Nadia shows a jar of the best garlic powder she has ever had. Does Mark show us said jar? Of course not. They are worried because Faith hasn't been in the chat for 2 days. Maybe she has seen the light and got a life. Mr. Almost Ph.D. doesn't know what a salt pig is. He also doesn't know what Julienne means. He talks about wet aubergines.
The bag of salt and what not "IT LOOKS LIKE A BAG OF COCAINE!!" Ridiculous cackling. Nadia goes on about her mastic spice and he says it looks like crack and it is like an episode of "Breaking Bad" in the kitchen.
Weren't they making crystal meth in "Breaking Bad"? Is it wise to put a hot wok onto a counter top Nadia? Did you know Mark made sumac with the drummer from Pink Floyd? Well, not really, he just filmed him on "Taste of My Life." You know, that show he did back in 17 odd years ago.
Dina gives Nadia a jar to open and she bangs it on the cooker. "For the 'Gram, for the 'Gram, FOR THE 'GRAAAAAAAM!" Dina shoves her wrap in her gob and Nadia asks if she has a hangover.
"When I as the food columnist for the Mirror" says Nadia. Dina say she always says that. "WELL I WAS!"
Emphasis on the WAS. Someone in chat asks about the aprons and Nads says she can't find them. Surprise, surprise. Macaroni and cheese plowman's is what Nads is making and apparently it was most downloaded recipe she did for the Mirror. Boatload of butter and how many tablespoons of flour? Five.
You know how you are told in order to cook well, you did to put love into it? How to describe Nadia's style, I would say benign neglect. Dina gives Nadia's stirring the side eye whilst she finishes her wrap.
"Mark made the base of this sauce last week."
Aww who's a good boy? "OH BUMHOLES!" Nadia spilt her milk.
Dina pours in the milk. Dina gives free publicity to Lidl. Nadia plunks the cheese in and Mark says he wants to put his face in it.
NO ONE CARES MARK! She manhandles to pasta into the sauce, beats it around the pan. Mark says he is having it after his workout. Nadia suggest reheating in a steamer.
"What's that?" asks Mark "It's the Ploughman's, it's what make it the Ploughman's" says Nadia. A big spoonful of Branton pickle, bleugh. "I hate Brantson Pickle." "Oh thanks Mark!"
Eww, now she is shoving bits of bread in it.
I can feel the carbs clinging to my thighs just by looking at that! Now for more cheese on top kids!
Now I'm gonna need a CABG at this rate. She says she isn't putting masses on, "just sprinkling it on the bread." Dina suggest Lidl's Italian style vegan cheese, but it seems they have stopped making it. Nadia puts it in the oven for 20 mins and there is the Henry situated just below the oven with a cord hanging out. Dina goes to make some baklava and I am bored.