MOD & FOD #33 Bots a plenty, we're under attack. Don't blame me I've been hacked hacked!

[washyourhands]

Hello and welcome to all newbies to this thread...I hope you all enjoyed the complimentary drinks and nibbles in the reception area.

Two things I’m absolutely gagging to know:

1. Why now, what is it that has compelled you to come here? I’m genuinely glad you have because it means the Tattle is strong in you. Just there are so many of you, I’ve never seen such an influx.

2. We had a security breach the other night. Our very own @Pocahontas was supposed to be on watch but to be fair she let us ALL down, but more importantly she let herself down. We don’t hold grudges here at Tattle so she did her time on the naughty step, we explained why she was there and then hugged it out. However as newbies I feel that now is the perfect time for you to show your commitment and join our security team
VAGINAS - Volunteers Against Greedy Instagram Narcissistic Arseholes Society - as one of the VAGINAS you’ll be given a high viz jacket an extra £3.75 per month in your pay packet and 20% Gusto code. You’ll be expected to screen shot ANY dodgy interlopers posts, go and check their profiles for any info and respond, but only if you have back up...don’t put yourself at risk.
So sign up to become one of FODs VAGINAS your Tattle needs you!

I’m laughing so hard at this....This week I saw a comment suspecting us newbies of being journalists - I decided that, if challenged, I’d be happy to Zoom call you @Dogmuck and prove I’m just a really nosy cow who’s been ADDICTED to these threads for months! Devastated I let y’all down by not screen-shotting the MoFo “yo” post

 

[PoorPatrol]

@Housedelaclunge

 

[Pain of chocolate]

I don't know how long he was online for but the poor bastard wouldn't have had the time to go through all the posts since yesterday afternoon. It must be killing him not knowing what's been said about him. But then it is so bleeping freaky that he is THAT obsessed that he keeps on coming back!

 

[Dogmuck]

I’m laughing so hard at this....This week I saw a comment suspecting us newbies of being journalists - I decided that, if challenged, I’d be happy to Zoom call you @Dogmuck and prove I’m just a really nosy cow who’s been ADDICTED to these threads for months! Devastated I let y’all down by not screen-shotting the MoFo “yo” post

Are you laughing hard in a good way or are you laughing hard in an angry way? Hope it’s a good way, cos this thread tonight is hilarious and I’m hoping that some of the fun is making its way to you...did I ask if you were a journalist? That’s not on my list of usual interrogation interview questions, if it was me I apologise cos I’m not even really drinking that much atm (mainly cos some cheeky lush((@MadeinFulham)) keeps necking the tattle corp supplies) so I can’t even blame the Blue Nun.
Did I just detect a sign up for VAGINAS there? DM me jacket size - disclaimer we only have XL and XXL left in the stock room but I think @SansaStark had a good idea about French pleats which could fashion up these sizes. Thanks for coming and welcome, please come through to the main room.

 

[yellow_daisies]

Was a big fan of MoD/FoD #5 "Don't be fooled by the crap that I flog, I'm still, I'm still Clemmie from the blog"

 

[Pocahontas]

Was a big fan of MoD/FoD #5 "Don't be fooled by the crap that I flog, I'm still, I'm still Clemmie from the blog"

I loved that one too. My second favourite was ‘Hanging out with my secret nanny, doing admin on my fanny’

 

[washyourhands]

Are you laughing hard in a good way or are you laughing hard in an angry way? Hope it’s a good way, cos this thread tonight is hilarious and I’m hoping that some of the fun is making its way to you...did I ask if you were a journalist? That’s not on my list of usual interrogation interview questions, if it was me I apologise cos I’m not even really drinking that much atm (mainly cos some cheeky lush((@MadeinFulham)) keeps necking the tattle corp supplies) so I can’t even blame the Blue Nun.
Did I just detect a sign up for VAGINAS there? DM me jacket size - disclaimer we only have XL and XXL left in the stock room but I think @SansaStark had a good idea about French pleats which could fashion up these sizes. Thanks for coming and welcome, please come through to the main room.

In a good way!! Sign me up for a French-tucked jacket - I’ll wear it with a Breton, maybe accessorising it with a jaunty trilby. I’m a pub landlady tho so can we raise the wine brand standards a bit?

 

[Mangofruity]

I loved that one too. My second favourite was ‘Hanging out with my secret nanny, doing admin on my fanny’

It's 'You're pointless and he is a father.' for me. Never gets old.

 

[qwerty_79]

So many pages to catch up on but hilarious!

 

[Motherthreebeige]

Can I please be a Southern Hemisphere VAGINA, my USP is that I’m just starting the day as you lot of trolls are heading back to your bridges for the night.

 

[rainbowlemon]

Sentry duty goals

Some good tips for you here hun:



"You think you can deceive me ?"

Handall may we pass?

"Never"

"Be warned I will honour my sworth oath to protect this realm as it's gate keeper.If your return threatens the safety the bifrost shall close and you will freeze to death in the cold waste".

Also re comparing to other influencers I missed out one as it was in stories mother of five boys also did something with not on the high street for father's day so her gap was less than 10 days and is now also plugging nivea. So she's done three in less than 16 days.

Mother of all adventures- is apparently getting free teeth.

Multidad even got a #AD 11 days ago.

Court adamo- did a #AD for soap from may and swimming costumes in May.

Blossoming birds- baby food 17 days ago + nivea in may.

Triplet dad is out on the beg and even tagging Asda pr team + normal asda on clothes he bought.

In other news I found my cats long lost twin.

