Mumsnet #39 Chatbot or fatbot?

[girlinbrum]

This person must be on MN

 

[bread-pitt]

Sitting in the lounge at Heathrow in transit to Asia and I think I’ve seen a MNer in the wild. I don’t know if you have Little House on The Prairie in the UK, but that’s what she looks like, only even more miserable. Big sister wife dress, wool socks, laced boots, two braids, and it’s taken her an hour to eat two bits of lettuce.

I’m also on my third Breton top sighting.

 

[HotDawg]

Someone has started a thread about not wanting to go to a buffet. Every time I see “plates piled high” and “gluttony” I shall eat 1000 calories to balance out their outrage.

 

[CatCafe234]

I’d prefer a Jaffa cake to a mouthful of jizz any day.

My nomination for the next thread title!

 

[orangehead]

Thread title suggestion - Mumsnet: no bananas and sex once a year.

It really does sum them up.

 

[HotDawg]

Mate, BIWI aka The Carbfinder General will be after you for that

Wish we could change usernames on here. I wanna be the Carbfinder General!

 

[cat_follower]

Biwi’d do a weird high-fat shite in her keto pants if she knew the thinnest I’ve ever been was when I was mainly eating noodles, tatties and toast, oh aye and loads of smoothies made mainly of bananas

 

[Kikini Bamalam]

Not convinced this is real at all. If you had concerns that your kid was a nonce, would you post on MN for advice?

Just to add, I was also a bit leery of Noddy, just because her tales were a bit outlandish to be honest.

 

[CrimsonCountess]

I hope Athena51 is a tattler

 

[orangehead]

This guy is very anti-salad, he wouldn't survive on MN

I can’t watch that, when I click it it asks if I accept all cookies but cookies are UPF so I can’t.

 

[ClaraPlum]

But surely all of their strapping 6 foot rugby playing hollow leg sons will thrive in the army. We would have the finest conscripts in the world if it’s made up of mumsnetters darling boys.

 

[Serene Serena]

One of those, "You're so lucky that your Dad turns up with random people at your house. He could be dead".


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I know it’s not really funny but the dead relatives one-upmanship on Mumsnet never fails to cheer me up.

Your brother called you a brain dead fat loser? Be grateful you have a brother to verbally abuse you because MY brother died and I would give anything to have him call me names.

 

[Geetbo]

I'm starting to fear seeing one of my posts screenshot and posted on here. What do I do if that happens?

Shamelessly slag yourself off. It’s what I would do.

 

[ShopTilYouSlop]

Poster in AIBU worrying about wearing a new dress... and she hasnt WASHED it prewear! What fresh hell is this?

Yeah, a lot of them are in horror at the thought of not washing new clothes before wearing them. I've seen them fret about how someone might have sneezed on them, wiped their bum on them, someone mentioned lice...

Here's a suggestion. If your clothes are regularly arriving with snot, shit and lice on them, return them and shop somewhere else???

 

[orangehead]

Why is AIBU so doom and gloom the last couple of days? Lots of veiled references to some kind of terrifying event that means we all have to stockpile food and water for some reason. Rishi is trying to wind us all up isn’t he, maybe Akshata is a MNer.

Someone said they work in food supply and they’ve been told to order 4 weeks worth of food at a time instead of 2 or something and because rishi called an election as well that means there’s going to be nuclear war or something. So glad Tesco will have 4 weeks worth of coco pops when I’m hit with a nuclear bomb, that’ll really help.

On a thread yesterday someone was asking what people have ‘prepared’ in case there’s a cyber attack, civil war or nuclear war. Someone said their freezer was full and someone said they were stockpiling tinned food. So everyone just build a pyramid and beans and hide behind that when the nukes are dropped and then live off of frozen food kept lovely and fresh by the magical electricity supply.

Someone said just stay inside with the windows shut for three days until you’re rescued. Can’t wait to hide inside for theee days eating beans while I wait for rishi to turn up in a helicopter and Tom cruise me out the country.

 

[ButtonDownTheHutches]

I'd brag about that tbf

A go on Terry would be well worth bragging about.

You might not walk straight for a while afterwards, mind you

 

[PeekABooToYou]

Haven’t caught up on this chat for a couple of days (don’t shout RTFT at me ) but leaving this here from a recent thread about the appearance of cabin crew.

 

[Geetbo]

Someone in baby names needs help (interpret that how you choose) - What is the best baby name for a baby with green eyes.

Medusa.

 

[Kikini Bamalam]

Yeah, she'd shagged a fair few celebs hadn't she.

Yup, the nearest I've ever got to shagging a celeb was calling Bruno Brookes a cunt in 1989

 

[LilyPond]

I had to hide the weight loss DRUGS thread I've lost 7.5 stone on Ozempic/Wegovy and they can shove their concern trolling up their arses.

And as for the unpopular opinions threads they are always a hideous disaster, from 0 to euthanise fat and disabled people in 2.5 seconds. Also the opinions are rarely unpopular on MN, they are bog standard snobby middle-class, racist. bigoted, fat hating ableist bullshit.