You’re right, I need to regain some of the power. I feel like due to the situation I just feel controlled and like my life isn’t my own.I’m no contact with my mother and brother, I don’t answer numbers I don’t know or with held numbers, I never have.
If someone needs you, they will leave a message. If she texts or emails you, delete it. Take back the power!
I understand, when I was at the height of our ‘separation’ it was all consuming and I felt really battered down.You’re right, I need to regain some of the power. I feel like due to the situation I just feel controlled and like my life isn’t my own.
I'm the same when it's father's day. Hang on in there, it will be over soon xxxIt's Mother's day here in UK and I can't wait for it to be over. If I read another post about how fantastic somebody's mum is I think I'll explode.
Yes.I'm the same when it's father's day. Hang on in there, it will be over soon xxx
Same here!It's Mother's day here in UK and I can't wait for it to be over. If I read another post about how fantastic somebody's mum is I think I'll explode.
I sent a card with my kids photos as she nevers sees them and just wanted to remind her what she's missing. My kids are fab and I've made sure I've filled the void of "Nanny" myself. I do feel desperatly sad that I've not had a "Mum", but I hide that away. Days like this, my birthday and Christmas are now ever so painful. Sending love to all those in similar situations xxI have very minimal contact with my parents due to my mother but I sent a card and flowers only because doing nothing would be 'thrown back' at me at some point. Last year I gifted a voucher for somewhere and later had a card/letter ( can't remember why) and it had a side note that she no longer visited that place.
I just laughed because I really didn't give a f*** as with the flowers I am just playing her game back at her.
Lots of people will tell you to forgive. You don’t have to. There is no point in forgiving someone unless they are sorry.My father was a terrible husband to my mum- now passed- and worse dad to me. Adored my brother who is neither use nor ornament.
He is now in a care home after a stroke. Has been for 2 years.
He is self funding.
I have so much I could say about him.
He was an awful man.
Now we are losing our inheritance too. Which was mostly my mums money.
I feel consumed really with hate for him.
I can’t get peace in my head. I would really appreciate some of your advice
I'm so sorry. My dad is in a care home too. Do you visit? I struggle to be honest.My father was a terrible husband to my mum- now passed- and worse dad to me. Adored my brother who is neither use nor ornament.
He is now in a care home after a stroke. Has been for 2 years.
He is self funding.
I have so much I could say about him.
He was an awful man.
Now we are losing our inheritance too. Which was mostly my mums money.
I feel consumed really with hate for him.
I can’t get peace in my head. I would really appreciate some of your advice
I went once on my own, and was told not to come without kids next time as he wanted to see them more than me , been a couple of times and could quite happily not go again.No I don’t visit. I do all of the admin - we have deputyship. I’m selling the properties, there are 2. It’s a full time job. And I already have one of those!
if I have to go I can’t eat, get a bad stomach & it makes me feel so ill.
how often do you go? X
So so true.Yes they are both quite wealthy luckily for them. Care is very expensive. It's not really a life they are living in these care homes, as nice as they are though. I leave after seeing them in turmoil, it drags up lots of feelings, I mask when I see them so it takes days to recover. And my OH and kids get my grumpy self. That's why I'd rather not go but the guilt trips. They're your parents, they looked after you. Blah, blah
I agree, no one really understands. My relationship with my brother is ruined also because of things.
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