 

[ILoveUnicorns]

ALL HAIL OUR LORD AND SAVIOUR DOGMUCK

She is a VIP VAGINA, we must obey

 

[Mintytea]

It’s been a full two weeks since he posted (not counting the black square because that was purely performative). He must be absolutely dying to post some more “original content”. I can’t imagine what the atmosphere is like in the house of horrors at the moment.

Sorry I’m so behind why has he stopped posting

 

[Bigmouth_bigpants]

Blimey, I go to bed at 11 last night and I wake up to two whole pages of chat to work through!

Excellent work Pain of chocolate on your detective skills, surely this must mean a promotion up the ranks of the VAGINAS and an extra 10% off Gusto and maybe a discount code for some Veja trainers

Just a few thoughts from me as I was nodding off last night... if Housedelaclunge isn’t Sly/Clam, then whoever it is is staying very quiet considering we’re all talking about them so much. If it were me, I’d be on here creating all kinds of havoc and having a right old laugh making the silly tattlers think I was a grabby instac*nt Instead, their silence is quite telling...although we know they’ve still been dropping in to check up on us

 

[OhMyWord]

Blimey, I go to bed at 11 last night and I wake up to two whole pages of chat to work through!

Excellent work Pain of chocolate on your detective skills, surely this must mean a promotion up the ranks of the VAGINAS and an extra 10% off Gusto and maybe a discount code for some Veja trainers

Just a few thoughts from me as I was nodding off last night... if Housedelaclunge isn’t Sly/Clam, then whoever it is is staying very quiet considering we’re all talking about them so much. If it were me, I’d be on here creating all kinds of havoc and having a right old laugh making the silly tattlers think I was a grabby instac*nt Instead, their silence is quite telling...although we know they’ve still been dropping in to check up on us

Same here, lights off around 11pm and I wake up to so many comments - don’t you people ever sleep?! I hope the night watch went well!

As we all took the trip down thread title memory lane, can I just say how happy I am that we don’t have to listen or read about MOD’s #pressdiscount #ad #spon Fanny Admin anymore. Not just because, as the resident Canadian here (sorry!), fanny means butt when I first hear the word, but because it’s just not something I want or need to know about anyone. Shame she has to pay for waxes now, I guess?

 

[Sweettutu]

Bloody hell. Having been here since the first Fred, am still just a “chatty member”. Never come up with a title. Clearly do not pull my weight. If we were a dragon boat racing team I’d be in the back row having a tit time getting splashed and generally making a hash of it.

I loved the “when I throw my wife under a bus I always use national expresss #ad” title.

We never did get the background on Clam’s run ins with cash carraway. Why DID she dislike her so much? Cash really seemed to get under her skin. I miss Cash. None of it really made any sense and she was full of contradictions and story gaps but duck me it was entertaining.

 

[Bigmouth_bigpants]

Same here, lights off around 11pm and I wake up to so many comments - don’t you people ever sleep?! I hope the night watch went well!

As we all took the trip down thread title memory lane, can I just say how happy I am that we don’t have to listen or read about MOD’s #pressdiscount #ad #spon Fanny Admin anymore. Not just because, as the resident Canadian here (sorry!), fanny means butt when I first hear the word, but because it’s just not something I want or need to know about anyone. Shame she has to pay for waxes now, I guess?

Bloody Canadians, always apologising!!!

Bloody hell. Having been here since the first Fred, am still just a “chatty member”. Never come up with a title. Clearly do not pull my weight. If we were a dragon boat racing team I’d be in the back row having a tit time getting splashed and generally making a hash of it.

I loved the “when I throw my wife under a bus I always use national expresss #ad” title.

We never did get the background on Clam’s run ins with cash carraway. Why DID she dislike her so much? Cash really seemed to get under her skin. I miss Cash. None of it really made any sense and she was full of contradictions and story gaps but duck me it was entertaining.

Alice maintains that Cash had somehow wronged a friend of hers, but I don’t believe it. I think Cash was just very outspoken and Clemmie didn’t like it, and instead of letting it go, waged a one woman crusade against Cash to try and bring her down.

By the time I caught wind of ‘The influencer trainer’ Instagram account it had been shut down, but I have absolutely no doubt that Clammie was behind that, as well. If you read Alice’s posts here, she makes reference to TIT and says how funny it is and how all the influencers it takes the piss out of also find it hilarious. Similar to how Alice kept saying how Clemmies blog was ‘lovely’. Idiot.

 

[Pocahontas]

She is a VIP VAGINA, we must obey

Are you saying our dear @Dogmuck is a ... designer vagina??

 

[Daddykins]

I joined circa thread 3 as Mummykins but got banned during Alicegate for expressing deep sympathy for Clemmie during the initial peak of the crisis. But I’m back as Daddykins as I am A Bloke.

 

[Emmadale]

Bloody hell. Having been here since the first Fred, am still just a “chatty member”. Never come up with a title. Clearly do not pull my weight. If we were a dragon boat racing team I’d be in the back row having a tit time getting splashed and generally making a hash of it.

I loved the “when I throw my wife under a bus I always use national expresss #ad” title.

We never did get the background on Clam’s run ins with cash carraway. Why DID she dislike her so much? Cash really seemed to get under her skin. I miss Cash. None of it really made any sense and she was full of contradictions and story gaps but duck me it was entertaining.

Wasn’t it you who did the summary of Alice’s witch fest on here? If yes, that’s a pretty good accolade to have as it’s probably what led to her being outed!

Sorry I’m so behind why has he stopped posting

Cause his wife’s a racist