This is where I think your husband needs to put his foot down and say she either comes in March or not at allThis is the best advice, and something my husband and I do with three of four of our parents - both of our parents are divorced. My MiL won't have it, though, and it's SO draining. She wanted to come up in March and my husband told her I might not be around because my dad is having a knee op, so she's now saying they'll come when I'm back. Jesus Christ. I don't know why she even wants to see me, TBH. It's not like she likes me
It's not small fry at all. I do not blame you one bit for ranting. It sounds like you are really isolated, tbh. That is very hard.Honest to God you think you’re the only one who can’t stand their mother out law, then you read this thread and realise you’re not alone by a long shot… 🫣 my heart goes out to you all on here.
Mine and my sister in law are both detestable for different reasons.
Mum in law very quietly domineering - you daren’t argue with her over anything.
Years ago, before I met my husband - she was desperately trying to fix him up with a young colleague of hers at work (they were both teachers) and she saw her as a lovely, pliable middle class lady with ‘good family’ ideal for Golden Balls (son). Anyway, this lady wasn’t interested at all… neither was son. She was bitterly disappointed. So fast forward 5 years or so, he meets me and we get married. I’m not what she has in mind, I’m from a working class northern town and my family - though by no means poor are less well to do. There’s a constant running ‘joke’ about me being a poor, working class scrote, mixing with middle class people like them…
On the night we announced our engagement - at a family meal, everyone but her congratulated us. Afterwards, she said “oh, so sorry I didn’t get up and hug you but I have a bad back”, and knew from that moment she’d be an arsehole.
So yeah, every opportunity she gets she brings up this other woman she wanted son to marry - 3 times on Xmas day, in front of me and him… everyone… in the end I said “there you go, married the wrong woman…” but he just laughed at me.
Proper narc, always needs to be centre of attention with all her various illnesses and ailments - bad back, always falling, bowel trouble, etc. she LOVES going to A&E every time she has a complaint - then straight on the phone to one of us wanting sympathy. The absolute glee in her voice, she loves it.
She absolutely insists on a weekly phone call - at weekend, but at a time that’s convenient for her, not us, and I get a WhatsApp ‘summons’ to do it. So I’ve started making hubby make the call and leaving the room or going off to do other things as I’m so tired of her. He works away a lot - and on the times he’s not here she still insists on it - I’ve never anything to say to her and she never asks how I am, how my work is going etc. it’s all her, their family and all the wonderful things they’re doing.
I know it’s really daft, got to speak to her and father in law in a bit and just dreading it. It’s nearly her birthday and she always wants to go out for a fancy meal at this horrible posh restaurant the family like - so she’s planning that at the moment. We always have the same shenanigans, she’ll book it - then complain and nitpick the menu, nitpick the staff - then happily hand over the best part of £400 for it… I’ve been looking at the menu already and I literally can’t find a single thing to eat on there. Husband knows I hate it, he won’t argue as I’m the odd one out.
I live a long way from my parents and rarely see them - gave up everything to be with my husband and there are honestly times I don’t know what I’m doing or why I’m here anymore. I don’t fit in or belong and she just makes me feel downtrodden.
Sorry for the long rant. This is small fry compared to a lot of the stories.
God I could have written this myself! No matter how awful life may get for husband and I it’ll NEVER be as bad as what BIL and even her step daughter go through. Never! My husband is the baby as well but even that isn’t in his favour. We will never know hardship or life struggles like BIL has. Weren’t even allowed to talk about our wedding as it was “it’s all dandy for you with your life, but your brother doesn’t have a solid relationship right now. Imagine how upset he will be…” . Husband insists he just doesn’t need her to be a mother in that way and that his brother is just pathetically clingyMy MIL isn't even obsessed with my DP, she pretty much ignores him then insults him when they meet up. His brother is the golden child. However, DP is so stockholm syndromed to her she can do no wrong. He claims she is just 'managing his brothers attenton seeking' and is more 'low key' with him. Fine if thats how he wants to call being neglected or verbally abused when she's so clearly capable of lavishing praise on BIL.
Iv posted on here before about my MIL. Well it's got worse. We had been no contact for about a year, she hadn't accepted the offer of an olive branch with me and so I decided for my own sanity to take a step back. I hadn't seen her for around a year. But my partner had recently seen her with my son for her birthday and around Christmas timeNo very recent stunts but just came to say I can't stand his family snide sly bunch of bitches. Honestly don't think I can marry into this shit.
Thank you! Yes, I am very isolated where we are. No family or friends - I’m not at all lonely as I cope better alone, but definitely isolated.It's not small fry at all. I do not blame you one bit for ranting. It sounds like you are really isolated, tbh. That is very hard.
You know that Only Fools and Horses episode where Uncle Albert falls down the pub cellar trap for compo? MiL mk II did that scam and scored a whole load of goodies from the shop where she'd "fallen over their sign" on the pavement!We took my late mother-in-law out for a lovely country pub lunch one time. Of course she had to start complaining because we didn't get a table near the window. To the establishment's credit they did move us to a window seat. My mother-in-law then sat with her back to the window and did not bother to admire the views even once.
Oh my days. I was moving into my old place and MIL was sorting everything there before I arrived. This was back when I was on speaking terms. Went behind my back and told the neighbours I'm a slag and to keep her husband away from me. Like seriously first thing first when your son was in jail I never so much as messaged or looked at another man considering I'm such a slag, secondly I'm not a homewrecker and thirdly even if I was like I'd want the neighbours minging husband. They always avoided me after that. Not that I was arsed about being friends but what a vicious thing to do. Get over it love I can give your son something you can't and u be good remembering that. That lot love to always imply he fancies this bird or shagged that one so when they find out I'm pregnant I'm gonna describe conception in great detail whilst staring the mother in the eyes.My MIL once wrote a letter to our next door neighbours to tell them what terrible people we were. We were on friendly terms with them though so they paid no attention to it.
She loved to tell people how wronged she was #ProfessionalVictim
Bloody hell... mine at least waited until we weren't speaking before she started slagging me off!Oh my days. I was moving into my old place and MIL was sorting everything there before I arrived. This was back when I was on speaking terms. Went behind my back and told the neighbours I'm a slag and to keep her husband away from me. Like seriously first thing first when your son was in jail I never so much as messaged or looked at another man considering I'm such a slag, secondly I'm not a homewrecker and thirdly even if I was like I'd want the neighbours minging husband. They always avoided me after that. Not that I was arsed about being friends but what a vicious thing to do. Get over it love I can give your son something you can't and u be good remembering that. That lot love to always imply he fancies this bird or shagged that one so when they find out I'm pregnant I'm gonna describe conception in great detail whilst staring the mother in the eyes.
Wtf have they just strolled into the house?Oh my fuckin days I spoke too soon. Surprise pregnancy reveal is out the window as well. Wanna know why??? On my fridge is a scan picture of baby. Just having a nap and I've woken up to hear her and DIL chilling in my kitchen with no sign of my fella. WHAT THE FUCK?? Going down now to ask what on earth is going on.
False alarm my fella was with them it was his dad's work break. Was being all sheepish and trying to lay low and sneak them round while I was napping. But his motor mouth mother can never help herself. I just shook my head and went back upstairs. He had the mind to remove my scan so that's something I guess.Wtf have they just strolled into the house?
I found hormones made what was already shitty situations worse like it was unbearable to be round some people@Brewtime87 enjoy!!!
Also @Caledonianprincess I know tbh lately I've gotten so fed up of him. Dunno if it's cause I'm pregnant an hormones an all that but the man just winds me up with an absolute passion.
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