastfed in public my boy did not appreciate a muslin over his head to help cover my modesty so I just was like ‘fuck it, tits out!’

 

[Definitelyme]

Got me a screaming banshee tonight he went absolutely apeshit for an hour, and he’s a LOUD crier, just exactly when no2 and no3 were trying to go to sleep He’s asleep in the sling now but keeps threatening to start again so I’m just wandering the house like a nomad, in fear

 

[Hbirdette]

So I’ve mentioned on here before about childcare costs etc, I had a proper sit down chat with my husband this evening about what is doable for us as a family. My mat pay runs out in December but I don’t have a specific job to go back to, so I need to think about getting my arse in gear.
When I had my baby I decided to retrain so I’ve been studying whilst looking after my baby (nuts, eh?!) as I only had GCSEs to my name. Anyway, I’m going to start properly job hunting in September, with a hope to start work in nov/dec or January at an absolute push. Hopefully we’re going to do 2 days nursery, 1 day my in laws and then if I can do full time hours over 4 days (praying ) then my husband will have one day off in the week and one day off at the weekend. If I have to do 5 days a week it will be my parents one day then my husband still taking a day off. I don’t really know why I’m putting this on here, just felt like I needed to type it. The prospect of a new career is exciting and daunting but I just wish I could stay with my baby all the time

 

[Jojoo]

We should set up a post partum weight loss thread to support each other and also understand that sometimes you just need that chocolate bar to get through the day