Mrs Hinch #516

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It’s a full time job keeping up with you nusty trolls...this recap was a cracker🤣
 
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Not to stick up for her but one my my mini strawbs is close to Ronnie’s age & if I had the funds to buy a house that we could all have our own rooms and en-suites I 100% would however that en-suite would have a deadbolt across the top of it until such a time my child was old enough to not duck about in it.
Myself & Mr Strawberry spent this evening hitting the garden in prep of our annual blasting the duck out of everything with the pressure washer for the contents of Smyths to appear from the garage otherwise known as “ Summer Shite” swingball/bouncy castle etc because it’s almost spring and the kids can be outdoors all day ( THANK THE LORD) it makes me sad that those boys most likely won’t be the type of kids to be told right out you go cmoan let’s go build a den and make a tree swing ! Shoved infront of iPads till kingdom come
 
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Been trying to catch up on the last thread and this one, but unlike Sopha’s busy day sitting on a hay bale snogging the woolly wankers, churning out something vile looking for Lenor and bragging “We have 5 bedrooms don’t ya know, one is for Henners and yes it’s panelled as he’s soooo spechiaaaaal cackle cackle” I’ve been busy entertaining real not ‘tend friends, although singing Sopha style “Kumbaya” to them I doubt I’ll ever see them again 🤪

Anyhow, just popped on to say it’s a pity she wasn’t actually “Blown away”during the storms of the past few days. Looks like Geppetto’s feeder for the Woolly Wankers was though 🤭🤭🤭

Two words: Brick Schlippppppps 😂
 

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What a recap Sausage, brilliant as others have said I can't be bothered to read threads as its repeat, repeat repeat. As you where guys
Edit Did read a great laugh out loud thread ty.
 
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Don't know if this had been posted about. But even mumsnet have said they aren't keen on her.

I remember when she first started and I wrote a thread on mumsnet about her saying I didn't know what the excitement was about her. It blew up and apparently she ended up commenting on the thread herself 🤣 don't know if that's true though.
They are a such a lovely family. So Kond!! 🤪
 

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Winning title by no one. Because you nusty trolls couldn't even be bothered to suggest any! Thread titles taken from page 30 onwards and can't have swears.

The Hinch Herald
Woman goes on spending splurge and "loves it".
Sophie Rose, 32, of Maldon spent her Sunday afternoon shopping for unnecessary land fill items and cleaning products at Home Bargains. Local chemist, Aspi Rin, said, "She's got more chemicals under her sink than I have in my shop. Sometimes when I'm short, I ask her for various bits, and she always obliges and gives me half empty bottles in unmarked containers to take away. She's very charitable and also donates to the food bank regularly when she can find it". Recycling Manager, Skippy Tipper said, "She keeps me and the lads in a job. She's always bringing her kids for a day out here and treating us to a sing song while she's parked up with Lon in the back, forward-facing in his car seat. We're double busy now she's bought The Crem and it's being renovated".

In other news, multi millionaire Mrs Hinch asked the peasants what colour carpet should she choose for her five bed, £1.1million mansion (funded by said peasants and still one bedroom less than her best bubs Stacey Solomon's house) after a 'tend flood ruined her old ones. Beige or beiger were the options, leaving viewers confused and wondering if they've had a sepia filter burnt into their retinas.

Tuesday became a brag fest after Sophie asked her shoppers what parts of her new mansion they would like to see. After she got no replies/obscenities sent to her, she compiled her own list of gushing messages so she could brag all the more. Photos followed of half finished rooms and nothing complete, so god only knows why she suggested a house tour. Anyone would think it's just to have a brag about her house that's not a farm house. The boot room made an appearance after Tattle said it had probably fallen to bits. "It's mah fa-vor-rit room, Dad and I made it togevahhh", (sic) Sophie squealed with delight.

Crimestoppers
MISSING - Father James, last seen wearing prison greys and shouting "Oi, Oi", randomly at anyone who would listen at soft play.

Vandalism - Three youths described as having a 'woolly' appearance are wanted after being seen damaging the lawns at the local Crem.

Classified #ads
Thread #500
A special thread dedicated to all the lies and bullshit Mrs Hinch has said over the years.

The Wiki
The pink button (top right) contains all information on nicknames, sayings etc and the reasoning behind them. If you're new/have had time away - please take a look. You won't be disappointed.

Art Exhibition
The Tattle art exhibition usually takes place at the beginning of each thread and/or when Mrs Hinch does/says something ridiculous. Ms @Andioooop has compiled a list of previous collectsshhuns somewhere on the Wiki.

For Sale
Dining table and chairs for sale. Unwanted gift so selling on. Please contact [email protected] for any viewing enquiries.

Letters to the Editor
Freda FF - Sophie Rose hasn't had any work done thank you very much.

Helena Hunz - Please remember to always be kond xoxo.

Lonely Hearts
JH - Seeking an older female companion to enjoy leisurely swims with.

Tesco Tomato - I'm looking for new friends to keep me company at my allotment. Must like giant flowers that spin in the wind, garden ornaments and other tat.
Omg @Sausage90 - just a bloody brilliant re-cap! Choking laughing here 🤣😂 just what i needed after such a shite day! Bravo! 👏🏻👏🏻❤
 
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You’re my inspiration today Tattle

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Why do the kids need their own bathrooms??? And why does henry need a big room? Why cant he sleep where normal dogs sleep in a bed somewhere in the house? What a waste of rooms.
She doesnt realise how luck she is “it hasnt sunk in yet “ still cant beleive this is our new home”
Bla bla bleeping bla
Brag brag brag bleeping brag…. Making me furious everytime she comes up on my stories
Id die for a house like that but i wouldnt be seen bragging like a divvy witch that she is
 
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There’s literally no way she’s 32. Is she really? She genuinely looks a decade older than that!
 
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They are a such a lovely family. So Kond!! 🤪
Bloody hell - Freda is a right old rough, nasty, bitchy piece of work!
Feel really sorry for Big Al, she's ghastly and has definitely hung out here I feel, similar language/attitude to what i was randomly subjected to (by a now "vanished" user) one afternoon when I was a fairly newish member.
I hadn't even made a cruel comment, it was relating to Sophie's issues with weight.

This woman - Freda Barker has much to answer for and has great influence over this whole faux debacle! Main narcassist in that family 🤬
 
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